Whether a wedding is meant to be big or small depends on the couple's preferences, their budget, and the kind of experience they want to create.
Some people prefer a smaller, more intimate wedding with their closest friends and family, which makes planning easier and allows for more quality time with guests. On the other hand, a large wedding with a bigger guest list can be ideal for social butterflies and those with large families or friend groups, creating an instant party atmosphere and guaranteeing good vibes.
The size of the wedding also depends on practical considerations, such as budget and venue capacity. A larger wedding typically requires a bigger budget to accommodate more guests, while the venue's maximum capacity may dictate the guest list size.
Ultimately, the decision on whether to have a big or small wedding is a personal one, and there are benefits to both options.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Number of guests | Opinions vary, but weddings with more than 100 guests are generally considered big. |
Advantages | Big weddings are ideal for social people, those with large families, or those who want a grand celebration. |
Disadvantages | Big weddings can be more expensive and difficult to plan. |
What You'll Learn
Advantages of a big wedding
There are many advantages to having a big wedding. Here are some of the key benefits:
No Hurt Feelings
A larger wedding means you're less likely to disappoint people who aren't invited. With a bigger guest list, you can invite all your cousins, their partners, and their children, as well as friends and extended family. This can create wonderful memories and ensure that those you care about are part of your special day.
More Fun with Attire
With a larger wedding party, you have more opportunities to get creative with the attire. This could mean mix-and-match bridesmaids' dresses in a variety of shades or groomsmen in different suits and ties. It's a chance to have fun and make the wedding visually interesting.
Lots of Help
A bigger wedding party means more helping hands. You can delegate small tasks to your wedding party, like picking up relatives from the airport or assembling favours. It's important not to treat them as personal assistants, but their help can make the day less stressful.
Amazing Pre-Wedding Events
With a larger group, your pre-wedding events, like bachelor and bachelorette parties, are sure to be a blast. More people means more planning and attendance, creating a fun and festive atmosphere in the lead-up to the wedding.
Fabulous Venue and Decor
A bigger wedding often means a larger, more impressive venue. You can opt for a grand location with multiple celebration spaces, such as an outdoor area, an elegant banquet hall, and spaces for cocktail parties and after-parties. You can also go bigger and grander with your wedding decor, creating a dream wedding scene.
More Food Options
A larger wedding usually means a wider variety of food options. You can offer a diverse catering list with multiple cocktail stations, sit-down dinner choices, and impressive dessert options. This not only delights your guests but also creates jaw-dropping displays for your wedding photos and videos.
Quality Time with Loved Ones
A big wedding is a rare chance to gather all your loved ones in one place. In today's global society, friends and family are often spread across different states and countries. A wedding is an opportunity to bring everyone together and spend quality time with people you may not see often.
Keeping Family Traditions
A large wedding allows you to continue the treasured family tradition of a big, cultural celebration. It's a chance to uphold important rituals and create lasting memories with your extended family.
More Gifts
While it may sound shallow, a bigger wedding typically means more gifts. With a larger guest list, you're likely to receive a greater number of gifts, including monetary presents, which can help offset some of the wedding costs.
Memorable Photos
A bigger wedding party means unique photo opportunities. You can get creative with your wedding photographer and capture fun, candid shots of you and your crew, resulting in amazing memories to cherish for years to come.
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Advantages of a small wedding
While big weddings are often associated with more fun and festivity, smaller weddings have their own unique set of advantages. Firstly, small weddings tend to be more cost-effective. With a reduced number of guests, expenses such as food, alcohol, invitations, transportation, rentals, and decorations are significantly lowered. This budget flexibility allows couples to allocate funds to other aspects of the wedding, such as a dream photographer, a desired venue, or a luxurious honeymoon.
Secondly, small weddings offer a wider range of venue options. Couples are not restricted to traditional wedding venues and can explore unconventional locations such as favourite restaurants, backyards, or unique spaces that may not typically accommodate large gatherings. This provides an opportunity for a more personalised and intimate setting.
Thirdly, small weddings allow for a more curated and bespoke wedding design. With fewer guests, couples can allocate more resources towards their dream design elements, such as floral installations, stunning tablescapes, calligraphy signage, or customised cakes. Every detail can be tailored to the couple's style and preferences, creating a truly unique celebration.
Additionally, small weddings provide an opportunity to avoid overwhelming crowds. For introverted couples, a smaller guest list can reduce pressure and allow for more personal and intimate moments, such as exchanging vows or sharing a first dance, without the added stress of a large audience. Small weddings also facilitate quality time with guests, enabling richer conversations and more meaningful moments.
Lastly, small weddings often result in a smoother planning experience. Organising a wedding, especially a destination wedding, can be logistically challenging with a large number of guests. A smaller guest list simplifies travel arrangements, accommodation, and itinerary management, making the planning process less stressful and more enjoyable for the couple.
