Lyla Dejesus
Indian weddings are known for their elaborate, week-long celebrations, filled with rituals and games that bring a joyful atmosphere and unite the families of the newlyweds. One such game is fishing for rings, where the couple searches for a ring in a vessel of coloured water, milk, or rose petals. The winner of the game is believed to dominate the married life. Another ring-based game is find the finger, where the groom must find the bride's ring finger to put on the wedding ring. These games are a fun way to break the ice and bring merriment to the wedding, as well as serving a symbolic purpose, such as teaching the groom patience and the need for perseverance in his marriage.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Purpose | To break the ice, bring families together, and ensure the bride feels comfortable in her new environment |
| Location | India |
| Participants | Bride, Groom, Family members, Guests |
| Variants | "Aeki Beki" (Gujarati), "Fishing for rings" (Tamil), "Find the finger", "Mehndi maize", "Jugalbandi", "Sing Tappe", "Ponkvu or Ponkhana ceremony" (Gujarati), "Sainth" (Sindhi), "Joota chipai" (Punjabi), "Hiding the slippers", "Bashi biye" (Bengali) |
| Rules/Objectives | Varies depending on the game; for example, in "Aeki Beki", the winner is the person who finds the ring in a vessel filled with coloured water four out of seven times. In "Fishing for rings", the winner is the person who finds the ring first. |
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What You'll Learn
'Fishing for rings' in a bowl of milk
Indian weddings are known for their grandeur and extravagance, with celebrations lasting up to a week. An essential part of the festivities includes traditional wedding games, which serve to break the ice between the newlywed couple and their families, fostering a comfortable and enjoyable atmosphere. One such popular game, "Fishing for Rings", involves the couple searching for their wedding rings in a bowl of milk, often accompanied by other items such as rose petals, flowers, vermilion, and other objects. This game is believed to foretell who will dominate the marriage, with the first person to find their ring deemed to rule the household.
The "Fishing for Rings" game has several variations. In one version, the couple is asked to remove their rings and place them in a bowl of clear water. They then churn the water vigorously, and the ring that remains at the bottom predicts the dynamic of their relationship. If the bride's ring lags, she is expected to be a submissive wife, while the opposite foretells a dominant role for the groom. Another method involves placing the rings in a bowl filled with milk or rose petals, challenging the couple to find their rings without looking.
The game is often played after the "Grah Pravesh" ceremony, when the new bride enters her marital home. It is a fun and lighthearted moment shared between the couple, offering a respite from the tedious rituals and lengthy ceremonies of Indian weddings. The game is not limited to a specific region or community, being practised in various parts of India, including Uttarakhand, Punjab, Haryana, Tamil Nadu, Karnataka, and Delhi.
Indian weddings are steeped in tradition and cultural significance, with rituals varying according to religion, region, and community. While "Fishing for Rings" is a common game, other unique rituals include the Punjabi tradition of "hiding the slippers," where the groom's slippers are hidden, and he must pay a ransom for their return. Another ritual, the betel leaf game, involves the couple competing to grab the most betel leaves in a set time, signifying dominance and generosity in the relationship. These games add a playful element to the celebrations, creating lasting memories for the couple and their families.
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'Aeki Beki' or Ponkvu
Aeki Beki is a game played at Gujarati weddings to welcome the bride to her new home and make her feel comfortable in her new household. The game involves placing several silver coins and a ring in a bowl of water and milk. The bride and groom then search for the ring, and it is believed that whoever finds the ring first will rule the marriage. Some sources say that the winner of the game will dominate the family, while others state that they will be in control of the family. According to one source, the couple must find the ring four times, and whoever succeeds in doing so four out of seven times will lead the household.
Ponkvu is another Gujarati wedding ritual where the groom is welcomed by the bride's family. The groom is met by the bridal party, including the bride's mother, who performs an aarti and applies a tika on his forehead. The mother then playfully tries to pull the groom's nose, while he tries to evade her. This ritual serves as a reminder to the groom to remain humble and grateful.
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'Mehndi maize'
Indian weddings are known for their elaborate and colourful celebrations, which can go on for up to a week. Traditional wedding games are a key part of the festivities, providing a break from tedious rituals and helping the bride, groom, and their families to get to know each other and bond. One such game is 'Mehndi maize'.
Mehndi maize is played across various parts of India. Before the wedding, the bride has her bridal mehndi (henna) done, ensuring that the groom's name is inscribed within the intricate patterns. The groom is then tasked with finding his name in the henna design, and the festivities cannot continue until he does so. This game is not only fun, but it also symbolises the need for patience and commitment in the marriage.
There are many variations of this game. In some regions, the groom is asked to hold the bride's hands and search for his name by touch, while in others, he must simply look for his name without touching her hands. The henna artists often make the patterns as intricate and difficult as possible, adding to the challenge.
In another version of the game, the bride takes it a step further by hiding her groom's name within the henna design, making it even harder for him to find. The groom must then search for his name after the marriage, and if he fails to find it quickly, he is said to be in serious trouble! This variation adds an element of excitement and suspense to the game.
Mehndi maize is a fun and interactive way to involve the bride and groom in the wedding celebrations and create lasting memories. It is a testament to the creativity and joy that Indian weddings are known for.
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'Jooti chupai'
Indian weddings are known for their elaborate, week-long celebrations. Traditional wedding games are an integral part of the festivities, adding a dash of fun and playfulness to the rituals. One such popular game is "Jooti Chupai", also known as "Hiding the Shoes".
Jooti Chupai is a lighthearted custom where the bride's sisters, cousins, and friends take on the role of playful thieves, stealing the groom's shoes while he makes his way to the Mandap barefoot, as per South Asian custom. The groom's family tries to thwart the shoe-stealing attempt, creating a jovial atmosphere filled with banter and negotiation.
The stolen shoes are then hidden discreetly, and the bride's side demands a handsome ransom for their return. This tradition is not just about teasing and fun; it symbolically challenges the groom's worth and status, represented by his footwear. The groom and his family must pay a sum to retrieve the shoes, fostering a bond between the bride's family and their new jijaji (brother-in-law).
Jooti Chupai is not mandatory and may vary based on regional customs and preferences. It aims to bring both families together in a shared moment of laughter and fun, highlighting their love and acceptance of each other. This game is a playful way to strengthen the bond between the two families and create lasting memories filled with joy and mischief.
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'Find the finger'
"Find the finger" is a wedding game that is part of a Tamil wedding ritual. The game involves the bride grouping and folding the fingers of one hand, covering them with her other hand, except for the tips of her folded fingers. She then presents her fingertips to the groom, who has to find her ring finger so he can put on the wedding ring. The bride can make this as difficult as possible for the groom, signifying that life won't always be smooth and simple, and one has to embrace uncertainty.
This game is similar to other Indian wedding games, where the bride and groom compete to find a ring hidden in a vessel filled with coloured water, milk, turmeric, and other objects. In one variation, called Aeki Beki, several coins and a ring are placed in the vessel, and whoever finds the ring four out of seven times is deemed to rule the household. Another similar game involves the bride getting her bridal mehndi done and ensuring that her groom's name is inscribed somewhere in the design. After marriage, the groom has to find where his name is hidden.
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