
Planning a wedding can be stressful, and one of the most important steps is figuring out your guest list. Sending out invitations and waiting for RSVPs is a crucial part of this process. The traditional method of sending physical RSVP cards has its pros and cons, and in today's digital world, online RSVPs are becoming increasingly popular. This article will explore the different options available to couples when it comes to deciding where to put their wedding RSVPs and how to manage the responses.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Format | Digital or paper |
| Content | Name, attendance, number of guests, food preferences, travel plans, well-wishes |
| Response deadline | Around four weeks before the wedding |
| Reminders | Friendly reminder before the deadline |
| RSVP deadline wording | "Kindly reply by [insert date]" or "Please respond by [insert date]" |
| Response method | Postal, email, text, online form, social media |
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What You'll Learn

Online or paper RSVP?
There are several options available for wedding RSVPs. You can choose to include RSVP cards with your invitations, or you can opt for online RSVPs, or even a combination of both.
Online RSVPs
Online RSVPs are a convenient option for your guests and can be easily completed from a phone or computer. This option also allows guests to change their responses if needed, which is not possible with paper response cards. Online RSVPs can be customised with different themes, fonts, and designs, and can be matched to your wedding website and paper invitations. You can also create custom questions for your guests, such as meal choices, travel plans, and song requests. Responses are automatically updated in your guest list, making it easy to track attendance and plan accordingly.
Paper RSVPs
Traditional paper RSVP cards allow for a formal and elegant approach to your wedding stationery. They can be designed with unique wording and formats to match your wedding theme and can be included as separate enclosure cards with your invitations. Paper RSVPs typically include a blank line for guests to write their names and indicate their attendance by checking "Yes" or "No". They can also be used to convey a relaxed and party-ready vibe with creative and funny wording.
Combining Both Options
You can give your guests the option to choose their preferred method of response by including both online and paper RSVP instructions. This ensures that all your guests, regardless of their comfort level with technology, can conveniently reply to your invitation.
Ultimately, the decision to choose online, paper, or a combination of both depends on your specific guest list and their comfort level with electronic responses.
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RSVP wording and etiquette
The primary purpose of an RSVP card is to find out who is coming to your wedding. Guests will indicate who they are and will confirm whether they will be attending or not. The first thing to include on your RSVP cards is a blank line for guests to write their names. On a formal RSVP card, you should write "M" at the start of the line to indicate that guests should include their proper honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) before their name. This guarantees that you know who is attending and how to correctly spell their name on the seating chart.
The wording of your RSVP card will depend on the style of your wedding. Printed cards are typically worded more formally, while digital options allow for a more relaxed tone. For formal weddings with vintage-style stationery, stick with traditional wording, such as "Kindly reply by [date]". For more casual weddings with minimalist stationery, use phrases like "We're excited to celebrate with you! Let us know if you're coming by [date]".
It is important to include a clear RSVP deadline, ideally four to six weeks before the wedding. You can also add a gentle reminder about the importance of receiving guest responses promptly. A sample RSVP deadline wording could be "Kindly reply by [insert date] or "Please respond by [insert date]".
You can also give guests the option to choose from physical or digital RSVPs. If you are sending digital invitations, you can include a hyperlink to the online RSVP. If you are sending paper invitations, you can include a wedding QR code so guests can scan and submit their reply.
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How to collect RSVPs
There are several ways to collect RSVPs for your wedding. The traditional method is to include an RSVP card with your wedding invitations. Guests will then fill out the card and send it back to you via mail. This method can be time-consuming and there is a risk of RSVPs getting lost in the mail.
Another option is to use online RSVPs. This can be done by including a hyperlink to your wedding website or a QR code on your digital wedding invitations. If you are sending paper invitations, you can include the full URL of your wedding website or a QR code that guests can scan to submit their response. Online RSVPs are convenient for guests as they can be completed from a phone, and there is no risk of them getting lost in the mail. You can also use a Guest List tool that automatically updates every time a reply is submitted, so you can easily access your most up-to-date wedding information.
You can also give guests the option to choose from physical or digital RSVPs. This can be done by including mailable RSVP cards as well as details for your wedding website so guests can choose the method they are most comfortable with.
- Set an RSVP deadline that is around four weeks before your wedding date to give yourself enough time to coordinate last-minute details.
- Include a blank line for guests to write their names and a line for them to indicate whether they will be attending or not.
- If you are using online RSVPs, consider creating custom questions to ask your guests about their meal selections, travel plans, and any other relevant information.
