Gifts For The Bride: Bridesmaids' Guide To Giving

what do bridesmaids give the bride

Bridesmaids are an integral part of the wedding ceremony, supporting the bride and helping with planning and execution. While their duties are limited, they are expected to attend the wedding and assist the bride on the day. In modern times, bridesmaids often participate in planning wedding-related events such as bridal showers and bachelorette parties.

The role of a bridesmaid can be demanding and expensive, with costs for attire, travel, and gifts adding up quickly. It has become customary for brides to present their bridesmaids with gifts as a token of appreciation for their support and financial commitment. These gifts can be personalised, such as monogrammed tote bags or birthstone jewellery, or chosen based on each bridesmaid's hobbies and personality.

Bridesmaids are also expected to provide emotional support to the bride, who may value their opinions on various aspects of the wedding, from attire to flowers. Effective communication is key, and bridesmaids should be honest about their capabilities and comfortable expressing their boundaries. While the maid of honour typically takes the lead, bridesmaids are expected to support her efforts and work collaboratively with the rest of the bridal party.

In summary, the role of a bridesmaid extends beyond the wedding day, encompassing pre- and post-wedding responsibilities. Their presence and contributions are integral to ensuring the bride's journey to the altar is as smooth and memorable as possible.

Characteristics Values
Give a wedding gift Yes
Give a gift at the bridal shower Yes
Give a gift at the bachelorette party Yes
Give a gift at the engagement party Yes
Give a gift at the farewell party Yes
Give a gift at the rehearsal dinner No

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Gifts for the bridal shower

As a bridesmaid, you'll be expected to help plan and pay for the bridal shower. If you can afford it, it's customary to give an item from the registry or gift something, such as a spa day or facial, for the bridal shower. If other bridesmaids want to chip in, it’s also a great idea to pool your resources on a larger gift for the couple.

  • Birth Date Pendant Necklace: These special necklaces are inspired by astrology and numerology, with four thoughtfully chosen stones bringing the wearer good luck and energy. You can have their initials engraved on the back for a small additional cost.
  • Birthstone Tea: Each blend of herbs, spices, and flowers in this set offers wellness benefits, and the tea leaves steep to the hue of the recipient's birthstone. It also comes with a tea strainer.
  • Virtual Experience: Uncommon Goods offers online classes led by experts in a host of areas, so there's bound to be a fun hobby for everyone in your squad. All the supplies are shipped in advance, so they'll just need to hop onto Zoom.
  • Personalized Yoga Mat: This yoga mat has an anti-slip back and comes with a strap for easy transport. The best part is that it's customized with their name and favorite color.
  • Wellness Journal: Help them prioritize self-care with a wellness journal. This pick from Papier has 12 weeks' worth of space to track goals, jot down feelings, express gratitude, and more. You can also customize the covers with each person's name.
  • Eye Cream: Charlotte Tilbury's Magic Cream is designed to smooth, firm, plump, and prime the skin. The option to engrave the jar with each bridesmaid's name makes it an especially thoughtful gift.
  • Custom Mini Canvas: Choose a favorite food, animal, quote, or location to be hand-painted by this Etsy seller. You could have a spot meaningful to your wedding—perhaps where you went for your bachelorette party or your venue—painted as a keepsake gift.
  • Custom-Embroidered Sweatshirt: These crewneck sweatshirts are custom-embroidered along the neckline and sleeve with your crew's wedding title and name. Choose from 11 fabric colors and 35 thread colors to give each member special swag.
  • Embroidered Fleece Shorts: If you're planning a summer wedding, these sweat-shorts are a trendy gift your bridesmaids will love. They can even be embroidered with each person's name or role.
  • Birth Flower Necklace: This pendant from Made By Mary is stamped with the wearer's birth flower. You can gift each of your bridesmaids a personalized bauble that will also stack well with their other daily accessories.
  • "Team Bride" Crew Socks: Socks are a great, practical gift. These Insta-worthy socks will serve as a permanent reminder of this crazy but wonderful time in your lives.
  • Personalized Iced Coffee Cup: A bridesmaid gift for the wedding day that will go far is coffee. Set up a breakfast bar with pastries, cold brew, creamers, sugar, and these cute glass cups in the getting-ready suite. Each can be personalized with a BFF's name and a floral pattern.
  • Mini Alphabet Box: While wedding day flower bouquets will only stay vibrant for a few days, these roses will last up to a year. No care is necessary! You can choose any arrangement, but we love these mini alphabet boxes for a personalized touch.
  • Custom Illustrated Card: Custom illustrations make great, sentimental, and cute bridesmaid gifts. This physical card can feature you with each of your bridesmaids. With dozens of hairstyles, dress designs, and skin tones to choose from, it will be easy to create a cartoon of each of your loved ones.
  • Long-Lasting Nail Polish: Barbiecore is here to stay, and these bottles of pink nail polish will embrace the moment. It's a fun gift for your bridesmaids and can even be the shade they wear on the wedding day.
  • Personalized Oversized Blanket: A cozy throw blanket is a welcome gift, and your bridesmaids will instantly feel appreciated when they unwrap one of these waffle throws embroidered with their name. They'll put it to use right away for a well-deserved post-wedding nap.
  • Spafinder Gift Card: Give your squad the gift of a spa day with this inclusive gift card. Spafinder digital gift cards are good at thousands of spas and salons across the US, so they can seek out an oasis no matter where they travel from for the big day.
  • Personalized Jewelry Case: This gift is made of pebbled vegan leather with a soft linen lining that will keep their accessories untangled and scratch-free. For a small additional cost, you can have the lid foil debossed with their name.
  • Pavé Crystal Hoops: These pavé crystal hoops from Kendra Scott will add extra glam to their wedding outfits, though they're simple enough for everyday wear. They come in gold- or rhodium-plated brass.
  • Versatile Beauty Balm: Jones Road's Miracle Balm is a versatile product that delivers a dewy glow in seconds and can be applied to both cheeks and lips. It comes in eight different shades to suit a variety of skin tones, so everyone in your crew can enjoy the subtle glow.
  • Eye Masks: These eye gels from grace & stella are super affordable and have serious de-puffing power. Your bridesmaids will love starting the wedding day with the eye energy boost—and the morning after the wedding, too.
  • Pajamas: If your bridesmaids won't actually use their getting-ready robes beyond the big day, consider gifting each cozy pajamas they'll want to wear nightly instead. This particular short set is made from a temperature-regulating knit fabric to keep them cool as they sleep. It comes in 10+ different gorgeous hues, and you can even have the pocket monogrammed for a small charge.
  • Personalized Stanley Cup: Hydration is very important, so these laser-engraved Stanley Quencher Tumblers are perfect for your bridal squad. Fill each tumbler with the respective 'maid's beverage of choice, so it's ready to go when they arrive on the morning of the wedding.
  • Monogrammed Tote Bag: A tote is a practical gift for your bridesmaids, and it can also make your life easier. No gift wrapping is necessary when you can put any extra goodies right in the canvas bag. This one comes in two different sizes, five different colors, and three times as many thread and design options for the monogram.

