The First Step To Planning A Wedding: Setting The Date

Planning a wedding can be a daunting task, but with the right approach, it can be a fun and enjoyable process. The first step is to set a budget, which will guide all your other decisions. Determine how much you can spend and what you want to spend it on, including the venue, catering, attire, decorations, and so on. This will help you stay on track and avoid overspending. Once you have a budget in place, you can start thinking about the guest list, which will also impact your choice of venue. Consider how many people you want to invite and whether you prefer an intimate gathering or a grand celebration. With these two key pieces of information, you can start researching venues that fit your vision and fall within your budget. From there, you can move on to other aspects, such as choosing a date, selecting a wedding party, and deciding on a theme or style for your special day.

Establish a budget and a timeline

Establishing a budget and a timeline is one of the first steps in planning a wedding. It is critical to set a budget first, as it will affect all subsequent decisions. Here are some steps to help you establish a budget and timeline for your wedding:

Determine the Total Budget:

The first step is to figure out how much you want to spend or can afford to spend on the wedding. This involves assessing your financial situation, including savings and monthly income, and deciding how much you can realistically allocate to the wedding. It is also essential to consider any contributions from family members or friends and discuss how much they are comfortable spending.

Create a Budget Breakdown:

Once you have a total budget, it's time to allocate funds to different categories. Here are some common categories and their average budget percentages to help guide you:

• Venue and catering: 40-45%
• Furniture rental: 10%
• Photography: 10-12%
• Flowers and decor: 10%
• Entertainment: 10%
• Bride and groom attire: 5-9%
• Hairstyling and makeup: 5%
• Cake: 3%
• Stationery/invitations: 3%
• Favors: 2%
• Transportation: 2%
• Extras: 5-15% (for unexpected costs)

Set Priorities:

Not all weddings are alike, and you may have specific items that are more important to you than others. It is essential to sit down with your partner and discuss your priorities. For example, you may want to allocate more funds to a specific venue, a particular band, or a certain type of food. This will help you customize your budget to fit your unique vision.

Research and Compare:

Before finalizing your budget, it is crucial to research the costs of different items. Contact vendors, get quotes, and compare prices. This will help you understand the market rates and make informed decisions about your budget allocations.

Be Flexible and Make Adjustments:

Wedding planning is a dynamic process, and it is essential to remain flexible. As you research and gather information, you may find that certain items are more expensive than you anticipated. Be prepared to make adjustments to your budget allocations or consider alternative options to stay within your overall budget.

Create a Timeline:

Establishing a timeline will help you stay organized and ensure that tasks are completed on schedule. Here are some key steps to creating a wedding timeline:

• Set a tentative wedding date: Choose a few potential dates that work for you and your partner, considering factors such as season, work schedules, and family conflicts.
• Work backwards: Start with the wedding date and work backwards to create a timeline for tasks that need to be completed beforehand.
• Prioritize tasks: Identify the most important tasks that need to be completed first and give them adequate time in your timeline.
• Create a schedule: Break down the planning process into manageable chunks, setting deadlines for each task.
• Be flexible: Remember that timelines can change, and unexpected delays may occur. Build some flexibility into your schedule to accommodate these changes.

By following these steps, you will be well on your way to establishing a comprehensive budget and timeline for your wedding. Remember to stay organized, be flexible, and always keep your unique vision in mind!

Find inspiration and determine your wedding style

Finding inspiration and determining your wedding style is an important step in the wedding planning process. It helps you refine your focus and communicate your vision to vendors effectively.

• Think about the overall look and feel you want for your wedding. Consider the setting, flowers, lighting, textures of your dress or linens, and decide on a distinct wedding style that ties everything together.
• Take a style quiz: The Knot and Brides, for example, offer fun quizzes to help you uncover your dream wedding style. These quizzes can help narrow down the vast world of wedding planning and provide a personalised blueprint for your wedding.
• Consider popular wedding styles: Classic, cultural, glamorous, modern, rustic, and themed weddings are some of the most popular styles. You can also mix and match elements from different styles to create a unique blend that reflects you and your partner's personalities.
• Gather inspiration from various sources: Pinterest, Instagram, magazines, real wedding photos, and wedding trends can spark ideas and help you visualise your dream wedding. Don't overwhelm yourself, but do allow yourself to explore and be inspired.
• Define your priorities: Discuss with your partner what is most important to you both. Is it the food, flowers, music, or something else? Prioritising your must-haves will help guide your planning and keep you focused.
• Create a mood board: Once you have a general idea of your style, start gathering images, colour palettes, and other visual elements that inspire you. A mood board can be a helpful tool for communicating your vision to vendors and keeping your planning on track.
• Be true to yourself: Your wedding should reflect your unique style and personality. Feel free to incorporate signature details, family traditions, or cultural elements that are meaningful to you. Don't be afraid to mix and match styles or add a personal twist to make your wedding truly yours.

Create a guest list

Creating a guest list is one of the first steps in the wedding planning process. It can be a challenging task, but there are several tips to keep in mind to make it easier.

