Prostrate Or Not: Catholic Wedding Couple's Choice

If you're planning a Catholic wedding, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, the Catholic Church considers marriage a covenant by which a man and woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, and as such, it is a sacred ritual through which a sacrament takes place. This means that there are specific requirements that must be met for a Catholic wedding to be considered valid. These include the free exchange of consent between the spouses, the intention to marry for life and be faithful, and the presence of witnesses and a properly authorized church minister. Additionally, the ceremony must take place within a sacred space, typically a Catholic church, and certain documents such as proof of baptism, communion, and/or confirmation may be required. It's important to contact the church as early as possible and to go through the necessary marriage preparation process, which can vary depending on the diocese.

The Catholic Church considers marriage a sacrament

Marriage is a covenant by which a man and a woman establish a partnership of the whole of life, which is ordered by its nature to the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring. It is a sacred religious rite instituted by Christ, a sign of interior sanctification, and it confers Divine grace.

The Catholic Church recognizes as sacramental the marriages between two baptized non-Catholic Christians or between two baptized Orthodox Christians, as well as marriages between baptized non-Catholic Christians and Catholic Christians. In the latter case, consent from the diocesan bishop must be obtained, with this termed "dispensation to enter into a mixed marriage".

The Church teaches that marriage is not just for the good of individuals or the couple but for the community as a whole. The permanent and exclusive union between husband and wife mirrors the mutual commitment between God and His people. The Letter to the Ephesians says that this union is a symbol of the relationship between Christ and the Church.

The Catholic Church also has requirements for a marriage to be considered valid. These include that the spouses are free to marry, they freely exchange their consent, they intend to marry for life, to be faithful to one another, and be open to having children, and that their consent is given in the presence of two witnesses and before a properly authorized Church minister.

A Catholic wedding must take place in a church

A Catholic wedding is a sacred event, and the Church considers it a covenant with God. For this reason, the ceremony must take place in a church, specifically a Catholic church, to emphasise the sanctity of the occasion.

The Church teaches that marriage is not just a social or family event but a community event. The Catholic Church teaches that marriage is a sacrament, and sacraments make Christ present in the community. The permanent and exclusive union between husband and wife mirrors the relationship between Christ and the Church.

The Code of Canon Law states that "marriages are to be celebrated in a parish where either of the contracting parties has a domicile... With the permission of the proper ordinary or proper pastor, marriages can be celebrated elsewhere." While this may suggest that weddings can take place outside of a church, it is almost impossible to obtain such authorisation from a local bishop. Bishops are reluctant to grant this permission as they want to maintain a sense of the sacred, which is what happens at a Catholic wedding ceremony.

There are some unusual circumstances in which a bishop may permit a wedding to take place outside of a church. For example, if the church building has suffered structural damage due to a natural disaster. However, these circumstances are highly unusual.

The Church requires that couples wishing to marry go through an intensive marriage preparation process with a priest. This process includes an individual interview under oath, during which the priest confirms the couple's understanding of the four basic tenets of marriage: entering into it freely, permanence, exclusivity, and being open to having children.

The Church also prefers that marriages between Catholics, or between Catholics and other Christians, are celebrated in the parish church of one of the spouses. This is usually the local church of either the bride or the groom, which is why many couples opt for a church in their hometown.

The Catholic Church recognises non-Catholic marriages

The Catholic Church does recognise marriages outside of the Church, but there are some conditions. Marriages between non-Catholics, of whatever religion, are considered valid, but there is a distinction between natural (ordinary) marriage and supernatural (sacramental) marriage. Supernatural marriages exist only between baptised people, so marriages between two Jews or two Muslims are only natural marriages. Marriages between two Protestants or two Eastern Orthodox are supernatural (sacramental) marriages.

When one spouse is Catholic and the other is a non-Catholic, this is called a "mixed marriage". In this case, the Catholic must obtain a dispensation for the marriage, which would otherwise be blocked by the "mixed-marriage impediment" or "disparity of cult impediment". If either of these dispensations is not obtained, the marriage will be invalid. The priest must also receive a special dispensation, in writing, from the bishop. This is always given, as long as the Catholic has agreed to keep practising the Catholic faith and has promised to raise their children as Catholics.

The Catholic Church recognises as sacramental, marriages between two baptised non-Catholic Christians or between two baptised Orthodox Christians. It also recognises marriages between baptised non-Catholic Christians and Catholic Christians, although in the latter case, consent from the diocesan bishop must be obtained. This is called "dispensation to enter into a mixed marriage". The Church also recognises marriages between two non-Christians or those between a Catholic Christian and a non-Christian, but these are not considered to be sacramental. In the latter case, the Catholic Christian must seek permission from their bishop for the marriage to occur; this permission is known as "dispensation from disparity of cult".

