Selecting The Perfect Wedding Date With Bridesmaids

Planning a wedding is an exciting time, but it can also be stressful. One of the first steps is to select your bridal party, and it's important to give this decision a lot of thought. Bridesmaids will be involved in a lot of the planning and pre-wedding events, so it's a good idea to ask your closest friends and family members to take on this role. While it's tempting to ask people right away, it's recommended to wait until you know your wedding date and other details, and to give your bridal party enough time to plan and commit. This means asking them to be your bridesmaid anywhere between a year to eight months before the wedding. Once you've chosen your bridesmaids, it's a good idea to discuss the wedding vision and their responsibilities to ensure everyone is on the same page.

Asking bridesmaids too soon

Asking your bridesmaids to be part of your wedding party is one of the most exciting parts of getting engaged and planning your wedding. However, it's important not to rush into it and ask them too soon. Here are some reasons why:

Plans Change

First of all, plans can change. You might initially think you want 12 bridesmaids, but as you start planning and considering the size of your wedding, you may realise that's too many and three is a more suitable number. You may also want to wait to see how many groomsmen your fiancé wants to have and come up with a joint number together. Asking your bridesmaids too soon might result in you having to go back and forth, adding and removing people from your bridal party, which can cause unnecessary stress and drama.

Relationships Change

People grow apart, and this is a natural part of life. Asking your bridesmaids too soon might mean that, by the time your wedding comes around, you're no longer close to some of them. This can create an awkward situation and cause hurt feelings. It's also much harder to demote someone than to wait and be sure about your decision. On the other hand, by waiting, you might become closer to other people and wish you could include them.

Too Early to Need Them

If your wedding is over a year away, it's too early to need your bridesmaids for anything. They won't need to buy dresses or plan bridal showers for a while, and asking them to commit to being a bridesmaid two years in advance is a long time. It's best to wait until you have more details about your wedding date and plans before asking them to be part of your bridal party.

Give Yourself Time to Think

It's important to give yourself time to think about who you want in your bridal party. If your wedding is happening a year or two after your engagement, take the time to consider who you want to be there for you throughout the wedding planning process and on your big day. Think about who your lifelong friends are and who will be able to help you with the wedding details.

In summary, it's best to wait until between one year and eight months before your wedding to ask your bridesmaids. This gives you time to plan and consider your bridal party numbers and gives your bridesmaids enough time to plan the bachelorette party and get their dresses.

Bridesmaid availability

When it comes to bridesmaid availability, it is important to consider the time and effort required of them. Bridesmaids play a crucial role in the wedding planning process and on the big day itself. It is recommended to ask your chosen friends and family members to be your bridesmaids anywhere between a year to eight months before the wedding. This gives them enough time to plan the bachelorette party and get their dresses.

When selecting your bridesmaids, it is advisable to wait until you know your wedding date. Knowing the date allows your bridesmaids to determine their availability and whether they can commit to the role. It is also essential to consider their personal circumstances, as the date might overlap with other commitments, such as another wedding, a major life change, or other obligations.

Being a bridesmaid comes with financial, emotional, and time commitments. Before popping the question, it is beneficial to communicate openly about the expectations and responsibilities involved. This includes discussing pre-wedding events, financial contributions, and the level of involvement expected from each bridesmaid.

Additionally, it is worth noting that the dynamics within the bridal party can vary, and not all bridesmaids may know each other. As a result, it is important to foster a harmonious atmosphere and avoid any unnecessary drama.

In summary, when considering bridesmaid availability, allow ample time for planning, be mindful of their personal circumstances, communicate expectations clearly, and encourage a positive group dynamic. By doing so, you can ensure the availability and active participation of your chosen bridesmaids on your special day.

Bridesmaid duties

Pre-Wedding Duties:

• Planning and paying for the bridal shower and bachelorette party, often led by the maid of honor.
• Attending all pre-wedding events, such as engagement parties, couples' showers, and wedding DIY sessions.
• Booking travel and accommodation for the wedding weekend, ensuring convenience for the schedule and location of events.
• Attending the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner to familiarise themselves with the ceremony flow and provide emotional support.
• Being emotionally available for the bride, offering a listening ear and helping to reduce planning stress.
• Assisting with smaller wedding planning tasks, such as stuffing envelopes, alphabetising escort cards, DIY projects, or accompanying the bride to appointments.
• Purchasing a wedding gift for the couple from their registry or chipping in for a larger group gift.
• Shopping for and paying for bridesmaid attire, including dresses, jewellery, and shoes, following the bride's preferences.

