How To Plan A Wedding On A Shoestring Budget

can t afford a wedding

Planning a wedding can be an exciting yet stressful time, especially when it comes to finances. The average cost of a wedding in the US is $27,000, with some sources citing $28,000 as the average cost in 2019. This is a significant amount of money, and it's no surprise that many couples find themselves unable to afford their dream wedding.

For some, the financial strain of planning a wedding can cause real distress, leading to difficult decisions and compromises. It can be hard to let go of long-held dreams and accept that disappointments happen. However, it's important to remember that a wedding is just one day, and it's possible to create a positive and memorable experience without breaking the bank.

There are ways to reduce costs, such as having a smaller guest list, choosing a low-cost venue, or opting for a more intimate celebration. With careful planning and prioritization, couples can still have a special day that reflects their love and commitment without incurring excessive debt.

Characteristics Values
Emotions Sadness, embarrassment, shame, anger, guilt, distress, jealousy, pride
Cost $27,000, $28,000, $100,000
Solutions DIY, eloping, small guest list, saving, cutting costs, getting a loan, crowd-sourcing, postponing

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DIY decorations and food

If you're looking to save money on your wedding, DIY decorations and food are a great way to go. Here are some ideas to get you started:

Decorations:

  • Picture-perfect centerpiecesFill painted lanterns with photos of the couple or throwbacks to their childhood.
  • Vintage family photo display: Put family wedding photos on display, perhaps affixed to teapot lids with artistic wire.
  • Perfume bottle flower centerpiece: Rinse out glass perfume vials with dish soap and mild vinegar, then add small, dainty flowers.
  • Make your own paper flowers: Create lovely little vase fillers using coffee filters and paint.
  • Wooden cocktail sign: Write the fixin's for a signature cocktail on a wood round.
  • Curtains hanging from the venue's natural architecture: Drape beautiful curtains along a tree or other structure to create a wedding arch for photos.
  • Tree branches with greenery: Create a naturalistic arch by using tree branches and enhancing them with flowers, greenery, and drapery.
  • Arches with twine: Personalize your arch with twine or garland, such as a beautiful macramé embellishment.
  • Hanging vases: Make your flower vases defy gravity by hanging them from strings of light.
  • Mr. & Mrs. chipboard signs: Use wooden Mr. and Mrs. signs at your rustic wedding to signify your official relationship.
  • Origami chair decor: Create origami decorations and tie them to various chairs along the aisle.
  • Floating flower vases: Fill a clear vase with water and allow flower heads to float on top for a stylized look.
  • Metal flower pails: Add baby's breath or a flower of your choice to metal pails and line the aisle with these creations for a vintage or rustic look.
  • Painted wooden ceremony reserved sign: Reserve seats down the aisle with a handmade sign featuring cursive writing, flowers, and ribbon.
  • Balloons: Balloon arches, walls, and oversized balloons are all fun and affordable ways to decorate your wedding.
  • String lights: Hang bistro lights or fairy lights to create a dreamy backdrop or light curtain.
  • Paper lanterns: Install paper lanterns on the ceiling to instantly transform your reception space.
  • Dried flowers: Dried flowers make a statement and require fewer stems overall, making them a budget-friendly option.
  • Candles: Candles of different heights, scattered across tables and adorned with flowers, can create a stunning and romantic display.
  • Table runners: Experiment with different types of table runners, such as gauzy fabrics, trails of moss and ivy, or eucalyptus and olive branches.
  • Bud vases: Cluster mismatched bud vases at the center of each table and fill them with single stems and greenery for a minimalist yet impactful centerpiece.
  • Potted plants: Prioritize flower arrangements for the main focal points, and decorate secondary spots with a collection of potted plants.
  • Greenery table runners: Decorate wooden tables with greenery runners instead of fabric linens for a stylish and casual look.
  • Custom signage: Design and print your own wedding signs, menus, place cards, and more.

Food:

  • Self-catering: Cooking the meal yourselves or ordering from a restaurant and setting out a buffet for your guests can be a great way to save money.
  • DIY wedding cake: Consider making your own wedding cake or opting for a homemade pie served with ice cream.
  • DIY wedding favours: Package a sweet treat, such as cookies or chocolates, in small, clear bags or jars with a personalized sticker.

