Rhiannon Hendricks
Wedding planning is stressful, and one of the most stressful tasks is chasing RSVPs. It's important to set an RSVP deadline and stick to it. The sweet spot for an RSVP deadline is around three to four weeks before the wedding, giving you time to organize your final guest list and figure out who hasn't responded. It's recommended that you send out invitations eight to twelve weeks in advance, giving guests enough time to prepare and reply. However, if your RSVP deadline has passed, it's reasonable to chase guests after one week. You can send a friendly reminder via text, email, or social media, and it's polite to include a deadline for responses.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| How much time should be given to guests to RSVP? | 3-4 weeks is the ideal time frame. |
| When to send out wedding invitations? | 6-8 weeks before the wedding. |
| When to chase wedding RSVPs? | After the RSVP deadline has passed, wait about a week before sending follow-ups. |
| How to chase wedding RSVPs? | Send a friendly reminder via text, email, or social media. |
| How early should wedding invitations be sent out? | 8-12 weeks before the wedding. |
| What to do if guests don't RSVP? | It is reasonable to chase after the RSVP date has passed; a simple "caterer needs to know" message will do. |
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What You'll Learn
How much time to give guests to RSVP
When it comes to setting an RSVP deadline, it's important to find the perfect balance. If you give your wedding guests too much time, they may procrastinate or forget to respond. But if you don't leave them enough time, they may make alternate plans.
The general consensus is that wedding invitations should be sent out between six and ten weeks before the wedding, giving guests around one month to RSVP. This means your RSVP deadline should be set for around three to four weeks before the wedding. This gives you enough time to finalise your guest list, figure out who hasn't responded, and chase up any stragglers.
If you're having a destination wedding, it's a good idea to send invitations a little earlier—around ten to twelve weeks before the wedding—to give guests more time to make travel arrangements. In this case, you might want to set your RSVP deadline for four to six weeks before the wedding.
No matter how much your guests love you, some will forget or put off responding until the last minute. To avoid unnecessary stress, set your RSVP deadline for two weeks before your venue and caterer's final guest count deadline. This gives you a buffer to track down any non-responders and confirm your final numbers.
To maximise your chances of getting RSVPs on time, give guests multiple ways to respond. Along with a paper RSVP card, consider including a QR code or website link where guests can submit their responses online. Be sure to clearly state the deadline on your invitations and wedding website, and consider sending a friendly reminder about one week before the deadline.
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When to send out invitations
The timing of sending out wedding invitations is crucial, impacting not just your schedule but also that of your esteemed guests. It gives your guests ample time to RSVP, plan their outfits, organise travel arrangements, and prepare any gifts.
The general rule of thumb is to send out wedding invitations six to eight weeks before the wedding. This gives your guests plenty of time to reply and make travel arrangements if they haven't already. It also allows you to get a final headcount, invite additional guests if needed, and complete your seating charts before the wedding. Sending invitations too early may result in guests forgetting to respond or having to change their RSVP status at the last minute.
However, if you have many out-of-town or international guests, it is advisable to send out invitations earlier. For destination weddings or weddings with many guests travelling from far-flung destinations, it is recommended to send invitations at least four to six months in advance. This allows guests enough time to request time off work, secure accommodations, and make the necessary travel arrangements.
If you have already sent out '"Save the Dates' with the wedding date and venue information, you can afford to send out the full invites closer to the wedding, typically around three months before. This is still enough time for guests to RSVP, and you can set a deadline for responses to be returned by, usually about a month before the wedding.
It is also worth noting that trends have changed since the pandemic, with couples sending out invitations further in advance as securing venues can take longer, and guests often require longer notice and RSVP options.
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What to do if guests don't respond
It is common for guests to not respond to wedding RSVPs. It is important to find out whether they are coming or not, as you won't be able to finalise your table plan without a confirmed headcount. Here is what you can do if your wedding guests don't respond:
- Send a polite reminder: A week before the RSVP deadline, send a quick and polite reminder to gently nudge late responders. You can send this via email or text, or even add a note to your wedding website. This gives people who have forgotten a chance to respond before the deadline.
