Deborah Chan
Wedding invitations are a chance to give your guests a glimpse of the celebration to come. The wording and style of the invitation can be formal and traditional or relaxed and contemporary, depending on the couple's preference. The invitation should include essential details such as the couple's full names, the hosts, the ceremony location and time, the reception venue, and how to RSVP. Other details such as the dress code, transport and accommodation information, and gift wishes can be included on separate cards or the wedding website. The invitation should provide guests with enough information to arrive prepared and set the tone for the big day.
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Host Line
The host line is the opening line on a wedding invitation and traditionally names the hosts of the event. If multiple parties are hosting, you only need to include names if you're going for a formal feel. If you're hosting the wedding yourselves, this line can be omitted.
Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts of the wedding and are named at the top of the invitation. However, nowadays, this isn't always the case, and some couples opt to include the names of both sets of parents, regardless of who is paying for the wedding. It is also becoming more common for couples to host their own weddings, or to do so together with their parents. If you want to include the name of a parent who has passed away, you'll need to rearrange things as someone who has passed away can't technically serve as a host. Here are some examples of how to do this:
> Lauren Martinez, daughter of Marta Martinez
> Lauren Martinez, daughter of Robert Martinez and the late Marta Martinez
> Julia French, daughter of Mr. Adam French and the late Iris French
If your parents are divorced and you want to include both of them as hosts, write each name on a separate line. If you're including the name of a stepparent, write it on the same line as their partner. Here is an example of how a bride with divorced (and remarried) parents worded her wedding invitation:
> Dr. Vance and Elizabeth Gregory
> Mr. James Abner and Lydia Abner
> Mr. Harold and Jane Hyland
> invite you to the wedding of their children Amy Abner and Charles Hyland
If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, you can skip the host line altogether or start the invitation wording with a warm and welcoming introduction, such as:
> Together with their families
> Together with their parents
> Emma and Jax request the pleasure of your company...
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Couple's Names
When it comes to addressing wedding invitations, there are a few different factors to consider, such as the couple's gender, their marital status, and their titles. Here are some guidelines for addressing the invitations to the couple's names:
Heterosexual Couples
For heterosexual couples, the traditional way to address the invitation is to use "Mr." and "Mrs." followed by the husband's full name. The bride's name typically comes first, followed by the groom. However, modern alternatives include listing the woman's name first or using both names with their respective titles. If the couple has different last names, it is preferable to list the person you are closest with first, or alphabetically. Here are some examples:
- "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren" (Outer envelope)
- "Mr. and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle" (Inner envelope)
- "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren" (Outer envelope)
- "Mr. Warren and Mrs. Warren" or "Thomas and Michelle" (Inner envelope)
- "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez" (Outer envelope)
- "Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez" or "Maria and David" (Inner envelope)
Same-Sex Couples
For same-sex couples, the traditional rule of placing the woman's name first does not apply. Instead, you can choose the order based on alphabetical order or personal preference. Both names can be included with their respective titles, or only the first and last names can be used. Here are some examples:
- "Captains Josephine and Jonathan Wood, US Navy" (Outer envelope)
- "The Captains Wood" (Inner envelope)
- "Stacey Bullington and Peter Cunningham"
The level of formality of the wedding invitation depends on the couple's preferences and the wedding's theme. For a more formal invitation, use titles ("Mr.", "Mrs.", "Ms.", etc.) and write out full names, including middle names. Numerals and shorthand are typically avoided in formal invitations. For a casual wedding, first and last names can be used without titles, and numerals are acceptable. Here is an example of a more casual invitation:
"Thomas and Michelle Warren"
In conclusion, when addressing wedding invitations to couples, consider their gender, marital status, and preferred titles. The level of formality can vary, but it is essential to ensure that each person's name is spelled correctly and that the invitation follows the couple's preferences.
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Date, Time, and Location
The date, time, and location are essential components of a wedding invitation. Here are some tips and guidelines to consider when including this information:
Date
When indicating the date, it is advisable to spell out the numbers and write them in full. For example, instead of using numerals like "5", write it as "five". It is also recommended to use phrases like "half after five o'clock" instead of "five thirty". The year is optional, as it is generally assumed that the wedding will take place on the nearest date with that number. For a formal wedding, stick to full written-out formats, while numerals are acceptable for a more casual event.
