Rsvp Etiquette: When To Include On Wedding Invites

When it comes to wedding planning, there are a lot of factors to consider and one of the most important is the guest list. To ensure that you have an accurate headcount for your big day, it is crucial to include an RSVP date on your wedding invitations. This allows your guests to confirm their attendance and helps you finalise the details with your caterers and venue. The ideal deadline for RSVPs is around four weeks before the wedding, giving you ample time to confirm numbers and make any necessary adjustments. While some couples opt for traditional paper invitations and response cards, others are choosing digital invitations and online RSVPs, which can be a more eco-friendly and convenient option. Ultimately, the choice is yours, but it is important to consider the preferences and comfort levels of your guests when making your decision.

RSVPs for destination weddings

For destination weddings, it is important to give guests ample time to plan and make travel arrangements. Wedding invitations should be sent out at least two to four months before the wedding. This is to ensure that guests can be part of any travel group and make arrangements such as booking time off work.

The RSVP deadline for destination weddings should be set at least four to six weeks before the wedding. This allows the couple to confirm numbers with caterers and venues, and gives them time to create a seating plan. It is also important to consider the requirements of travel agents, venues, and caterers, who may need final numbers by a certain date.

It is a good idea to set up a personal website or app to collect RSVPs and receive alerts when someone responds. This makes it easier to keep track of numbers and to follow up with guests.

To ensure that guests RSVP on time, it is recommended to include a pre-addressed, pre-stamped return envelope with the invitation. It is also beneficial to provide guests with options for responding, such as digitally through a wedding website, as well as including clear and direct wording on the invitation.

RSVPs for holiday weddings

Planning a wedding during the holidays is a fun way to celebrate, and venues are often more affordable during off-peak seasons. However, it's important to give your guests ample notice, as holidays are a busy time for travel and accommodations.

Send Save-the-Dates Early

It's a good idea to send save-the-date cards as early as possible for a holiday wedding. This will give your guests a heads-up to mark their calendars, especially if they need to make travel arrangements. Sending save-the-dates six to eight months in advance is common, but for a holiday wedding, you may want to send them even earlier, as soon as you've confirmed the date.

Send Invitations with Plenty of Notice

For a holiday wedding, consider sending your invitations three months in advance. This will give your guests enough time to plan their travel and make any necessary arrangements. The standard timeline for sending wedding invitations is six to eight weeks before the wedding, but for a holiday wedding, you'll want to give your guests more time to prepare.

Set an RSVP Deadline

As a general rule, it's ideal for guests to reply to a wedding invitation at least four weeks before the ceremony. This gives you time to confirm numbers with your caterer and venue. For a holiday wedding, you may want to set the RSVP deadline for six weeks before the wedding, especially if you're expecting many out-of-town guests who need to book travel.

Include All the Necessary Information

Make sure your invitations include all the relevant details your guests will need to plan their attendance. This includes information about the dress code, whether the wedding can accommodate children, and any special holiday events happening alongside the ceremony. You may also want to collect information about allergies and dietary restrictions, along with email addresses and phone numbers.

Follow Up with Guests Who Haven't Responded

Even with careful planning, you may find yourself waiting on some RSVPs as the deadline passes. It's perfectly acceptable to follow up with guests who haven't responded. Send a polite message or give them a quick call to remind them to send their RSVPs.

Remember, a holiday wedding can be a magical experience, but it requires a bit more advance planning to ensure your guests have the information they need to join the celebration.

How to set an RSVP deadline

Setting an RSVP deadline is an important part of wedding planning. Here are some tips on how to go about it:

Know the Timeline

The RSVP deadline is usually set around four weeks before the wedding date. This allows enough time for the couple to confirm numbers with their caterer and venue, and finalise other details such as seating charts and food preferences. Therefore, it is recommended that wedding invitations are sent out at least eight weeks before the wedding, to give guests ample time to respond.

Communicate the Deadline Clearly

When creating your invitations, ensure the RSVP deadline is featured prominently and is easy for guests to see. Many designs put the deadline front and centre, or make it the largest text on the card. You could also include a line such as "Kindly reply by [insert date]" or "Please respond by [insert date]".

Be Prepared to Chase

Even with a clear deadline, some guests may not respond in time. It is a good idea to set aside some time to send reminders to those who haven't replied, whether that's by text, email, or a quick phone call. It is also worth noting that some guests may put their reply in the mail on the deadline date, so you may not receive it for a few days.

Consider Your Vendors' Needs

While the deadline of four weeks before the wedding is a good rule of thumb, it is worth checking with your caterer and venue to see if they require numbers earlier. If so, you will need to set your RSVP deadline accordingly, to give yourself time to gather any late responses.

Be Mindful of Your Guests' Needs

If you are having a destination wedding or a wedding during a holiday period, it is a good idea to give your guests more notice. This will allow them enough time to make travel arrangements and accommodation bookings. In these cases, it is common to send out "save the date" cards in advance of the formal invitations.

Online RSVPs

There are numerous online platforms available to assist with online RSVPs, such as The Knot, RSVPify, and Joy. These platforms offer customizable wedding websites, online RSVP forms, and guest list management tools. They also allow couples to collect important information from guests, such as meal preferences, dietary restrictions, and travel plans.

When creating an online RSVP, it is important to include all the relevant details, such as the full URL of the wedding website and the deadline for responses. This information is typically included at the bottom of the invitation or on a separate enclosure card. Couples may also choose to include a QR code that links directly to the digital RSVP.

While online RSVPs offer numerous benefits, it is important to consider that some older guests may not be comfortable using technology. In such cases, it is advisable to provide alternative options, such as paper response cards or a phone number to call or text their reply.

Overall, online RSVPs are a convenient and efficient way to manage wedding responses, and they can help streamline the planning process for both the couple and their guests.

What to include on RSVP cards

Wedding RSVP cards give your guests a first taste of your theme and allow you to gather essential information for your wedding planning. Here is what to include on your RSVP cards:

Space for Guests' Names

Traditionally, this is a long blank line that begins with a printed "M". This is where recipients will write the names of those planning to attend your wedding. A more modern alternative is to print "Name:" before the blank line.

The RSVP Deadline Date

The date by which you need the recipient's response should be prominent on your RSVP cards. This gives your guests a sense of urgency to respond as soon as possible. For a more formal feel, you can use wording such as "The favour of a reply is requested by" or "Your reply is requested by". For a more casual vibe, "RSVP by" or "Please respond by" work well.

Accept or Decline Options

This is another key feature of RSVP cards. You can be as creative as you like here, or tie the responses into your wedding theme. For a formal wedding, you might stick with traditional wording such as "Accepts with Pleasure" and "Declines with Regret". For a casual destination wedding, you might prefer laid-back language like "Our Bags Are Packed!" and "We'll be Toasting From Afar!".

Food Choices

If you are serving a sit-down dinner at your reception, include a small section at the bottom of the RSVP card where recipients can select their choice of entrée. Be sure to be considerate of people who may have food allergies or dietary restrictions.

Additional Events

If you are throwing a post-celebration brunch the morning after your wedding, be sure to ask guests to reply to this additional event so you can plan your food budget accordingly.

Accommodation

If you are inviting out-of-town guests, consider including a line that invites them to specify where they will be staying. This is especially useful if you have room blocks at hotels in the area, making it easier to coordinate welcome gift bags and transportation.

Frequently asked questions