Deborah Chan
A wedding ring is imbued with significance and emotional weight. It is a symbol of infinity, with no beginning and no end. So, what happens to this symbol of everlasting love when a marriage ends?
There is no right time to remove a wedding band after divorce, and there are no established rules for dealing with rings following a split. Some people remove their rings the moment their spouse moves out, while others wait until the divorce is finalised. Some hurl their rings into the ocean, or at their ex-spouse, while others keep them tucked away in a drawer.
Legally, wedding rings are viewed as an inchoate or anticipatory gift. This means that once a couple is married, the gift is earned and separate property in a divorce. While there are no rules for what to do with a wedding ring post-divorce, it is generally accepted that each partner gets to keep their respective rings.
Emotionally, however, it is a different story. Some people are repulsed by the idea of keeping their ring, while others want to hold on to it, either to pass it down to their children or to keep as a symbol of the good times in their marriage.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Keep the ring | For sentimental value, to pass it down to children, or until you feel ready to let it go |
| Sell the ring | For cash, to kickstart a new chapter in your life |
| Donate the ring | To an organisation helping people in need, such as a domestic violence shelter |
| Repurpose the ring | Melt it down and create a new piece of jewellery, such as a necklace or earrings |
| Return the ring | Offer to return the ring to your ex-spouse, especially if it was an heirloom |
| Dispose of the ring | Throw it away, flush it, or toss it into the ocean |
What You'll Learn
Sell it
Selling a wedding ring after a divorce can be a great way to reclaim your story and move on from the past. It is a way to rid yourself of a painful reminder of a relationship that has ended and can provide a financial windfall to fund new projects, vacations, or even a new piece of jewellery.
There are many avenues to sell a wedding ring, but they are not all created equal. Local jewellery stores, for example, are reluctant to buy rings back for fair market value as they need to cover the cost of doing business. Pawn shops are well-regulated and safe, but rarely offer competitive pricing. eBay is not advisable due to the high number of scammers on the site.
One option is to use an online auction platform such as Worthy, which has lower overhead costs than a jeweller and access to the international diamond market. This can result in stronger offers for your diamonds. Worthy also provides full insurance coverage for your ring and works with top gemological laboratories such as GIA to enhance trust and ring value.
Another option is to repurpose your wedding ring. You could, for example, turn it into a necklace or earrings. This can be a way to reclaim your personal style and individuality following a divorce.
If you are unsure about what to do with your wedding ring, it is recommended that you wait before making any hasty decisions. However, selling your ring can be a positive step towards healing and forging a new future.
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Repurpose it
If you love the ring but not what it stands for, you can repurpose your wedding band into something new. It can be empowering to reclaim your wedding ring and give it a new life as a different piece of jewellery.
Firstly, you could turn your wedding band into a different type of jewellery, such as a necklace, pendant, anklet, barrette, bracelet or earrings. You could also melt down the metal and turn it into a tiny sculpture.
Secondly, you could redesign your wedding band into a new ring. You could wear it on your right hand as a symbol of your strength and independence, or you could reset the stones into a new design.
Thirdly, you could pass your wedding band down to your children, either as it is or redesigned into something new for them to wear.
Finally, you could donate your wedding band to a charity or organisation that can resell it to help those in need.
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Keep it
Keeping your wedding ring after a divorce can be a complex decision, but it is ultimately your choice. Here are some reasons why you might want to keep your wedding band:
Sentimental Value
Divorce signifies the end of a significant chapter in your life, and it's natural to feel attached to your wedding ring, especially if you wore it every day. Keeping the ring can provide a sense of comfort and help you hold on to the happy memories of your marriage.
Heirloom
If your wedding band is an antique or a family heirloom, you may want to keep it for its sentimental and historical value. You could consider passing it down to your children or grandchildren, either as a keepsake or for them to use in their own weddings.
Financial Constraints
Divorce proceedings can be expensive, and if you're facing financial challenges, selling your wedding ring might be an option to generate some extra cash. However, it's important to research the resale value of your ring, as you may not get the price you expect.
Redesign and Repurpose
If you like the design of your wedding band but not what it represents, you could consider having it redesigned or repurposed into a new piece of jewellery. This could be a necklace, earrings, or even an anklet. This way, you can still enjoy the ring's aesthetics without the emotional associations.
Time and Emotional Healing
Divorce is an emotional process, and it's okay if you're not ready to part with your wedding band right away. You can keep the ring tucked away in a safe place and give yourself time to heal. You might find that your feelings about the ring change over time, and you can make a different decision in the future when you feel ready.
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Give it back
Returning a wedding ring to an ex-spouse is a common approach, especially if the ring was a family heirloom. This is a generous and noble gesture, and it is often appreciated as a sign of respect for what was once shared.
If the ring was given to you by your ex-spouse's mother or another family member, it is usually considered good etiquette to return it. Keeping the ring in this instance could be seen as mean-spirited.
In some cases, there may be legal grounds to return the ring. For example, if there is a prenuptial or post-marital agreement in place that stipulates the ring must be returned, you will be legally bound to do so. Additionally, some states in the US consider the wedding ring given during the marriage ceremony as marital property, which is divisible in a divorce. It is always best to consult a divorce attorney to understand the laws in your state or country.
If you are unsure about whether to give the ring back, consider your relationship with your ex-spouse and the potential impact of this decision. Returning the ring may be a way to bring closure to the relationship and move forward.
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Get rid of it
If you're looking to get rid of your wedding band after a divorce, there are several options to consider. Here are some ways to part with your ring and move forward:
Sell It
If you're looking to recoup some financial losses from the divorce or simply want to get rid of the ring, selling it is an option. You can sell your ring online through websites that specialise in reselling wedding rings, such as I Do Now I Don't and Have You Seen the Ring. Alternatively, you can sell it to a local jeweller, pawn shop, or through online platforms like eBay or Craigslist.
Donate It
If you don't want to sell the ring but still want to part with it, consider donating it to a worthy cause. You can look for organisations that resell jewellery for fundraising, such as the I Have Wings Breast Cancer Foundation. Another option is to give it to a friend or family member who may be delaying their engagement or marriage due to the cost of rings.
Repurpose It
If you like the idea of transforming your ring into something new, you can repurpose the jewels. Take the ring to a jeweller and have it redesigned into a new piece of jewellery, such as a necklace, earrings, or a pendant. You can also create a work of art by dismantling the ring and using the jewels to create a mosaic image or sculpture.
Give It a Ceremonial Goodbye
If you want a symbolic way to part with your ring, consider a ceremonial goodbye. This could involve tying the ring to a helium balloon and letting it go, or floating it down a river on a toy boat. For a more dramatic approach, some people choose to throw it away, whether that's in the trash, down the toilet, or out of a car window.
Bury It
If you want to give your ring a proper ending, you can place it in a box that symbolises the loss you've suffered. A Wedding Ring Coffin, for example, conveys the death of your hopes and dreams. You can display it in your home or perform a solemn backyard burial ceremony to lay your ring to rest.
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Frequently asked questions
You have several options for what to do with your wedding band after a divorce. You could sell it, repurpose it into a new piece of jewellery, keep it, or give it back to your ex-spouse.
Repurposing your wedding band can be a way to reclaim your personal style and individuality following a divorce. It can also be an opportunity to create a new piece of jewellery that holds no sentimental value.
You could melt it down and turn it into a sculpture, or use the jewels to create a new piece of jewellery such as a necklace, anklet, or barrette. You could also frame it with a handwritten quote that sums up your feelings about moving on.