On the Wedding Day:

• Getting ready with the bride, providing snacks and drinks, and ensuring she stays calm, hydrated, and well-fed.
• Assisting the maid of honour with any tasks, such as last-minute errands or coordinating with vendors.
• Being the "bride tribe" by embodying the role of the support crew for the bride and maid of honour.
• Participating in the ceremony by processing down the aisle, fulfilling assigned roles, and posing for group photographs.
• Mingling with guests, signing the guest book, visiting the photo booth, and generally being the life of the party while maintaining good guest behaviour.
• Helping with the send-off by assembling items to be transported out of the venue and ensuring guests and vendors depart smoothly.

Post-Wedding Duties:

• Offering to help with leftover items, returns, or rentals, especially for DIY weddings.
• Creating a digital collection of photos and videos taken by the wedding party for the couple to enjoy while awaiting professional photos.
• Staying excited to see the professional photos and video when they are ready, sharing in the couple's anticipation.

Bridesmaid dress

When it comes to bridesmaid dresses, there are several factors to consider. Firstly, it's important to give your bridesmaids enough time to plan and order their dresses. It's recommended to ask your friends and family members to be your bridesmaids anywhere between a year to eight months before your wedding. This will give them ample time to prepare.

The style of the bridesmaid dresses is another important consideration. You may want to choose a style that complements your wedding dress or reflects your personality. Some popular styles include romantic ruffles, dreamy chiffon, sequined gowns, short dresses, or skater skirts. You can also choose to have a uniform style for all your bridesmaids or allow them to express their unique personalities with different dresses.

When selecting a colour, consider your wedding theme and colour scheme. Online retailers like Lulus offer a wide range of colours, from elegant black, navy, grey, and maroon to rustic pink or cream-coloured lace. You can also explore unconventional colours like dusty lilac or moss green. Additionally, don't forget to accessorize! A nice pair of earrings or a necklace can double as a thoughtful bridesmaid gift.

To make the process more manageable, you can order free colour swatches from websites like Kennedy Blue to try out different shades before committing. They also offer a range of sizes, from 00 to 32, ensuring that everyone can find a dress that fits perfectly. Birdy Grey is another affordable option, with dresses starting at $99 and featuring a variety of styles and colours.

Bridesmaid expenses

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it can also be a major financial commitment. Here are some of the costs that bridesmaids typically need to consider:

Outfits and Accessories

Bridesmaids are usually expected to pay for their own outfits, including dresses, tuxedos, suits, and shoes. The bride may give instructions on style, fit, and colour, or allow the bridesmaids to choose their own outfits within a certain theme. It's important to be mindful of the financial commitment this may entail, especially if the bride has her heart set on expensive or custom attire.

Bridal Shower or Wedding Shower

The bridal shower is typically hosted and paid for by the maid of honour or the bride's mother. However, bridesmaids may also be expected to contribute financially, especially if they are actively involved in planning the event. It's essential to communicate clearly and decide on a budget that everyone is comfortable with.

Bachelorette Party

Bridesmaids typically plan and pay for the bachelorette party, covering their own costs and sometimes chipping in for the bride's expenses as well. It's important to discuss financial expectations and decide on a location and activities that are affordable for everyone.

Travel and Accommodations

Bridesmaids are usually responsible for their own travel and lodging for the wedding and any pre-wedding events, such as the bachelorette party. This can quickly add up, especially for destination weddings or far-flung celebrations. Couples should be mindful of the financial burden they are placing on their bridal party and consider offering discounted rates or contributing to travel costs if possible.

Wedding Day Essentials

Bridesmaids are also responsible for bringing their own wedding day essentials, such as toiletries, medicine, touch-up makeup, and a change of clothes. While the couple may provide emergency kits, it's always a good idea for bridesmaids to be prepared and bring their own supplies.

Gifts

While not mandatory, it is customary for bridesmaids to give a gift to the couple. This could be something small from the couple's registry or a group gift purchased by all the bridesmaids.

Hair and Makeup

Whether or not bridesmaids are expected to pay for professional hair and makeup services depends on the couple's budget and preferences. If the bride requires a certain look, it is considerate to offer to cover the cost as a gift. If it is optional, then covering these services is a generous offer.

Being a bridesmaid comes with financial responsibilities, and it's important to be transparent and communicate openly about money matters. It's perfectly acceptable for bridesmaids to express their concerns and set boundaries on what they can afford.

Frequently asked questions