A Dance To Remember: Our Wedding

Dancing at weddings is a fun and meaningful way to celebrate the newlyweds and create lasting memories. While some couples choose to forgo dancing altogether, for those who opt for it, there are several dances to consider, such as the first dance, parent dances, the anniversary dance, and the money dance. The first dance is a special moment for the couple, often done after the grand entrance or cake-cutting. It can be choreographed or improvised, with music selected based on personal preference or meaningful lyrics. Parent dances, such as the father-daughter and mother-son dances, follow, welcoming the couple into their new families. The wedding party and guests then join in, with the DJ or bandleader setting the mood. While not mandatory, dance lessons and choreography can add a unique touch to the celebration.

Choosing a song

There are a few things to consider when selecting your song. Firstly, the meaning behind the song. Is it a song that is special to you as a couple? Perhaps it is a song that was playing during your first date, or a song that has meaningful lyrics that resonate with you both.

You could also consider the pace of the song and the style of dance you wish to perform. A slow, soulful song will suit a gentle, romantic dance, while an upbeat tune will get your guests clapping along and might even encourage them to join you on the dance floor.

If you are planning a choreographed routine, you will need to ensure the song suits the style of dance you have chosen. For example, a waltz or foxtrot will require a particular tempo, whereas a freestyle dance will give you more flexibility.

• "At Last" by Etta James
• "Marry Me" by Train
• "The Way You Look Tonight" by Frank Sinatra or Michael Bublé
• "Come Away With Me" by Norah Jones
• "Perfect" by Ed Sheeran and Beyoncé
• "All of Me" by John Legend
• "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri
• "Lucky" by Jason Mraz

Dance lessons

Choosing a Song

Selecting a meaningful song is an important part of your dance preparation. Choose a song that holds a special memory or has meaningful lyrics for you as a couple. Consider songs with a slower tempo or ballads, which are popular choices for wedding dances. If you need help, dance instructors or choreographers can often assist with music selection.

Dance Styles

The dance style you choose will depend on the song and your skill level. Traditional first dance styles include "the sway," the Waltz, and the Foxtrot. You can also opt for a more elaborate, original choreographed dance. For a unique twist, some couples include a slow dance that transitions into a high-energy Bollywood or Bhangra performance with family and friends.

Timing and Practice

It's recommended to start dance lessons two to three months before the wedding to ensure you feel confident and comfortable with the choreography. Practice is crucial, even if you're not doing a complex routine. The more you practice, the more you'll be able to enjoy the moment and focus on your partner, rather than remembering the steps.

Group Lessons

Consider including group lessons for the wedding party or even all guests. This can be a fun way to bond and ensure everyone feels comfortable on the dance floor. Group lessons can be especially helpful if you want to include a full dance routine with the wedding entourage.

Remember, the most important thing is to enjoy the process and have fun! Dance lessons can be a wonderful way to create lasting memories and add a special touch to your wedding day.

Order of dances

The order of dances at a wedding reception is typically as follows:

• The Grand Entrance: The wedding party lines up (often in pairs) and enters the room while the DJ/emcee announces them by name. This is usually followed by the newlyweds' grand entrance to applause.
• The First Dance: The couple's first dance as newlyweds, which can be choreographed or improvised, depending on their preference and comfort level.
• Hora (for Jewish Couples): A lively circle dance that includes the couple and their parents being lifted up on chairs.
• Parent Dances: This includes the father-daughter dance and the mother-son dance. Sometimes, other special relatives, like grandparents or step-parents, may join in.
• Wedding Party Dances: The best man and maid of honour dance together first, followed by the rest of the wedding party.
• Dancing for All Guests: An experienced DJ or bandleader will be able to read the room and play a mix of fast and slow songs to get everyone on the dance floor.
• Anniversary Dance: All couples in the room are invited to the dance floor for a slow, romantic song. The DJ/emcee then asks couples to sit down based on how long they have been married, until the longest-married couple is left dancing, who may receive a round of applause.
• Bouquet Toss and Garter Toss & Dance: The bride tosses her bouquet to single ladies, and the groom removes and tosses the bride's garter to single men. The "winners" then dance together.
• Post-Cake Cutting Dancing: Couples may opt for a block of dancing after the cake-cutting, which can be geared towards younger guests with more modern songs.
• Money Dance or Other Cultural Dances: In many cultures, the money dance is a popular tradition where guests pay to dance with the couple or give them money directly.

The couple can also choose whether to have an upbeat or slower song to close out the evening.

Dance etiquette

Dancing at a wedding involves some etiquette. The order of dancing is typically arranged by the couple, but there are some traditional elements that are usually followed. Here is some dance etiquette to keep in mind for your wedding:

The Grand Entrance

The grand entrance is an important dance floor moment during the wedding reception. The wedding party lines up (often in pairs) and enters the room while the DJ/emcee announces them by name. The newlyweds are the last to enter, usually to great applause.

