A Yemeni Wedding: Traditions And Customs

Yemeni weddings are joyful celebrations and opportunities for socialising. They are also a chance to showcase regional customs and traditions, which may seem strange to Western visitors. In Yemeni society, men and women are strictly separated in daily life, so a young man has little chance to meet women. Therefore, it is common for parents to select their children's spouses. The mother and father of the groom work together to find a suitable bride, and once a choice is made, the father and son visit the bride's family to discuss the matter. The bride price is decided upon, and a betrothal feast is held. The wedding celebrations last for at least three days, with the most important part, Laylat az-Zaffa, taking place on Friday. The celebrations include a lavish feast, with several sheep and possibly a calf purchased for the meal, and guests may number over a hundred.

Yemeni wedding customs and practices vary across the country

The mother and father of the groom must work together when looking for a bride, as each knows one half of the neighbouring families. Once the mother has formed her opinion, she confers with her husband, who knows the male side of the family. When both parents agree, they consult their son. A day is then set for the father and son to visit the bride's family to discuss the matter. This gives the bride, who usually knows what the visit means, the chance to see her suitor. The father of the groom will then make his suggestion or choice, and the bride's father will ask for time to think it over and discuss it with his family, including his daughter. Once all parties are in agreement, a time is set for the betrothal.

The betrothal feast is held on a Thursday or Friday, with the groom and his father visiting the bride's father, bringing raisins, qat, and other gifts, including an engagement ring and clothes for the mother and daughter. The bride price is also decided upon, with the father of the groom paying the majority of it. This is later spent on jewellery and clothes for the bride, which remain her private property, even after divorce. The betrothal ceremony is informal and verbal, and the parties agree on a time by which the money will be saved.

The wedding lasts for at least three days, starting on a Wednesday when the marriage contract is signed and concluded in the bride's house. The qadi, an Islamic scholar of the law, oversees the ceremony. The bride and groom then exchange rings, and the festivities begin. The celebrations include a procession that announces the couple's wedding, with guests dancing and singing traditional songs. The bride and groom wear traditional costumes, with the groom carrying a golden sword. A lavish wedding feast is prepared, with several sheep and possibly a calf purchased for the meal.

While some customs are universal, such as the separation of men and women during the celebrations, Yemeni wedding customs vary across the country. For example, in the outlying provincial areas and cities, women had not worn Indigo-dyed dresses for some time, whereas in other parts of the country, these dresses were still worn. Additionally, what is allowed and preferred in one region may not be the same as in another, even in the capital city of Sana'a.

The bride and groom are chosen by their parents

In Yemeni society, daily life is based on a strict separation of the sexes, which means that young men have little to no chance of meeting women. As a result, the bride and groom are chosen by their parents. When a young man is considered old enough to marry, usually around 17 to 19 years old, his mother and father will work together to find a suitable partner for him, often from their extended family. The mother will be particularly involved in this process as she will be familiar with the women in the neighbourhood and will be able to gather information about potential brides.

Once the parents have formed an opinion, they will consult their son. A day will then be set for the father and son to visit the house of the prospective bride to discuss the matter. This gives the future bride, who usually already knows the purpose of the visit, the chance to see her suitor. She may even serve tea or qishr to the visitors, although she will remain heavely veiled. It is likely that she will know more about him than he knows about her, as men are more visible in public.

Once the father of the groom has made his suggestion or choice, the potential father-in-law will ask for some time to think it over and discuss it with his family, including his daughter. Once all parties are in agreement, a time is fixed for the betrothal. The betrothal feast is usually held on a Thursday or Friday, with the groom's father and male friends or relatives visiting the bride's family with gifts. The engagement ring is then handed over to the bride's father, along with clothes for the mother and daughter, and dates for the wedding are discussed. The bride price is also decided upon, which is later spent on jewellery and clothes for the bride and remains her private property.

The betrothal ceremony is informal and verbal, and is considered a firm promise between the two families. The wedding celebrations will last for at least three days, with the marriage contract signed and concluded in the bride's house on the Wednesday afternoon. The groom asks his future father-in-law for his daughter's hand in marriage, and the qadi, an Islamic scholar of the law, asks the father if his daughter agrees to the arranged marriage. The ceremony reaches its peak when the father of the groom throws a handful of raisins onto the carpet, which guests try to catch as signs of a happy future for the couple.

