Mother Of The Groom: Can She Host A Wedding Shower?

Wedding showers are traditionally hosted by the maid of honour or the bride's family. However, modern wedding etiquette has loosened, and it is now common for the groom's family to be more involved. While some sources still consider it poor form for a family member to host a wedding shower, others, including Martha Stewart Etiquette Advisor, deem it perfectly acceptable. Wedding planner Jesse Tombs suggests that the groom's mother can co-host the bridal shower, especially if she is very close with the bride.

The groom's mother can co-host the wedding shower

The groom's mother can absolutely co-host the wedding shower. Traditionally, it was considered poor form for family members of either the bride or the groom to host a bridal shower. However, lifestyles and trends have changed, and so have the corresponding protocols. The groom's family can now be much more involved in the wedding shower.

According to Sharon Naylor, author of Mother of the Groom, the groom's mother "may get to co-host bridal showers with bridesmaids". This is also confirmed by wedding etiquette expert Emily Post, who states that "the traditional hosts are friends of the bride, the couple, or their parents".

If the groom's mother is co-hosting the wedding shower, there should be room on the guest list to include her sisters, aunts, and cousins. It is also important to remember that, regardless of who is hosting, it is considered poor etiquette to invite someone to the wedding shower who is not invited to the wedding.

If the groom's mother is very close with the bride, she may feel it is her duty to pitch in with the planning. If the bride is on board with the idea of a co-host, then this is an entirely acceptable route to take.

The groom's mother can provide the venue for the wedding shower

While the mother of the groom is not the traditional host for a wedding shower, there are many ways she can be involved. One of the most significant ways she can contribute is by providing the venue. This is a great option if the groom's mother is in a position to do so, as it is often a large expense.

The bridal shower is an occasion when family and friends of the bride gather to celebrate the upcoming wedding. It is usually hosted by the mother of the bride or the maid of honour, but there are no hard and fast rules. In fact, wedding planner Jesse Tombs notes that "every situation is different".

If the groom's mother is offering to provide the venue, it is a wonderful opportunity to get more involved in the planning process and lay the foundation for a good relationship with the bride's family. It is a chance to be generous and gracious, and to make the bride feel special.

However, it is important to remember that the bridal shower is about the bride, and her preferences and comfort should be considered. If the groom's mother is very close with the bride, she may feel it is her duty to pitch in. In this case, the groom's mother can co-host the bridal shower with the bride's mother or the maid of honour.

If the groom's mother is providing the venue, it is still important to communicate with the official hostess to ensure that the bride's preferences are being met. The hostess will also need to be comfortable with the groom's mother's vision and budget.

Another option is to have the groom's mother act as a co-host without being named on the invitations. In this case, the groom's mother can provide the venue, food, and decorations, while a bridesmaid or another friend of the bride acts as the official hostess. This can be a good solution if there are concerns about proper etiquette, as it is generally considered poor form for a family member to host a gift-giving event for a relative.

The groom's mother can also offer to host a separate, more intimate gathering for the bride and her bridesmaids. This could be a bridesmaids tea luncheon or an Alice in Wonderland-themed party. This type of event is not a gift-giving occasion, so it is entirely appropriate for the groom's mother to host and can be a fun way for her to get to know the bride's friends better.

Whether the groom's mother is officially listed as a host or not, it is essential to communicate with the bride, the official hostess, and other key individuals to ensure that everyone is comfortable with the arrangements and that the bride's wishes are being respected.

The groom's mother can contribute financially to the wedding shower

While traditions and expectations around weddings have evolved, the bride's family is typically responsible for most of the fees associated with the wedding. However, the groom's family is expected to contribute financially in several ways, and there are opportunities for the groom's mother to contribute financially to the wedding shower.

Traditionally, the groom's family covers the cost of the marriage license, the groom's and groomsmen's attire, the rehearsal dinner, and the honeymoon. They also usually cover gifts for the groomsmen, personal flowers, the officiant's fee and lodging, and transportation for the wedding party.

The wedding shower, or bridal shower, is an occasion for family and friends to celebrate the upcoming wedding. While traditionally hosted by the bride's family or bridesmaids, modern etiquette allows for more flexibility, and the groom's family can now be involved. Wedding planner Jesse Tombs advises that the person hosting and paying for the event should make the final decisions, but there is room for the groom's mother to contribute financially. For example, if she has offered to pay for flowers, she can be connected with the hostess to discuss the vision and budget.

The groom's mother can also co-host the bridal shower, particularly if she has a close relationship with the bride. This is supported by several experts, including Sharon Naylor, author of "Mother of the Groom," who states that the groom's mother "may get to co-host bridal showers with bridesmaids."

If the groom's mother is not involved in hosting, she can still be offered a role in the event, such as providing flowers, overseeing the guest list or catering, or organising games or decorations.

Additionally, it is common to have two gatherings: one hosted by the bride's family or friends, and another hosted by the groom's family. This allows the groom's mother to host a separate shower, especially if there is a large distance between the two families, as long as it occurs after the main shower.

The groom's family can also contribute to other pre-wedding parties or celebrations. For example, the groom's parents can host the engagement party if the bride's parents do not wish to, or if they live closer to the couple.

The groom's mother can be involved in the planning process

Another option is for the groom's mother to co-host the bridal shower. Traditionally, the mother of the bride or the bride's closest friends host the shower. However, if the groom's mother is very close with the bride, she may want to pitch in as a co-host. This is an entirely acceptable option, provided that the bride's family or friends are on board with the idea.

If the groom's mother wants to be involved but prefers to take a step back from hosting or co-hosting, she can offer to take on a specific role or contribution for the shower. For example, she could oversee the flowers, catering, invite list, or games and decorations.

In some cases, it may be appropriate for the groom's mother to host a separate bridal shower, especially if there is a large distance between the bride's and groom's loved ones. It is important to first discuss this idea with the bride's family and ensure that the couple is on board. A separate bridal shower hosted by the groom's mother can be a wonderful opportunity for her to celebrate the couple with her friends and relatives, especially if they will not be able to attend the main shower or wedding.

While the groom's mother can certainly be involved in the planning process, it is essential to keep the bride's preferences at the forefront. The bridal shower is ultimately about celebrating the bride, so any decisions or contributions made by the groom's mother should consider the bride's wishes.

The groom's mother can host a separate wedding shower

While traditionally, it was considered poor form for family members of either the bride or the groom to host a bridal shower, lifestyles and trends have changed, and so have the corresponding protocols. Nowadays, it is perfectly acceptable for the groom's mother to host a separate wedding shower.

If the groom's mother is very close with the bride, she may feel it is her duty to pitch in with the planning. If the bride's mother or her friends are happy to have her as a co-host, then this is an entirely acceptable route.

If the bride's family and the groom's family live far apart, it may be a hassle to coordinate a joint wedding shower. In this case, it is a good idea for the groom's mother to discuss the idea of hosting a separate wedding shower with the bride's family first. This ensures that the couple's interests are kept at heart and that the purpose of the shower—for all the couple's loved ones to come together for a few hours of gift-giving, good food, and bonding—is not lost.

If the bride's family is happy for the groom's mother to host a separate wedding shower, she can include the groom's closest female relatives and friends of the family on the guest list. This is a great opportunity for both sides of the family to come together and get to know each other in a comfortable setting.

The groom's mother can also offer to take on a specific role in the bridal shower, such as providing flowers, overseeing the invite list or catering, or putting together a game or photo display for decorations.

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