Arabic weddings are lavish, multi-day celebrations rich in tradition, with roots in Bedouin culture. The marriage process usually starts with a Tulba or Tolbe, where the groom and his family formally ask the bride's family for her hand in marriage. This is followed by an engagement ceremony, and then a series of pre-wedding events, including the Radwa, a small gathering to ensure the women are pleased with the event, and the Henna night, where the bride and her female friends and relatives gather to decorate their hands and feet with henna. The wedding ceremony, or Nikah, involves the signing of a marriage contract, witnessed by the eldest men from each family. The wedding reception, or Walima, is hosted by the groom's family and includes a grand entrance or Zaffa, a sword dance, and a variety of food and entertainment.
What You'll Learn
- The Tulba/Tolbe: the groom and his family formally ask the bride's family for her hand in marriage
- Henna night: a pre-wedding celebration where the bride and her female friends and relatives eat, drink, dance and decorate their skin with henna
- The wedding reception: a grand celebration with music, food and dancing, hosted by the groom's family
- The Zaffa: a procession that announces the couple's wedding, with drummers, dancers and a grand entrance
- The Ferdah: a final, smaller celebration exclusive to the couple's closest family members
The Tulba/Tolbe: the groom and his family formally ask the bride's family for her hand in marriage
The Tulba/Tolbe is a pre-wedding ceremony and a significant part of Arabic wedding traditions. This event is more private and intimate, limited to the close relatives of the bride and groom. It occurs after both families have approved the couple's decision to wed.
During the Tulba/Tolbe, the groom, along with his family members, formally asks the bride and her family for her hand in marriage. This is a significant step as it marks the families' official acknowledgement and blessing of the union. The ceremony is usually held at the bride's house, where the groom's family visits to express their intentions.
If the families give their blessing, a short prayer from the Holy Quran, "Surah Al-Fatiha", is recited by everyone present. This is an important spiritual moment that unites the families in celebration of the upcoming marriage. Following the prayer, a presentation of tea, coffee, or cordial, along with sweets, is shared between the families. This act of sharing a meal symbolises the coming together of the two families and fosters a sense of unity and hospitality.
The Tulba/Tolbe is a cherished tradition in Arabic culture, honouring the importance of family consent and blessings in a marriage. It sets the tone for the upcoming wedding celebrations and strengthens the bond between the couple and their families.
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Henna night: a pre-wedding celebration where the bride and her female friends and relatives eat, drink, dance and decorate their skin with henna
Henna night, also known as Ghomrah, is a pre-wedding celebration that usually takes place the night before the wedding. It is a time for the bride to gather with her female friends and relatives to eat, drink, dance, and decorate their skin with henna. In Old Palestine, the henna night was also used to prepare wedding decorations and make last-minute arrangements, as well as an opportunity for the families to celebrate together before the wedding.
During the henna night, the bride and her guests have their palms and feet painted with intricate patterns of henna by a female henna artist. This tradition is said to have originated in Ancient Egypt, with the legend of the goddess Isis collecting the body parts of her murdered husband, Osiris, and her hands becoming stained with his blood. Thus, red hands are seen as a symbol of a wife's loyalty and true love for her husband.
In addition to the henna decorations, there are other unique traditions that take place during the henna night. These include dances with the bride, the singing of henna night songs, and the زغرودة / zaghroodah, the high-pitched ululation made by Arab women during celebrations. Sugar cubes are also offered to unmarried girls, who eat them in the hope of becoming the next bride. Another tradition involves pinching the bride's knee and saying "قرصة ركبتها من أجل الزواج من بعدها في نفس الأسبوع" / "qarsat rukbatuhaa min ʼajl azzawaaj min baʻdahaa fee nafs alʼusbooʻ ", which translates to "I pinch her knee in order to marry after her in the same week."
The henna night is a significant part of Arabic wedding traditions, providing an opportunity for the bride to celebrate with her female loved ones and adorn themselves with beautiful henna designs. It is considered a joyous and important occasion, with some Egyptian women even regarding it as the real wedding.
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The wedding reception: a grand celebration with music, food and dancing, hosted by the groom's family
Arabic weddings are lavish affairs, rich in tradition, and often influenced by Bedouin customs and Islamic traditions. The wedding reception, known as the Walima, is a grand celebration hosted and paid for by the groom's family. It is a time for both families to come together and celebrate the union of the newlyweds.
