Lawyer At Your Wedding: Good Idea Or Not?

Wedding invitation etiquette can be a tricky business, especially when it comes to addressing guests with professional titles. If you're inviting a lawyer to your wedding, you may be wondering if you should use their professional title or simply address them as you would any other guest. The good news is that you have options! While it is considered proper etiquette to address lawyers as Esquire or Esq. on the outer envelope, it is not required. You can simply address them as Mr., Mrs., or Ms. [Last Name] on the outer envelope, and the same or just their title and last name on the inner envelope. So, whether you choose to go with formal titles or a more casual approach, the choice is ultimately up to you!

Lawyer's name on the invitation

When addressing a wedding invitation to a lawyer, there are a few options to consider. Firstly, it is acceptable to use their complete name followed by a comma and "Esq." for formality. However, this is no longer necessary, and you can address them as you would any other guest, using their preferred title and full name.

For the outer envelope, you can write "Mr./Ms./Mrs. [Name] [Surname], Esq." or simply "Mr./Ms./Mrs. [Name] [Surname]". For the inner envelope, you can use their title and surname, such as "Mr./Ms./Mrs. [Surname]".

If you are inviting a married couple where one or both partners are lawyers, you can address them as "Mr. and Mrs. [Surname]" on the outer envelope. If they have different surnames, you can write their names on the same line, with the woman's name first, or on separate lines. For the inner envelope, you can use their titles and surnames or just their first names.

Outer envelope:

• Mr. Jackson Smith, Esq.
• Mrs. Ana Smith, Esq. and Mr. Jackson Smith (if the wife is the lawyer)
• Ana Smith, Esq. and Jackson Smith, Esq. (if both are lawyers)

Inner envelope:

• Mr. Smith
• Mr. and Mrs. Smith

In summary, when addressing a lawyer on a wedding invitation, you have the option to use "Esq." after their name, but it is not required. You can address them using their preferred title and full name, just as you would for any other guest.

Lawyer's partner

When inviting a lawyer and their partner to your wedding, you should apply the same etiquette as you would when addressing other guests from the same household.

For a married couple with the same last name, the outer envelope can be addressed as:

• " [Name] Esq. and Mrs. [Name]" or " [Name] and Mrs. [Name]"
• "Mr. and Mrs. [Name]"

The inner envelope can be addressed as:

• "Mr. and Mrs. [Name]"
• " [Name] and [Name]"

For a married couple with different last names, the outer envelope can be addressed as:

• " [Name] Esq. and Mr. [Name]"
• "Mrs. [Name] and Mr. [Name]"

The inner envelope can be addressed as:

• "Mr. and Mrs. [Name]"
• " [Name] and [Name]"

For a married couple with one hyphenated last name, the outer envelope can be addressed as:

• " [Name] Esq. and Mr. [Name]-[Name]"
• "Mrs. [Name]-[Name] and Mr. [Name]"

The inner envelope can be addressed as:

• "Mr. and Mrs. [Name]"
• " [Name] and [Name]"

If the lawyer and their partner are an unmarried couple, both names should be included on one line on the outer envelope. The person whom you are closest with should be listed first. The outer envelope can be addressed as:

• " [Name] Esq. and Mr./Ms. [Name]"
• "Mrs./Ms. [Name] and Mr. [Name]"

The inner envelope can be addressed as:

" [Name] and [Name]"

When addressing a lawyer on a wedding invitation, it is no longer necessary to use "Esq.". Instead, you can address them as "Mr." or "Mrs.", similar to how you would address other wedding guests.

Formality of the wedding

The formality of your wedding is an important consideration when deciding whether to invite your lawyer. If you're planning a formal affair, the invitation should reflect this, with a focus on correct titles and formal wording. On the other hand, if you're having a casual celebration, you may be able to take a more relaxed approach to the invitations, although it's still important to maintain a level of formality, especially for older or more conservative guests.

For a formal wedding, the outer envelope of the invitation is key. This is the envelope that will be seen by the post office and will bear the stamps and address of the recipients. Traditionally, this envelope is more formal, using titles and full names. For example, for a married couple with the same last name, the outer envelope would be addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren". For a single guest, you would use their title and full name, such as "Ms. Stephanie Chen".

If your lawyer is married, you would follow the standard format for married couples, using their shared last name. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Jackson Smith". If your lawyer is unmarried, you would use their title and full name, such as "Ms. Ana Smith".

The inner envelope, which is considered more informal, can be more flexible. For a married couple, you can use their first names and last name, such as "Thomas and Michelle". For a single guest, you can use just their first name, such as "Stephanie".

If your lawyer is bringing a guest, you would follow the standard etiquette for couples. If your lawyer is married or in a heterosexual relationship, the woman's name is listed first, followed by the man's name. For example, "Ana Smith, Esq. and Mr. Jackson Smith". If your lawyer is in a same-sex relationship, either name can go first. On the inner envelope, you would use their shared last name, such as "Mr. and Mrs. Smith".