Time
Including the time on the invitation is crucial. It is recommended to state the actual ceremony start time to ensure your guests are present for the important part of the day. It is best to avoid using phrases like "please arrive by" as this may encourage lateness. If you wish to guide your guests on arrival time, you can add this information next to the ceremony time, for example, "arrival 12:30 pm | ceremony 1:00 pm". If you are hosting welcome drinks or an open house before the ceremony, include this in the invitation, providing clarity on the plan and timings.
Location
The location section of the invitation should include the venue's name and address, city, and state. Writing out the full address ensures clarity and helps guests plan their transportation accordingly. If the ceremony and reception are held at the same location, you may simply write "reception to follow" or "dinner and dancing to follow". However, if the reception is at a different venue or starts several hours after the ceremony, include a separate reception start time and address to reduce confusion.
Remember, these guidelines are not set in stone, and you can adapt them to fit your wedding's style and tone.
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Dress Code
Including a dress code on a wedding invitation is a helpful way to give your guests clarity about what attire is expected. It is also a great way to ensure your wedding aesthetic is complemented by your guests' outfits. However, it is important to prioritise your guests' comfort and avoid overly restrictive dress codes that might make guests feel uncomfortable or excluded.
When deciding what to include on your wedding invitation, you can be as creative or as traditional as you like with your wording. You could use traditional wording like "Black Tie" or "Cocktail Attire", or you could use phrases like "Dress to Impress" or "Beach Chic". You could also base your dress code on a colour palette, such as black, shades of blue, etc.
If you want to be very specific about your dress code, you could include a separate insert or additional card with your invitation that provides more detail. Alternatively, you could include the dress code on your wedding website and provide a link to it on your invitation.
White-Tie Attire
"We request the honour of your presence at our elegant white-tie affair on [wedding date]. Dress code: Please wear tailcoats or ball gowns."
Semi-Formal Attire
"Join us for a jovial night celebrating [couple's names] on [wedding date]. We ask that you wear dressy separates or a suit and tie for the affair."
Dressy Casual Attire
"We are excited to invite you to our wedding on [wedding date]! Please arrive in dressy casual attire, which is anything that is stylish yet comfortable."
Beach Casual
"Meet us by the ocean for a fun celebration wearing beach casual clothing."
Country and Western Attire
"We are elated to be throwing a laid-back celebration! The wedding dress code is country and Western attire, which includes cowboy/girl boots and hats, casual suits and flowy dresses."
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RSVP Details
When it comes to RSVPs, there are a few options. You can include a separate response card for guests to fill out and return by mail. You could also have guests RSVP via your wedding website, in which case you should include the website address on a separate card.
If you're doing RSVPs through your website, it's still important to include the RSVP details on the invitation. You need to assume that some people won't visit the website, so anything you'd be upset about guests not knowing should be on the invitation. This includes the date by which guests need to RSVP.
You can also give guests the details on how to confirm their attendance in another way. For example, you could include your phone number or social media handles, so guests can message or call you to RSVP.
If you're providing transport for your guests, you can include a tick box on the invite for them to indicate whether they'll be using it. You can also let them know about the parking situation at the venue, including the rules about parking if guests are staying overnight.
If you have any additional events, like a welcome party or farewell brunch, you can include an insert in the envelope or ask guests to RSVP to these events when they RSVP for the wedding.
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Frequently asked questions
You should include the who, what, where, and when of your wedding. This includes the couple's full names, who's hosting the nuptials, the ceremony location, the reception venue, and the date and time. If the ceremony and reception are at the same venue, you can simply write "reception to follow." If not, include the full address and other pertinent information on a separate details card.
You can also include the dress code, transport information, and parking details. If you're including a gift registry or asking for money, this information can be included on a separate insert card.
If you're sending formal invitations with both an outer mailing envelope and an inner envelope, list only the names of the invited adult guests on both envelopes. If you’re sending outer envelopes only, list only the names of the invited adult guests. Do not put "adults only" on the wedding invitation. Instead, encourage family members and wedding party members to spread the word to other guests.
Traditionally, the bride's parents are the hosts of the wedding and are named at the top of the invitation. However, some couples opt to include the names of both sets of parents, regardless of who is paying. If the couple is hosting, you can write: " [Couple's names] request the pleasure of your company at the celebration of their marriage."
