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Music is an essential part of a wedding, from the ceremony to the reception. It sets the tone, stirs up emotions, and shares a message with your guests. The right songs can make your wedding memorable and enjoyable for everyone. However, choosing the wrong songs can lead to awkward moments and even cause guests to leave the dance floor. So, how do you select the perfect music for your wedding? This guide will help you navigate the do's and don'ts of wedding music, from traditional ceremony songs to modern reception hits, to create a magical atmosphere that reflects your unique style and taste.
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What You'll Learn
Instrumental music during rituals like unity candle lighting
Music is a crucial part of a wedding as it sets the tone, evokes emotions, and shares a message with your guests. The lighting of the candles is a powerful mini-ceremony that occurs twice during a wedding service. It is a symbolic ritual where the couple each lights a separate candle to represent themselves as individuals, and then they light a unity candle from these two candles to symbolise their union in marriage.
Instrumental music is a popular choice for this ritual as it is easier to abridge than songs with lyrics, which can lose context if cut short. The melody of the music can be beautifully poignant and hold a special meaning for the couple and their families, without the risk of the lyrics being inappropriate or failing to suit the ceremony. For example, 'Danny Boy' is a popular choice as an instrumental, as it is a meaningful and beautiful melody, but the words would not suit the ceremony.
When choosing music for rituals, it is important to consider the length of the piece. Each part of the candle-lighting ceremony is only about a minute long, so the excerpt of music should be short and sweet. Instrumental music is a good choice as performers can easily improvise and cut the music without losing the context of the piece. For example, 'Canon in D' can be played, with the faster section reserved for the unity candle lighting.
However, some couples may prefer to have a song with lyrics playing during the candle-lighting ceremony. In this case, it is important to choose a song with appropriate lyrics that reflect the theme of light, love, and unity. For example, 'A New Commandment' is a poignant choice for a religious ceremony, with its lyrics: "A new commandment I give unto you, that you love one another as I have loved you."
In conclusion, whether you choose instrumental music or a song with lyrics for your unity candle lighting, it is important to consider the context of the ritual and choose music that reflects the powerful and symbolic nature of the ceremony.
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Songs with explicit lyrics
When it comes to songs with explicit lyrics at weddings, there are a few things to consider. Firstly, it is essential to remember that each wedding is unique, and the couple's preferences should be respected. If they want explicit music, the DJ should play it, and if they don't, it should be avoided.
However, it is worth noting that many popular dance songs contain explicit lyrics, and creating a party atmosphere may be more challenging without them. DJs can use their judgment and experience to decide what is appropriate, and in some cases, playing the clean version of a song may be a good compromise.
One important consideration is the presence of children at the wedding. It is generally recommended to avoid explicit music when families are invited, as it may be offensive to some parents. Similarly, older generations may be more sensitive to explicit lyrics, and it is respectful to consider their comfort. Religious guests may also find explicit or sexually suggestive songs uncomfortable.
To navigate this, DJs can ask the couple about their preferences regarding explicit music and profanity. They can also assess the crowd and use their discretion when choosing songs. Ultimately, the couple's wishes should be prioritized, and if explicit music is important to them, the DJ should be upfront about any discomfort and ensure the couple is aware.
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Songs with inappropriate themes
When it comes to your wedding playlist, determining what music to include can be overwhelming. Weddings celebrate love and happiness, so songs with a less-than-appreciative take on the subject are best avoided.
Music with explicit lyrics is a common dilemma for wedding DJs. Many popular songs have explicit lyrics, and some couples may want to hear them at their wedding. However, weddings tend to include guests from various age groups and backgrounds, so it is likely that at least some guests will be annoyed or offended by explicit music. Many people view weddings as family-friendly events, so DJs should be mindful of this when selecting music. Most hit songs with explicit lyrics also have clean versions available, so DJs can opt to play these instead.
Some songs that are commonly deemed inappropriate for weddings due to their themes or lyrics include:
- "Wrecking Ball" by Miley Cyrus
- "It Must Have Been Love" by Roxette
- "Shut Up and Let Me Go" by The Ting Tings
- "That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain
- "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling" by The Righteous Brothers
- "It's Not Right But It's Okay" by Whitney Houston
- "What's Love Got to Do With It?" by Tina Turner
- "Suspicious Minds" by Elvis Presley
- "Highway to Hell" by AC/DC
- "Killing Me Softly with His Song" by Roberta Flack
Ultimately, the decision to play explicit music or songs with inappropriate themes is up to the couple. If they want explicit music, DJs should play it. If they don't, DJs should respect their wishes and opt for clean versions or different songs.
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Songs with negative vibes
When it comes to your wedding, you'll want to keep the mood upbeat and joyful. So, it's best to avoid songs with negative vibes. Here are some examples of songs that are often deemed inappropriate for weddings due to their negative themes:
"Every Breath You Take" by The Police
Despite being perceived as a love song, the lyrics of this song are from the perspective of a stalker, which is definitely not the vibe you want at a wedding!
"Gold Digger" by Kanye West
This song by a controversial figure in pop conveys a negative view of relationships and marriage, with the song being about a toxic relationship.
"You Give Love a Bad Name" by Bon Jovi
This catchy 80s tune is about rejecting your lover, which is not exactly the message you want to be sending on your wedding day!