- Send friendly reminders to guests who have not responded by the deadline.
- Communicate any delays or changes in attendance promptly to the host so they can adjust their plans.
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RSVP deadline
The RSVP deadline is an important aspect of wedding planning, as it helps you finalise the guest list and make necessary arrangements. Here are some key considerations and tips for setting and managing your RSVP deadline:
Setting the RSVP Deadline
It is recommended to set the RSVP deadline around three to four weeks before the wedding date. This gives you enough time to finalise the guest list, create a seating chart, and coordinate last-minute details with vendors. Sending invitations six to eight weeks before the wedding is standard, allowing guests about a month to respond. For destination weddings, consider sending invitations ten to twelve weeks in advance to give guests ample time to make travel arrangements.
The RSVP deadline should be clearly featured on the invitation or response card. You can use wording such as "Kindly reply by [insert date]" or "Please respond by [insert date]." If you have a wedding website, include a countdown ticker for the RSVP deadline.
Managing Responses and Non-Responses
It is common for some guests to miss the RSVP deadline or forget to respond altogether. To manage non-responses, wait about a week after the deadline before sending friendly reminders or follow-ups to those who haven't responded. You can also send a reminder to all guests about a week before the deadline to reduce the number of late responses.
Offering Multiple Response Options
To increase the likelihood of timely responses, offer guests multiple RSVP options. You can provide a physical RSVP card with a pre-addressed and pre-stamped return envelope, as well as a digital option through your wedding website. This caters to guests who prefer traditional methods and those who prefer the convenience of online responses.
Wording and Format
The RSVP card should include a blank line for guests to write their names, with an "M" at the start to indicate their honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss). It should also have an attendance line where guests can accept or decline the invitation, formatted as checkboxes, circling, or fill-in-the-blank lines. You can include meal preferences on the RSVP card as well.
Early RSVP Challenges
While it is important to set an RSVP deadline, sending invitations too early can lead to challenges. Some guests may not respond promptly and may even forget about the invitation. Sending invitations four to eight weeks before the RSVP deadline is recommended to strike a balance between giving guests enough time to decide and creating a sense of urgency.
In summary, setting an RSVP deadline of around three to four weeks before the wedding and offering multiple response options will help streamline your wedding planning. Clear and engaging wording on the RSVP card will also encourage timely responses. Remember to follow up on non-responses and provide friendly reminders as needed.
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What to include on the card
The primary purpose of an RSVP card is to find out who will be attending your wedding. There are many ways to go about this, from digital RSVPs to physical cards.
If you're sending digital wedding invitations, you can include a hyperlink to the online RSVP. Alternatively, you can include a wedding QR code or the full URL of your wedding website.
If you're sending paper invitations, you can include an RSVP card with a pre-addressed and stamped envelope for guests to fill out and send back. You can also include a wedding website URL on the card for guests to RSVP online.
- A blank line for guests to write their names. On a formal RSVP card, indicate with an "M" that guests should include their proper honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss).
- A way for guests to indicate whether they will attend. This could be formatted as checkboxes, circling, or fill-in-the-blank lines.
- A clear RSVP deadline, usually about four weeks before the wedding, to give yourself time to finalise guest counts, meal preferences, and seating.
- If you'll be serving dinner, mention the meal type (buffet or plated dinner) and leave space for guests to detail dietary restrictions.
- A special request line for guests to write any special accommodations or notes.
- Details of the dress code, if not included elsewhere.
- Your contact details, such as a phone number and email address.
You can also include unique RSVP wording to inject humour or personality into your wedding details. For example, for a destination wedding, you can include playful wording and details about travel plans, accommodations, and pre-wedding events.
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Frequently asked questions
The RSVP details typically go at the bottom of your invitations. If you're sending digital wedding invitations, include a hyperlink to the online RSVP. If you're sending paper invitations, consider adding a wedding QR code or the full URL of your wedding website.
The primary purpose of an RSVP card is to learn who is coming to your wedding. It lets the host know whether you can attend and helps them plan and make necessary arrangements.
The RSVP deadline is usually around four weeks before the wedding date. This gives the couple enough time to coordinate last-minute details.
The first thing to include on your RSVP cards is a blank line for guests to write their names. You may also want to include meal options and an RSVP deadline.
Yes, you can request wedding RSVPs online. This can be done through a free RSVP website or by including online RSVP instructions on your wedding invitations.











































