
A bride-to-be recently sparked a debate after seeking advice on whether to mention her class rank in her wedding vows. The bride, a law school graduate, wanted to include her class rank from a T14 program in the couple's vows, despite her fiancé's objections. While the bride argued for a casual mention, acknowledging her fiancé's support during her academic journey, critics pointed out that a wedding is a formal occasion, and such a mention could shift the focus of the vows onto the bride's accomplishments. The incident raises questions about the appropriateness of including academic achievements in wedding vows and the potential impact on the couple's dynamic.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Bride's opinion | Wants to include her class rank in the wedding vows |
| Groom's opinion | Does not want the bride to include her class rank in the wedding vows |
| Bride's justification | Wants to mention it in a casual manner, something humble that makes the groom seem like the good guy |
| Criticism | It centers the vows back on the bride, fishing for recognition from the audience |
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What You'll Learn

The bride wants to include her class rank in her wedding vows
A bride-to-be recently sought advice from the r/LawSchool community regarding her desire to include her class rank in her wedding vows. The bride, a law school graduate, wanted to mention her class rank from a T14 program in the couple's vows. While the bride was adamant about showcasing her academic achievements, her fiancé was not supportive of the idea.
The bride's initial attempt to include her class rank in the vows did not survive the groom's edits. She then sought support from the online community, but most people advised against it. It is important to distinguish between mentioning an achievement casually and including it in wedding vows, which are meant to be a solemn and formal declaration of love and commitment.
The bride suggested a casual approach, such as "Baby, without you, I wouldn't have been able to graduate _x_ from law school." However, this still shifts the focus back to her accomplishments and only tangentially makes the groom seem like the supportive partner. Wedding vows are meant to celebrate the union between two people and their love for each other, not individual achievements.
While the bride's academic success is commendable, it is important to respect the opinions and comfort levels of both partners when crafting wedding vows. The couple should work together to find a compromise that highlights their journey as a couple and their shared experiences, rather than individual accomplishments.
In conclusion, while the bride's class rank is an important part of her identity and achievements, it may not be appropriate to include it in the wedding vows. A possible solution could be to find other ways to celebrate and acknowledge her academic success during the wedding celebrations or in the wedding speech, where the focus is more flexible and can include individual achievements.
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The groom doesn't want her to mention it
It is understandable that the bride wants to include her class rank in her wedding vows, especially considering her impressive academic record. However, it is also important to respect the groom's wishes and find alternative ways to highlight the bride's accomplishments.
The wedding day is a ceremony crafted to celebrate the union of two individuals, and the vows are a pivotal moment where the couple delivers promises to one another. While the bride's intention to include her class rank may be well-meaning, it is essential to consider the groom's perspective and the overall tone of the vows.
Including academic achievements in wedding vows can detract from the sentiment of the occasion and come across as self-centred. The groom's reluctance to include the bride's class rank in the vows is valid, as the focus should be on their commitment to each other rather than individual accomplishments.
To address this situation, the bride could consider alternative ways to showcase her academic achievements. For example, she could mention her class rank in a speech or have it highlighted in the wedding programme or other wedding literature. This way, her accomplishments can be recognised without overshadowing the significance of the wedding vows.
Additionally, the bride and groom could work together to find a compromise that acknowledges her achievements while ensuring the vows remain focused on their love and commitment. This could be a more subtle reference to her academic success or a joint acknowledgment of their shared pride in her accomplishments.
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The bride seeks advice from an online community
A bride-to-be recently sought the advice of the online community r/LawSchool regarding the content of her upcoming wedding vows. The bride, a law school graduate, wanted to include her class rank from a T14 program in the couple's vows. She suggested phrasing it in a casual way, such as "Baby, without you, I wouldn't have been able to graduate from law school." However, her fiancé was not in favour of including this detail in the vows.
The bride's post sparked a range of responses from the online community. Some people found the idea humorous, while others offered more serious advice. One commenter pointed out the difference between mentioning something in a casual manner and including it in wedding vows, which are typically a formal and solemn occasion. They also noted that the bride's suggestion of phrasing still centred the vows on herself and her accomplishments, rather than focusing on the groom or their relationship.
The bride's decision to outsource the matter to the online community indicates that she may not be fully respecting her fiancé's opinion on the matter. Wedding vows are typically a declaration of love and commitment between two people, and it is important to consider the feelings and opinions of both individuals involved. While the bride may be proud of her academic achievements, there are other ways to acknowledge and celebrate her accomplishments outside of the wedding vows.