Weddings in which both parties are Catholic faithful are ordinarily held in a Catholic church, while weddings in which one party is Catholic and the other is a non-Catholic can be held in a Catholic church or a non-Catholic church, but permission from the bishop is required for the marriage to be free of defect of form.

Marriage preparation is required

Initial Meeting with the Priest

The first step is for the couple to schedule an interview with the priest before Pre-Cana. This meeting serves as an opportunity to discuss the specific requirements of the parish, such as documents needed, scheduling sessions with the priest, and establishing logistics like possible dates and booking the church. It is important to note that the priest conducting the marriage preparation may be different from the one officiating the wedding due to schedule discrepancies, changes in assignments, or destination weddings. During this interview, interfaith marriages should also be disclosed, and the Catholic partner's obligation to raise any children in the Catholic faith should be clarified.

Prenuptial Investigation

Following the initial meeting, the couple undergoes a prenuptial investigation, which is an individual interview conducted by a priest under oath. This investigation aims to establish the couple's understanding of four basic tenets of marriage in the Catholic Church: entering into it freely, permanence, exclusivity, and being open to having children. As the Church views marriage as a permanent covenant with God, parishes are typically strict about remarriage, and this is where priests confirm that neither party has been previously married. If there is a history of marriage that did not end in annulment or the death of a spouse, some churches may not perform the ceremony. In such cases, the couple should discuss possible options with the priest, as certain legal steps may be required before proceeding.

Affidavits

In addition to the prenuptial investigation, the church requires affidavits from two individuals per sacrament to testify that the couple meets the four basic tenets of marriage. These affidavits are notarized documents that serve as confirmation of the church's findings.

Submission of Documents

The Catholic Church has specific requirements regarding proof of baptism, communion, and/or confirmation. Most churches keep records of participation in these sacraments, so couples can request copies from the respective churches. If obtaining copies is not possible, priests often allow affidavits from two witnesses per sacrament. These documents are typically compiled by the priest conducting the marriage preparation and sent to the parish where the wedding will be held about a month and a half before the wedding date.

Pre-Cana

After submitting the necessary documents, couples undergo Pre-Cana, the church's mandatory marriage-preparatory program. The specifics of Pre-Cana may vary depending on the diocese, but it generally includes multiple sessions with a priest, attendance at a conference or retreat, and/or more active involvement in church activities.

Counseling Sessions

The core component of Pre-Cana is counseling sessions with a priest, during which the couple is guided on the Church's teachings about marriage. These hour-long sessions also address current and potential issues in the relationship, such as financial management, navigating in-laws, social behaviors, and any other challenges that could impact faithfulness or the fulfillment of spousal roles. If the priest identifies any significant impediments to marriage or the spousal role, he may recommend counseling sessions with a psychologist before continuing with the marriage preparation process.

Diocesan Requirements

Different dioceses may have unique requirements for marriage preparation. For example, some dioceses mandate a minimum of four meetings with the priest, while others require attendance at a conference conducted or endorsed by the diocese. Some priests may also facilitate connections between engaged couples and married couples from the same parish to serve as mentors.

In summary, marriage preparation in the Catholic Church is a comprehensive process that involves both spiritual and logistical components. Couples are expected to meet with priests, undergo prenuptial investigations, submit necessary documents, and participate in Pre-Cana. The ultimate goal is to ensure that the couple is well-prepared for their married life together, both religiously and practically.

The Catholic Church has rules about remarriage

The Catholic Church has strict rules about remarriage. If a Catholic has been divorced, they are still considered married in church law and are not free to remarry in the Church. A divorced Catholic must seek an annulment before they can remarry. This is because the Church views marriage as a sacred covenant between God and the married couple.

The Catholic Church teaches that marriage is a sacrament, a sacred act that is not just for the good of the individuals or the couple but for the community as a whole. The permanent and exclusive union between husband and wife mirrors God's commitment to his people. Therefore, the Church views divorce as a grave offense against natural law, introducing disorder into the family and society.

To receive an annulment, a divorced Catholic must submit their prior marriage to the scrutiny of the Church. This process involves a confidential assessment of the couple's situation, including the events leading up to the wedding and the time immediately before and after. The Church will examine whether there was a serious defect of consent, such as marrying out of fear or coercion, or if there were wrong intentions or deep problems that prevented a valid marriage bond from forming.

If the Church grants an annulment, it declares the previous marriage null and void, freeing both parties to remarry. However, this process can be lengthy and may take up to 18 months to complete.

It is important to note that civil divorce and remarriage are not recognised by the Catholic Church. A Catholic who remarries outside the Church without first obtaining an annulment is considered to be in a state of adultery and is temporarily unworthy to receive the sacrament. To remedy this situation, they must refrain from receiving the sacraments and seek reconciliation through confession and commitment to live "as brother and sister".

Frequently asked questions