Etiquette Guide: Wedding Party Invitation Expectations

Sending out wedding invitations is an exciting part of the wedding planning process. It's also a chance to set the tone for the event and give your guests all the information they need. But what about the wedding party? Do they get an invite too?

While it may seem redundant to send invitations to your wedding party, it's actually a lovely gesture. They'll appreciate having a physical invitation as a keepsake, especially if it's beautifully designed. It's also a chance to ensure you have all their dietary requirements and guest information. Plus, it's a good way to make sure they have all the details they need, even if they're closely involved in the planning.

So, the short answer is yes, it's a good idea to send invitations to your wedding party. It's a formal event, after all, and a formal invitation is a nice touch.

Inviting the wedding party: a nice gesture and a keepsake

It is customary to send wedding invitations to the wedding party, including parents and attendants, even though they are closely involved in the planning and already know the date. Sending an invitation is a thoughtful gesture and a memento for them to remember the day. Brides often even send one to themselves to keep as a keepsake.

The wedding party will also need practical information such as timing, location, and travel arrangements, which can be included in the invitation suite. It is also useful to request an RSVP from the wedding party, including their dietary requirements and other relevant details.

The invitation suite can also include other important details such as the appropriate attire, a map to the event location, accommodation suggestions, and information about any wedding-related activities.

It is recommended to send invitations to your wedding party six to eight weeks in advance, and earlier if it is a destination wedding. This will give your wedding party plenty of time to prepare and make any necessary arrangements.

The design of your wedding invitations can be tailored to reflect the style and theme of your wedding, whether it is formal or casual. You may also choose to incorporate your wedding colours or design embellishments to tie the invitations into your wedding theme.

Wording and phrasing: formal or casual?

The wording and phrasing of your wedding invitations can be formal or casual, depending on the style of your wedding. Formal phrasing is appropriate for a traditional wedding ceremony followed by a formal reception, while casual phrasing is suitable for a more relaxed wedding.

Formal Wording and Phrasing:

• Include full names: those of the couple, and the hosts if formal phrasing is used.
• Write out the date, time, month, and year in full.
• Use social titles and full names when addressing the invitation envelopes.
• Spell out the time of day, e.g. "half after four o'clock".
• Use traditional phrasing for the request to attend, such as "request the honour/honor of your presence".
• Include middle names of the individuals getting married.
• Write out the street address of the venue, including the state and zip code.
• If the ceremony and reception are at the same venue, simply state "reception to follow".

Casual Wording and Phrasing:

• Use numerical figures for the date and time.
• Be more conversational in your request to attend, e.g. "invite you to share in their joy".
• Numbers should be used to convey the date and time.
• Keep the wording concise and straightforward.
• Feel free to explore modern and playful phrasing.

Regardless of the style you choose, there are some essential details that should be included in your wedding invitations:

• Full names of the couple.
• Time, date, month, and year of the wedding.
• Full address of the venue.
• Reception information, especially if it is at a different location.
• Dress code or attire suggestions (optional).
• RSVP details, including a response deadline.

What to include: who, when, and where

The wedding invitation is one of the most important details of your wedding. It announces your upcoming nuptials and sets the tone for the entire event. While the style of your invitation can range from formal to casual, there are some essential details that you should include: who, when, and where.

Who

The invitation should include the full names of you and your partner, as well as the full names of the hosts if you are using formal phrasing.

When

Clearly list the time, date, month, and year of the wedding. If your reception is at a different venue or starts at a different time, include this information as well. A good rule of thumb is to state a time that is at least 30 minutes to 45 minutes before you want the ceremony to begin. This gives guests time to arrive and be seated, and ensures that the ceremony can start on time.

Where

Don't forget to include the full address of the venue! If your reception is at a different location, you can include it on the invitation or print a separate reception card.

In addition to the basics, you may want to include other details in your invitation suite, such as:

• A map or directions to the venue
• Accommodation suggestions for out-of-town guests
• Attire suggestions
• Information about any wedding-related activities, such as a welcome dinner or post-wedding brunch
• An RSVP card with a deadline of about four weeks before the wedding

Additional details: attire, maps, accommodation, and activities

When it comes to wedding invitations, there are a few key details you should include to ensure your guests have all the information they need to plan and prepare for your big day. Here are some tips for including additional details about attire, maps, accommodation, and activities:

Attire

It is important to give your guests a heads-up about the appropriate attire for the wedding. You can include this information on a separate information or details card that accompanies the invitation. This way, your guests will know exactly what is expected of them in terms of dress code. Here are some examples of how to word the dress code:

• "Black tie"
• "Cocktail attire"
• "Formal attire"
• "Dress casual"

Maps

Providing a map or directions to the wedding venue is always a good idea. While most guests will use GPS or online maps, it's helpful to have a backup in case of phone issues or poor reception. You can include a custom weekend map or a direction card with clear and legible font. It's also a good idea to list the venue address and directions on your wedding website as another reference point.

Accommodation

If you have guests coming from out of town, it's considerate to provide them with accommodation options. You can include this information on the details card or your wedding website. Give the hotel recommendations, room block information, and transportation details. If there are special rates available, be sure to mention that as well.

Activities

If your wedding will include multiple events such as welcome drinks, an after-party, or a day-after brunch, it's helpful to include a full itinerary for your guests. This can be in the form of a weekend events card included with the invitation or on your wedding website. Provide guests with event details, transportation information, and any relevant timelines.

Remember, the key to successful wedding invitations is to provide your guests with all the essential information they need to plan and prepare for your big day. By including these additional details, you can ensure that your guests will be well-informed and ready to celebrate with you!

RSVP and deadline: allow enough time for a final headcount

When setting an RSVP deadline, it's important to give your guests enough time to respond, while also allowing for a final headcount for your vendors. Here are some tips to help you set an appropriate deadline:

Timing:

It's recommended to send out wedding invitations and RSVP cards between 3 and 6 months before the wedding. This gives guests enough time to make arrangements such as booking time off work and sorting out childcare. The RSVP deadline should then be set around 4 to 8 weeks before the wedding. This allows guests ample time to respond and gives you enough notice to finalise details such as the table plan and seating chart.

Vendor Requirements:

Caterers typically need the final headcount at least one week in advance, and sometimes up to a month before the wedding, especially if they need to cater to special dietary requirements. The venue also needs the final numbers in advance to plan the layout, staffing, and other logistics. Check with your caterer and venue to confirm their requirements and work backwards from there to set your RSVP deadline.

Guest List Management:

If you have a backup guest list (also known as a B-list), you'll need to factor in time to send out a second batch of invitations. Additionally, if you're inviting guests who need to travel a considerable distance, give them more time to RSVP—send invitations 6-12 months in advance and set the RSVP deadline at least 3 months before the wedding.

Communication:

It's inevitable that some guests will miss the RSVP deadline or forget to respond altogether. Build in some extra time to follow up with these guests via phone, email, or text. You may need to set a final warning deadline and assume that guests who don't respond by that time are unable to attend.

Other Considerations:

There may be other aspects of your wedding that depend on the final guest count, such as ordering wedding favours, centrepieces, or place cards. Factor in the time needed to finalise these details when setting your RSVP deadline.

Frequently asked questions