Asking your closest friends to be your bridesmaids is an important part of the wedding planning process. While there are no hard and fast rules, it is generally advised to ask your bridal party to be part of your special day anywhere between six months to a year in advance. This gives your bridesmaids enough time to prepare and plan. There are many ways to ask your friends to be your bridesmaids, from sending a simple text to putting together a creative gift box. While some brides prefer to ask their bridal party in person, others opt for a more low-key approach, such as sending a text message or making a phone call. Ultimately, the most important thing is to choose a method that feels comfortable and meaningful to you.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Time to ask | 8 months to a year in advance of the wedding |
Method | In-person, over text, phone call, FaceTime, or a gift |
What You'll Learn
Is it acceptable to ask bridesmaids over text?
Asking your bridesmaids over text is a quick and convenient way to get your bridal party together, especially if you are pressed for time. However, it is considered informal and may not be the best way to make your bridesmaid proposal memorable.
While it is acceptable to ask your bridesmaids over text, it is important to note that this method may not be as personal or meaningful as other options. Asking in person, for example, allows you to gauge their reaction and make it a special moment for both of you. It also gives them an opportunity to ask any questions they may have about the role.
If you do decide to ask your bridesmaids over text, there are a few things you can do to make your proposal more thoughtful:
- Send a heartfelt message expressing your friendship and how much it would mean to have them by your side.
- Include a favourite photo of the two of you.
- Use a GIF or invisible ink (if you have an iPhone) to make it more fun.
- Follow up with a phone call or video chat to discuss the details and show your excitement.
Remember, it is also essential to consider your bridesmaids' feelings and preferences. If they are expecting a more elaborate proposal, they may be disappointed with a simple text message.
Overall, while texting your bridesmaids proposal is acceptable, it may be more meaningful to take the time to ask in person or with a creative, personalised gesture.
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What are some creative ways to ask someone to be your bridesmaid?
Asking your friends to be your bridesmaids is a big deal, so you'll want to make your proposal unique and unforgettable. Here are some creative ways to ask that special question:
Gifts
- Give a "Bridesmaid" keepsake gift, such as skincare gift sets, jewellery, pretty hair ties, tote bags, personalised tumblers, stemless wine glasses, or notebooks.
- Send a letter in a bottle with a handwritten note inside that pops the question.
- Surprise them with a personalised "Will You Be My Bridesmaid?" print.
- Send cookies or cupcakes with "Will you be my bridesmaid?" written on them in icing.
- Put together a bridesmaid proposal box filled with treats such as chocolate candies, face masks, notebooks, scented candles, and cosy socks.
- Send a bouquet of flowers with a personalised message.
- Give a personalised wine or champagne bottle with a customised label that pops the question.
In-Person
- Invite your friends to a dinner party at your place and bring out a cake iced with the question.
- Surprise them at their doorstep with a bouquet of flowers and a bottle of wine or sparkling juice.
- Host a themed movie night and pop the question by referencing a character or scene in the movie.
- Invite your friends to a wine-tasting night and present a bottle with a custom label that asks the question.
- Meet for afternoon tea and share how much it would mean for them to stand alongside you as you say "I do".
- Stage a photo of your friends in matching robes and gift them to your bridal party as you ask them to be in your wedding.
- Treat your friends to an afternoon at the nail salon and gift them a wedding-focused colour as you explain that they'll need to wear it during the celebration as bridesmaids.
- Host a tattoo or piercing party if your bridal party loves ink and body jewellery.
Other Ideas
- Send a bridesmaid proposal card via mail or digitally.
- Send a floral card asking the question, tucked into a pretty flower arrangement.
- Ask with a luggage tag if you're planning a destination wedding.
- Send a box of macarons with "Will you be my bridesmaid?" written on them in edible glitter.
- Fill a tote bag with each person's preferred treats, such as favourite snacks, beauty products, or go-to rosé.
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What are some ideas for who to ask to be your bridesmaid?
Asking your closest friends to be your bridesmaids is a great opportunity to show them how important they are to you. There are many ways to do this, and it's essential to make it memorable. Here are some ideas for who to ask to be your bridesmaid:
Family Members
Asking family members is a popular option as they are important people in your life, and it's harder to get rid of family than friends! You can ask your sister, future sister-in-law, cousins, or other close family members. A benefit of this approach is that you won't hurt your friends' feelings by not including them. You can explain that you're only including family. However, some cons include potentially feeling like your bridal party is incomplete without friends, and not everyone may stay in touch with their family members in the long run.
Close Girlfriends
Asking your girlfriends is another great option as they are the people you often call first when you have good news or fight with your fiance. They have seen you through thick and thin, so who better to stand with you at your wedding? A con to this approach is that some brides drift apart from their bridesmaids over time. If you decide to ask friends, you need to be okay with the possibility of not staying close to all of them forever.
Mix of Family and Friends
This option gives you the best of both worlds and is a popular choice. It makes sense since both friends and family play such significant roles in our lives. However, a disadvantage is that if someone is upset about not being included, you can't blame it on only asking family or only asking friends.
Number of Bridesmaids
There are no hard and fast rules about how many bridesmaids to have. You can have as few as one or as many as you like! Your number of bridesmaids doesn't have to match the number of groomsmen either. If there are more bridesmaids, you can pair them up with groomsmen, and vice versa.
