Your Dream Wedding: Choosing The Right Style

what kind of wedding should I have

Planning a wedding can be overwhelming, but deciding on a wedding type will make the experience simpler and more enjoyable. Before you start making your guest list or sending out invitations, you should consider what kind of wedding you want. Do you want a traditional wedding with all the customs and rituals, or would you prefer to forgo tradition and throw an unconventional event that better matches your style and preferences? Do you want a big or small wedding guest list? Do you want a local or destination wedding? These are all important questions to ask yourself when planning your big day.

Characteristics Values
Budget $30,000+
Guest List Size 100-200+ for macro weddings; smaller guest lists for micro weddings
Venue Local or destination
Theme/Aesthetic Rustic, glamorous, traditional, etc.
Type of Ceremony Religious, civil, courthouse, etc.
Reception Dinner, cocktail hour, dancing, etc.
Attire Formal, casual, etc.
Food and Drink Buffet, sit-down dinner, open bar, etc.
Entertainment Music, dancing, games, etc.

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Budget and guest list

When it comes to planning a wedding, the first step is to decide on a budget and guest list. These two factors will determine the style and type of wedding you can have.

Budget

The budget is a crucial consideration as it will dictate what is possible for your wedding. The average wedding costs around $30,000, but this can vary significantly depending on the size and location. If you have a limited budget, you may need to cut down on the guest list or sacrifice certain elements, such as an extravagant venue or floral arrangements.

Guest List

The number of guests you invite will impact the budget and the overall vibe of your wedding. A larger guest list will likely result in a higher budget, especially for catering and venue costs. It's important to consider whether you prefer an intimate gathering or a grand celebration with many guests. A smaller guest list can provide a more exclusive and cosy atmosphere, while a larger guest list can lead to a more vibrant and energetic party.

Priorities

When deciding on your budget and guest list, it's essential to identify your priorities. Consider what is most important to you and your partner. Do you want to honour traditions, create spaces for families to connect, or simply have a fun party? By establishing a clear mission statement, you can align your decisions with your values and ensure that your wedding reflects your unique relationship.

Venue

The type of venue you choose will also depend on your budget and guest list. If you have a large guest list, you will need a venue that can accommodate everyone comfortably. Consider whether you prefer a local or destination wedding, as travel costs for a destination wedding may be a significant expense for your guests.

In summary, deciding on a budget and guest list is a crucial first step in planning your wedding. By considering your financial limitations and the number of guests you want to invite, you can start to narrow down the style and type of wedding that best suits your vision and priorities.

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Venue

When it comes to choosing a wedding venue, there are many factors to consider. Firstly, it's important to decide on a budget and guest list size, as these will impact the venue options available to you. The venue is typically the most expensive part of a wedding, so setting a clear budget is essential.

If you're looking for an intimate setting, a small wedding with just close family and friends might be the right choice. This could be held in a state park, which provides a beautiful natural backdrop for the ceremony and unique photo opportunities. Alternatively, for a more unconventional wedding, you could consider eloping, which is the simplest and cheapest option, as it involves only the couple and eliminates the need for a large venue.

If you're dreaming of a grand celebration, a macro wedding with a large guest list might be your style. These weddings typically have over 100 guests and can go up to 200 or more. Traditional weddings with all the customary rituals and a long guest list might be your preference if you're a social butterfly who loves huge parties. Venues for such weddings could include grand ballrooms or large event spaces.

The style and theme of your wedding will also influence your venue choice. For example, if you're going for a rustic theme, you might want to look at venues like barns or outdoor spaces with natural scenery. On the other hand, if you're envisioning a glamorous wedding, you might opt for a luxurious hotel or country club with elegant decor.

Remember, the venue sets the tone for your special day, so choose one that aligns with your unique style and preferences.

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Traditions and rituals

Something Old, Something New

Derived from an Old English rhyme, this tradition involves the bride carrying four good-luck objects on her wedding day: "something old" to represent the couple's past lives, "something new" to symbolise their future, "something borrowed" from someone happily married in the hope that their good fortune rubs off, and "something blue" to symbolise love and purity.

Handfasting

Handfasting is a Celtic ritual where the bride's and groom's hands are tied together to symbolise their commitment to each other and their new bond as a married couple. This ritual is also practised in Hindu weddings, where it is called "hastmelap".

Breaking a White Ceramic Bell

In Guatemala, it is customary for the mother of the groom to break a white ceramic bell filled with rice and flour when the newlyweds arrive at the reception. This tradition is believed to bring prosperity to the couple.

Blowing the Pū

In Hawaii, the officiant blows the pū, a conch shell horn, at the start of the ceremony or after the newlyweds share their first kiss. This tradition is said to bring good luck and fortune to the couple.

Releasing White Doves

In the Philippines, brides and grooms release a pair of white doves after their wedding to signify a harmonious life together. This ritual is believed to bring peace and blessings to the couple's marriage.