First, it is important to start with a realistic budget. The number of guests will impact your budget, so it is crucial to have a clear idea of how many people you can afford to invite. This will also help determine the size of the venue you will need.

Next, prioritize close loved ones and immediate family members. Think about who absolutely must be there, such as parents, siblings, grandparents, and close friends, and build your list from there. If you have a large guest list, keep in mind that you may not be able to interact with everyone, so consider whether you want to spend time making small talk with lots of people or celebrating with a smaller group.

When deciding whether to include plus-ones, be mindful of your budget and venue capacity. You may choose to only allow plus-ones for your wedding party, engaged couples, or those who live together. Alternatively, you could adopt the approach of "no ring, no bring," where only engaged or married friends receive a plus-one.

It is also a good idea to be considerate of your guests' travel requirements. Consider whether your chosen location is accessible for your guests and if there are any visa rules or convenient flight options.

Finally, don't rush the process. Creating the perfect guest list takes time, and it is important to give it the attention it deserves, as it will impact many other aspects of your wedding planning.

Choose your wedding party

Choosing your wedding party can be one of the most challenging parts of planning a wedding. There are endless logistical and budgetary concerns, not to mention the potential for hurt feelings. Here are some tips to help you choose your wedding party:

Consider the Size of Your Wedding

The size of your wedding party should be proportional to the overall size of your wedding. For a small wedding of 50 people or fewer, it's best to have no more than four bridesmaids and four groomsmen. For a tiny micro-wedding, you might want just a maid of honour and a best man.

Choose the Maid of Honour and Best Man

If you have a clear number-one, ride-or-die best friend, deciding who will be your maid of honour or best man will be easy. If you have many close friends and are having a hard time deciding, you can eliminate these roles altogether and simply choose a group of equal bridesmaids and groomsmen.

Make a List of Who to Ask

Start by making a list of candidates, including family members, especially siblings. If you have a brother or sister you're particularly close to, you might want to ask them to be your maid of honour or best man.

Consider Reliability

Choose friends you know you can count on. The maid of honour and best man are typically responsible for planning events like bridal showers and bachelor parties, as well as making sure you have everything you need on the day. If your chosen candidate isn't super reliable, consider giving this honour to someone else.

Factor in Personalities

All of the individuals in your wedding party don't need to be best friends, but they do need to get along, even if it's just on a superficial level. If you have a friend whose personality can be abrasive, it might be better to avoid the drama and not include them in the wedding party.

Be Mindful of Feelings

There's always a chance that someone's feelings will be hurt if they aren't asked to be part of your wedding party. Try to be conscious of that while remembering that your wedding is ultimately about you and your soon-to-be spouse. There are plenty of other ways for friends and family to be involved in your wedding, such as doing a reading during the ceremony or helping with planning.

Give Your Wedding Party a Heads-Up

Before you send out official invitations or post on social media, ask your potential wedding party members if they want to be included. They might have other commitments, fear public speaking, or simply not want to be in the wedding. Give them a chance to say no, and don't ask them to give you an answer right away.

Be Honest About Your Expectations

Let your wedding party know what their responsibilities will be before, during, and after the wedding. Being in a wedding party is a commitment, and your members should know all of their responsibilities before they agree to be in the wedding.

Choose Drama-Free, Supportive People

Your wedding party should be filled with people who are positive, supportive, and loving of both you and your partner. You should not choose anyone you suspect will be dramatic or demanding—this is your day.

Pick a date and book your venue

Picking a date and booking your venue are two of the most important steps in the wedding planning process. They will help you set the tone for your big day and inspire everything from your colour scheme to your attire. Here are some tips on how to go about it:

Give yourself plenty of time

It's recommended that you book your wedding venue at least nine to twelve months in advance. The most popular locations and dates might be booked up even earlier, so it's important to plan ahead. Allow at least two months for research, tours and decision-making. If you're hoping to get married in a particular season, this will also impact how far in advance you need to start planning.

Narrow down your options

Before you start visiting venues, it's a good idea to have a broad idea of the location, capacity and budget you're looking for. You should also consider the style of venue you want – do you want a ballroom or a barn? A beach or a garden? A modern space or a rustic setting?

Visit your favourite venues

Don't overwhelm yourself by visiting too many venues. Narrow it down to five to seven venues and schedule site visits. During your visit, check out the photography locations, restrooms, parking and accessibility. Envision your celebration in the space and talk to the staff about what matters to you.

Be realistic and flexible

Your dream venue might not be able to accommodate your preferred dates, or there might be construction work happening on-site. Be prepared to be flexible and to adjust your plans if necessary.

Follow up

After your visit, take some time to absorb what you saw and discuss it with your partner. A venue or two might drop off your list at this point. Follow up with the venue manager to ask any further questions and request referrals from clients who have worked with the venue.

Make your decision

When you've found the right venue, double-check that it feels like the right choice and that you feel comfortable and taken care of by the venue managers.

Sign the contract

Once you've made your choice, ask the venue for a contract and go over every line. Watch out for additional costs that might not have been discussed previously, and make sure you understand the cancellation and refund policy. Your date is not officially reserved until the contract is signed.

Frequently asked questions