Civil Wedding: The Process Explained

A civil wedding is a non-religious, legal marriage ceremony performed by a government official or functionary. The ceremony is presided over by a legal official, such as a judge, magistrate, justice of the peace, county or court clerk, or notary public, and the marriage will be recognised by the state. The couple must exchange vows and sign a register, with two witnesses and the registrar present. A civil wedding ceremony offers the freedom to personalise the proceedings with meaningful readings, music selections, and decorative elements.

A non-religious, legal marriage

Civil ceremonies are typically shorter than religious weddings, usually lasting between 20 and 30 minutes. They follow a basic structure: processional, call to order/opening remarks, vows, ring exchange and other unity gestures, pronouncement, kiss, closing remarks, and recessional. Couples must exchange vows and sign a register or certificate to ensure they are legally married. This must be done in the presence of the officiant and two witnesses. Some countries, like the US and the UK, require a marriage license issued by local civil authorities.

Civil ceremonies can be held in a variety of locations, including courthouses, beaches, parks, banquet halls, hotels, and other approved venues. The specific requirements and restrictions may vary depending on the location and local laws. For example, in the UK, civil ceremonies cannot include hymns, religious readings, or prayers, and must take place at a registered or licensed venue. On the other hand, civil ceremonies in the US may be subject to similar requirements as religious ceremonies, including venue reservation fees and marriage license fees.

Couples choosing a civil ceremony have the freedom to personalise their wedding with unique vows, readings, music, and decorative elements. They can incorporate special touches like custom aisle runners, flower arrangements, and meaningful songs or poems. The attire for a civil ceremony can also be more relaxed and personalised, allowing couples to choose an outfit that complements the mood and style of their special day.

A government official presides

A civil wedding is a non-religious, legal marriage ceremony. It is presided over by a government official and is recognised in all 50 states. In the United States, civil ceremonies may be performed by town, city, or county clerks, judges, justices of the peace, or others with the legal authority to support the marriage as the wedding officiant.

The exact requirements vary from state to state, but generally, the official will be a legal official such as a judge, magistrate, justice of the peace, county or court clerk, or notary public. The couple must ensure that their chosen official is compliant with performing a wedding. This can be done by checking with the local marriage license bureau or municipal county clerk's office.

The civil ceremony will follow the same basic structure as a religious ceremony: processional, call to order/opening remarks, vows, ring exchange and other unity gestures, pronouncement, kiss, closing remarks, and recessional. The couple will have the freedom to make the ceremony their own, writing their own vows and including special readings, music selections, unity symbols, and rituals.

The ceremony will be short, usually lasting between 20-30 minutes. It will include the exchange of legal vows and the signing of the marriage register. There will be a pre-marriage meeting with the official to ensure all details for the marriage certificate are confirmed. The couple must also ensure they have the correct documentation, which may include a photo ID, birth certificate, and proof of citizenship or passport. If either person has been married before, they will need to provide proof of divorce.

Signing the register

The signing of the register is a crucial part of a civil wedding ceremony. While the specifics may vary slightly depending on the location and the couple's preferences, here is an overview of what typically happens during this special moment.

The signing of the register, also known as signing the marriage schedule, is a significant step in the civil wedding ceremony. It usually takes place shortly after the couple has exchanged their vows. This marks the official start of their married life together and is a legally binding moment. While the traditional register was once signed, since 4th May 2021, the process has moved online. Now, the couple signs an A4 piece of paper, the 'Marriage Schedule', and all the information is entered online later. This change has removed some restrictions on photography, allowing photographers to capture this moment more freely.

The marriage schedule is typically signed by the couple and two witnesses, who can be close friends or family members. In some cases, the registrar or officiant may also be included in the signing ceremony. It is worth noting that, unlike religious weddings, there is no presentation of the marriage certificate during a civil ceremony, and couples will receive their certificate later through the post or by picking it up in person.

The signing of the register is a solemn moment, with the focus purely on the task at hand. It is an important part of the ceremony, as it is the legal confirmation of the marriage. While there may be posed shots taken with a 'dummy' register, photographers often capture natural images of the couple and witnesses during the signing. The atmosphere is usually warm and intimate, with the couple surrounded by their loved ones.