These are just a few examples of the many traditions and rituals you can incorporate into your wedding. Whether you choose to follow cultural customs, create your own rituals, or put a modern twist on old traditions, these practices can add a meaningful and memorable touch to your special day.

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Intimate or boisterous

When it comes to weddings, couples have a wide range of options to choose from, from the venue to the guest list size. One of the key decisions to make is whether to have an intimate or a boisterous wedding.

An intimate wedding is typically characterised by a smaller guest list, usually consisting of close family and friends. This type of wedding offers several advantages, such as a more personalised and meaningful experience for the couple and their guests. With a smaller group, the couple can connect more deeply with their guests and create unique and special moments. Intimate weddings also provide more flexibility in terms of venue selection, as smaller groups can fit into a variety of spaces, including non-traditional venues like museums, gardens, or even a yacht! They can also be more cost-effective, as a smaller guest list often means more room in the budget for decorations, activities, and premium food and drinks.

On the other hand, a boisterous wedding, or a larger wedding, can be a grand celebration with a higher number of guests. This option may be appealing to couples who want to share their special day with a broader group of people, including extended family, friends, and acquaintances. While larger weddings can be more expensive and logistically challenging, they offer a different kind of experience. With more guests, there is a greater opportunity to create a diverse and vibrant atmosphere, with a variety of entertainment options and activities to suit different tastes.

Ultimately, the decision between an intimate or boisterous wedding depends on the couple's preferences and priorities. Some couples may value the opportunity to connect deeply with a smaller group, while others may prefer the excitement and energy of a larger celebration. It's important to consider factors such as budget, venue, and the overall experience the couple wishes to create for themselves and their guests.

To make the decision-making process easier, it is recommended to set a clear budget and outline priorities. This can help guide the planning process and ensure that the wedding aligns with the couple's vision and values.

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Formal or informal

Formal and informal weddings each offer a unique charm and atmosphere, catering to different preferences and priorities. Formal weddings are synonymous with elegance and grandeur, often taking place in upscale venues such as grand ballrooms, historic estates, or luxury hotels. They feature meticulous attention to detail, with opulent décor, lavish floral arrangements, fine china, and crystal stemware. Formal weddings often include live entertainment, such as a live band or string quartet, adding to the sophisticated ambiance. The dress code for a formal wedding is typically elegant, with guests wearing suits and dressier dresses, while the food is usually traditional, such as steak, chicken, or fish, served on real china with nice linens.

On the other hand, informal weddings are all about creating a relaxed and intimate atmosphere. They often take place in casual settings like backyard gardens, rustic barns, or beachside venues, providing a laid-back backdrop. Informal weddings have a more relaxed dress code, with guests wearing attire such as sundresses, khakis, or flowy skirts and linen shirts. The cuisine in an informal wedding is often creative and reflective of the couple's tastes, with options like food trucks, BBQ buffets, or interactive stations.

There is also a middle ground, with semi-formal weddings. These weddings usually feature awesome dinnerware, a side-table buffet, and a few candles and bud vases as decorations. Dessert is served with the ceremony, along with coffee and tea. Semi-formal weddings may forgo music, creating a more relaxed atmosphere.

When deciding between a formal or informal wedding, consider your personal preferences, budget, and priorities. If you prioritize elegance and sophistication, a formal wedding may be your style. However, if you prefer a more relaxed and intimate atmosphere, an informal wedding might be a better fit. Remember, the most important thing is to create a wedding that feels authentic and meaningful to you as a couple.

To help you decide, consider taking a wedding style quiz, which can guide you in determining your dream wedding vibe. Additionally, setting a budget and outlining your priorities are crucial steps in nailing down your wedding style.

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Frequently asked questions

It can be overwhelming to decide on the type of wedding you want. A good first step is to set a budget and outline your priorities. Ask yourself: what is the purpose of your wedding? Is it to honour traditions, bring two families together, or throw the party of the year? Once you have a mission statement, you can plan the rest of your day around it.

There are many types of weddings to choose from. If you're a traditionalist, you might opt for a formal wedding with all the customs and rituals. If you want to focus on your nearest and dearest, you could go for an intimate gathering. Or, if you're looking for something less conventional, you could plan an event that reflects your unique style and preferences.

The number of guests you invite will influence the type of wedding you have. A guest list of 100-200 people is considered a macro wedding, whereas a micro wedding is a smaller, more intimate ceremony. A larger wedding usually means a bigger budget and more stress, so it's essential to consider what's most important to you.

Unique weddings are a chance to express your relationship through the type of celebration you host. Some couples choose to elope, forgoing a traditional wedding for a secret, intimate ceremony. Others might opt for a destination wedding or a theme that reflects their interests, like a rustic fall wedding or a secret garden-inspired celebration.

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