Who Should I Bring As A Plus-One?

Wedding guests often have important questions they are hesitant to ask the couple directly. A wedding website FAQ section is a great way to address these queries, from the schedule to the dress code. One question that may arise is whether guests can bring a plus one or a date. While it's nice to allow guests to bring someone, it can double the guest list size, which may not be feasible. It's best to be honest and clear, with a blanket rule for plus ones to avoid drama and hurt feelings. The invitation should be addressed correctly, with no ambiguity, and the RSVP card should also make it clear that plus ones aren't allowed.

Can I bring a plus one?

This is a delicate question, but an important one to address. It's best to be clear and consistent from the outset to avoid any confusion or hurt feelings. Here are some things to consider when addressing this question:

Be honest and direct

Explain to your guests that due to budget and space limitations, you cannot accommodate extra people at the wedding. Be polite yet firm, and indicate that only those listed on the invitation are invited. You can also mention that you have a strict guest list to stick to your budget.

Have a blanket rule

Generally, it's a good idea to have a consistent rule for plus ones to avoid any potential drama or hurt feelings. For example, you could decide that either every guest is allowed to bring a date, or no one is. Alternatively, you could set a rule such as "only guests who are married or cohabiting are allowed to bring their partner".

Address invitations correctly

When sending out invitations, make sure to word them clearly so there is no ambiguity. If a guest is allowed to bring a plus one, the invitation would typically read "Mr John Smith plus Guest". If plus ones are not allowed, simply write the guest's name, such as "Mr John Smith".

Make it clear on the RSVP card

The RSVP card is a useful tool for communicating the plus one rule. You can write your guest(s) names on the reply card yourself, leaving no room for them to add anyone else. You can also add a section specifying the number of seats reserved for them, such as "We have reserved _ seat(s) in your honour".

Add a FAQ on your wedding website

A wedding website is a great way to share vital information that won't fit on the invitation. Include an FAQ section to address the plus one question. For example:

> Q. Can I bring a date (plus one) to your wedding?

> A. Unfortunately, due to budget and space limitations, we cannot accommodate all of our lovely guests bringing a guest of their own. Therefore, we kindly request that guests do not bring a plus one unless they are specifically named on the invitation. Thank you for your understanding!

Stick to your rule

If you've decided on a "no plus ones" rule, be prepared for some guests to ask for an exception. It's okay to say no and stick to your rule, especially if you have space or budget constraints. Explain your reasoning and let them know that you'd be happy to celebrate with them after the wedding.

Remember, it's your wedding, and you want to create a comfortable and enjoyable experience for you and your guests. By being clear and direct about the plus one policy, you can avoid any confusion and ensure that your guests have a positive experience.

Can I bring my kids?

This is your wedding, and you can decide whether or not to invite children. It's absolutely acceptable to have an adults-only wedding, and you shouldn't be afraid to tell your guests about your decision. If you are inviting children, make sure you specify this on the invitation. If you are not inviting children, it's a good idea to include a note with your invitations stating that the wedding will be adults-only.

If you are inviting children, you will need to consider how to keep them entertained. You could set up a separate kids' room or area with toys, puzzles, colouring books, crayons, and printable wedding games. You could also provide a kids' menu with child-friendly food options.

If you are not inviting children, you may want to suggest babysitting services or local babysitting companies that parents could use.

What if my date has dietary restrictions?

It is important to ensure that your date with dietary restrictions feels accommodated and comfortable. Here are some steps you can take to ensure this:

Communicate with the Couple:

Firstly, communicate with the couple getting married. They will be able to provide you with information about the food options available and may be able to accommodate your date's dietary needs. Ask them about the menu and whether there will be vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free, or allergen-free options available.

Provide Information:

When you respond to the invitation, be sure to include details about your date's dietary restrictions. Many couples include a section on their RSVP cards or wedding websites for guests to indicate any dietary restrictions. If there is no designated section, you can add a note with the relevant information. You can also reach out to the couple directly via email or phone call to ensure they are aware of your date's needs.

Buffet-Style Meals:

If the wedding will have a buffet, your date may have more options to choose from. Encourage them to review the labels on the dishes to identify ingredients that may be problematic. They can also speak directly to the caterers, who may be able to provide additional information or suggestions.

Bring Your Own Options:

If your date feels more comfortable having their own food options, they can bring their own snacks or meals. This can be a good backup plan if they are unsure about the available options at the wedding.

Seated Meals:

If the wedding has a seated meal with pre-selected menu options, your date may need to make special arrangements. Communicate with the couple in advance so they can inform the caterers about any necessary accommodations.

Be Prepared:

Encourage your date to be prepared for various scenarios. They may want to bring their own snacks or meals, just in case. Additionally, they should be mindful of potential cross-contamination issues, especially if they have severe allergies.

Remember, communication is key. By providing information to the couple and being proactive, you can help ensure that your date's dietary restrictions are accommodated, and they can fully enjoy the wedding celebrations.

Can I bring my date to the rehearsal dinner?

The rehearsal dinner is a pre-wedding celebration that usually takes place the evening or afternoon before the wedding. It is traditionally hosted by the groom's parents, but modernly, it is often hosted by the couple themselves or both families. The guest list is usually limited to the couple's closest friends and family, and it is a great opportunity for the two families to meet and get to know each other in a more intimate setting.

Now, can you bring your date to the rehearsal dinner? Well, it depends. If your date is your spouse, fiancé(e), or significant other, then they should definitely be invited to the rehearsal dinner. In fact, it would be considered rude to not invite them. However, if your date is not someone with whom you share a serious relationship, then it is not necessary to bring them.

If you are unsure whether to invite your date, consider the formality of the event and the size of the guest list. Rehearsal dinners can range from small, exclusive dinners to larger, more casual events. If the dinner is more formal and limited to close friends and family, then it may be best to leave your date out. On the other hand, if the dinner is more casual and includes a larger group of people, then your date may be more likely to be included.

Ultimately, the decision of whether to bring your date to the rehearsal dinner depends on the nature of your relationship with them and the specifics of the event. It is important to consider the preferences of the couple, the available budget, and the venue size when making your decision.

Can my date be involved in wedding photos?

It is customary for the wedding party to be included in the wedding photos. This includes the couple's parents, bridesmaids, groomsmen, and other members of the wedding party. However, it is not necessary to include the plus-ones or dates of the wedding party in the formal wedding photos.

If the date of a groomsman or bridesmaid is unfamiliar with the other guests, it may be considerate to allow them to join the wedding party on the bus while photos are being taken. This is especially true if there is a long gap between the ceremony and reception or if the date would be left alone while their partner is in the wedding party.

Ultimately, the decision of who to include in wedding photos is up to the couple. If the couple does not wish to include the dates of the wedding party, it is important to communicate this clearly and provide alternative arrangements for the dates during the photo session.

Frequently asked questions