How Our Son Can Officiate Our Wedding

Having a family member officiate a wedding is a great way to make the celebration extremely personal. In fact, it is becoming an increasingly popular choice for couples. While some people may prefer to stick with tradition and have a religious leader or ordained officiant, others may want to make it more intimate by having a parent, grandparent, sibling, or close friend preside over the ceremony. In some places, like Pennsylvania, couples can obtain a self-uniting marriage license, which allows someone who is not recognised as a religious or state official to officiate the wedding. However, it is important to note that the laws regarding this vary by state and county, with some states clearly not recognising marriages performed by someone ordained online. Therefore, it is crucial to check the local requirements and ensure that all necessary steps are taken to ensure the marriage is legally valid.

The legalities of having your son officiate your wedding

The laws and requirements for officiating a wedding vary across different states and countries. In some places, like Wisconsin, children as young as 14 or 15 can legally officiate a wedding. However, a bill has been introduced to set a minimum age of 18 for wedding officiants in the state.

In other locations, like Pennsylvania, there is no need for a family member to get ordained online to officiate a wedding. Instead, couples can request a self-uniting marriage license when applying for a marriage license at the Department of Court Records. This type of license is legally binding and valid in all counties within the state. After the wedding, the couple must file the paperwork within a specified time frame, typically around 10 days.

It is important to note that the requirements for officiating a wedding may differ based on location, so it is essential to check the specific laws and regulations in your state or country. Additionally, some counties or states may have special requirements, such as the need for the officiant to get deputized. Therefore, it is recommended to contact the local clerk's office to ensure compliance with all legal requirements.

While having a son officiate his parent's wedding can add a personal touch to the ceremony, it is crucial to be aware of and adhere to the legalities involved. By understanding the specific requirements, couples can ensure that their wedding is both meaningful and legally recognized.

How to include your son in the ceremony

Including your son in your wedding ceremony by having him officiate can be a wonderful way to make your celebration extra special and personal. Here are some tips on how to include your son in the ceremony:

• Check Local Laws and Requirements: Before making any plans, be sure to research the laws and requirements for wedding officiants in your state or country. Some places may have specific rules or restrictions, such as minimum age requirements for officiants. For example, in Wisconsin, children as young as 14 or 15 can legally perform weddings due to online ordinations. However, this may change soon as there is a bill to set the minimum age to 18.
• Obtain the Necessary Credentials: If required by your local laws, help your son obtain the necessary credentials to officiate your wedding. This may include getting ordained online through websites like Universal Life Church, which offer free ordination that takes less than a minute.
• Involve Your Son in the Ceremony Planning: Include your son in the process of creating the ceremony script. This will make him feel more involved and allow him to add his personal touches to the ceremony. You can also leave some blank pages or spaces in the script for him to add his own thoughts and ideas.
• Prepare Any Necessary Paperwork: After the wedding, don't forget to file the necessary paperwork to ensure your marriage is legally recognized. In some places, like Pennsylvania, you may need to obtain a self-uniting marriage license when applying for a marriage license. This type of license requires the signatures of two witnesses instead of an officiant's signature.
• Consider Your Son's Comfort Level: Make sure your son is comfortable with public speaking and that he is honoured to take on this role. It's important that he feels confident and excited about officiating your wedding.
• Include Other Family Members: If you want to include other family members, such as your son's grandparents or other siblings, you can incorporate them into the ceremony as well. They can participate in readings, walk you down the aisle, or even co-officiate the wedding with your son.
• Add Personal Touches: Encourage your son to add his own personal touches to the ceremony. This can include sharing stories, anecdotes, or special messages during the ceremony. This will make the event even more memorable and meaningful.
• Rehearse and Practice: Finally, ensure that your son feels prepared and ready for the big day by rehearsing and practicing the ceremony with him. This will help him feel more confident and comfortable with his role.

Remember to adapt these suggestions to fit your unique family dynamics and the style of your wedding. Including your son in the ceremony is a beautiful way to make your wedding day even more special and memorable for everyone involved.

The pros and cons of having your son officiate

Having your son officiate your wedding can be a wonderful way to make your special day more intimate and personal. Here are some pros and cons to consider when making your decision:

Pros:

• It can add a special, intimate touch to your wedding ceremony to have it officiated by someone who is close to you and knows you and your partner well.
• It can be an honour for your son and a way to give him a special role in one of the most important days of your life.
• It can be a cost-effective option, as hiring an officiant can be expensive.
• If your son has good public speaking skills, it can be a smooth and memorable experience for all involved.

Cons:

• There is a risk that your son might back out at the last minute or that you might change your mind, which could be difficult to navigate.
• Depending on his age and the legal requirements of your location, he may not be eligible to officiate.
• If your son is not comfortable with public speaking, he may find the experience stressful.
• There is a chance that your son might become too emotional during the ceremony, which could impact his ability to officiate.
• It may require more work for you and your partner, as you will need to handle the legal and logistical aspects of the ceremony.

Ultimately, the decision to have your son officiate your wedding depends on your personal preferences and the dynamics of your family. While it can be a unique and meaningful experience, it is essential to consider the potential challenges and ensure that your son is comfortable with the responsibility.

Whether your son needs to be ordained

Location

The requirements for wedding officiants vary depending on your location. In some places, like Pennsylvania, you can obtain a self-uniting marriage license, which allows someone who is not a religious or state official to officiate your wedding. This type of license is legally binding and valid in all counties within the state. However, it may cost more than a traditional license in certain counties. On the other hand, some states, like Wisconsin, currently allow even children to legally perform weddings due to online ordination programs. Therefore, it's important to research the specific laws and requirements of your location.

Type of Ceremony

If you are planning a religious ceremony, your son may need to be ordained by a recognized religious organization. On the other hand, if you are having a secular ceremony, your son may not need to be ordained at all. In some cases, you may be able to have a friend or family member officiate without any official designation. However, it's important to check with your local laws and regulations to ensure that your marriage will be legally recognized.

Other Considerations

When deciding whether to have your son officiate your wedding, there are a few other things to keep in mind. First, consider your son's comfort level with public speaking. It is essential that the officiant is able to speak clearly and confidently in front of a group. Additionally, ensure that your son is reliable and will not back out at the last minute. Finally, don't forget about the additional work involved in having a family member officiate. After the wedding, it is the couple's responsibility to file the necessary paperwork, which must be completed within a certain timeframe.

In conclusion, whether your son needs to be ordained depends on your location and the type of wedding ceremony you plan to have. Be sure to research the specific laws and requirements of your location, and consider your son's comfort level with public speaking and reliability. By carefully considering these factors, you can ensure that your son's involvement in your special day goes smoothly.

How to get a self-uniting marriage license

A self-uniting marriage, also known as a Quaker wedding, is a ceremony where no officiant is needed to marry two people. The requirements for a self-uniting marriage license vary depending on the state. For example, in Pennsylvania, you need the couple, two witnesses, a marriage license, and a Quaker/self-uniting license or certificate. The marriage license costs $90, and the Quaker/self-uniting license costs an additional $100. These can be obtained through the City of Philadelphia Office of Wills. You will also need a self-uniting certificate declaring your intention to be married. The Philadelphia Yearly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends offers the traditional language for this, but couples can modify and customize the certificate. Once you have the license and certificate, gather all the parties to sign the certificate in a ceremony of your choosing, and you're married!

If you are getting married in Colorado, you must obtain the self-uniting marriage license in Colorado, even if you live in another state. There is no waiting period after getting the license, and it must be filed within 30 days. The cost of the license is $30.

Frequently asked questions