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Prioritise what's important to you

It's easy to get carried away when planning a wedding, but it's important to remember that the day is about celebrating your love and commitment to your partner. With that in mind, here are some ways to prioritise what's important to you while keeping costs down:

Reflect and Accept

It's normal to feel a mix of emotions when you can't afford your dream wedding. Be honest with yourself and your partner about what's causing these feelings – whether it's jealousy, embarrassment, or anger. Accept that it's okay to feel disappointed and that everyone has a different budget. Remember, many people have thought about their dream wedding for years, so it can be tough to adjust expectations.

Reframe

Weddings today are much more expensive than they used to be, with the average cost in the United States being around $27,000 to $28,000. It's important to keep things in perspective and remember that only a small number of people can afford the types of weddings we see in magazines and on Instagram.

Prioritise

Now it's time to discuss with your partner what is truly important to you both. Make a list of your wedding wishes, and then rewrite it in order of priority. Be brutal and ask yourselves tough questions. For example, is a designer dress more important than having a photographer for the whole day? As you go through this process, you'll begin to see your most important wishes emerge.

  • Things that have meaning for the couple (individually or together)
  • Things that honour family or cultural traditions
  • Things that improve the guest experience (such as food, entertainment, and wedding favours)
  • Things that will enhance your photographs (decorations, flowers, table settings, etc.)

Keep It Simple

Remember, all you need for a wedding is a valid marriage license, a witness or two, and an officiant. Everything else is optional! If you're on a tight budget, consider asking a friend or relative to get ordained online and officiate your wedding. You can also save money by choosing a free or low-cost venue, such as a friend's backyard or a public park.

Focus on the Important Things

As you plan your wedding, keep the focus on what's truly important to you and your partner. This might include saying your vows in a specific location, having a particular song for your first dance, or including cultural traditions that are meaningful to you.

By prioritising what's important and making some creative choices, you can have a beautiful and memorable wedding without breaking the bank.

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Ask for help from friends and family

If you're struggling to afford your wedding, asking for help from friends and family can be a great way to save money and create a real community feel to your wedding planning. It can be tricky to know how to ask for help, especially if you're not usually comfortable doing so, but it's important to remember that your loved ones will likely be happy to help out and may even feel honoured that you thought of them. Here are some tips to guide you through the process:

Identify the Talents of Your Friends and Family

First, make a list of the people in your life who could help with your wedding and their specific talents or skills. For example, do you have a friend who is a great baker or a cousin who is a musician? Think about how their talents could be utilised for your big day.

Reach Out and Ask for Help

Once you've identified the people you'd like to help, simply ask them! You can do this in person, over the phone, or even via a social media post if that feels more comfortable. Be honest and explain that you're trying to keep costs down and would appreciate their help. Most people will be flattered that you thought of them and will be happy to lend a hand.

Make it Fun

If you're asking friends and family to help with tasks like decorating the venue or assembling favours, try to make it a fun gathering rather than a chore. Invite them over for a night of wine and wedding crafting, or turn it into a party! This will make it more enjoyable for everyone involved.

Be Flexible and Grateful

Remember that your friends and family are doing you a favour, so be flexible and grateful for their time and talents. Don't force anyone to help if they don't want to or can't commit, and be sure to express your appreciation. A simple "thank you" goes a long way, but you could also consider giving them a small gift or token of your gratitude.

Set Clear Expectations

It's important to set clear expectations upfront when asking for help. Be clear about what tasks or responsibilities you need help with, and don't be afraid to draw up a simple agreement or contract if necessary. This will help ensure that everyone is on the same page and avoid any misunderstandings or last-minute stress.

Know the Quality of Work

Just because someone is offering to help for free doesn't mean you should settle for less than your vision. Make sure the quality of their work meets your standards for your wedding day. If it doesn't quite fit, don't be afraid to politely decline and explore other options.

Remember, your friends and family want to see you happy, so don't be afraid to ask for help. By utilising their talents and keeping an open line of communication, you can create a beautiful wedding while also saving money and strengthening your bonds with your loved ones.