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Gifts for the wedding

Being a bridesmaid can be a complicated and expensive role, so it's always a nice gesture when the bride decides to give her bridesmaids a gift as a token of her appreciation. Here are some gift ideas that are sure to make your bridesmaids feel special:

  • Personalised items: Custom embroidered pyjamas, monogrammed tote bags, or birthstone jewellery are all great options. You can also gift each member of the bridal party a different gift based on their likes and personality.
  • Practical items: A personalised yoga mat, an anti-slip water bottle, or a wellness journal are all thoughtful gifts that your bridesmaids can use long after the wedding.
  • Unique items: Birth date pendant necklaces, custom-painted mini canvases, or a set of colourful tea that steeps to the hue of the recipient's birthstone are all unique gifts that your bridesmaids will treasure.
  • Fun items: Smiley face slippers, disco ball tumblers, or custom-illustrated cards are all fun options that will bring a smile to your bridesmaids' faces.
  • Relaxing items: After all the wedding planning and festivities, your bridesmaids will appreciate some relaxation. Gift them a spa day, a wellness journal, or a set of eye masks to help them unwind.
  • Sentimental items: A sentimental photo book filled with your favourite memories or a custom-embroidered sweatshirt with the bridal party's name and wedding date are sure to tug at your bridesmaids' heartstrings.

Remember, it's not just about the gift itself, but also the thought behind it. Choose gifts that show your bridesmaids how much you value their time, support, and friendship during this important milestone in your life.

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Paying for the bachelorette party

Local Bachelorette Parties:

If the bachelorette party is held locally and involves a night out on the town, the bridesmaids and invited guests typically pay for their share of the bill, as well as the bride's expenses. This includes items such as dinner, drinks, transportation, and any other activities. It is considered a nice gesture for the bridal party to treat the bride to drinks, dinner, or other activities as a way to celebrate and honour her.

