Your Wedding Ring: To Buy Or Not?

Wedding rings are a symbol of everlasting love and commitment. While there are many traditions and expectations surrounding weddings, couples today are increasingly personalising their weddings and making their own choices. One such choice is buying your own wedding ring. While it was traditionally expected that the man would buy the bride's wedding ring, modern couples are increasingly choosing to buy their own rings or split the cost. This can be for a variety of reasons, such as wanting a particular style, having shared finances, or simply wanting to treat yourself.

It's your choice

There are many reasons why you may want to buy your own wedding ring. Firstly, it's your ring, and you should be happy with it! You will be wearing it every day, so it's important that you love it. If you have a dream design in mind, you can make it a reality by buying your own ring. You can also ensure that it is within your budget and that you get the best value for money.

Secondly, it's your choice! Wedding traditions have become more personalised and less traditional over the years, and it's now common for couples to split the cost of the wedding or for the bride to retain her last name. So, why not extend this to buying your own wedding ring? It can be a powerful statement of your commitment to your partner and your future together. It can also be a way to assert your identity and show that you are equal partners in the relationship.

Thirdly, it's practical. If you have better credit or more financial stability than your partner, it makes sense to use your financial resources to contribute to (or cover) the cost of the wedding rings. This is especially true if you have shared finances or plan to combine your finances in the future. It can also be a way to relieve your partner of the financial burden, especially if they have already spent a lot on your engagement ring.

Finally, it's fun! You can make a day of it and turn it into a memorable experience by designing and crafting your own wedding rings with your partner. This can be a wonderful way to celebrate your engagement and create unique, perfectly fitting rings that will be cherished for a lifetime.

So, if you want to buy your own wedding ring, go for it! Ultimately, it's your choice, and you should do what feels right for you and your partner.

Budgeting

The cost of wedding rings can vary significantly, with the average cost being between £100 and £3000, depending on the materials used and the complexity of the design. It is worth noting that the price will also depend on the weight and style of the metal chosen, so be sure to discuss your budget with your jeweller to find an option that matches your financial plan.

If you are looking for ways to save money on your wedding rings, one option is to consider creating your own rings at a workshop. This can be a fun and memorable experience for couples, and it may also be more cost-effective than purchasing ready-made rings. Additionally, you could opt for a simple band for the ceremony and then upgrade to a more expensive band later on, perhaps using gift money from the wedding.

Another way to save money is to shop around at different jewellers to find the best price and to consider purchasing your wedding ring from the same jeweller where you bought your engagement ring. Some jewellers may offer discounts or deals when purchasing multiple rings.

It is also worth considering the long-term costs associated with your wedding ring. For example, you may need to resize your ring in the future, which will incur additional costs. Additionally, it is advisable to insure your wedding ring, as well as your engagement ring, for loss, damage, and theft. This will add to the overall cost, so be sure to factor this into your budget.

Finally, remember that the most important aspect of budgeting for your wedding ring is ensuring that you stay within your financial means. Discuss your budget with your partner and decide on a price range that works for both of you. Ultimately, the most important thing is that you choose a ring that you love and that symbolises your commitment to each other.

Traditions

Ancient Traditions:

The practice of exchanging wedding rings has a long history, dating back to ancient civilisations like the Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans. In ancient Egypt, only women wore rings, usually made of ivory or bone, symbolising their loyalty. The Romans used rings as a symbol of a business contract or legal agreement between families, with the groom giving the bride a ring. By the 2nd century AD, Roman brides from wealthy families received two rings: an iron band for home and a gold one for public display.

Christian Influence:

The Christian church played a role in shaping wedding ring traditions during the 12th century. The church established the wedding ceremony, giving the exchange of rings a sacramental meaning. This may have contributed to the tradition of having separate engagement and wedding rings.

Symbolic Meanings:

The wedding ring is often seen as a symbol of enduring love, devotion, and commitment. The circular shape represents eternity, with no beginning or end. According to ancient beliefs, the ring was worn on the fourth finger of the left hand, known as the "ring finger," because it was thought to have a vein running directly to the heart, the "vena amoris." This tradition was further reinforced by Christian betrothal ceremonies, where the priest would touch the wedding band to three fingers in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

Gender Dynamics:

Historically, the exchange of rings was one-sided, with only brides receiving rings. This changed during World War II, when men started wearing wedding bands to remind them of their loved ones back home while they were away at war. Today, it is common for both partners to exchange rings during the wedding ceremony, symbolising their mutual commitment.

Financial Considerations:

Traditionally, the bride's family was responsible for the bride's ring, while the groom or his family paid for the bride's ring. However, modern couples often approach this differently, with some choosing to split the cost or contribute from a shared account, reflecting their shared expenses and financial equality.

Contemporary Trends:

While traditions hold significance, modern couples are increasingly creating their own customs. Some couples prefer to shop for rings together, ensuring both partners are comfortable with the style and cost. Others may opt for surprise rings, adding an element of romance and personal touch. Ultimately, the decision on who buys the wedding rings is a personal one, based on the couple's preferences, financial situation, and what feels right for them.

Empowerment

In the past, it was typical for men to pay for the engagement and wedding rings, continuing the tradition of men being the primary financial providers. However, times have changed, and now women are just as likely to be the breadwinners or to have their own financial independence. By buying their own ring, women are asserting their equality and financial autonomy. This decision can be especially meaningful for those who feel uncomfortable with the historical context of rings, ownership, and weddings.

Additionally, buying your own wedding ring can be an empowering way to ensure you get the ring you truly want. You know your taste and preferences best, so taking the reins on this decision can result in a ring that perfectly matches your vision. This is especially important as you will be wearing this ring every day for the rest of your life. It should bring you joy and be a symbol of your love and commitment, not a source of disappointment or a reminder of outdated traditions.

For some, buying their own wedding ring is also a practical decision. Perhaps their partner has already spent a significant amount on an engagement ring, or they have joint finances and don't want their partner to bear the entire cost. In these cases, buying your own ring can be a thoughtful and considerate choice, demonstrating a commitment to financial fairness and equality within the relationship.

Ultimately, the decision to buy your own wedding ring is a personal one. What matters most is that you feel empowered to make choices that align with your values and result in a symbol of your love that you will cherish forever.

Customisation

Secondly, customisation allows you to create a ring that complements your engagement ring. For example, if you have a large or unusually shaped engagement ring, you may opt for a shaped wedding band that sits well with it. You can also choose the metal, style, and design of your wedding ring to match your engagement ring. While it is no longer traditional for wedding bands to match, some people still prefer this.

Thirdly, customisation allows you to create a unique ring that holds special meaning for you. For example, you could melt a vintage ring or family heirloom into a new wedding ring, or create something new from a diamond bracelet you found. You could even make the ring yourself, with the help of a master jeweller, for a truly personalised experience.

Finally, customisation allows you to work within your budget. By designing your own ring, you can choose the metal, cut, and carat that work best for your finances. This is especially helpful if you are on a tight budget or prefer to spend your money on other things, such as a house or holidays.

Frequently asked questions