Planning A Small Wedding: When To Begin?

Planning a wedding can be a stressful process, but it's important to remember that it's about celebrating the love between you and your partner. The first step is to decide on the vision for your wedding—do you want a small, intimate gathering or a large celebration? Once you have a clear idea, it's time to create a budget and choose a date. While the average time to plan a wedding is 12 to 18 months, smaller weddings typically take less time, and it's possible to plan a beautiful wedding in as little as six months. To stay organized, create a comprehensive schedule and consider using project management apps to keep track of tasks and timelines. Remember to delegate and ask for help when needed, and don't forget to enjoy the process!

Budgeting and venue hunting

The first step in planning a wedding is to establish a budget. Check your savings account and determine how much money you can allocate to the wedding. The budget will influence all other aspects of the wedding, from the venue to the decorations.

Once you have a budget in mind, it's time to start venue hunting. The venue will likely take up the largest chunk of your budget, so it's important to choose wisely. Consider whether you want an all-inclusive venue that includes staff, food, rentals, set-up, and clean-up, or if you prefer a more DIY approach. If you're on a tighter budget, consider a free venue, like a friend or family member's home, or a venue that offers an hourly rate. Don't forget to factor in service fees, which typically amount to 20-25% of the total food and drink fee.

When visiting venues, take inventory of their different packages and pick the one that best fits your needs and budget. Some venues offer ceremony-only rentals, which can be a more affordable option if you plan to host your reception elsewhere. If you're planning a small wedding, you may also want to consider eloping to a meaningful location and inviting a small handful of guests to witness your vows.

To make the most of your venue, consider strategies to enhance its appeal. For example, use floral arrangements to cover up an unsightly fence or draw attention to the dining tables. Think about what your guests will interact with the most and prioritize comfort and functionality in your decorations.

Finally, don't forget to allocate a portion of your budget to a wedding planner or coordinator. While it may seem like an unnecessary expense, a good wedding planner can save you time, money, and stress in the long run. They can help you negotiate better prices with vendors and avoid overspending on unnecessary items.

Guest list and VIPs

Planning a wedding can be a stressful task, especially when it comes to deciding on a guest list and VIPs. The first step is to figure out your budget and how many people you can afford to host. This will help you determine the size of your wedding and guide your guest list decisions.

Once you have a sense of your budget, it's time to start thinking about your VIPs and who you absolutely want to be there. This might include immediate family members, close friends, and important mentors, as well as their plus-ones and/or children. If you're having a small wedding, don't feel pressured to invite acquaintances, neighbours, distant relatives, or people you barely know. It's your special day, so focus on the people who are closest to you and will add to your celebration in a meaningful way.

When creating your guest list, it's important to be consistent and upfront about your plus-one policy. Decide early on whether you will offer a plus-one to every guest or only to those who are married, engaged, or in a serious long-term relationship. This will help you manage the number of guests and avoid any confusion or hurt feelings.

To make the process easier, consider using a guest list management tool, such as The Knot Guest List Manager, which allows you to manage tasks like collecting addresses and phone numbers, tracking RSVPs, and gathering information about dietary restrictions. Having all this information in one place will also simplify other aspects of your planning, such as creating a seating chart.

Finally, remember that your wedding is about you and your partner. While it's important to consider the input of loved ones and VIPs, ultimately, the day should reflect your vision and priorities as a couple.

Timing and schedule

The timing and schedule of your wedding depend on a variety of factors, including your vision for the day, the size of the wedding, and any time constraints you may have. The average time to plan a wedding is between 12 and 18 months, but it can be done in as little as six months or less. Smaller weddings usually require less planning, so if you're aiming for a more intimate celebration, you may have more flexibility with your timeline.

It is recommended to wait at least 30 days after getting engaged before diving into the wedding planning process. During this time, you can discuss your general vision, priorities, and budget, as well as pick a wedding date. This initial planning phase is crucial for laying the groundwork and ensuring you are organized and aligned before making any major decisions.

