Deborah Chan
Dancing is one of the most popular wedding reception activities, and there are certain traditional wedding dances that make the celebration even more meaningful. The wedding reception usually starts with the grand entrance, followed by dinner, toasts, and cake cutting. The first dance typically happens immediately after the guests settle in and before dinner, but many couples choose to dance while the dinner is ongoing or after. The father-daughter dance usually comes after the couple's first dance, but it may also take place after dinner, once the cake has been cut, or towards the end of dinner after the toasts. The Hora, a lively circle dance where the newlyweds and their parents are lifted up on chairs, is a Jewish wedding classic that usually follows the first dance to signify the start of the reception. The anniversary dance, also known as the bouquet dance, is another popular tradition where all married couples are invited to the dance floor, and the DJ asks those married for less than a year to take a seat, continuing until the longest-married couple remains. The money dance, where guests pay to dance with the couple, typically takes place towards the end of the reception.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| When it happens | Immediately after guests settle, before dinner, during dinner, or after dinner |
| Who dances | The couple, with guests joining them or not |
| Dance type | Slow, fast, classic, upbeat, quirky, romantic, or anything |
| Order of dances | First dance, father-daughter dance, mother-son dance, anniversary dance, bouquet dance, garter toss, money dance, last dance |
| Other activities | Grand entrance, dinner, toasts, cake cutting, open dancing, after-party, send-off |
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What You'll Learn
The Hora: a Jewish wedding tradition
The hora, also known as the chair dance, is a traditional dance performed at Jewish wedding receptions. It is a highly energetic Israeli circle dance that is considered one of the highlights of the wedding. The hora is usually performed to klezmer music, and guests are expected to dance with as much vigour and enthusiasm as they would on their own wedding day.
The hora can be performed at different times during the reception. Some couples choose to do it as soon as the couple is introduced to the guests at the beginning of the reception, while others opt to do it after dinner before opening the dance floor for more dances. There is no set rule for when it should be done, and the length of the dance depends on the couple's desires and community traditions. For some families, the hora may be just one song, while for others, it may last an hour or even multiple hours.
During the hora, guests join hands and move in choreographed steps that are easy to learn. In more traditional Jewish communities, men and women dance separately in their circles, while in more modern communities, they dance together in co-ed circles with the couple in the middle. The couple may also hold one end of a handkerchief or napkin to signify their union. As the dance progresses, chairs are brought to the middle of the circles, and the newlyweds are encouraged to sit down. The guests then hoist the chairs, lifting the married couple into the air. This act symbolises the spiritual elevation of the couple on their wedding day, bringing them closer to God.
The hora is a lively and fun tradition that guests of all ages, religions, and cultures can enjoy to celebrate the newlyweds. It is often performed with a live band or a DJ playing klezmer music. The hora is an integral part of Jewish weddings, and its modern form dates back to 1924 when it was performed for Jews settling in Palestine. Since then, it has become associated with joy and is often performed at special occasions.
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The anniversary dance
The longest-married couple may receive a special bouquet or a round of applause from the wedding guests. Alternatively, the bride may give her bouquet to the woman of this couple, and the groom may offer a bottle of something special to the man. This moment celebrates not only the newlyweds but also the enduring love and commitment of the long-married couple.
If you plan to include the anniversary dance at your wedding, it is a good idea to choose the song in advance. Pick a song that is enjoyed by all ages of married couples and that reflects the sentiment of the occasion. Some popular choices include "It Had to Be You" by Harry Connick, Jr., "Still Crazy After All These Years" by Paul Simon, and "As Time Goes By" by Billie Holiday.
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The money dance
In Cajun weddings, for example, a band starts playing a song for the money dance, which informs the guests to start dancing in marching formation behind the couple. Then the newlyweds dance in the middle of the dance floor by themselves and finally with their parents. After that, everyone dances on the dance floor, and guests get a chance to dance with a member of the happy couple.
If you are planning to include the money dance at your wedding, it is a good idea to explain the tradition to your guests beforehand so they have context and are not surprised or confused. You can include a note on your wedding website or have your MC make an announcement at the wedding.
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The grand entrance
After the grand entrance, guests will typically be seated for dinner. During dinner, the DJ plays background music, and someone may say a blessing or prayer. Toasts are made, usually by members of the wedding party or the couple's parents. The cake is then cut, often followed by the first dance.
The first dance is a highly anticipated moment and is usually the dance that opens the floor. The couple can choose whether they would like to dance alone or with their guests, and the style and tempo of the music are also up to them. The first dance can take place immediately after the grand entrance and before dinner, or it can be timed to occur during or after dinner.
The father-daughter dance typically comes after the first dance, but it may also take place towards the end of dinner, after toasts, or once the cake has been cut. The mother-son dance can follow a similar timeline, taking place either right after the first dance or later in the evening.
In Jewish weddings, the Hora is a traditional dance that usually follows the first dance, signifying the start of the reception. For this dance, the newlyweds and their parents are lifted onto chairs and paraded around the dance floor while the guests perform a circular line dance.
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The first dance
However, others prefer to wait until after dinner, using the meal as a natural transition to the dancing portion of the night. This approach can feel more seamless, especially if there is no grand entrance or formal introduction of the couple. It also gives the newlyweds a chance to mingle with their guests during cocktail hour and enjoy their meal without interruption.
If you choose to go with the former option, you can follow the first dance with parent dances, such as the father-daughter and mother-son dances, to keep the momentum going and encourage other guests to join in. Alternatively, you can have the first dance after cake cutting, which is traditionally done after dinner, creating a natural transition to the dance floor.
The song choice for the first dance is also important. It should be personal to the couple and hold sentimental value, whether it's a classic romantic tune or something more quirky and contemporary. If you're feeling nervous about being the centre of attention, you can invite the wedding party, family, and friends to join you on the dance floor after the first 30 seconds or so. This way, you can have a more inclusive first dance while still enjoying a few special moments as a couple.
Ultimately, the timing of the first dance depends on your preference and how you envision the reception flowing. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, so feel free to get creative and make it your own!
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Frequently asked questions
The wedding chair dance, also known as the Hora, is a Jewish wedding tradition where the bride and groom are hoisted in the air on chairs while everyone gathers around them to celebrate. The Hora usually follows the first dance to signify the start of the reception. It can also take place after dinner to kick off the dancing portion of the event.
The newlyweds and their parents are lifted on chairs during the Hora, while the guests dance in a circular line dance around them.
Yes, the timing of the wedding chair dance is flexible and can be tailored to your preference. It is commonly done after the first dance or after dinner.
The Hora is a lively and fun circle dance that is a classic tradition at Jewish weddings.
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