The Bridesmaid's Inner Circle: Who Is The 'First Lady'?

The first bridesmaid, or 'maid of honour', is typically the bride's closest friend or relative. Historically, bridesmaids were chosen from unmarried young women of marriageable age, and were expected to be the bride's servants, protecting her from evil spirits or bandits. Today, the role of the maid of honour is much less dangerous, and involves planning pre-wedding parties and serving as a point of contact on the wedding day.

The bride's closest friend or sister

The role of the chief bridesmaid, or maid of honour, is often given to the bride's closest friend or sister.

The role of the maid of honour is steeped in tradition, and today's duties are a far cry from those of years gone by. In ancient Rome, for example, bridesmaids were tasked with protecting the bride from evil spirits or bandits. They would dress similarly to the bride to confuse any ill-wishers. In some cultures, such as Victorian Britain, bridesmaids were small girls rather than grown women.

Nowadays, the maid of honour is the bride's right-hand woman. She is responsible for leading the bridal party through the planning of any pre-wedding events, such as the bridal shower and the bachelorette party. She also provides practical and emotional support to the bride on the wedding day.

The maid of honour is often the bride's closest friend or sister, and she is chosen because of her close relationship with the bride. The role is a position of honour and trust, and the maid of honour is relied upon to help the bride with any number of tasks, big or small, in the lead-up to the wedding and on the day itself.

The maid of honour

History

The role of the maid of honour has changed over time. Historically, the maid of honour was an attendant to royalty and was considered the bride's "favourite". In biblical times, the maid of honour was a servant or domestic worker who catered to the bride's every need on her wedding day. In ancient Rome, the maid of honour was tasked with protecting the bride from evil spirits or bandits. Brides were often targets for robbers due to the dowries they brought with them, and so the maid of honour served as a decoy so that bandits wouldn't know who the actual bride was.

Modern Day

Nowadays, the role of the maid of honour is less dangerous! She is still the bride's right-hand woman, but her duties include planning pre-wedding parties and serving as a point of contact on the wedding day. The maid of honour is responsible for leading the rest of the bridal party through the planning of any pre-wedding events, such as the bridal shower and the bachelorette party. On the day of the wedding, her main duty is to provide practical and emotional support to the bride.

Cultural Variations

In some cultures, such as Norway, the Netherlands, France, and Victorian Britain, it is customary for bridesmaids to be young girls rather than grown women. In modern English-speaking countries, this role is separate from that of the bridesmaid, and the child performing it is known as a flower girl.

In North America, the maid of honour is the bride's chief attendant, while in the United Kingdom, the term "maid of honour" originally referred to the female attendant of a queen. The influence of American English has led to the chief bridesmaid sometimes being called the maid of honour in the UK as well.

The matron of honour

The first of the bridesmaids is called the matron of honour, or the maid of honour if she is unmarried. The matron/maid of honour is also the bride's chief bridesmaid.

In the past, the role of the matron of honour was very different. In biblical times, for example, the matron of honour was a domestic worker who catered to the bride's every need. She was also responsible for carrying the monetary portion of the bride's dowry, which put her at great risk of thieves. In ancient Rome, bridesmaids and the matron of honour wore similar outfits to the bride to confuse evil spirits or bandits.

Today, the matron of honour is still the bride's right-hand woman, but her duties are less dangerous! She is usually the bride's closest friend and is responsible for planning pre-wedding parties and serving as a point of contact on the wedding day.

Junior bridesmaid

A junior bridesmaid is a girl who is too young to be married but who is included as a bridesmaid at a wedding anyway. Junior bridesmaids are not a new phenomenon, as it was once customary in Norway, the Netherlands, France, and Victorian Britain for bridesmaids to be small girls rather than grown women. In modern English-speaking countries, the role of a junior bridesmaid is separate from that of the bridesmaid, and the small child performing it is known as a flower girl.

In some cultures, the bride and all the bridesmaids used to wear exactly the same dress and veil their faces heavily to confuse jealous suitors and evil spirits. In ancient Rome, it was believed that bad spirits would descend upon weddings, so the bridesmaids wore similar outfits to the bride to confuse the evildoers.

In China during the feudal era, brides were susceptible to kidnapping at weddings by rival clans and hooligans. Bridesmaids were dressed like the bride to lower the risk of her being identified and taken.

The bride's attendant

On the day of the wedding, the bride's attendant's principal duty is to provide practical and emotional support to the bride. She might assist the bride with dressing and help her manage her veil, bouquet, or the train of her wedding dress. In a double-ring wedding, the chief bridesmaid is often entrusted with the groom's wedding ring until the ceremony. The bride's attendant may also be asked to sign the marriage license as a legal witness. If there is a reception after the wedding, she may be requested to offer a toast to the newlyweds.

The duties and costs associated with being a bride's attendant can vary. While modern bridesmaids typically cover their own travel and accommodation expenses, it has become customary for the bride to present her attendants with gifts as a token of gratitude for their support and financial commitment. It is also common for prospective attendants to ask about the expected time, energy, and monetary requirements before accepting the role.

In some cultures and historical contexts, bridesmaids were not chosen based on their relationship with the bride but were instead domestic workers or servants who catered to the bride's needs. In ancient times, bridesmaids wore similar outfits to the bride to confuse jealous suitors and evil spirits and protect the bride from harm.

Frequently asked questions