Once you have a clear vision and budget in place, you can start researching and reaching out to venues and vendors. Keep in mind that for popular venues and vendors, dates may fill up quickly, so it's important to start this process as early as possible. If you're working with a shorter timeline, be prepared to be flexible and consider using preferred vendor lists from your chosen venue to save time.

As you get closer to the wedding day, the planning will become more detailed and focused on the specific timing of the day's events. This includes hair and makeup appointments, transportation logistics, the couple's arrival at the reception, speeches, the first dance, cake-cutting, and any other special moments you want to include. Creating a comprehensive schedule for the day ensures that everyone involved, from vendors to your wedding party, is on the same page and helps the day run smoothly.

Lastly, don't forget to set aside time to take care of legal requirements, such as obtaining a marriage license, and to plan for any pre-wedding events, such as showers, bachelor/bachelorette parties, and rehearsal dinners. These additional celebrations often require some planning and coordination, so be sure to factor them into your overall timeline.

Pre-wedding events

Engagement Party

The engagement party is usually one of the first pre-wedding events and a fun way to kick off the celebrations. It typically takes place within one to three months of your engagement and is often hosted by the couple's parents. Invitations are usually extended to immediate family and a small group of friends, who should also be invited to the wedding. There are no hard and fast rules for when to host this party; it could be the weekend after you get engaged or a month later.

Bridal Shower/Couples' Shower

A bridal shower is a ladies-only celebration honouring the bride, while a couples' shower includes both partners and is hosted by friends and family close to both. These events typically occur between a few weeks and three months before the wedding. They can be held during the day over brunch or lunch, or you can opt for a fun evening event like a backyard BBQ.

Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties

The bachelor and bachelorette parties are a chance for the bride and groom to celebrate with their friends and wedding party. These events typically occur two to four months before the wedding, but the timing depends on the couple's schedules and the availability of out-of-town guests. The bachelor/bachelorette parties can range from a fun night out to a relaxing weekend getaway and reflect the guest of honour's personality.

Rehearsal Dinner

The rehearsal dinner is usually held the night before the wedding as the final celebration before the big day. It is a more intimate gathering where you can rehearse certain wedding protocols and share speeches and toasts with your loved ones. The rehearsal dinner is typically hosted by the groom's parents, but it can also be hosted by the couple or the bride's parents.

Welcome Party

The welcome party, also known as a "Jack and Jill" or "stag and doe", is a cocktail event where guests can mingle and kick off the wedding festivities. It is typically hosted by the couple or their parents and takes place after all the out-of-town guests have arrived. If you're having a destination wedding, it may happen several days before the wedding. However, if your wedding is local, it's often held the night before, and you can even pair it with the rehearsal dinner.

Honeymoon planning

Planning a wedding can be a stressful process, and simultaneously planning a honeymoon can be time-consuming and expensive. It is recommended to start planning your honeymoon at least six months in advance. The earlier you start, the better your chances of saving money and securing the best deals and availability.

Begin by establishing a realistic budget. Knowing your budget will help you choose destinations and activities that are within your means. Factor in all expected expenses, from flights and accommodation to meals, transportation, activities, and any splurges.

If you feel overwhelmed, consider enlisting the help of a professional travel agent or planner. They can provide up-to-date and reliable information, and save you time and effort, especially if you are planning an international trip.

Once you have your budget, start researching destinations and creating a loose travel plan. Consider the season and research weather trends and local events that may impact prices and availability. Decide how many days you want to spend at each location and how you'll get around, especially if you're planning a multi-stop honeymoon. Remember, the honeymoon is about relaxing and creating memorable experiences, so don't overbook your itinerary.

When you have your destination, you can start looking into specific accommodations, activities, and experiences. Research "honeymoon accommodations" in your chosen location, and consider reaching out to the hotel concierge to help with transportation and activity bookings. Look for recommended tour groups and experiences, and consider booking with experts who can provide passionate insights into the history and culture of the area.

Happy planning and enjoy your honeymoon!

Frequently asked questions