Rhiannon Hendricks
The role of sponsors in a Catholic wedding is an important one, and there are several requirements that must be met for those who take on this responsibility. In the Catholic Church, sponsors are also referred to as godparents and are expected to guide the couple through the sacrament of matrimony. The number of sponsors varies, with some couples opting for just one pair of sponsors, while others may have up to eight pairs, especially for large weddings. These sponsors are typically close relatives or friends of the couple and are expected to provide financial assistance and gifts, as well as act as witnesses to the marriage.
Characteristics of Sponsors for a Catholic Wedding
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Number of sponsors | Two sets of sponsors: primary and secondary |
| Role | Witnesses to the marriage and sign the marriage contract or certificate |
| Marital status | Primary sponsors don't need to be married, but it is better to choose people who have a successful marriage |
| Relationship with couple | People in the couple's life whom they respect and listen to |
| Attire | Primary sponsors should not wear the colour motif of the bridesmaids and flower girls. Secondary sponsors have more freedom with their attire |
| Seating arrangement | Female primary and secondary sponsors are seated on the left side, while male primary and secondary sponsors are seated on the right side |
| Gifts | Primary sponsors are given special tokens such as wine, premium gift cards, or personalized accessories. Secondary sponsors are given indoor potted plants, engraved pens, or artisanal food items |
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What You'll Learn
The role of sponsors in a Catholic wedding
Sponsors play a significant role in Catholic weddings, particularly in the Philippines, where they are considered essential members of the wedding entourage. The sponsors are typically close relatives or friends of the bride and groom and are chosen based on their relationship with the couple. They are expected to provide guidance, support, and financial assistance to the couple throughout the wedding process and beyond.
There are two types of sponsors in a Catholic wedding: primary sponsors and secondary sponsors. Primary sponsors, also known as principal sponsors or ninongs and ninangs in the Philippines, act as witnesses to the marriage and sign the marriage contract or certificate. They are usually people whom the couple respects and listens to, and they often provide wisdom and advice grounded in their own successful marriages. It is customary for primary sponsors to give gifts to the couple, and they are typically given special tokens of appreciation in return.
Secondary sponsors, on the other hand, have a less prominent role. They are not bound by the same expectations as primary sponsors, and there is no hard rule regarding their marital status. While it is considered auspicious for primary sponsors to be married, there is a superstition that secondary sponsors should be single. Secondary sponsors have more freedom in their attire choices and are often seated behind the primary sponsors during the ceremony.
The selection of sponsors for a Catholic wedding is based on specific criteria. Sponsors must be fully initiated Catholics who have been baptised, confirmed, and have received their first Eucharist. They should lead a life that aligns with the teachings of the Church and be mature enough to fulfil their duties. Additionally, sponsors should not be the parents or legal guardians of the couple and should not be in a romantic relationship with them. It is also recommended that sponsors be of the same gender as their sponsee.
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Requirements to be a sponsor
A sponsor, or godparent, for a Catholic wedding plays a significant role. They are responsible for assisting the newly-baptised person in living a Christian life and fulfilling the obligations of the Catholic faith. Here are the requirements to be a sponsor for a Catholic wedding:
Catholic Faith and Lifestyle
The sponsor must be a fully initiated Catholic who has been baptised, confirmed, and has received their first Eucharist. They should be living their life according to the teachings of the Church. This means that their lifestyle and values should align with those of the Catholic faith.
Marriage
Sponsors must be married in the Catholic Church or in another Church with the permission and dispensation of a bishop. This is a requirement because it is seen as a validation of their commitment to the Catholic faith.
Age and Maturity
Sponsors should be at least 16 years old and demonstrate sufficient maturity to fulfil the role. This ensures they can provide the necessary guidance and support to the couple.
Freedom to Celebrate the Sacraments
Sponsors must be free to celebrate the sacraments and not be bound by any canonical penalty. This means they should not have any restrictions placed on them by the Church that would prevent them from fully participating in the Catholic rituals and practices.
Relationship to the Couple
It is generally advised that a parent, legal guardian, spouse, fiancé(e), boyfriend, or girlfriend of the couple should not serve as a sponsor. This is to ensure impartiality and to allow the sponsor to relate to the couple as "equal in value/dignity", without taking sides.
Gender
It is strongly encouraged that the sponsor be of the same gender as the candidate they are sponsoring. This is often seen as a way to foster a more comfortable and supportive relationship during the marriage preparation process.
It is important to note that these requirements may vary slightly depending on the specific guidelines of a particular Catholic diocese or parish. Additionally, the adult catechumen (the person receiving baptism as an adult) can usually choose their own sponsor, and if they are unable to find one, the parish will assist in finding a qualified sponsor.
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Primary and secondary sponsors
In the Philippines, Catholic weddings have two sets of sponsors: primary and secondary. These sponsors are essential members of the wedding entourage and are usually relatives or close family friends of the couple.
