Bringing Guests To A French Wedding: What You Need To Know

French weddings are known for their elegance and sophistication, and often take place in beautiful locations such as a château or a domaine. The focus is on the two families coming together, rather than the bride, and the couple will each have a mix of male and female witnesses, known as les témoins, instead of a bridal party. The witnesses sign the wedding registry and can be any age or gender, usually wearing what they please.

French weddings consist of two ceremonies: a civil ceremony, and a symbolic service. The civil ceremony is performed by the mayor at the town hall and is a legal obligation. It is often attended by only close family and witnesses, and takes place the day before the symbolic service. The symbolic service is the real wedding and has more meaning, whether it is a religious ceremony or a secular celebration.

French weddings are known for their gourmet food and wine, with cocktail hours lasting up to three hours, and receptions that can go on until the early morning. The reception dinner is usually served late, and the number of attendees can range from 200 to 300 people.

The civil ceremony

Location

Requirements

To be considered valid in the eyes of the French government, a couple must undergo the civil ceremony before any religious or symbolic ceremony. This rule is strictly enforced. Additionally, at least one member of the couple must have a long-lasting bond with the town or local area where the civil ceremony is held. This condition is typically met if either partner or their parents own or rent a house in France, and they must have lived there for at least 30 days before submitting the application.

Documents

The list of required documents for a civil ceremony in France can be extensive and may include:

• Valid IDs or passports for both partners
• Proof of address or residency permit in France
• Original birth certificates dated less than three months from the application date
• A list of at least two witnesses and their personal details, including IDs or passports
• For non-French nationals, additional documents like a certificate of celibacy and affidavit of law, which must be translated and apostilled
• A prenuptial agreement (optional)

Ceremony Process

• Arrival of the Couple and Guests: The ceremony begins with the entrance of the couple, followed by greetings and introductions.
• Introduction of the Mayor: The mayor, a key figure, presides over the proceedings and provides guidance. They set the tone with opening remarks and explain the ceremony's procedure.
• Opening Remarks and Explanation: The mayor confirms that both parties are entering a legally binding union and asks for their agreement.
• Declaration of Intent: The couple declares their commitment and intention to marry, answering questions from the mayor to affirm their consent.
• Declaration of the Couple as Married: The mayor declares the couple as married, followed by cheers and applause from the guests.
• Signing of the Marriage Certificate: The couple signs the official marriage certificate, legally binding their union.
• Exchange of Rings and First Kiss: The couple exchanges rings and seals their union with a kiss.
• Receiving the Family Book: The couple receives the "livret de famille," an official document recording the marriage and subsequent life events.
• Closing Remarks and Congratulations: The mayor offers closing remarks and congratulations, marking the end of the civil ceremony.
• Wedding Recessional: The newlyweds and their guests exit the town hall, officially starting their married life together.

The reception

Food and Drink

When it comes to the food and drink at a French wedding, you can expect nothing less than the best. The cuisine is usually reflective of French culture, with traditional dishes such as beef bourguignon, potatoes au gratin, and coq au vin. The meal will be seated, individually plated, and multi-course. There will only be one meal option, and the main dish is often red meat. Good news is that because it's France, your one option will be excellent.

Entertainment

At a French wedding, you can expect nothing less than the finest entertainment. The goal is to have an over-the-top reception that really gets the guests excited. This usually means hiring a top-notch band or DJ and going all out with the decorations and lighting. The key idea is that guests can’t be bored during a wedding night.

Traditions

There are several French wedding traditions that are worth mentioning:

• The Father-Daughter Dance Opener: The father-daughter dance is often seen in France as a great way to get the party started. It is a special moment that celebrates the bond between a father and daughter.
• White Ribbon-Cutting: This is an interesting tradition that happens at the beginning of the wedding reception. The bride cuts a white ribbon with scissors, which symbolises her ability to pass through the obstacles of married life.
• La Coupe de Mariage: This is an engraved, two-handled cup that is used to celebrate the marriage for the first time. It is passed down to the bride and groom as a family heirloom, and they drink from it together, pledging their love and commitment to each other.
• Tourner Les Serviettes: When the couple enters the dining room, or when guests are excited about something, the French will take their cloth napkins and raise them over their heads and twirl them.