The First Dance

The first dance is a special moment as it's the first time the couple dances together as a married pair. It usually happens after the grand entrance or after the meal. The couple may have taken dance lessons or chosen to improvise, depending on their comfort level and style.

The Parent Dances

The parent dances, such as the father-daughter dance and mother-son dance, may take place at several points during the reception. Sometimes they occur immediately after the first dance, or they may take place after dinner, after toasts, or after cake cutting. The bride dances with her father, and the groom dances with his mother. Other special relatives, like grandparents or step-parents, may also be included.

The Wedding Party Dances

After the parent dances, the wedding party is invited to the dance floor. The best man and maid of honour traditionally dance together first, followed by the rest of the crew. If the parent dances are taking place after dinner, the couple may opt to skip this and invite all guests to the dance floor.

The Guest Dances

Once the wedding party has danced, the rest of the guests are invited to join. A good DJ or bandleader will be able to read the room and choose a mix of fast and slow songs to get everyone moving.

The Anniversary Dance

The anniversary dance is a tradition where all couples are invited to the dance floor while a slow, romantic song plays. The DJ or emcee then asks couples who have been married for less than a year to take a seat, continuing until the couple married the longest is left dancing.

The Bouquet and Garter Toss and Dance

Traditionally, the bride tosses her bouquet to single ladies, and the groom removes and tosses the bride's garter to single men. The "winners" then dance together. However, many couples choose to omit this tradition as it can be embarrassing and play into gender stereotypes.

The Money Dance

In many cultures, the money dance is a popular tradition. There are several ways to do this, such as guests paying to dance with the couple, but it always ends with the couple being given cash. This usually takes place towards the end of the reception.

Choosing Songs

It's important to choose meaningful songs for your wedding dances. Pick tunes that are special to you and your partner, or that have meaningful lyrics. Remember to keep them tasteful and appropriate for all guests.

Choreography

Consider whether you want to perform a choreographed routine. It can add a unique and memorable element to your wedding, but it's not obligatory. If you do choose to choreograph, it's recommended to start practising two to three months before the wedding.

Practising

Whether or not you choreograph, it's a good idea to practice dancing together before the wedding. This will help you feel more comfortable and confident on the day, so you can truly enjoy the moment.

Dance alternatives

Dancing at weddings is a fun tradition, but it's not for everyone. If you're looking for alternatives to the traditional wedding dance, here are some ideas to make your special day memorable and enjoyable for you and your guests:

Interactive Games and Activities:

• Lawn games like corn hole, giant Jenga, and giant connect four are crowd favourites and perfect for outdoor venues.
• The shoe game is a hilarious interactive game where the newlyweds answer questions by holding up their partner's shoe.
• Mad Libs, trivia, and "I Spy" games centred on the bride and groom are fun and engaging ways to celebrate the couple.
• Set up a projector and display fun games like Guitar Hero for guests to enjoy.
• A photo booth or selfie station is always a hit, providing endless entertainment and memorable souvenirs for guests.
• For a unique twist, provide each guest with a polaroid camera to capture candid moments, which can be kept as mementos or displayed on a DIY photo wall.

Entertainment:

• Live music, whether it's a laid-back acoustic set or a soulful jazz band, creates a wonderful ambiance and entertainment for guests.
• Hire a caricature artist or a card magician to mingle with guests and provide unique, personalised entertainment.
• A talented comedian, magician, illusionist, or hypnotist can offer a surprising and memorable performance that will leave your guests laughing.
• A casino-themed experience, such as blackjack or roulette, is a unique way to entertain guests, especially the grooms and groomsmen.

Food and Beverage Experiences:

• Enhance the dining experience with interactive food stations or unique food presentations, such as a hot dog cart or a mac and cheese waffle cone.
• Offer late-night bites like bacon egg and cheese sandwiches or loaded french fries to satisfy those midnight cravings.
• A champagne wall is a stylish way to welcome guests, and it can also double as an escort card display.
• A custom cocktail station allows guests to personalise their drinks, adding a special touch to the celebration.
• For a relaxed vibe, provide individual beer flights at each table, featuring local craft beers.

Sentimental Touches:

• A slideshow or portrait booth is a wonderful way to share your love story with guests and offer professional portraits as keepsakes.
• Instead of a traditional guest book, set up a video station where guests can record heartfelt messages and well-wishes for the newlyweds.
• Encourage guests to write advice or anecdotes for the couple, which can be placed inside a pinata to be opened on the night or saved for a future anniversary.

Remember, your wedding day is about celebrating your love and creating memories. Feel free to incorporate any of these alternatives or customise them to match your personality and interests. Whether you choose to dance or not, your guests will appreciate your unique touches and the opportunity to connect with you and each other.

Frequently asked questions