Wedding Band First: A Symbol Of Commitment

There are various traditions and beliefs surrounding the wearing of wedding bands and engagement rings, and how they should be worn together. In Western cultures, it is customary to place an engagement ring on the ring finger of the left hand. This is based on the ancient Egyptian and Roman belief in the 'vein of love' that runs from the left ring finger to the heart. The wedding band is then placed on the same finger during the wedding ceremony, followed by the engagement ring on top. This symbolises the idea that the wedding band is closest to the heart, representing a bonded commitment between partners. However, there are no set rules for wearing these rings, and individuals may choose to wear them in a way that feels most comfortable and meaningful to them.

The 'vein of love' tradition

The vein of love, or "vena amoris" in Latin, is a traditional belief that a vein runs directly from the fourth finger of the left hand—the ring finger—to the heart. This belief has been cited in Western cultures as the reason why the engagement and/or wedding ring is placed on this finger.

The tradition is thought to have originated with the ancient Egyptians, who held that wearing a ring on the vein of love was a true expression of devotion and commitment, with the ring's proximity to the heart symbolising the strength of a couple's love. The tradition was later adopted by the ancient Greeks after Alexander the Great conquered Egypt in 332 BC, and it was also observed in early Rome, where the use of metal rings began to supersede the use of hemp, leather, bone, or ivory.

The earliest known occurrence of the phrase "vena amoris" is found in the work of Henry Swinburne, an English ecclesiastical lawyer, whose posthumously published 1686 treatise on marriage purports an Egyptian connection. However, no earlier mention of the vein can be found, and the circulatory system was unknown at the time. The choice of the left hand over the right also appears to be a cultural distinction, with both choices claiming a historical connection to the vein of love.

While the theory of the vein of love has been disproven by medical science, the tradition of wearing a wedding ring on the fourth finger of the left hand persists in many Western countries, including the United States, the United Kingdom, Canada, Mexico, South Africa, and many Asian countries.

Ancient Egyptian customs

The wedding band is often worn first, followed by the engagement ring, with both placed on the fourth finger of the left hand, known as the "ring finger". This tradition is believed to have originated from Ancient Egyptian customs and their belief in the "vena amoris", which translates to the "vein of love" in Latin.

The Ancient Egyptians held that the "vena amoris" ran directly from the ring finger on the left hand to the heart. This belief, though not scientifically accurate, has endured and is one of the primary reasons why wedding rings are worn on this finger today. The closer the ring is to the heart, the stronger the bond of love, according to Egyptian thought.

The circle symbolised eternity for the Egyptians, as it has no beginning or end, reflecting the shape of the sun and moon, objects of worship in ancient Egypt. The open space in the middle of the ring was also thought to represent a gateway to the unknown. The Egyptians were among the first known people to exchange wedding rings, made from woven reeds or leather, about 6,000 years ago.

The ouroboros ring, portraying a serpent swallowing its tail, is another ancient Egyptian symbol of eternity. The name means "tail devourer" in Greek. The circle was also a symbol of unity, wholeness, and timelessness, reflecting the infinite nature of a circle.

Modern traditions

There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to wearing your wedding band and engagement ring. It's up to you and your personal preference. You can follow traditions, old or new, or blaze a trail and start your own.

The most common way to wear your wedding and engagement rings is with the wedding band first, followed by the engagement ring. This is a tradition that stems from the ancient Egyptians, who believed in the 'vena amoris' or 'vein of love', which ran directly from the ring finger on the left hand to the heart. Wearing the wedding band closest to the heart symbolises your bonded commitment to your partner. During the wedding ceremony, it is common to move the engagement ring to the right hand, then return it to the left hand after the wedding band has been placed.

A more recent tradition is to wear the engagement ring first, followed by the wedding band. This is based on the logic that the rings are worn in the order they are received. The engagement ring comes first, followed by the wedding band, which symbolises the fulfilment of the promises made.

Some brides choose to wear their wedding ring on one hand, usually the left, and the engagement ring on the other, usually the right. This could be because the rings don't match or because the bride doesn't like wearing multiple rings on one finger. There is nothing wrong with wearing the rings this way, it's just less common.

You could also choose to wear your wedding band and engagement ring on different fingers. This is a popular option for those who don't have a matching set or don't like the way the rings sit together. It's also a good choice for those who prefer not to stack multiple rings on one finger.

Ultimately, the order in which you wear your wedding band and engagement ring is up to you. There are no rules, and couples are increasingly making their own traditions. Whether you follow tradition or strike out on your own, the most important thing is that you wear your rings with confidence and style.

Non-traditional routes

There are several non-traditional reasons why people might choose to put their wedding band on first. Firstly, some people might prefer to wear their wedding ring on one hand and their engagement ring on the other. This could be because the rings don't match and wearing them on separate hands minimises the mismatch. It could also be because the bride doesn't like the feeling of wearing multiple rings on one finger. Wearing the wedding band on the left hand and the engagement ring on the right is the most common way to do this.

Another reason could be to do with the value of the rings. For example, if the wedding ring is extremely valuable, a bride might prefer to only wear it on special occasions to keep it safe, and wear her engagement ring instead for everyday use.

Some brides might also choose to alternate the weeks she wears her wedding and engagement rings, or to wear them on different fingers.

Customising rings

If you're starting from scratch, you can work with a jeweller to create a completely unique design. You can choose the type of metal, the shape and size of the diamond or gemstone, and any engraved details you'd like to include. You can also use lab-grown diamonds or recycled precious metals for a more sustainable and ethical option.

If you're customising an existing design, you can add your own personal touches such as an engraved pattern, a personalised emblem or message, or a unique gemstone. You can also work with a jeweller to create a matching engagement and wedding ring set.

Frequently asked questions