"Fake Love" by Drake
While Drake is a popular artist, this particular song is about "fake people showing fake love," which is not the type of love you want to be celebrating on your special day.
"Suspicious Minds" by Elvis
This Elvis ballad is about a mistrusting and dysfunctional relationship, which is not ideal for a wedding celebration.
"Mother-In-Law" by Ernie K Doe
This song is about the singer's mother-in-law, who he lists as one of his spurned lovers. While it may be a catchy tune, it's probably best to avoid playing this one at your wedding, especially if your mother-in-law is present!
"Single Ladies" by Beyoncé
Although this song can be seen as a fun tribute to single ladies, it may be overdone at weddings. Beyoncé has released many other hits that could be more appropriate for your big day.
"Uptown Funk" by Mark Ronson and Bruno Mars
While it's a smash hit, "Uptown Funk" may be overplayed and could be replaced with more modern songs to keep the dance floor lively.
"All About That Bass" by Meghan Trainor
This song may have been a trailblazer when it was released, but it might stir up negative reactions from guests who are tired of hearing it.
"Who Let the Dogs Out" by Baha Men
Ranking as one of the most annoying songs by Rolling Stone, this song has been irritating listeners for years and is best left off your wedding playlist.
"My Humps" by The Black Eyed Peas
This song has been described as having a negative kitsch factor, and it's more likely to clear the dance floor than get people grooving.
"Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga
Despite being a certified banger, the themes of "Bad Romance" revolve around ugliness, disease, drama, and revenge—not exactly the sentiments you want to evoke at a wedding!
In addition to these specific songs, it's generally recommended to avoid playing songs that remind you of past relationships, infidelity, stalking, or breakups. Keep the mood joyful and romantic by choosing songs that align with the happy occasion.
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Choosing a processional song
Choosing the music for your wedding is an important task as it sets the tone for the entire event. The processional song is the music that plays when VIPs, including the officiant, grandparents, parents, wedding party members, and the couple, walk down the aisle. Here are some tips to help you choose the perfect processional song for your wedding:
Consider the bigger picture
While it's easy to get caught up in choosing the perfect song for walking down the aisle, it's important to consider the overall flow of the wedding ceremony. Think about the different segments of the wedding and how the music can enhance each moment. This includes preludes, processionals, and recessionals.
Choose a song that reflects your personality
If you're a fun-loving couple, opt for an upbeat processional song that matches your energetic and playful nature. Alternatively, if you prefer something more traditional, classical music or instrumental pieces can create a romantic and elegant atmosphere for your wedding.
Think outside the box
Instead of choosing overplayed wedding songs, opt for something unique and unexpected. This could be a song that holds a special meaning for you or your partner, or simply a tune that evokes strong emotions. Think about the lyrics and how they reflect your relationship. You can also choose a song that aligns with your wedding theme, such as a fairy tale-inspired song for a Beauty and the Beast-themed wedding.
Opt for instrumental versions
If you're hiring live musicians or prefer an instrumental vibe, consider listening to instrumental versions of your favourite songs. For example, if you've hired a string quartet, find string arrangements of your desired songs. This adds a unique and personalised touch to your wedding.
Keep it age-appropriate
While choosing a processional song for younger members of the wedding party, such as the flower girl and ring bearer, opt for age-appropriate tunes. Songs like "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" or "The Sound of Music" can be perfect for their entrance while still creating a whimsical and charming atmosphere.
Discuss with your partner and musicians
Communication is key when choosing the processional song. Discuss your preferences with your partner and any musicians or DJs you've hired. Be open to their suggestions and feedback, as they may have valuable insights or ideas that you haven't considered. Remember, it's your special day, so choose music that reflects your tastes and creates lasting memories.
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Frequently asked questions
It's up to you and your partner. If you want to hear the explicit versions of songs at your wedding, go for it! If you don't, don't! Just be aware that weddings tend to have guests of all ages and backgrounds, so it's likely that at least some of your guests will be annoyed or offended by explicit music.
Music sets the tone, stirs up emotions, and shares a message with your guests, so picking the right songs is important. Think about songs that are meaningful to you and your partner. They might remind you of a great summer at a music festival, or the first time you stayed up talking all night. You could also choose a traditional piece that sets the right tone. Just make sure you read the lyrics before pressing play—you don't want to accidentally play a breakup song!
A basic wedding ceremony music program involves preludes, processionals, and recessionals. Most couples choose three or four songs throughout their ceremony: one for walking down the aisle, one for signing the register, and then one or two as they leave the ceremony room. You might also want some music before the ceremony starts while people are taking their seats.
Yes, you'll want to avoid songs that are cheesy, overplayed, or inappropriate. Songs like "The Chicken Dance," "Single Ladies," and "Who Let the Dogs Out" may cause your guests to evacuate the dance floor. You'll also want to avoid songs with creepy or stalkerish lyrics, like "Every Breath You Take" by The Police, or allusions to infidelity or breakups.
It's up to you and your partner! You can also hire a live musician, like a classical harpist or a jazz musician, to play the songs you want to hear. If you hire a DJ or a band, make sure to chat with them about songs you love and those you'd rather avoid. They'll likely ask you to provide a list of "do not play" songs.
