Wed Nor Dread Your Fate": Unraveling The Mystery Of This Shakespearean Advic

You may wed, nor dread your fate is part of an Irish poem about the luckiest months of the year to get married. The full verse goes: When February birds do mate, you may wed, nor dread your fate. In other words, it suggests that couples can marry in February without worrying about bad luck. The phrase nor dread your fate implies that the couple need not fear what the future holds for them. This idea is similar to the Latin phrase amor fati, which means love of fate and describes an attitude where one accepts everything that happens in life as good or necessary.

Amor fati, a Latin phrase, means 'love of fate'

Amor fati, a Latin phrase, means "love of fate" or "love of one's fate". It is often associated with the idea of eternal recurrence, put forward by the German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, which suggests that over an infinite period, everything recurs infinitely. This concept of amor fati is central to Nietzsche's philosophy, and he writes about it in several of his works, including "Why I Am So Clever" (Ecce Homo) and The Gay Science. Nietzsche's amor fati is about embracing all of life, the good and the bad, and seeing it as necessary. He argues that we should not merely bear what is necessary but love it, and that happiness is found in the unconditional acceptance of reality.

Nietzsche's idea of amor fati is similar to the Stoic mindset, which also emphasises acceptance and making the best of any situation. The Stoics believed that we should not seek to change what happens to us but instead accept it and be happy. This attitude is reflected in the words of the Stoic Emperor Marcus Aurelius, who wrote, "A blazing fire makes flame and brightness out of everything that is thrown into it." Another Stoic, Epictetus, who faced many adversities, said, "Do not seek for things to happen the way you want them to; rather, wish that what happens happen the way it happens: then you will be happy."

Amor fati is about recognising that everything that happens in our lives, including suffering and loss, is necessary and can be viewed as good. It is about cultivating an attitude of resilience and strength, where we see obstacles and adversity as fuel for our potential. This idea is reflected in an Irish wedding superstition: "When February birds do mate, you may wed, nor dread your fate." The phrase "nor dread your fate" captures the spirit of amor fati, encouraging one to embrace whatever comes their way in life, be it joy or sorrow, and to view it as necessary and even positive.

February is a lucky month to get married

"You wed nor dread your fate" is a line from an old Celtic poem about the luckiest months to get married. The poem suggests that February is a lucky month for a wedding, as it reads:

> "Marry when the year is new,

> Always loving, kind and true.

> When February birds do mate,

> You may wed, nor dread your fate."

February is not the only lucky month according to the poem, which also suggests June, August, September, November, and December as favourable months. However, it is one of the months that is most favoured by Fortune, according to the poem.

The idea that February is a lucky month for weddings is further supported by the fact that, in olden times, the one chance a woman had to propose to her partner was on February 29th, as it was felt that the usual rules did not apply on this day. This meant that the woman would have to wait four years if she wanted to propose on this date, as it only comes around once every four years!

February is also considered a lucky month for weddings in Asian cultures, as the word for "eight" sounds like the word for "wealth" and "fortune". This makes the eighth day of the eighth month, August 8th, an incredibly lucky date for a wedding.

So, if you're looking for a lucky month to get married, February is definitely a strong contender, according to various cultural traditions and beliefs.

Superstitions and customs for Irish weddings

Irish weddings are steeped in superstition and customs, many of which are aimed at bringing good luck to the couple and keeping bad luck at bay. Here are some of the most common superstitions and customs you're likely to see at an Irish wedding:

Proposal and Wedding Rings

The customary "Will you marry me?" is not the traditional way for an Irish man to propose. Instead, he might ask, "Would you like to be buried with my people?" or "Would you like to hang your washing next to mine?". In olden times, the only chance a woman had to propose was on February 29th, as it was believed that the rules were suspended on this day.

If the proposal is accepted, the woman might wear a Claddagh ring, an ancient Irish symbol consisting of a heart for love, a pair of hands for friendship, and a crown for loyalty. The Claddagh is worn with the crown pointing inwards as an engagement ring and turned outwards after the wedding.

Wedding Date and Colours

When it comes to picking a wedding date, the Irish have plenty of superstitions. A rhyme guides the choice of month:

> Marry when the year is new, Always loving, kind and true.

> When February birds do mate, You may wed, nor dread your fate.

> If you wed when March winds blow, Joy and sorrow both you’ll know...

