
Wedding speeches are a nerve-wracking but essential part of any wedding reception. They can be given by the couple, the best man, maid of honour, parents of the couple, or other close loved ones. The key to a good wedding speech is a combination of humour, sincerity, and sentiment. It should be heartfelt, original, and engaging, with specific anecdotes and stories. A good rule of thumb is to keep the entire speech portion of the reception to 20 minutes, with individual speeches lasting between 2-5 minutes. The introduction is critical to setting the tone for the rest of the speech, with the goal of capturing the audience's attention and interest.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Who speaks | Father of the bride, best man, maid of honour, mother of the bride, couple, officiant, friends and relatives who aren't in the wedding party |
| When to speak | During the meal at the reception, about 3/4 of the way through when guests are finishing up their food |
| Length | Between 2-5 minutes |
| Content | Humour, sincerity, sentiment, anecdotes, stories, and a toast to the couple |
| Order | Traditional or modern |
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What You'll Learn

Wedding speech order
Wedding speeches are an opportunity to inject emotion, joy, and personality into your event, giving your guests a chance to get to know you and your partner, and the people closest to you, a little better.
There is a traditional order of wedding speeches, but it is not mandatory and can be adjusted to better reflect your family or your priorities. The traditional order is as follows: first, the father (or mother, or both) of the bride gives a speech. This is usually followed by the father (or mother, or both) of the groom. Next, the couple may give a brief speech, thanking everyone for gathering to celebrate. Then, the best man gives a speech, followed by the maid of honour.
However, some couples opt to flip the order of the best man and maid of honour, or to have the couple speak at the very end. The best man and maid of honour's speeches usually come at the end of the speech portion of the evening, to help kick off the party vibes.
There are also other people who may give a speech. For example, the mother of the bride may give a speech along with, or in place of, the father of the bride. The groom's family may also give a speech. If there are other important people in your life who would like to say a few words, such as wedding party members, grandparents, or close friends, they can give a speech at the rehearsal dinner, which is usually more casual and intimate.
The timing of the speeches is also important. Speeches usually take place during the meal at the wedding reception. The sweet spot is starting the speeches about three-quarters of the way through dinner, as guests are finishing up their meal and still seated. That way, once the speeches are wrapped up, guests will be done eating, tables will start being cleared, and everyone will be ready to hit the dance floor.
Another option is to hold off on speeches until dinner is just about finished, so that guests can digest their food before getting back up for a full night of dancing. Timing a few speeches at the start of the meal is also an option, but this may be more disruptive to the dinner.
When it comes to the content of your speech, it's important to be sincere, heartfelt, and specific. This is a wedding, so there's no shame in being sappy. It's also a good idea to include some humour, and to be gracious and thank the hosts, the staff, and everyone who helped put the wedding together.
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How to start a wedding speech
Wedding speeches are a delicate balance of humour, sincerity, and sentiment. The key to a successful wedding speech is to be heartfelt and original. It is important to plan ahead and know your speech well, but also to play to your strengths. If you are a funny person, pepper your speech with jokes. If you are nervous, remember that this is likely the easiest crowd you will ever speak in front of—they want to laugh and cry, so don't be afraid to lean into the sentimentality of the occasion.
First things first, don't forget to introduce yourself at the top of your speech. Tell the crowd who you are and your relation to the wedding party. Be gracious and thank the hosts, the staff, and everyone who helped put the wedding together. It is also a nice touch to welcome everyone and thank the guests for coming.
If you are the best man or maid of honour, you might want to start with a joke to get the room on your side. For example, you could say something like: "Well, I've had the chance to wear a beautiful dress, carry a gorgeous bouquet and walk down the aisle without any of the financial pressure or stress of planning a wedding, so thank you!" Or, if you are the bride, you could open with a light-hearted line like: "I've dreamed of this day my entire life—though in my original plan, it starred George Clooney. But [Groom’s name], you’re a solid runner-up!"
If you are feeling nervous, it can be helpful to have a drink to calm your nerves. Just make sure you know your body well enough to judge how much you can handle—you don't want to end up drunk and risk seeming sloppy and disrespectful.
Finally, remember to time your speech. It should be between 2-5 minutes long. There is nothing wrong with something short and sweet, especially if you dread public speaking. Take your time, make eye contact, and let your words land.
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How to write a wedding speech
Writing a wedding speech can be daunting, but it's a chance to celebrate two people in love and share some heartfelt, sincere, and sentimental thoughts with a receptive audience. Here are some tips on how to write a memorable wedding speech:
Know Your Role and the Order of Speakers
Firstly, it's important to know your role in the wedding and the order of speakers. Traditionally, the father of the bride speaks first, followed by the best man, the maid of honour, and then the mother of the bride. However, modern weddings may have a different order, and other roles like siblings of the couple, grandparents, or close friends may also give speeches.
