Wedding Dates: When To Ask A Girl Out

Asking someone to be your date to a wedding can be a tricky business, especially if you're in a new relationship. While it's an exciting prospect, it's important to consider whether you're ready to introduce your date to friends and family, and whether they will be comfortable in that situation. It's also worth thinking about how well you know this person and whether you've seen them in a variety of social settings. After all, you don't want to find out how they react to emotional conversations or big family events on the day itself. It's also a good idea to ensure they have suitable attire for the wedding and that they are comfortable with the idea of attending.

Make sure you're exclusive

Bringing a plus-one to a wedding is a big deal. It signifies that this person holds a level of importance in your life that is more than just a casual fling. So, if you're thinking of asking a girl to be your date to a wedding, make sure that you're exclusive first.

Navigating a New Relationship

It can be tricky to decide when to ask a new partner to be your plus-one. Couples psychologist Dr. Sarah Schewitz explains that bringing a plus-one to a wedding means that this person is important to you and that you're proud to introduce them to your friends and family. If you're not at the stage where you're ready to introduce your date to the people in your life, then it's too soon to bring them to the wedding.

Have the Exclusive Talk

Before asking someone to be your date, you should be sure that you're both on the same page about the relationship. Psychologist Dr. Yvonne Thomas, Ph.D., advises that you should know if you're both feeling similarly about each other instead of just assuming. It's not fair to either of you to attend a wedding as a couple if the relationship has barely started, and it's not fair to the couple getting married to have them foot the bill for someone who might not be that relevant.

Be Sure About the Relationship

Before considering bringing a new partner as your date, take some time to reflect on where your headspace is at. Are you rebounding from a previous relationship? Dr. Thomas warns that you might not be clear about your feelings if you're still getting over an ex. Bringing a new partner as your plus-one could be a way to fill a void or avoid feeling upset about a previous relationship. Make sure you're confident in your feelings before taking a new partner to a wedding.

Know How They Are in Social Settings

Even if you're not super close to the couple getting married, weddings can evoke a lot of emotions. Dr. Schewitz says that not everyone handles these emotions the same way, and you don't want to find out how your date reacts in social settings on someone else's special day. It can be overwhelming for them and for you if they're uncomfortable and don't know anyone.

Consider Their Drinking Habits

Another important factor to consider is how your date handles alcohol. Dr. Karin Anderson Abrell warns against bringing someone to a wedding if you've never seen them in an open bar setting. Some people can't resist the temptation to overindulge when someone else is paying, and you don't want their drunken antics to ruin the wedding.

In summary, if you're thinking of asking a girl to be your date to a wedding, make sure that you're exclusive and that you've had honest conversations about the status of your relationship. Be sure about your feelings, and know how they handle social settings and alcohol before making your decision.

Be certain about the relationship

Asking someone to be your date to a wedding is a big deal. It's important to be certain about the relationship before extending an invitation. Here are some things to consider:

The Nature of Your Relationship

First, it's crucial to assess the nature of your relationship. Are you in a committed, exclusive relationship? If not, it might be too soon to ask this person to be your date. Introducing someone as your plus-one implies a certain level of seriousness and importance. If you're not sure about the relationship or are still getting to know each other, it's best to hold off on the invitation.

Compatibility and Social Awareness

Consider your compatibility and how well you know each other. Have you spent time together in large social settings? Weddings can be overwhelming, and you want to be confident that your date will handle the event appropriately. They should be socially aware and able to navigate awkward conversations or emotional moments that may arise. It's also essential to ensure they are comfortable with the idea of attending and will be able to enjoy themselves, even if they don't know many people there.

Alcohol Consumption

Another important consideration is how they handle alcohol. Weddings often involve open bars, and you want to be sure your date can handle themselves in a formal setting with abundant alcohol. You don't want their drunken antics to distract from the couple's special day or cause embarrassment.

Your Intentions and Expectations

Be clear about your intentions and expectations. If you're asking this person as a friend or potential romantic interest, ensure they understand your intentions to avoid any confusion or mixed signals. Communicate your expectations for their attire, behaviour, and level of commitment to the event.

Your Relationship with the Couple

Finally, consider your relationship with the couple getting married. If you are part of the bridal party or have a significant role in the wedding, it might not be the best idea to bring a date. You'll likely be busy with responsibilities and won't have much time to spend with them.

In conclusion, when deciding to ask someone to be your date to a wedding, it's crucial to be certain about the relationship and consider various factors to ensure a pleasant experience for everyone involved.

Know how they are in social settings

Knowing how your potential date handles social settings is crucial when deciding whether to ask them to a wedding. Weddings evoke a lot of emotions, and not everyone handles these the same way. You don't want to find out how they react in social settings on someone else's special day.

Monitor their body language

The body language that a person presents to others says a lot about how they are feeling, which can significantly impact their conversations with others. If they can hold their head up high and lift their shoulders, it can improve their conversations with others. A warm handshake and a smile will also help others feel welcome and engaged, which will help them feel more confident and comfortable.

