Wedding vows are a pivotal part of a wedding ceremony, and many couples choose to personalise theirs. While some couples opt for traditional vows, others decide to write their own, allowing them to include references to TV duos, inside jokes, or anything else that reflects their relationship.
What You'll Learn
Humour and sentimentality in wedding vows
Wedding vows are some of the most important promises you and your partner will ever make to each other. They are also a reflection of the nature of your relationship. While there is a lot of romance and love in any good relationship, there is also a lot of humour and laughter. Adding a touch of humour to your vows can help lighten the mood and ease any nerves you or your partner may be feeling.
Tips for Adding Humour to Your Wedding Vows:
- Keep it light and simple: Remember the occasion and keep your vows aligned with the focus of the day – committing yourself to your partner in front of your loved ones. Avoid workshopping your Netflix comedy special!
- Avoid inside jokes: Inside jokes between you and your partner may confuse your guests and may not be relevant to you both in a few years.
- Stay true to your personality: If you're the entertainer in your family, embrace your playful personality and write vows that sound like you.
- Include cute nicknames: Using nicknames is a cute way to add light-hearted meaning to your vows, but be sure to stick with names you wouldn't be embarrassed to say in front of your guests!
- Embrace humour as a theme: If your fiancé has a great sense of humour, sprinkle some of your own into your vows when you touch on this theme.
- Don't swim in the shallow end: Avoid gimmicky one-liners that tend to only work in movies. Instead, stick to more meaningful promises and sprinkle humour into your vows with more depth.
TV and Movie References for Humorous Wedding Vows:
If you're looking for inspiration, why not take cues from your favourite on-screen couples? Here are some examples of funny lines from TV and movies that will make you laugh:
- "I promise to never watch the next episode on Netflix without you, no matter how much I want to." – Various sources
- "I promise to pause the TV when you want to talk the entire way through." – Hitched
- "I promise to love you through Ikea, be it during the buying or assembly of furniture procured therein." – Brides
- "I promise to always support your dreams, even the one about [insert far-fetched dream]." – Hitched
- "I promise to always let you try my food, even when I've told you to order your own." – Hitched
- "I promise to take as many Instagram-worthy pictures of you as you want in public, no matter how many people are standing around us." – Hitched
- "I promise to always wash up when you cook the dinner." – Brides
- "I promise to agree that you really are the best driver on the road and always know exactly where you’re going, even when you don't." – Hitched
- "I promise to love you even as you scroll endlessly through Netflix without actually picking something to watch." – Hitched
- "I promise to never steal the covers." – Hitched
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The structure of wedding vows
There are many ways to structure your wedding vows, and you can certainly take inspiration from your favourite TV duo. Here is a suggested structure for your wedding vows:
Step 1: Start by Setting the Scene
Begin by addressing your partner by name and explaining how you are feeling in the present moment. You can also share a brief story about how you met or a significant moment in your relationship.
Step 2: Communicate What You Love About Your Partner
In this section, list the qualities you admire in your partner. Think about what makes them unique, what inspires you about them, and what you are most grateful for.
Step 3: Describe What You Love About Your Relationship
Explain what you appreciate about your relationship. Do you share a special connection, a sense of humour, or a passion for adventure? Write a few sentences about why your relationship is special to you.
Step 4: List Specific Promises
Promises are an essential part of your wedding vows. Include three to six specific promises that are sincere and can stand the test of time. You can also add one or two playful and humorous promises to lighten the mood.
Step 5: Describe Your Vision for Marriage
Share how you envision your marriage. How will you support each other and remain close through challenges? What shared dreams do you have for the future?
Step 6: Close with a Loving Last Line
End your vows with a heartfelt declaration of love. Some examples include: "To my soul mate, partner for life, and now my wife/husband. I will always love you." or "I love you to the moon and back."
Remember, you can personalise your vows to include references to your favourite TV duo or any other meaningful elements that reflect your relationship.