Primary Sponsors
Primary sponsors, also known as principal sponsors, ninongs, and ninangs, act as witnesses to the marriage and sign the marriage contract or certificate. They are people in the couple's lives whom they respect and listen to. It is recommended that couples choose primary sponsors who are married so that they can provide sound advice. However, it is not a requirement, and some couples may prefer to have single primary sponsors. Primary sponsors typically wear formal attire in neutral and subdued tones, such as barongs or tuxedos for men and dresses or gowns in cream or off-white colors for women. They usually provide financial assistance and are given special tokens of appreciation, such as wine, premium gift cards, or personalized accessories.
Secondary Sponsors
Secondary sponsors, also known as veil sponsors, have a less prominent role in the wedding. There is no specific requirement for their marital status, but tradition holds that they should be single. Secondary sponsors have more freedom when it comes to their attire. Women can wear a formal blouse and skirt with a shawl, while men can wear long-sleeved polo shirts in cream or off-white colors with dark slacks. They are typically given more modest gifts, such as indoor potted plants, engraved pens, or artisanal food items.
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Sponsor attire
Sponsors of Catholic weddings should wear formal attire that is respectful and modest. The ceremony is a significant religious event, so your attire should reflect the solemnity of the occasion.
For men, this means a suit or dress pants paired with a dress shirt, tie, and dress shoes. For women, a modest and elegant dress, or a blouse and skirt combination is appropriate. Clothing should be modest and not overly revealing; cleavage should be covered, and skirts or dresses should be knee-length or midi length. Depending on the couple's family or church regulations, women may also want to cover their shoulders or bring a shawl.
If the wedding is during the daytime, men can still wear suits or dress pants with a dress shirt and tie. Women can wear a knee-length dress, a skirt and blouse, or a pantsuit. For a formal daytime wedding, a midi dress, elevated jumpsuit, or floor-length gown are also appropriate. Men can wear a tux for formal events. All colours are okay, and daytime weddings are a great opportunity to have fun with colours and fabrics. Florals are a good option, and you can avoid stiff satin or heavy lace. When it comes to shoes, an elegant sandal or a non-clunky heel is a good choice.
If you come from a specific cultural background where traditional attire is appropriate for such events, you may choose to incorporate elements of your culture into your outfit, as long as it aligns with the expectations of the church or parish and respects the sanctity of the occasion.
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Sponsor gifts
Sponsors play a significant role in Catholic weddings, and choosing gifts for them can be a thoughtful way to express gratitude and celebrate the occasion. Here are some ideas for sponsor gifts that align with Catholic traditions and values:
Religious Items and Icons
A sponsor gift can be a beautiful religious item that the recipient can cherish and use in their spiritual practice. Consider gifting a nativity scene, a wooden crucifix, or an icon depicting the Nativity, the Wedding at Cana, or St. Michael. These items hold symbolic value and can serve as a reminder of the couple's faith and their special day.
Sacramental Gifts
Some sponsors may appreciate gifts related to the sacraments. For example, you could give them a set of unity candles, personalized crosses or plaques, rosaries, or a Papal Marriage Blessing. These items symbolize the couple's commitment to their faith and can be a source of comfort and devotion.
Spiritual Books and Journals
If your sponsor is someone who enjoys reading and introspection, consider gifting them a devotional or a couples' journal. These can be used throughout their married life together and can provide spiritual guidance and reflection. "The 5 Love Languages" is another popular book choice that explores different ways of expressing and receiving love.
Home Altar or Religious Decor
Creating a sacred space in the home is important for many Catholics. A home altar box, including items such as a small crucifix, a statuette of St. Joseph with Jesus, holy water, and sacred images, can be a meaningful gift. Alternatively, you could give individual items such as a nice crucifix or a sacred heart statue to display in their home.
Catholic-Themed Ornaments
Christmas ornaments with religious themes, such as those featuring the Nativity scene or other Catholic imagery, can be a lovely gift. They can become cherished decorations that the couple brings out every year, reminding them of their faith and your thoughtfulness.
Blessings and Monetary Gifts
Sometimes, the best gift is a blessing for the couple's new life together. You can sponsor a Mass in their honor or give them a cash gift to spend as they wish. This could be a practical yet meaningful way to support their future together.
Remember, when choosing a sponsor gift, consider the sponsor's relationship with the couple, their faith, and any specific interests or needs they may have.
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Frequently asked questions
Sponsors are essential members of the wedding entourage and are usually relatives or close family friends of the couple. They act as witnesses to the marriage and sign the marriage contract or certificate. They are also expected to provide financial assistance and gifts to the couple.
Sponsors must be fully initiated Catholics who have been baptised, confirmed, and received their first Eucharist. They should be at least 16 years old and lead a life in accordance with the teachings of the Church. A parent or legal guardian may not serve as a sponsor for their child, and it is generally not advisable for a spouse, fiance(e), boyfriend, or girlfriend to do so either.
In traditional Filipino Catholic weddings, there are two sets of sponsors: primary and secondary. For primary sponsors, you need at least two pairs to sign the marriage contract, but some couples may prefer to have six to eight pairs, especially for large weddings.