Ask them questions about themselves

When it comes to social situations, the way a conversation moves forward is crucial to becoming more relaxed and comfortable in engaging with others. Asking questions about the people you are talking to will help you think of things to say and build common ground, reducing the stress of meeting new people.

Keep boundaries in mind

It is important to share details about yourself, but also to maintain appropriate boundaries so everyone can feel comfortable. Oversharing personal details or invading someone's personal space can cause embarrassment and end an otherwise positive social interaction.

Help them prepare for the event

Developing a plan for the event or learning further details about the upcoming situation can help ease anxiety about the unknown. Knowing what to expect, such as the timeline of the event, can provide peace of mind and make your date feel more secure.

Encourage them to challenge themselves socially

Encourage your date to challenge themselves socially by starting small and working their way up. They can begin with small, structured social situations where everyone can feel comfortable, such as remote social skills training, and gradually move on to larger gatherings. This will help them build their social skills and increase their comfort level in social settings.

Know how they are around alcohol

When it comes to asking someone to be your date to a wedding, it's important to consider how well you know them and whether you feel comfortable having them accompany you to such a significant event. One aspect to think about is how they typically behave around alcohol, especially if there will be an open bar at the wedding. Here are some things to keep in mind and consider when deciding whether to ask a girl to be your date to a wedding, specifically regarding her relationship with alcohol:

Know Their Drinking Habits

It's crucial to have spent time with your potential date in a variety of settings, including social settings where alcohol is present. This will give you an understanding of their drinking habits and how they behave under the influence. If you haven't witnessed how they handle themselves in an open bar setting, it might be wise to reconsider bringing them to a wedding where alcohol will likely be abundant.

Be Aware of Alcohol's Effects on Women

Recognize that alcohol can affect women differently than men. On average, women tend to have higher blood alcohol levels than men of the same weight after consuming the same amount of alcohol. This is because women typically have a lower percentage of body water, and alcohol resides predominantly in body water. As a result, women may be more susceptible to the negative health effects of alcohol and may experience hangovers and alcohol-induced blackouts more frequently than men.

Understand the Risks of Excessive Drinking

Excessive alcohol consumption can lead to medical emergencies and even death. Women are more prone to specific alcohol-related health issues, such as liver disease, cognitive decline, heart disease, and certain cancers. Additionally, drinking during pregnancy can cause fetal alcohol spectrum disorders, with potential physical, cognitive, and behavioral problems for the child. These risks should be considered when assessing whether your potential date has a healthy relationship with alcohol.

Look for Signs of Alcohol Abuse or Dependence

Be mindful of signs that your date may be struggling with alcohol abuse or dependence. These signs could include an inability to cut down or control alcohol consumption, intense cravings, drinking regardless of consequences or relationship problems, drinking in dangerous situations, and physical signs of liver damage or other health issues. If you notice any of these signs, it may be best to reconsider bringing them to the wedding and encourage them to seek help instead.

Discuss Expectations and Boundaries

If you decide to ask the girl to be your date to the wedding, have an open and honest conversation about your expectations and boundaries regarding alcohol consumption. Communicate the importance of moderation and ensure she is aware of any potential risks or consequences of excessive drinking. Establish that you will both look out for each other's well-being during the event.

Be sure they have the right attire

When it comes to wedding attire, it's important to follow the specified dress code. The dress code is usually included on the invitation and can vary from black-tie to casual.

For a black-tie wedding, men typically wear a tuxedo with a bow tie and patent leather shoes. Women often opt for floor-length evening gowns or elegant dresses. It's important to choose formal fabrics such as satin, lace, organza or taffeta.

If the wedding is black-tie optional, men can choose between a tuxedo and a dark suit, while women can select a gown or a knee-length or midi cocktail dress.

For a formal wedding, men can wear a jacket and tie or a traditional suit, and women can opt for an elegant dress or a pantsuit. Tuxedos are not required for this dress code.

Cocktail attire offers more flexibility, with men typically wearing a suit and tie, and women choosing a short formal dress or a jumpsuit.

Semi-formal attire is similar to cocktail attire but tends to be less dressy. Women can opt for a midi dress, a chic jumpsuit, or a wrap dress, while men can wear a suit and tie.

For a dressy casual wedding, men can wear a navy blazer, a blue button-down shirt, or khaki pants, and women can choose a dress with a nice neckline and simple accessories.

When attending a casual wedding, it's still important to remember that it is a formal event. Men can opt for a blazer and dress pants, while women can wear a sundress, a high-low dress, or a jumpsuit.

The venue and location of the wedding can also provide clues about the appropriate attire. For example, a beach wedding calls for lighter and flowy fabrics, while a winter wedding may require richer fabrics like velvet and silk.

Additionally, it's important to avoid wearing white to a wedding, as it is typically reserved for the bride.

Frequently asked questions