The attire

French weddings are known for their elegance and sophistication, so it's important to dress appropriately. The attire you wear to a French wedding depends on the dress code, location, season, and style of the wedding. Here are some tips on what to wear to a French wedding:

For Women:

Traditional French wedding attire for women includes a chic cocktail dress or a formal gown. The dress should be classy and elegant, and it's best to avoid anything too revealing. The length of your dress should depend on the formality of the wedding. For a formal wedding, a long dress is ideal, while a knee-length dress is perfect for a semi-formal wedding. As for a casual wedding, a midi or maxi dress would be suitable. It's important to consider the venue and the season when choosing your outfit. For a summer wedding, lightweight and breathable fabrics such as cotton, chiffon, or linen are recommended. Pastel colours, jewel tones, or earthy tones are good choices, and you can accessorise with statement jewellery, stylish hats, and matching shoes and belts. Avoid wearing white, and if the wedding is in a church, be mindful to cover your shoulders and back.

For Men:

Men usually wear a suit or a blazer paired with dress pants. For a summer wedding in the south of France, a light-coloured suit in beige, light blue, or light grey is a good option. A linen suit or a linen shirt and trousers can be a great choice for a more casual look.

The food and drink

French weddings are known for their delectable food and sophisticated dining experiences. From Parisian delicacies to provincial fine dining, the food and drink at a French wedding are sure to impress. Here is what you can expect:

The Food

French wedding menus typically feature a variety of tasty dishes, ranging from informal to extravagant. The structure often includes canapes, a three-course meal, and a late-night snack. Here are some specific items you might find on the menu:

• Bread: Sliced baguettes, little buns, and other types of "pain" are commonly served with delicious butter, sometimes even whipped.
• Starter Trio: Foie gras, scallops, and lobster are traditional options for a decadent start to the meal.
• Main Course: While there is usually only one option, it will undoubtedly be excellent. Popular choices include regional specialties such as "taureau" (bull), coq au vin, beef bourguignon, and duck breast. Red meat is often the main dish.
• Cheese: As France is known for its delicious cheeses, expect a cheese board to make an appearance in some form, whether as canapes, a grazing table, or a follow-up to the dessert.
• Dessert: The traditional French wedding dessert is a pyramid of caramel-covered, cream-filled profiteroles, known as a croquembouche. However, other options include macarons, eclairs, creme brulee, and fruit pies like Le Clafoutis.
• Late-Night Snack: To help soak up the alcohol, French weddings often serve onion soup at the end of the night before guests depart, usually around 4 or 5 am.

The Drink

• Cocktail Hour: The cocktail hour is an important part of a French wedding and can last up to three hours. It's a time to enjoy quality drinks, mostly wine, and hors d'oeuvres like pâté, mini vegetable tarts, and French cheeses.
• Champagne: Champagne is, of course, a must at French weddings. The most common tradition is the Champagne tower, or "fontaine de Champagne," where Champagne is poured into a pyramid of flutes or coupes.
• Local Wine: Especially in the South of France, local wine is proudly featured, often from wine trucks.
• Late-Night Drinks: French wedding parties can continue until the early morning, and more food and drinks may be served to keep the celebration going.

The entertainment

Entertainment at a French Wedding

French weddings are known for their elegance and sophistication, and the entertainment is no exception. From musicians and bands to DJs and surprise performances, there are many options to choose from to create a memorable celebration.

Live Music

Live music is a popular choice for French weddings, with many couples opting for classical or jazz ensembles to create a sophisticated atmosphere. String quartets, such as the Montpellier String Quartet, are a classic option, while gypsy jazz bands like the Toulouse Gypsy Jazz Band bring a touch of French flair. For something more unique, consider a saxophone player, such as the Dordogne Saxophonist, or a classical and flamenco guitarist.

Bands and DJs

If you're looking to get your guests on the dance floor, a wedding band or DJ is a great option. Bands playing pop, rock, soul, and funk covers are always a hit, with groups like the Riviera Roaming Band and the Nice Soul Band offering an extensive repertoire of songs. For something more interactive, consider a roaming band like the Riviera Rock Band, which performs acoustically or with electric amplification.

DJs are also a popular choice, with options ranging from a London-based DJ group like Ready or Not Live DJ to bilingual British DJs like Just Jams Wedding DJ, who can cater to international crowds.

Surprise Performances

For a truly memorable celebration, surprise performances can be arranged. Secret Singers, disguised as waiters, will give your guests an unexpected treat. Or, for a unique twist, consider the Singing Waiters, who go undercover as regular waitstaff before surprising everyone with their performance.

Magicians and More

If you want to add a touch of magic to your wedding, consider hiring a magician like Dan Brazier, who specialises in advanced sleight of hand and special effects.

With so many entertainment options to choose from, French weddings can be tailored to create a unique and memorable celebration for you and your guests.

Frequently asked questions