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How to deliver wedding vows
Writing your own wedding vows is undeniably touching. It gives you the opportunity to create promises that resonate with you, vocalize your love and hopes in front of your friends and family, and provide a deeper look at your love story. Here are some tips on how to deliver wedding vows:
Start Well in Advance
Throughout your wedding planning journey, keep your personalized wedding vows in mind. Think about which stories you'll want to share and promises you'll want to make. Make sure you have a final copy at least three weeks before your big day.
Discuss Your Expectations
Before jotting down your wedding vows, make sure to consult your partner about your expectations. Plan to come to a consensus about the length of your vows, when you'll recite them, who will say them first, the tone, and how personal you intend to make them.
Jot Your Thoughts Down
To jumpstart the writing process, start by jotting down all of the thoughts that come to mind about your partner and relationship. Beginning with a brain dump will allow your feelings to flow freely, while alleviating any pressure to nail the wording right away. After you get everything on paper, highlight your favorite items and use them in the final copy.
Write No More Than Three Drafts
Writing a few drafts is important, but continuously editing your wedding vows will only backfire. Take a few days—even a week—between edits, so you can revisit your words with more clarity.
Add Only the Important Details
Since you've likely been with your partner for years, you might feel tempted to include everything you've done and every moment you've shared together. Instead of adding an overwhelming amount of information, pick the most important details, such as the first time you met or when you said "I love you."
Avoid Absolute Words
When making promises, avoid using absolute words like "always" and "never." Vowing to do something all of the time or never at all is a huge commitment that's impossible to live up to.
Embrace Sentimentality
There's no better time to be sentimental than your vow exchange. If the message feels true to you, don't worry about coming across as corny. If the words are heartfelt, then they're not cheesy.
Seek Inspiration from Pop Culture
Movies, TV shows, books, and songs are filled with eloquent words and messages that capture the experience of being in love. To express your feelings, consider quoting a passage from your favorite book or a line from your favorite film in your personalized wedding vows.
Make a Fresh Copy for the Ceremony
When you vocalize your vows at the altar, your guests will be able to see the medium that you're reading from. A scratched-out notepad might not be the best choice for your service. Instead, print a fresh copy or write them in a vow booklet.
Stash Them in a Safe Place
In the months and weeks leading up to your ceremony, store the physical copy of your handwritten wedding vows in a secret spot—far away from your future spouse's field of view. It will make the ceremony more impactful and emotional if you're hearing them for the first time.
Practice Makes Perfect
To give you the confidence to deliver your vows on the big day, practice reading your heartfelt promises aloud. This practice will also help you gauge whether your promises are clear and complete. Reading your vows out loud will help you catch spots where the grammar might be iffy or where you’re missing a word, as well as figure out if the structure is cohesive.
Indicate Pauses and Intonation
Since your vows are filled with meaning, speaking quickly and mumbling will detract from the moment and prevent your audience from engaging with the content. You’ll want to allow time to laugh or tear up without interrupting your flow. For the best comprehension and emotional reactions, take it slow and focus on breaks, pauses, and intonation.
Ask a Trusted Friend to Listen
To prepare for the actual vow exchange, ask a close friend who is a great sounding board (and a pro at keeping secrets) to listen as you rehearse. They can give you constructive criticism and help you improve your vows to make sure you really get that meaning across.