- Call them: If you still haven't received a response after the deadline, try calling them. This is a more time-consuming method but will likely get you a response. It also shows that you are serious about getting a response.
- Send a follow-up message: If you still haven't heard back, send another follow-up message. You can use a template for this, such as: "I'm doing some final wedding prep this week and realised you hadn't RSVP'd yet. Will I get to see you and your lovely family on [wedding date]? No worries if you can't make it, but I need to give caterers a final headcount and wanted to check in."
- Meet in person: If you still can't get in touch with them, consider meeting them in person.
- Assume they are not coming: If you still haven't received a response, it is safe to assume they are not coming. This is likely because they are embarrassed, unsure, or simply forgot to respond.
Remember to give your guests enough time to respond to the initial invitation, usually about one month, and set a clear deadline to make it easier for you to chase any missing RSVPs.
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How to chase RSVPs
Chasing RSVPs is a normal part of wedding planning. It's important to set an RSVP deadline and stick to it. The deadline should be at least four weeks before the wedding, and no later than two weeks before.
- Make the process simple for your guests. Include a pre-addressed, pre-stamped return envelope with your invitations.
- Give guests different ways to respond. In addition to a paper RSVP card, offer a digital option via your wedding website.
- Emphasise the deadline on the invitation and your wedding website.
- Send a friendly reminder about one week before the deadline.
- If you haven't heard from guests by the deadline, wait about a week before sending follow-ups via text, email, or social media. Let them know the final date they can respond.
- If you're still waiting on RSVPs two weeks before the wedding, tell guests that if they don't respond in two days, you'll have to mark them as a 'no'.
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How to choose an RSVP deadline
When choosing an RSVP deadline, it's important to strike a balance between giving your guests enough time to respond and not leaving too much time that they might procrastinate or forget. Here are some tips to help you choose an RSVP deadline:
- Consider the logistics: Before setting your RSVP deadline, consider the logistics of your wedding. If you're having a destination wedding, send the invitations further in advance, around 10 to 12 weeks before the wedding, to give guests more time to make travel arrangements. The RSVP deadline for a destination wedding should be earlier to give you enough buffer time to account for all guests and plan pre- and post-wedding events.
- Work backward from your venue's deadline: Most venues and caterers require the final guest count about one to two weeks before the wedding. To avoid last-minute stress, set your RSVP deadline two weeks before your venue's deadline. This will give you time to follow up with any stragglers.
- Provide a reasonable timeframe for guests: Ideally, your RSVP deadline should be around three to four weeks before the wedding. This gives guests a reasonable timeframe to respond without being too close to or too far from the wedding date. Sending invitations six to eight weeks before the wedding gives guests about a month to RSVP, which is generally considered a good balance.
- Offer multiple response options: To increase the chances of receiving timely RSVPs, offer multiple response options. In addition to traditional mail-in cards, consider including a QR code or a link to your wedding website where guests can digitally submit their responses.
- Emphasize the deadline: When sending out invitations, emphasize the RSVP deadline clearly and use engaging language to encourage responses. For example, "RSVP with a song that will get you on the dance floor" or "Let us know by [date]."
- Send reminders: If you're waiting on a large number of guest responses, send friendly reminders about one week before the RSVP deadline. You can also add a note to your wedding website or send a quick reminder via email or text.
Remember, it's important to set an RSVP deadline and stick to it. While you may need to follow up with some guests, choosing the right deadline and taking these steps will help ensure that you receive most of your RSVPs on time.
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Frequently asked questions
It is recommended that wedding invitations be sent out 8 to 12 weeks before the wedding. This gives guests enough time to prepare and reply. For destination weddings, send the invites 10 to 12 weeks in advance to give guests more time to make travel arrangements.
The RSVP deadline should be set around three to four weeks before the wedding. This gives you enough time to organize your final guest list and chase any non-responders. It is important to clearly state this deadline on your invitations and wedding website.
It is reasonable to start chasing RSVPs the day after the RSVP deadline. You can send a friendly reminder or a polite nudge via text, email, or phone call. If you want to get numbers earlier than the RSVP deadline, you can set an earlier date and send out invitations 12 to 16 weeks in advance so you can start chasing 8 to 10 weeks out.
