Deborah Chan
Wedding rings are a long-standing tradition that dates back to the Roman Empire. Today, there are many different types of wedding rings to choose from, and several ways to wear them. The wedding band is traditionally a plain metal band or a diamond-encrusted eternity band that is exchanged during the wedding ceremony. Engagement rings, on the other hand, are typically given during a marriage proposal and feature a dominant stone. While some people follow traditions when wearing their wedding and engagement rings, there is no right or wrong way to wear them, and it ultimately comes down to personal preference and style. Couples can choose to wear their rings on the same hand, different hands, or even not at all. In addition to choosing how to wear their rings, couples should also consider how to care for their rings to make them last a lifetime.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Wedding ring placement | Traditionally, the wedding band is worn closest to the heart (on the left hand in countries like Australia). |
| Engagement ring placement | The engagement ring is usually placed on top of the wedding band |
| Ring order | There is no "proper" order, and it ultimately comes down to personal preference and style expression. |
| Ring exchange | The best man, maid of honour, or another trusted individual typically handles the rings during the ceremony. |
| Ring care | To ensure longevity, it is recommended to avoid wearing wedding rings during activities involving harsh chemicals and to store them separately from other metals. |
| Ring repurposing | After a divorce, some individuals choose to repurpose their wedding and engagement rings by using the stones to create new pieces of jewellery. |
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What You'll Learn
The order of wearing wedding and engagement rings
The order in which wedding and engagement rings are worn has been influenced by customs and traditions. The Romans believed that the left-hand ring finger housed the "vena amoris," a vein thought to be directly connected to the heart. Consequently, the wedding band is traditionally worn closest to the heart, followed by the engagement ring. This sequence reflects the order of events in a couple's relationship, from proposal to marriage ceremony.
On the wedding day, the groom places the wedding band on top of the engagement ring. After the ceremony, the order is typically reversed, with the wedding band on the bottom and the engagement ring on top. This creates a cohesive look and allows the engagement ring's centre stone to stand out. Some people choose to wear their wedding band on top for practical reasons or to highlight its importance.
There is no one-size-fits-all approach to wearing wedding and engagement rings. Personal style, comfort, and ring design are all factors that can influence the order in which the rings are worn. Some people choose to wear each ring on a different finger or opt for alternative jewellery pieces, such as converting a ring into a pendant. Ultimately, the best way to wear wedding and engagement rings is to prioritise personal choice and style.
While tradition suggests a specific order and finger placement for wedding and engagement rings, comfort and personal preference are also important considerations. Some people may find that the traditional stacking order is uncomfortable or that the rings do not fit together well. In these cases, it is perfectly acceptable to wear the rings in a different order or on different fingers.
In addition to the order in which the rings are worn, there are other factors to consider, such as regular cleaning and inspections to ensure the rings last a lifetime. It is also important to take off the rings during strenuous activities or when applying lotion to prevent scratches or damage.
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The hand to wear wedding rings on
The hand on which wedding rings are worn varies according to different cultural norms and traditions. In many Western countries, including the UK, the USA, and parts of Europe, it is customary to wear the wedding ring on the fourth finger of the left hand, which is thought to be the finger with a vein that runs directly to the heart. This belief can be traced back to the Ancient Romans, who named this vein the "Vena Amoris" or "vein of love".
However, in several countries, including India, Germany, Spain, Norway, Russia, Latvia, Hungary, Greece, Serbia, Belgium, Portugal, Ukraine, Bulgaria, Austria, Poland, Denmark, Cuba, Jordan, Venezuela, and Colombia, it is traditional to wear the wedding ring on the right hand. In India, for example, the left hand is considered impure, and in Germany, a man wearing a ring on his right hand is a sure sign that he is married. In Turkey, it is also customary to wear the engagement ring on the left hand and the wedding ring on the right.
In some cultures, the hand on which the wedding ring is worn may also depend on sexual orientation. For instance, in the LGBTQ+ community, it was common to wear 'commitment' rings on the right hand before same-sex marriage was legalized in most countries. Nowadays, same-sex couples tend to wear their wedding rings on the traditional left-hand ring finger.
Ultimately, the decision of where to wear a wedding ring is a personal choice that may be influenced by cultural background, comfort, and style preferences.
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Caring for wedding rings
Wedding rings are often worn every day and can be exposed to various substances and activities that can affect their appearance and durability. To ensure your wedding ring remains in good condition, it is important to care for it properly. Here are some tips to help you care for your wedding ring:
Firstly, it is recommended to get your ring checked by a jeweller regularly to ensure all the prongs are tight and secure, and to get it polished so it maintains its sparkle. You can either return to the jeweller you purchased the ring from or find a local jeweller who may offer this service for free or at a small cost.
Secondly, it is important to clean your wedding ring regularly, especially if it has diamonds or gemstones. A gentle, at-home cleaning method involves soaking the ring in a bowl of warm water and mild dishwashing liquid for about 10 to 30 minutes, then gently scrubbing it with a soft-bristled toothbrush. Baking soda can also be used as a mild, non-abrasive cleaner by creating a soft paste with warm water and gently rubbing it on the ring with your fingers before rinsing it off.