Another rhyme advises on the choice of colour:

> Marry in white everything’s right

> Marry in blue, lover be true

> Marry in pink, spirit’s will sink

> Marry in grey, live far away...

Wedding Day

On the morning of the wedding, the bride might place a statue of the Infant of Prague outside the church to ward off rain. Other good omens include hearing a cuckoo or seeing three magpies.

The bride will also take care to avoid any bad luck by not trying on her whole outfit before the wedding day. She will also take precautions to increase her good fortune, such as including "something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue" in her attire. In Ireland, this might also include "a sixpence in your shoe".

Wedding Ceremony

The bride will usually be walked down the aisle by a happily married woman, who will also place the veil on her head, for good luck. The veil is also said to ward off evil spirits and fairies, who are believed to be drawn to brides.

The groom should pay for everything on the wedding day using an odd sum of money, or else bad luck will ensue.

Wedding Reception

At the reception, the newlyweds might follow the ancient custom of eating salt and oatmeal to ward off the evil eye. They will also drink mead, a honey wine believed to promote virility and fertility and keep evil spirits away.

Wedding Cake

The traditional Irish wedding cake is a rich whiskey-soaked fruitcake frosted with almond paste icing. It is customary to save the top layer of the cake to serve at the christening of the first baby.

The meaning of 'dread'

The phrase "You may wed, nor dread your fate" refers to Irish wedding superstitions. The full poem goes:

> "Marry when the year is new, Always loving, kind and true. When February birds do mate, You may wed, nor dread your fate. If you wed when March winds blow, Joy and sorrow both you’ll know. Marry in April when you can, Joy for maiden and for man. Marry in the month of May, You will surely rue the day. Marry when June roses blow, Over land and sea you’ll go. They who in July do wed, Must labour always for their bread. Whoever wed in August be, Many a change are sure to see. Marry in September’s shine, Your living will be rich and fine. If in October you do marry, Love will come but riches tarry. If you wed in bleak November, Only joy will come, remember. When December’s showers fall fast, Marry and true love will last."

The meaning of "dread" in this context is "to fear intensely". The word "dread" is a verb meaning "to be in terror of" or to anticipate with alarm, distaste, or reluctance. It can also be a noun, meaning profound fear or terror.

In general, "dread" can be used as a verb, noun, or adjective. As a verb, it means to fear greatly, to be very reluctant to do something, or to hold in respectful awe. As a noun, it refers to great fear, terror, or apprehension. As an adjective, it describes something that is causing fear, terror, or awe.

The word "dread" has its origins in the Middle English "dreden", which comes from the Old English "adrǣdan", meaning "to advise against" or "to fear".

The origin of the phrase 'you wed nor dread your fate'

The phrase "you may wed, nor dread your fate" originates from a common poem detailing the months of the year and days of the week that are considered lucky or unlucky for a wedding. The poem is part of Irish wedding superstitions and is used to guide the choice of wedding dates. Here is the full poem:

> Marry when the year is new,

> Always loving, kind and true.

>

> When February birds do mate,

> You may wed, nor dread your fate.

>

> If you wed when March winds blow,

> Joy and sorrow both you’ll know.

>

> Marry in April when you can,

> Joy for maiden and for man.

>

> Marry in the month of May,

> You will surely rue the day.

>

> Marry when June roses blow,

> Over land and sea you’ll go.

>

> They who in July do wed,

> Must labour always for their bread.

>

> Whoever wed in August be,

> Many a change are sure to see.

>

> Marry in September’s shine,

> Your living will be rich and fine.

>

> If in October you do marry,

> Love will come but riches tarry.

>

> If you wed in bleak November,

> Only joy will come, remember.

>

> When December’s showers fall fast,

> Marry and true love will last.

According to Irish wedding superstitions, the most auspicious month to get married is September, as it promises a rich and fine life for the couple. On the other hand, May is considered the unluckiest month, as the couple will "rue the day."

In addition to the poem about lucky and unlucky months, there is also a proverb about the lucky and unlucky days of the week to get married:

> Monday for health,

> Tuesday for wealth,

> Wednesday the best day of all,

> Thursday for losses,

> Friday for crosses,

> Saturday is no day at all.

Despite the existence of these superstitions, it is important to note that they are just myths or old wives' tales dating back 100 years or more. In modern times, the most popular days for weddings, such as Saturday, are considered among the least auspicious according to these beliefs.

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