Destination Bachelorette Parties:

For bachelorette parties that involve travelling to another destination, the costs can become more significant. In these cases, the host and guests usually pay for their own expenses, including transportation, accommodation, meals, and activities. The bride is generally expected to cover her own travel costs and share of the lodging. However, it is considerate for the bride to contribute to some of the extra costs, especially if she has chosen a location that requires significant travel for her guests.

Maid of Honor's Role:

The maid of honor typically takes the lead in planning and organising the bachelorette party. This includes managing the budget and finances. It is essential to have open and honest conversations about the budget with all invited guests to ensure everyone is comfortable with the expected costs. The maid of honor may need to front some of the costs initially and then be reimbursed by the other attendees.

Budgeting and Tracking Expenses:

To effectively manage the finances, it is important to establish a realistic budget that takes into account everyone's financial situation. This can be done by anonymously polling the guests to determine their comfort levels with spending. Once a budget is set, the maid of honor or designated planner can start booking accommodations and activities within that price range. It is helpful to share pricing information with the group so that everyone can budget accordingly. As expenses are incurred, it is crucial to keep track of all receipts and create a spreadsheet to input every bill. This ensures that everyone can be charged accurately at the end of the event.

Saving Money:

Bachelorette parties can be expensive, so here are some tips to save money:

  • Opt for more affordable accommodations, such as an Airbnb, or reach out to the rental company directly to bypass fees.
  • Include budget-friendly activities, like a local hike or picnic, or make expensive activities optional.
  • Consider unique alternatives to a weekend getaway, such as an at-home movie night, a cooking class, or a pottery-making session.
  • Discuss and decide as a group what expenses the bride will be expected to cover and be transparent about the budget from the beginning of the planning process.

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Paying for hair and makeup

There is no definitive answer to the question of who pays for the bridesmaids' hair and makeup. It is generally determined by the bride's budget and the financial situation of the bridesmaids. Here are some options to consider:

The Bride Pays for Hair and Makeup

The most traditional arrangement is for the bride to cover all hair and makeup costs for the bridal party. This gives the bride more control over the beauty agenda for the big day and allows for more time with her bridesmaids while getting ready. However, this option can be expensive and difficult to coordinate.

Bridesmaids Pay for Hair and Makeup

Another option is to let bridesmaids pay for their own hair and makeup. This approach gives bridesmaids the freedom to choose their preferred stylists and can be more cost-effective for the bride, especially if she has a large bridal party. However, it requires the bride to be flexible about the outcome, as not all bridesmaids may opt for professional services.

Split the Cost

The bride and bridesmaids can also split the cost of hair and makeup. For example, the bride could pay for hair, while the bridesmaids pay for makeup, or vice versa. This option can ease the financial burden on both parties and allow for some flexibility in styling choices.

No Professional Hair and Makeup

If budget is a concern for both the bride and bridesmaids, another option is to take a DIY approach to hair and makeup, which can significantly reduce costs for everyone. Bridesmaids can do their own hair and makeup or help each other get ready, especially if they have experience in these areas.

Subsidising Costs

The bride can also choose to subsidise the cost of hair and makeup for her bridesmaids. This could involve asking bridesmaids to contribute a set amount, such as $30, and then covering the rest of the tab. This option helps to reduce costs for both the bride and the bridesmaids while still ensuring professional services.

Ultimately, the decision on who pays for bridesmaids' hair and makeup should be made early in the planning process, considering the financial situation of all parties involved. Clear and transparent communication is key to ensuring everyone is on the same page and happy with the arrangement.

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Paying for travel

Travel costs can be one of the biggest expenses for bridesmaids, especially for destination weddings. If the wedding is not in your hometown, you will be expected to cover the cost of your flights and overnight accommodations. It is a good idea to book any travel and accommodations as soon as you have the finalised wedding date, and don't forget to ask about the rehearsal dinner and post-wedding brunch plans so you can be present for those too.

If the wedding is in a destination location, each bridesmaid will typically only chip in for an evening out for the bachelorette party, rather than paying for the duration of the bride's stay.

Occasionally, the couple may pick up the tab for hotel accommodations, but this is not something to be expected.

Frequently asked questions

Yes, it is customary for bridesmaids to give the bride a gift. This could be something small and homemade, or a gift from the registry.

Bridesmaids can give the bride something personalised, like custom embroidered pyjamas, monogrammed tote bags, or birthstone jewellery.

A bridesmaid can give the bride a gift before, after, or on the wedding day.

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