Hindu Wedding Customs: Sisters' Place, Viable Option?

Hindu weddings are steeped in rich traditions and customs that vary across regions. While there is no standard format, there are several rituals and ceremonies that are considered essential. One of the most significant aspects is the exchange of vows and the taking of seven steps around a sacred fire, known as 'saptapadi'. This ritual is considered the legal element of the wedding and is recognised by Indian law.

Hindu weddings are typically grand affairs, lasting up to five days, with numerous rituals and celebrations. The ceremonies often involve the bride's and groom's families and are viewed as a union not just of two individuals but of two families. The rituals and customs are deeply rooted in Hindu philosophy and spirituality, with each step carrying symbolic significance.

In terms of location, Hindu weddings usually take place at the bride's home or the wedding venue. There is no specific requirement for the wedding to be held at the sister's place, as the focus is generally on the bride's and groom's families and creating a sacred space for the rituals.

The Ganesh Puja, or the Mandap Muhurat & Pithi, is a ceremony that usually happens at home with only the couple, the bridal party and close relatives in attendance

The Ganesh Puja, or the Mandap Muhurat & Pithi, is a sacred ceremony that usually occurs at the beginning of a Hindu wedding, which can last up to five days. It is performed by a priest and attended only by the couple, the bridal party, and close relatives.

The ceremony involves invoking and praying to Lord Ganesh, the remover of obstacles and the god of wisdom and salvation, to bless the couple with a smooth and blessed journey and to remove any obstacles from the wedding ceremony. Lord Ganesh is worshipped before auspicious occasions in Hindu families, and it is believed that a traditional Hindu wedding is incomplete without the Ganesh Puja.

During the Ganesh Puja, the family asks for peace and harmony and seeks Lord Ganesh's blessings to mark the start of the marriage with good fortune. The ceremony is considered to prepare the couple for a new beginning, and it is an important rite of passage in the Hindu religion.

The Ganesh Puja is followed by other pre-wedding rituals and celebrations, such as the Mehndi/Mendhi ceremony and the Sangeet night, which is a joyous and vibrant celebration involving music, dance, and laughter. These rituals lead up to the grand wedding celebration, which is a colourful and elaborate event with many rituals and traditions.

The Mehndi ceremony involves the bride and her female friends and family members having intricate henna patterns drawn on their hands and feet

The Mehndi ceremony is one of the most important pre-wedding rituals in Hindu weddings. It involves the application of henna in intricate patterns on the hands and feet of the bride and her female friends and family members. The ceremony is usually held a day or two before the wedding and is hosted by the bride's family. It is traditionally a women-centric ceremony, with male family members joining later. The Mehndi ceremony is not just a Hindu tradition but is also observed by Indian Muslims.

The ceremony is steeped in tradition and symbolism. Mehndi is considered one of the sixteen adornments of the bride, and her beauty is believed to be incomplete without it. The darker the colour of the henna, the more the bride will be loved by her in-laws and spouse. Henna is also believed to have cooling properties that help calm the bride's nerves.

The Mehndi ceremony is a colourful and joyous event, often accompanied by singing and dancing. The bride usually wears light-coloured clothing, such as a light yellow or green lehenga or salwar kameez, and her hands and feet are adorned with intricate henna patterns. The groom may also have a small amount of henna applied in simple dots or designs. The ceremony is a festive occasion, with music, dancing, and bright, colourful decorations.

The Mehndi ceremony is a time for the bride to bond with her female friends and family and to celebrate the upcoming wedding. It is a fun and emotional ritual that beautifies and blesses the bride before her big day.

The Sangeet involves the introduction of the couple's families, mingling, a meal and dances or other performances

The sangeet is a pre-wedding ceremony, usually held one or two days before the wedding. It is a time for the couple's families to come together and celebrate the union of the couple and the joining of the two families. The sangeet involves music, dancing, food, and mingling.

The word 'sangeet' is derived from the Hindi word for 'sung together' and the ceremony is an opportunity for the couple's families to meet and mingle. The sangeet is often the first time the families meet, and it is a chance for them to get to know each other and celebrate together.

The sangeet is a vibrant and joyous occasion, with music and dancing at its heart. Family members and friends will often perform dances, and there may be a dance-off between the couple's families. The dances are usually Bollywood-style, with guests going all out to celebrate the couple. The sangeet is also an opportunity for the couple and their families to perform traditional folk songs and dances.

Food is another important element of the sangeet. Indian weddings are known for their delicious food, and the sangeet is no exception. Guests can expect an array of dishes, from savory chaats to sweet mango lassi. The bar will also be flowing, with unique cocktails and mocktails on offer.

The sangeet is a chance for the couple and their families to let loose and celebrate before the wedding. It is a time to connect, bond, and create lasting memories. The ceremony usually lasts for four to five hours, and it is an opportunity for the couple's families to come together and celebrate the start of a new journey.

The main wedding ceremony, cocktail hour and reception take place on the third day

Day Three: The Main Wedding Ceremony, Cocktail Hour, and Reception

The third day of Hindu wedding festivities is when the main wedding ceremony takes place, followed by a cocktail hour and reception to celebrate the newlyweds.

The ceremony begins with the groom's entrance, often on a white horse, accompanied by the beat of drums played by the guests. This is known as the baraat. After the groom's procession, the bride and groom exchange floral garlands, known as varmala, to wear during the ceremony.

Following this, the couple performs the saptapadi, or seven steps, around a sacred fire. This ritual is considered the legal element of the Hindu marriage ceremony. With each step, the couple makes a vow to each other, promising to establish a happy and prosperous relationship and household.

After the seven steps, the groom applies sindoor, a red or orange powder, to the bride's forehead, and ties a mangal sutra, a sacred necklace, around her neck. These rituals symbolise the bride's new status as a married woman.

The wedding ceremony is then followed by a cocktail hour and reception, marking the end of the three-day celebration. The reception is a big party with music, singing, and dancing. Guests may make speeches or perform dances or songs for the newlyweds. A final banquet is served, and guests dance the night away, often to a mix of Indian and Western music.

The Bidai is the final part of a Northern Indian Hindu wedding, where the bride is sent with her groom to start their new lives

The Bidai, also known as Vidaai, is the final ritual of a Northern Indian Hindu wedding. It is a highly emotional ceremony, marking the bride's departure from her family home and the beginning of her new life as a wife and daughter-in-law.

During the Bidai, the bride bids farewell to her family, who are often overwhelmed with emotion. The bride's father, in particular, plays a significant role in this ritual, as he walks his daughter to the exit, where her husband awaits. The father expresses his love and concern for his daughter and entrusts her care to the groom, asking him to forgive her mistakes and guide her through their marital journey.

Before crossing the threshold, the bride performs a ritual to show her gratitude and respect to her parents. She throws a handful of rice and coins over her head and into the house, symbolising repayment for all that her parents have given her over the years. This ritual also ensures that her family will continue to enjoy wealth and prosperity after her departure.

The bride's female friends and relatives may playfully try to prevent her from leaving, but the groomsmen and male relatives eventually help the groom take his bride away. The couple steps into a car adorned for the occasion and drives away from the wedding venue, with the bride's brother and cousins pushing the vehicle to symbolise their acceptance of the union.

The Bidai is a bittersweet moment, filled with sadness as the bride leaves her family, but also with joy as she embarks on a new chapter of her life with her husband. It is a powerful and memorable ritual that signifies the end of one phase of the bride's life and the beginning of a new one.

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