Prepare in Advance
Don't wing it! Prepare your speech in advance and practice. Know your speech well enough that you don't need to read directly from notes, but feel free to bring notes to guide you if needed.
Timing is Key
Keep your speech concise and engaging. Aim for 2-5 minutes. This is enough time to share your thoughts without losing the audience's attention.
Introduce Yourself and Be Gracious
Remember to introduce yourself at the beginning of your speech and explain your relation to the couple. Be sure to thank the hosts, the staff, and everyone who helped make the wedding possible.
Share Anecdotes and Stories
Instead of vague compliments, share specific anecdotes and stories that paint a picture of the couple and their relationship. Talk about how they met, a funny first impression, or a childhood memory involving the bride or groom. This adds a personal touch and makes your speech more engaging and heartfelt.
Punctuate with Humour
Don't be afraid to add some humour to your speech! The audience wants to laugh and is already on your side. However, know your audience and avoid inappropriate jokes or stories.
Finish with a Toast
Conclude your speech by raising a toast to the happy couple. This is a traditional way to wish them well and wrap up your thoughts.
Remember, the most important thing is to speak from the heart and celebrate the love between the newlyweds. With a bit of preparation and these tips, you'll deliver a wedding speech that the couple and guests will remember fondly.
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Who gives a speech at a wedding reception
Wedding speeches are a time-honoured tradition, with a typical structure that includes the best man, the maid of honour, and the fathers of the bride and groom. However, modern weddings are seeing a shift towards more personalised approaches, with couples choosing to include other members of the wedding party, grandparents, or close friends.
The Best Man
The best man's speech typically comes first. They will introduce themselves and their relationship to the groom, share anecdotes, and offer congratulations and best wishes to the couple.
The Maid of Honour
The maid of honour's speech follows a similar structure but focuses on the bride and her journey. It is becoming increasingly popular for the maid of honour to give a speech, and in some cases, the bride herself may also speak.
The Couple
The couple may give a joint or individual speech, expressing their thanks to the guests and their excitement about married life. This is a nice way to kickstart the reception meal.
Parents of the Couple
Traditionally, the father of the bride speaks first, as the bride's parents are usually the hosts. However, modern weddings often see both sets of parents contributing financially, so it is a nice gesture to invite both to speak. They may offer a welcome speech, thank the guests, and raise a glass to the couple.
Other Speakers
Additional speakers can be included, especially at the rehearsal dinner, which is more intimate and casual. This could include other wedding party members, grandparents, or close friends.
Tips for Speakers
Speeches should be heartfelt, sincere, and engaging, with a mix of humour and sentiment. Speakers should aim for 2-5 minutes, be mindful of the tone, and take their time, making eye contact with the couple and the crowd.
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How to time your wedding speech
The timing of your wedding speech will depend on your role in the wedding and the preferences of the couple. Traditionally, the best man kicks off the wedding speeches with a toast shortly after everyone is seated at their reception tables. The maid of honour then takes the mic, followed by the father of the bride and/or mother of the bride, who will congratulate the newlyweds and give a toast. The couple may then wish to say a few brief words to kickstart the reception meal and thank the guests for coming.
If you are nervous about public speaking, it is recommended to keep your speech short and sweet, lasting between 2-5 minutes. Take your time and make sure your words land. It is also important to be familiar with your speech so that you are not reading directly from your notes or phone.
The sweet spot for starting the speeches is about three-quarters of the way through dinner as guests are finishing up their meals and still seated. That way, once the speeches are over, guests will be done eating, tables will be cleared, and everyone will be ready to hit the dance floor.
If you are giving a speech, don't forget to introduce yourself at the beginning and thank the hosts, staff, and everyone who helped put the wedding together. It is also a good idea to plan ahead with the wedding planner or MC so you know when you will be speaking.
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Frequently asked questions
Here are some tips for giving a wedding speech:
- Plan your speech ahead of time.
- Include a combination of humour, sincerity and sentiment.
- Be specific and share anecdotes and stories.
- Keep it short and sweet, between 2-5 minutes.
- Don't read your speech off a piece of paper; use notes instead.
- Be mindful of your audience and keep the content appropriate.
Traditionally, the maid of honour, best man, and parents of the bride give a speech at the wedding reception. The couple may also choose additional wedding party members to give toasts.
You can include a combination of funny one-liners, heartfelt moments, and stories about the couple. You can also share your well-wishes for the couple. For example: "Alex and Jamie, as you embark on this wild journey called marriage, remember these words of wisdom: always say 'I love you', never go to bed angry, and most importantly, agree on which way the toilet paper roll should go."
Your speech should be between 2-5 minutes. This is the sweet spot to keep your audience engaged.
It's natural to feel emotional during your speech. Take a pause and a breath if you feel yourself getting choked up. You can also raise your glass and say, "To love, laughter, and happily ever after!".











