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Pop culture references in wedding vows
Movie References:
- "I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone" – The Lord of the Rings
- "After all this time?" "Always" – Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
- "When I see the way that mankind loves…you could search to the furthest reaches of the universe and never find anything more beautiful. So yes, I know that love is unconditional. But I also know that it can be unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable, and strangely easy to mistake for loathing" – Stardust
- "It seems to me that the best relationships, the ones that last, are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is…suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with" – The X-Files
- "You are my light. And it doesn't matter what happens in this life as long as you're with me" – Madea's Family Reunion
- "I, Bryan MacKenzie, take thee, Annie Banks, to be my wedded wife. To love and to comfort from this day forward" – Father of the Bride
- "I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes" – When Harry Met Sally
- "I promise to never forget that this is a once-in-a-lifetime love. And to always know in the deepest part of my soul that no matter what challenges might carry us apart, we will always find our way back to each other" – The Vow
- "I, Christina, take you, Craig, to be my best friend and my captain... to be your anchor and your sail... your starboard and your port" – Wedding Crashers
TV Show References:
- "I love you and I like you" – Parks and Recreation
- "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible" – When Harry Met Sally
- "I choose you" – Pokemon
- "When I'm around you, I kind of feel like I'm on drugs. Not that I do drugs. Unless you do drugs, in which case I do them all the time" – Scott Pilgrim
- "I, Monica, wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soulmate. Then three years ago, at another wedding, I turned to a friend for comfort. And instead, I found everything that I'd ever been looking for my whole life. And now here we are, with our future before us, and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soulmate, my friend. Unless you don't want to. You go!" – Friends
- "I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever had to do. But when I saw you walking down the aisle, I realized how simple it was. I love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with" – Friends
- "I guess I kind of hate most things, but I never really seem to hate you. So I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. Is that cool?" – Parks and Recreation
- "I vow to protect you from danger. And I don’t care if I have to fight an ultimate fighter, or a bear, or him (points to a random guest), or your mom. I would take them down. I’m getting mad right now even telling you. I wanna spend the rest of my life, every minute, with you, and I am the luckiest man in the galaxy" – Parks and Recreation
- "I, Edward Cullen, take you, Bella Swan, to have and to hold" – The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1
These references can add a touch of personality and fun to your wedding vows, reflecting your shared interests and passions. Feel free to incorporate your favourite pop culture moments to make your special day even more memorable!
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The length of wedding vows
Wedding vows are deeply personal, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. However, there are some guidelines to help you craft your vows. Firstly, it is essential to keep in mind the length of your vows, which ideally should be between 30 seconds to three minutes. This length allows for some personality and sentiment without being too long.
A good structure to follow is to start by expressing your admiration for your partner, followed by casting a vision for your future together. Include a story or two that illustrates your partnership, but avoid inside jokes that only you and your partner will understand. Make solid promises, including both the highs and lows of married life, and conclude with a reiteration of your most important points.
If you are struggling to keep your vows concise, consider exchanging letters or having a first-look moment before the ceremony to share additional thoughts and feelings. This will help to alleviate pre-wedding jitters and create special memories.
- "I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever had to do. But when I saw you walking down the aisle, I realized how simple it was. I love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with." - Friends
- "I love you because you're funny and you make me feel loved and you make me feel safe. And I will make you happy all the time." - How I Met Your Mother
- "I, Chandler, take you, Monica, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part." - Friends
- "I, Monica, take you, Chandler, to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part." - Friends
- "I, Craig, take you, Christina, to be my wife, my best friend, and my first mate. Through sickness and health, clear skies, and squalls." - Wedding Crashers
- "I, Christina, take you, Craig, to be my husband, my best friend, and my captain. To be your anchor and your sail, your starboard and your port." - Wedding Crashers
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Frequently asked questions
Yes, you can reference TV duos in your wedding vows. Many couples choose to include quotes or inspiration from their favourite on-screen couples.
Romantic references to TV duos in wedding vows include: "You are my moon and stars and I promise to always navigate our love back to each other" (inspired by *Game of Thrones*), or "You are my lobster" (inspired by *Friends*).
Funny references to TV duos in wedding vows could be: "I vow to be there for you, just as much as Joey is there for pizza" (inspired by *Friends*), or "I promise to always support you, even if we have to survive on a desert island together" (inspired by *Lost*).
To avoid being too cheesy, opt for subtle references that hold a deeper meaning for you and your partner. You could include an inside joke inspired by a TV duo, or a quote that represents your relationship.
Popular TV duos to reference include: *Friends* (Ross and Rachel, Monica and Chandler), *Gossip Girl* (Blair and Chuck), *Grey's Anatomy* (Meredith and Derek), *New Girl* (Cece and Schmidt), and *How I Met Your Mother* (Lily and Marshall).