Thirdly, there are certain situations where it is advisable to remove your wedding ring to prevent damage or loss. For example, when exercising, it is best to take off your ring as the metal can get damaged during activities such as lifting weights or cycling. Similarly, when applying lotions or beauty products, it is advisable to remove your ring to avoid product buildup on the diamonds or gemstones. Intense outdoor heat can also cause your fingers to expand, making the ring feel uncomfortable, so it may be best to leave your ring at home in such conditions.
Finally, it is recommended to have a designated spot for your wedding ring when you are not wearing it, such as a specific drawer in your jewellery box or a small pocket in your purse, to reduce the likelihood of misplacing it. Additionally, consider insuring your wedding ring to provide extra protection in case of loss or damage.
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Wedding ring traditions
The History of Wedding Rings
The wedding ring is one of the oldest marital traditions, with its origins dating back to prehistoric times. One theory suggests that grooms would bind their bride's wrists and ankles with grass to prevent her soul from escaping or running away. This tradition evolved from grass to rope, then leather, and finally to a metal band. Another theory suggests that the ancient Egyptians invented the engagement ring, using braided hemp, reed, or hair, which was later adopted by the ancient Greeks who used materials like bone or ivory. However, the oldest reliable data traces back to the ancient Romans, who used rings as a symbol of a business contract. They placed the ring on the third finger of the left hand, believing it housed the \"Vena Amoris\" or \"Vein of Love\", which ran directly to the heart.
The Diamond Trend
Diamonds are the most common stone used in engagement and wedding rings today, but this trend only gained popularity in the 1700s. The first recorded diamond engagement ring was given in 1477 by the Archduke of Hammond, sparking a trend among those who could afford it. In the 1800s, the discovery of new mines caused diamond prices to drop, making them more affordable and increasing their popularity. In the 1900s, diamond retailer De Beers launched a marketing campaign stating that diamond rings were the ultimate symbol of love, further cementing their popularity.
Wedding Ring Placement
The placement of the wedding ring on the fourth finger of the left hand stems from ancient Greek and Roman beliefs that this finger had a vein connected directly to the heart. This belief is reflected in Christian wedding ceremonies, where priests touch the wedding band to three fingers in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, before sliding it onto the fourth finger. In the Eastern Orthodox Church, wedding rings are traditionally worn on the right hand.
Men's Wedding Rings
The tradition of men wearing wedding bands is a relatively new one. During World War II, soldiers began wearing rings to remind them of their wives back home and as a symbol of their commitment while overseas. This tradition became especially popular among military men and later spread to civilians after the Korean War.
Engagement Ring Traditions
Engagement rings are traditionally given during or shortly after a proposal, with the recipient wearing the ring until the wedding day. The engagement ring is typically more intricate and expensive than the wedding band, featuring a large centre diamond or gemstone. Some cultures, such as India, have a tradition of giving a necklace called a "mangalsutra" during the wedding ceremony instead of or in addition to an engagement ring.
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What to do with wedding rings after a divorce
Dealing with wedding and engagement rings during a divorce can be challenging due to their sentimental value and monetary worth. Here are some options for what to do with wedding rings after a divorce:
Sell Them
Selling wedding and engagement rings can be a way to monetise these assets, especially if one is in need of financial support post-divorce. However, it is important to note that selling diamonds second-hand may only yield about 20% of their original value. It is recommended to have the rings valued by an expert first and to build a relationship with a trusted jeweller or diamond dealer.
Repurpose Them
Another option is to repurpose the rings into new jewellery, either for oneself or to pass down to children. This can be a way to transform a symbol of the past into something new and positive. However, some may be hesitant to alter antique rings or those with significant sentimental value.
Keep Them
Some people choose to keep their wedding rings, either wearing them or storing them away in a memory box. This decision may be influenced by the nature of the divorce, with some feeling that the ring still holds fond memories or symbolises a mutual separation. In some states, engagement and wedding rings are considered gifts that belong to the recipient, providing legal ownership to keep the rings.
Divorce Rings
An emerging trend is the concept of divorce rings, also known as "freedom rings" or "independence rings". These rings symbolise the end of a marriage and the reclaiming of one's autonomy and identity, marking a new chapter in one's life.
Ultimately, there is no right or wrong answer for what to do with wedding rings after a divorce. It is a personal decision that depends on one's thoughts, preferences, and emotional connection to the rings.
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Frequently asked questions
There is no single correct way to wear a wedding ring. Traditionally, the wedding band is worn closest to the heart, with the engagement ring on top. However, it is ultimately a matter of personal preference and style.
You have a few options. You can move your engagement ring to your right hand, or give it to someone you trust, such as your maid of honour, to hold on to during the ceremony. After the ceremony, you can put your engagement ring back on your left hand, either above or below the wedding band.
Keep your ring box on your nightstand and put your ring away at night. Always be mindful of where you put it when you take it off. To protect the finish and shine, avoid wearing it when cleaning, cooking, gardening, or doing anything with harsh chemicals.
You have a few options. You can keep the ring, sell it, or repurpose it into a new piece of jewellery. Using the stones from your ring to create a new piece of jewellery may offer a sense of closure while still preserving the sentimentality of the original ring.