The reception is an extravagant affair, with a spacious dance floor and delicious food. The festivities often include a DJ or live music, with traditional Arabic songs and dances such as the Dabke. Professional dancers and guests alike participate in the energetic and joyful performances. The traditional dance involves participants forming a lively line and performing synchronised steps, creating a captivating visual spectacle.
Arabic wedding receptions feature a buffet-style setup with a variety of dishes honouring Arab cuisine. The spread typically includes meats, stews, salads, fruits and sweets. Dishes such as falafel, hummus, baklava and baba ghannouj are commonly served. A unique aspect of the reception is the cake-cutting ceremony, where the bride and groom use a large sword, often a family heirloom, to cut the wedding cake.
The Walima is a time for celebration and community. It is not uncommon for the entire community to rally behind the couple, showcasing the solidarity and shared joy that mark Arabic weddings. The sense of collective responsibility and togetherness is a cherished aspect of these weddings, with neighbours, friends and distant relatives all playing crucial roles.
The wedding reception is also a time for the couple to receive well-wishes and blessings from their families. In strict Muslim families, there may be separate areas for men and women, with female guests and children entering the hall with the couple. After the women cover their shoulders, male family members may enter the hall, and families take turns visiting the couple to offer congratulations and gifts.
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The Zaffa: a procession that announces the couple's wedding, with drummers, dancers and a grand entrance
The Zaffa is a procession that announces the couple's wedding with drummers, dancers and a grand entrance. It is a staple of Arabic weddings, with roots in ancient Egyptian tradition that predate Islam. The Zaffa is a musical pageant of bendir drums, bagpipes, horns, flaming swords and belly dancers.
The Zaffa begins before the bride and groom arrive at the reception hall. The troupe of dancers and musicians perform for about 30 minutes, welcoming the couple into the hall and leading them to their seats. The Zaffa ends with a party, loud noises and then dinner. The procession is often preceded by a "pre-zaffa", where the wedding procession cruises the streets, with the newlyweds leading the way to the reception hall in a decorated car. The Zaffa is also known as a wedding march.
The Zaffa differs from region to region. For example, in Egypt, the Dumiyati Zaffa is popular in the north, while in the Levant, the traditional Dabkeh is performed. The Dabkeh is the traditional Arabic wedding dance, with professional dancers and guests alike taking part. The Dabkeh leader begins the dance, with the rest of the dancers following and mirroring their leader's every movement. The Zaffa is also a chance for the groom to see the bride in her dress for the first time.
The Zaffa is a high-energy entrance, with the bride and groom following the performers and inviting their guests to join in the dance. The couple then move their rings from their right to left hands to signal their union.
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The Ferdah: a final, smaller celebration exclusive to the couple's closest family members
The Ferdah is the final celebration of an Arabic wedding, reserved exclusively for the couple's closest family members and relatives. This party usually takes place at the bride's family home, where the bride's family plays host, while the groom's family presents fruits and nuts as a gift.
The Ferdah is a smaller gathering, but no less lively than the other parties during the wedding process. It is a time for the newlyweds to celebrate their union with their nearest and dearest, marking the end of the wedding festivities.
Arabic weddings are known for their lavish and colourful celebrations, lasting several days with numerous pre-wedding and post-wedding events. The Ferdah is the last of these celebrations, providing an intimate setting for the couple to connect with their closest family members.
The Ferdah is a time for the family to come together and celebrate the new union, offering a more low-key setting for the couple to relax and spend quality time with their loved ones before embarking on their married life together.
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Frequently asked questions
Arabic weddings are based on Bedouin traditions, an Islamic wedding ceremony absent of any foreign influences.
The Tulba or Tolbe is a formal asking of the bride's hand in marriage. The groom and his family visit the bride's home and ask her family for her hand in marriage.
The henna night is a pre-wedding tradition where the bride and her female friends and relatives gather to celebrate. The bride and her guests have their palms and feet painted with henna in intricate patterns.
The Mahr is a gift, usually gold, that the groom pays to the bride. In the event of a divorce, she keeps the gift.
The Walima is the wedding party, hosted by the groom's family. It involves the married couple's families and can be an extravagant event that includes a DJ or live music, a giant dance floor and delicious food.