Remember, selecting your bridesmaids is one of the most important and fun elements of wedding planning. Take your time to consider who you want to accompany you to dress appointments, celebrate with at your bachelorette party, and get ready with on your big day. Most importantly, who do you want standing next to you at the wedding?
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When is the best time to ask someone to be your bridesmaid?
Congratulations on your engagement! One of the most exciting parts about getting engaged is sharing the news with your loved ones. After celebrating this milestone, you might be eager to start planning your wedding and picking your bridal party. But before you rush into asking your closest friends to be your bridesmaids, here are some things to consider when deciding on the best time to pop the question:
- Wedding Date: It is advisable to wait until you know your wedding date before asking your bridesmaids. Knowing the date will allow your bridesmaids to determine if they can commit to the role, especially if it conflicts with other commitments or life events.
- Take Your Time: It is recommended to take a few weeks or even months to thoughtfully consider your choices. If your wedding is a year or two away, use this time to reflect on the people you want by your side throughout the wedding planning process and the big day itself.
- Know the Wedding Details: Before asking your bridesmaids, try to figure out the type of bridal shower and bachelorette party you want. These details might influence the size of your bridal party, and sharing this information will help your bridesmaids feel more prepared and excited about their role.
- Be Engaged for at Least 60 Days: To avoid rushing your decision, give yourself at least two months to plan and reflect on the number of bridesmaids you want and the people you want to include.
- Consider the Notice for Your Bridesmaids: It is considerate to give your bridesmaids enough notice, especially for destination weddings or if they need to save money for bridal events. A good rule of thumb is to ask your bridesmaids anywhere between six months to a year in advance of your wedding date.
Once you've decided on the timing, there are numerous creative ways to ask your friends to be your bridesmaids, from sending a thoughtful text to planning a special dinner or surprise. Remember to share your excitement and make your proposal memorable!
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What are some ways to ask someone to be your bridesmaid in person?
While it's possible to ask someone to be your bridesmaid via text, some people may consider it too informal for such an important question. It's generally considered more meaningful to ask in person or, at the very least, over a phone or video call.
Give a "Bridesmaid" Keepsake Gift
You can give your bridesmaids-to-be a gift that they can keep long after your wedding. Popular choices include personalized jewelry boxes, monogrammed towels, skincare gift sets, jewelry, pretty hair ties (to wear on the wedding day), tote bags, personalized tumblers, stemless wine glasses, and notebooks.
Send a Letter in a Bottle
Write asection: "Will you be my bridesmaid?" on a small sheet of paper, roll it up, and place it inside a tiny message bottle. Seal the bottle and hand it to your future bridesmaid for a memorable moment.
Surprise Them at Their Doorstep
Show up at their doorstep with a bouquet of flowers and a bottle of wine or sparkling juice. You can even bring the bottle of champagne to toast with once they accept your proposal!
Create a Personalized "Will You Be My Bridesmaid?" Print
Look online for a beautiful print that you can customize with your bridesmaid's name and your wedding date. This gift will not only be a sweet way to pop the question but also a wonderful keepsake.
Ask Them Over Dinner
Invite your besties to a dinner party at your place. Prepare a delicious meal or order from a restaurant, and don't forget to pour some bubbly! Bring out a cake with "Will you be my bridesmaid?" written on it to end the night with a sweet proposal.
Put Together a Bridesmaid Proposal Box
You can buy a pre-packaged bridesmaid proposal box or make your own if you're feeling crafty. Fill a box with goodies like chocolate candies, face masks, notebooks, scented candles, and cozy socks. Decorate the box with stickers and tissue paper that matches your wedding theme.
Send a Bouquet of Flowers with a Note
Flowers are always a wonderful way to show your love and appreciation. Send your future bridesmaids a bouquet of beautiful blossoms along with a personalized note that ends with "Will you be my bridesmaid?" For a longer-lasting alternative, you can send a houseplant, succulent, or terrarium.
Surprise Them with a Bridesmaid Robe
Surprise your bridesmaids with matching personalized robes. This is a fun way to ask them to stand by your side on your big day, and it will also make for adorable photos!
Give a Personalized Wine or Champagne Bottle
Buy your bridesmaid-to-be's favorite bottle of wine or champagne and affix a customized label with "Will you be my bridesmaid?" on it. You can even present the bottle with a pair of champagne flutes or wine glasses for an extra special touch.
Remember, when asking someone to be your bridesmaid, it's important to be clear about your expectations and respectful of their decision if they decline. Being a bridesmaid is a significant time and financial commitment, so make sure they understand what's expected of them in terms of pre-wedding events, dress purchases, and wedding-related tasks.
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Frequently asked questions
While it is ultimately up to you how you ask your friends to be your bridesmaids, it is generally advised to do something more memorable. You could send them a package, a handwritten note, or ask them in person. If you do choose to ask over text, you can use a GIF or invisible ink to make it more fun.
There are many creative ways to ask your friends to be your bridesmaids, such as:
- Sending them a "Will You Be My Bridesmaid?" card with a heartfelt message and a photo of the two of you
- Giving them a gift box with treats and a note
- Sending a letter in a bottle with a handwritten note
- Asking them over a dinner party with a cake that has the question iced on top
- Sending cookies or cupcakes with the question written in icing
Here are some ideas for what to write in your bridesmaid proposal card:
- "It’s my turn to pop the question."
- "Help me keep my sh*t together."
- "I can’t say 'I do' without you."
- "My 'I do' would not be the same without you."
- "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue—and you."