The civil wedding ceremony offers flexibility and personalisation, and the signing of the register is no exception. The couple can choose to include decorative elements, such as flowers or a custom aisle runner, to enhance the setting. They may also select meaningful music to be played during this time, creating a unique and intimate atmosphere.

In summary, the signing of the register is a pivotal moment in a civil wedding ceremony, marking the legal recognition of the marriage. While the process has evolved with the move to online registration, it remains a significant and memorable part of the celebration, allowing the couple to officially declare their commitment to each other.

Venue options

Civil weddings can be held almost anywhere, from a beach to a greenhouse, and even a garden roof! The world is your oyster when it comes to venue options.

In the UK, civil ceremonies can only take place at venues approved to host civil marriages. However, there are still plenty of unique wedding venues to choose from, including charming country houses, rustic barns, elegant hotels, cosy restaurants, and historic buildings. If you're looking for a venue with a view, you might opt for a rooftop location with a view of Big Ben or London Bridge.

If you're planning to tie the knot in a courthouse or city hall, you'll need to make a reservation and plan accordingly. Some courthouses are booked far in advance, so it's best to make your appointment as soon as possible.

For those planning a civil ceremony in Scotland, Northern Ireland, and the Channel Islands, you can get married almost anywhere, as long as you have the officiant's agreement.

In the US, some states require you to make one appointment for your marriage license and another for your ceremony. It's important to check with your local courthouse about their specific requirements.

If you're looking for a more intimate setting, consider a city hall with beautiful architecture that will serve as a stunning backdrop for your wedding photos. For example, Chicago City Hall, with its Neoclassical architecture, sloping arches, and domed hallways, or Philadelphia City Hall, a designated national historic landmark.

If you're dreaming of a destination wedding, don't forget to look into the legal recognition of your marriage in your chosen location. Arranging a civil ceremony at home beforehand may be necessary.

Readings, music and vows

Civil weddings are non-religious and legally binding ceremonies, presided over by a government official. They can be held anywhere, from a beach to a courthouse, and are often shorter and more casual than religious wedding ceremonies.

Readings

Civil ceremonies give you the freedom to choose readings that reflect your personality as a couple. You can include funny, romantic, unique, or traditional wedding readings—the only rule is that they must not include religious references.

• Extract from Captain Corelli’s Mandolin by Louis de Bernieres
• Oh! The Places You’ll Go! by Dr Seuss
• Extract from Les Misérables by Victor Hugo
• The Art of Marriage by Wilfred A Peterson
• Extract from The Amber Spyglass by Philip Pullman
• Extract from The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams

Music

When it comes to music, the world is your oyster. You can choose between having classical music, pop songs, or even a live musician. The music you pick can be joyful or reflective—whatever suits your style.

Pre-service/seating of your guests:

• Spring by Vivaldi
• Lucky by Jason Mraz
• Beautiful Day by U2

Arrival of the bride/walking down the aisle/processional:

• The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face by Roberta Flack
• Air (from Water Music) by Handel
• Your Song by Elton John

Signing of the register:

• At Last by Etta James
• All Of Me by John Legend
• Kiss Me by Ed Sheeran

Departure of the bride and groom/recessional:

• Here Comes The Sun by The Beatles
• Prelude on ‘Rhosymedre’ by Ralph Vaughan Williams
• Better Together by Jack Johnson

Vows

Civil wedding vows can be traditional, personalised, funny, or romantic. There are no hard and fast rules, but they should include a statement that communicates each partner is entering into matrimony with the other, and some basic promises of love and care.

• "I, [name], take you, [name], for my lawful wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. I will love and honor you all the days of my life."
• "I love you, and I promise to be your best friend, to respect and support you, to be patient with you, to work together with you to achieve our goals, to accept you unconditionally and to share my life with you forever."

And some examples of personalised vows:

• "You make me laugh, you make me think, and above all, you make me happy."
• "I promise to be your honest, loving, and faithful husband/wife for the rest of my days."

Frequently asked questions