Small weddings offer a range of benefits, from cost savings to increased personalisation and a more relaxed atmosphere. They provide an opportunity for couples to create an intimate and memorable celebration that aligns with their unique vision and budget.
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How to cut down a guest list
The size of a wedding is subjective and depends on the couple's preferences, their social circle, and their budget. Some people consider weddings with over 100 guests to be big, while others believe that weddings with more than 200 guests are large. Regardless of the size, creating a guest list can be a complicated and overwhelming experience for couples. Here are some tips to help you cut down your guest list:
Pick Plus Ones Wisely
If your list is already over the limit, be selective about plus ones. You can eliminate them altogether or only allow them for those in long-term relationships. This can be a sensitive topic, but most guests will understand if you prioritise immediate family and very close friends.
Be Firm with Family
You don't need to invite relatives you haven't spoken to in years. Your wedding day is about you and your partner, not a family reunion. Try to make consistent rules for both sides of the family to avoid hurt feelings.
Consider a Child-Free Wedding
Respectfully specifying that your wedding is just for adults is another way to reduce numbers. This may be easier if you don't have children of your own and could allow parents to let their hair down without worrying about their kids.
Don't Feel Obliged to Return Invites
If you're inviting someone because they invited you to their wedding years ago, but the friendship has since fizzled out, you can cross them off. Chances are, they won't be expecting an invitation and won't be offended.
Cut Out Colleagues
Navigating office politics is tricky, but you don't need to invite colleagues you don't socialise with outside of work. You can make exceptions for close co-workers, but be consistent to avoid hurt feelings.
Ask for Help at Your Own Risk
While it's tempting to ask parents and friends for input, they may suggest additional guests, making the situation worse. If they are contributing financially, try to accommodate their wishes, but remember that it's your wedding, and you get to choose who to invite.
Be Realistic About Numbers
Be realistic about your guest numbers to avoid stress later on. Choose a number larger than your venue's capacity, and you'll be anxious every time you receive an RSVP. It's better to be honest about your limits upfront.
Determine Your VIP List
Start with the people you absolutely want at your wedding. These are the people you couldn't wait to tell about your engagement and those you regularly communicate with. Reach out to confirm their availability before adding additional guests.
Consider Your Relationship with Each Person
Ask yourself how close you are to each person on the list. Your final guest list should be a collection of people you are truly close to and who are important to you.
Give Each Contributing Party a Guest Count Limit
Typically, the couple provides 50% of the guest names, with each set of parents getting about 25% input each. You can adjust this to accommodate family size or base the percentage on who is contributing financially.
Remember, creating a guest list is a challenging task, and you may need to be flexible. Be sensitive and honest in your approach, and don't be afraid to set boundaries.
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The average number of wedding guests
In the United States, the average number of wedding guests also fluctuates. In 2023, the average wedding size was 115 guests, with 57% of couples inviting 101 or more guests. Interestingly, the average number of wedding guests varies by generation, with Gen Z couples having the largest guest lists, followed by Millennials, and then Gen X.
While there is no definitive answer to what constitutes a "big" wedding, some sources consider any wedding with over 100 guests to be a large wedding. Others suggest that a medium-sized wedding typically includes 50-150 guests, while a small wedding has 50 or fewer guests.
Ultimately, the number of guests a couple chooses to invite to their wedding will depend on various factors, including their budget, the size of their families and friend groups, and the desired wedding experience.
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The cost of big weddings
The cost of a wedding can be a huge financial burden, and the bigger the wedding, the bigger the bill. The national average cost of a wedding in 2023 was $35,000, a $5,000 increase from 2022. This amount does not include the engagement ring, which costs an average of $5,500.
The biggest chunk of the wedding budget is often the venue, with couples typically spending about 37% of their overall budget on this. Catering is another big-ticket item, taking up about 29% of the average wedding budget. The cost per guest has increased from $256 in 2022 to $304 in 2023.
Other significant expenses include live entertainment (12%), wedding bands (9%), photography (8%), alcohol (8%), flowers (8%), videography (7%), couples' attire (7%), a wedding planner (6%), event rentals (6%), lighting and decor (5%), a DJ (5%), guest entertainment (3%), transportation (3%), ceremony musicians (3%), hair and makeup (3%), stationery (2%), cake (2%), wedding favours and gifts (1%), and an officiant (1%).
The cost of a wedding can vary significantly depending on location, with the average cost in 2020 ranging from $20,000 in Arkansas to $30,000 in Massachusetts. The number of guests is another major factor in the overall cost, with a per-head cost for food and liquor.
While a big wedding can be a wonderful celebration, it comes with a hefty price tag. Couples need to carefully consider their budget and priorities to ensure they don't overspend.
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