The bride price is spent on the bride's clothes and jewellery

Yemeni weddings are a joyful celebration and a welcome opportunity for a social gathering. While many Yemeni wedding customs may seem strange to a Western visitor, one thing that unites cultures around the world is the importance of clothes and jewellery for the bride. In Yemeni culture, the bride's family receives a 'bride price' from the groom's family, which is later spent on jewellery and clothes for the bride. This jewellery is not just decorative—it is a display of wealth and a form of insurance for the bride's future.

The bride price is a sum of money that the husband, or more specifically, the husband's family, presents to the bride or her family. In Yemeni culture, the bride price is paid by the father of the groom to the father of the bride. The money is then used to purchase jewellery and clothes for the bride. This jewellery is considered the private property of the bride, which remains entirely hers even after a divorce.

The jewellery is typically made from silver, as gold is considered the metal of the devil in Muslim culture and is believed to bring misfortune. The more silver jewellery a bride has, the more successful her marriage is believed to be. The weight of the jewellery can amount to several pounds, with necklaces, bracelets, rings, and a special headband called a gorgush or a beaded headdress called a gargush adorned with antique coins, pearls, and beads.

The bride's clothes are traditionally colourful, with bright colours like green, yellow, purple, and pink being preferred. The dress is often embellished with embroidery, featuring silver or golden thread. This embroidery is a dying art, with only a few areas of Yemen still producing medium-quality hand embroidery during the 1980s. The bride's dress is an important aspect of the wedding, with the amount of jewellery and the quality of the dress speaking to the wealth of the bride's family.

In addition to the bride price, the groom's family also provides clothes for the mother of the bride. This exchange of gifts and the subsequent purchase of jewellery and clothing for the bride are significant aspects of Yemeni wedding traditions, ensuring that the bride enters her married life with a sense of financial security and style.

The wedding lasts for three days

Yemeni weddings are a joyful celebration and an opportunity for a social gathering. The wedding is a three-day celebration, usually starting on a Wednesday and ending on Friday, which is the free day of the week in Yemen.

On the first day, the marriage contract is signed and concluded in the bride's house. The groom and the father of the bride sit opposite each other in the presence of a qadi, an Islamic scholar of the law. The groom asks the father of the bride: "Will you give me your daughter in marriage?" and the father answers: "Yes, I will give you my daughter to wife." The qadi then asks the father if his daughter agrees to the arranged marriage. The groom and the father then clasp right hands, and the qadi lays a white cloth over their hands and recites the fatiha, the first sura of the Koran. The ceremony concludes with the groom throwing a handful of raisins onto the carpet, which the guests try to catch as they are considered signs of a happy future for the couple.

The second day of the wedding is the most important and most public part of the celebrations. The day starts early with butchers preparing meat for the wedding feast, which usually includes several sheep and sometimes a calf. Guests start arriving in the morning, and it is common for women from the neighbourhood to bring their kitchen utensils to help with the preparations. The men go to the mosque to pray before returning for the midday meal. The groom, wearing a traditional brand-new costume and carrying a golden sword, is accompanied by dancing and singing men. After the meal, the guests relax and chew qat, a flowering plant native to the region, and smoke the narghile, a type of hookah. Incense burners are passed around, and a man recites old poems, reminding the couple of their Islamic duties and wishing them a happy married life. There is also music and singing, with a man playing the lute and guests using hand drums and cymbals.

On the third day, the guests continue to celebrate with music, dancing, and singing. The couple cuts the cake, and the bride tosses her bouquet. There is also a buffet with a wide variety of food, including salads, meats, stews, sweets, and other Arab cuisine dishes. The bride and groom usually leave the wedding early, but the guests continue the festivities.

The wedding includes a procession, music, and dancing

Yemeni weddings are colourful and joyous celebrations, often lasting three days, with men and women separated during the festivities. The wedding includes a procession, music, and dancing.

The zaffa, or wedding procession, announces the couple's wedding loudly and differs from region to region. In Yemen, the procession is accompanied by drums and singing. The groom wears a traditional brand-new costume and carries a golden sword. The wedding party dances and sings as they accompany the groom on his way to the mosque for midday prayers and the wedding ceremony.

After the ceremony, the celebrations continue with music and dancing. A man plays the lute and sings wedding songs, sometimes accompanied by other guests using hand drums or cymbals. The guests also chew qat, a mild stimulant, and smoke the narghile, or water pipe. A poet recites old poems, reminding the couple of their Islamic duties and wishing them a long and happy life.

The wedding festivities are also an opportunity for the women of the neighbourhood to gather and socialise. They arrive to help with the preparations, bringing their kitchen utensils. They dance and sing together, and a woman draws temporary henna tattoos on the bride's and guests' skin.

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