The online community offered a valuable perspective on the matter, highlighting the importance of balancing personal achievements with the significance of the wedding vows. While it is natural to want to share accomplishments with loved ones, the wedding vows may not be the most appropriate platform for this expression. The bride may benefit from considering the feedback received and finding alternative ways to honour her academic record while respecting the wishes of her fiancé.
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The groom refuses the class rank dowry offer
A bride-to-be recently sought advice from the r/LawSchool community regarding her wedding vows. The bride, a law school graduate, wanted to include her class rank in the couple's vows. However, her fiancé was not in favour of this idea and refused to include it. The bride's insistence on mentioning her class rank in the wedding vows can be seen as a form of "class rank dowry offer", which the groom rightfully refused.
The concept of a dowry is a long-standing tradition in many cultures, where property or monetary value is transferred to the bride or groom's family. While the specifics of dowry practices vary across cultures, it often serves as a gift or a form of financial security for the bride. In some cultures, such as Hindu traditions, the bride's family typically provides the dowry to the groom or his family. On the other hand, in Muslim cultures, it is customary for the groom to offer a gift to the bride.
The bride's insistence on including her class rank in the wedding vows can be interpreted as an attempt to showcase her academic achievements and elevate her own accomplishments within the context of the wedding. By mentioning her class rank, the bride is shifting the focus of the vows onto herself, rather than on the commitment and love between the couple. This act of self-aggrandizement during a wedding ceremony is generally considered inappropriate and egotistical.
The groom's refusal to include the bride's class rank in the wedding vows demonstrates his respect for the sanctity of the wedding ceremony and his commitment to their union. By rejecting the "class rank dowry offer", the groom is prioritizing their shared vows and the significance of the occasion. He recognizes that a wedding is a formal and solemn event, not a platform to boast about individual achievements.
While the bride may have intended to casually mention her class rank, the wedding vows are not the appropriate venue for such a statement. The vows are meant to be a heartfelt expression of love, commitment, and devotion between the couple. By excluding the class rank mention, the groom is ensuring that their wedding vows remain focused on their mutual promises and the depth of their love for each other.
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The bride suggests a humble mention of her achievement
A bride-to-be has sparked a debate by asking for advice on whether she should mention her class rank in her wedding vows. The bride, a law school graduate, wants to include her class rank from a T14 program in the couple's vows. While the groom is not in favour of the idea, the bride is considering a humble mention of her achievement.
The bride's initial suggestion was to include a clause in the vows that said something like, "Baby, without you, I wouldn't have been able to graduate from law school." This approach acknowledges her academic record while also giving credit to her partner and recognising the role he played in her success.
However, some people have criticised even this humble mention of her class rank. They argue that a wedding is a formal occasion and that including her achievement in the vows would shift the focus back to the bride and her accomplishments. It has been suggested that mentioning her class rank, even in a casual manner, is not truly humble and that it would be more appropriate to find another way to recognise her academic success, perhaps in a speech or toast at the wedding reception.
Despite the criticism, the bride appears determined to find a way to include her class rank in the vows. It is unclear if she has considered alternative ways to recognise her achievement, such as including it in a more light-hearted moment during the wedding celebrations or even incorporating it into her wedding speech. Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to mention her class rank in the wedding vows rests with the bride and groom, who may need to carefully consider their priorities and what is meaningful to them as a couple.
In conclusion, while the bride suggests a humble mention of her class rank in the wedding vows, it is a delicate matter that requires sensitivity to the feelings of both parties and careful consideration of the tone and formality of the wedding ceremony.
Frequently asked questions
No. A wedding is a formal occasion, and mentioning your class rank in your vows may come across as bragging or fishing for recognition from the audience. It's important to keep the focus of the vows on your partner and your commitment to each other.
You could consider mentioning your academic achievements in a casual and humble way that gives credit to your partner. For example, "Baby, without you, I wouldn't have been able to graduate from law school."
There are other opportunities to highlight your educational background besides the wedding vows. You could, for instance, mention your class rank in a speech or toast, or include it in a wedding programme or display.
Your partner may feel that including your class rank in the vows takes the focus away from the seriousness of the occasion and your commitment to each other. It's important to respect their wishes and find other ways to celebrate your academic achievements.


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