In terms of titles, it is acceptable to address a lawyer as "Esq." on the outer envelope, followed by their name. However, this is not a requirement, and you can simply use "Mr." or "Ms." instead. The title "Esq." is more commonly used in a business context and is not necessary for a wedding invitation.

Remember, the key to a formal wedding invitation is correct titles and a standard format. By following these guidelines, you can ensure that your lawyer's invitation is consistent with the tone and formality of your wedding.

Lawyer's gender

When it comes to addressing wedding invitations, the gender of the lawyer you are inviting is an important consideration. Here are some guidelines to ensure you use the correct titles and maintain formality:

Addressing a Male Lawyer

If you are inviting a male lawyer, you can address the outer envelope as "Mr." followed by his full name. For example, "Mr. Jackson Smith". The inner envelope can simply include his title and last name, such as "Mr. Smith".

If the male lawyer is unmarried and living with a partner, you can address them on the same line on the outer envelope. For example, "Mr. Jackson Smith and Ms. Ana Jones". The inner envelope can then be addressed as "Mr. Smith and Ms. Jones".

Addressing a Female Lawyer

When inviting a female lawyer, you have a few options. You can use the title "Esq." followed by her name, such as "Ana Jones, Esq." on the outer envelope. However, this is not a requirement, and you can instead use "Ms." or "Mrs." followed by her name, such as "Ms. Ana Jones" or "Mrs. Ana Jones". The inner envelope can then be addressed with her title and last name, such as "Ms. Jones".

If the female lawyer is unmarried and living with a partner, you can address the outer envelope as "Ms. Ana Jones and Mr. Jackson Smith". The inner envelope can then include their titles and last names, such as "Ms. Jones and Mr. Smith".

Addressing a Couple Where One or Both Partners are Lawyers

When inviting a couple where one or both partners are lawyers, you can use a combination of the above formats. For example, if the female partner is a lawyer and the male partner is not, the outer envelope can be addressed as "Ana Smith, Esq. and Mr. Jackson Smith" or "Mrs. Ana Smith and Mr. Jackson Smith". The inner envelope can then be "Mr. and Mrs. Smith".

If both partners are lawyers, you can address the outer envelope as "Ana Smith, Esq. and Jackson Smith, Esq." or "Mr. and Mrs. Jackson Smith". The inner envelope can follow the same format or simply include their titles and last names, such as "Mr. and Mrs. Smith".

Additional Considerations

It is worth noting that the use of "Esq." is becoming less common on wedding invitations, and you may choose to address lawyers in the same way you would address other guests. Additionally, when addressing unmarried couples, always list the person you are closest with first, regardless of gender.

Other guests with special degrees

When it comes to guests with distinguished titles, such as doctors, lawyers, judges, or military personnel, it is proper etiquette to address them by their title on the wedding invitation envelope.

Judges

For a judge, the outer envelope should be addressed to "The Honourable [Name]" and the inner envelope to "Judge [Name]". If you are also inviting their spouse and the judge is the wife, the outer envelope would be addressed to "The Honourable [Name of Wife] and [Name of Spouse]". The inner envelope would then be addressed to "Judge [Name of Wife] and [Name of Spouse]".

Lawyers

For a lawyer, the outer envelope can be addressed to either " [Name], Esq." or "Mr./Ms./Mrs. [Name]". The inner envelope can simply include their title and last name, such as "Mr./Ms./Mrs. [Last Name]". If you are inviting a couple where both partners are lawyers, the outer envelope can be addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. [Name]" or "[Name], Esq. and [Name], Esq.". The inner envelope would then be addressed to "Mr. and Mrs. [Last Name]".

Doctors

For a married couple where one person is a doctor, the outer envelope can be addressed to "Doctor [Name of Doctor] and [Name of Spouse]". If the names are too long, you can list them separately. The inner envelope would then be addressed to "Dr. [Last Name of Doctor] and [Last Name of Spouse]" or just their first names. If both partners are doctors, the outer envelope can be addressed to "The Doctors [Last Name]" or "Drs. [Name] and [Name]". The inner envelope would then be "The Doctors [Last Name]" or "[Name] and [Name]".

Military Personnel

For military personnel, the outer envelope should be addressed to their military title and name, such as "Lieutenant [Name], US Navy". If both partners hold military titles, their names can be listed with their titles. For example, "Captains [Name] and [Name], US Navy". The inner envelope would then be addressed to their title and last name, such as "Lieutenant [Last Name]" or "The Captains [Last Name]".

Professors

For a university professor, the outer envelope can be addressed to either "Professor [Name]" or " [Name], Ph.D.". The inner envelope can be addressed to either "Professor [Last Name]" or "Dr. [Last Name]".

If you are inviting other guests with special degrees or professional titles, it is appropriate to address them by their title on the outer envelope. For example, "Reverend [Name]" or "Captain [Name]". The inner envelope can be more informal, including just their title and last name or their first name, depending on your preference.

Frequently asked questions