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Choose a low-cost venue

The venue is often the most expensive part of a wedding, but there are plenty of low-cost options available. Here are some ideas for cheap venues to help you celebrate your big day without breaking the bank:

National Parks, City Halls, and Public Spaces

Public spaces like national parks, city halls, and community centres can be a scenic yet affordable option for your wedding. Many national and state parks offer special use permits for a fraction of the cost of private venues, allowing you to tie the knot surrounded by nature. City halls are another budget-friendly option, with some offering stunning historic buildings for a small fee.

Your Own Backyard

Hosting your wedding at your home or the home of a friend or family member can be a cosy and intimate option. While you'll need to consider the cost of renting tables, chairs, and other items, you'll still likely save money compared to a traditional venue.

Airbnb or Hotel Rentals

If you're looking for a private and intimate setting, consider renting an Airbnb or hotel suite for your big day. Airbnb offers a variety of unique spaces, from cabins to beach houses, that can accommodate your wedding. Hotel suites can also be a great option, especially if you're looking for a small ceremony and celebration.

Libraries and Museums

Surround yourself with books, art, or artefacts by choosing a library or museum as your wedding venue. These spaces often feature dramatic architecture and can provide a striking backdrop, saving you money on decorations.

Restaurants, Cafes, and Bars

Renting out a private dining room at a restaurant, cafe, or bar can be a surprisingly affordable option. Full-service establishments will have food, tables, chairs, dishes, and utensils included, saving you money on hiring external vendors.

Remember, your wedding venue doesn't have to break the bank. With a little creativity and flexibility, you can find a venue that fits your budget and still creates a memorable celebration.

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Keep the guest list small

Keeping the guest list small is one of the most effective ways to cut costs when planning a wedding. Here are some tips to help you keep your guest list small and manageable:

Limit Plus-Ones

Allowing guests to bring a plus-one can quickly increase your guest list. To keep numbers down, limit plus-ones to only those guests who are in long-term relationships. This is a common method to keep weddings small and costs low. Be prepared for potential pushback and kindly explain your reasoning to any guests who ask.

Make it Adults-Only

If you don't have children in your family or life that you're very close to, consider making your wedding kid-free. While some venues and caterers offer kids' food and drinks at a reduced rate, children still add to your final headcount and can make a significant difference for large families. If you feel bad about implementing this rule, you can invite kids to your engagement party or rehearsal dinner, or organise a babysitter during the wedding.

Only Invite Immediate Family

Many couples invite their immediate family as well as much of their extended family. If you come from a large family and want to keep your wedding small, consider cutting off the guest list after first aunts, uncles, and cousins. If you're going for a very small wedding, keep it to your parents, siblings, and grandparents.

Keep it to Close Friends

When it comes to friends, only invite those with whom you have a strong, current relationship. Co-workers, old acquaintances, and friends-of-friends don't need to be on your list. You might feel obligated to invite an old friend because you attended their wedding, but don't feel pressured to do so if you've since lost touch. If you're unsure, ask yourself two questions: Will not inviting them negatively impact your friendship? Do you care? If the answer to both is no, then you don't need to invite them.

Keep the Final List Private

Once you've finalised your guest list, keep it between you and your partner. Sharing it with family and friends may lead to pressure to invite more people, especially if your list is small. If you do show your list to others, set boundaries and let them know that your list is final. An exception to this is if your parents or in-laws are contributing financially to the wedding, in which case you could allow them to invite a certain number of people.

Don't Feel Obligated

Remember, you're not obligated to invite anyone to your wedding. If you're not thrilled at the thought of someone being part of your wedding day, they don't need to be there. Chances are, if you're not close, they won't be too offended by not receiving an invitation.

Frequently asked questions

You could postpone the wedding to save up, or have a small ceremony and reception within your means.

You could keep the guest list small, use non-traditional venues, and DIY certain aspects of the wedding.

You could get married in someone's backyard, a community centre, or a restaurant.

You could have a potluck, serve cake and punch, or have a small wedding breakfast.

You could buy a second-hand dress, or shop at bridal consignment stores.

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