Wedding Band: To Buy Or Not To Buy?

There are a lot of things to consider when deciding whether to buy your girlfriend a wedding band. Firstly, it's important to note that giving someone a ring often signifies a serious, committed relationship, and it may be misinterpreted as an engagement ring. Secondly, wedding bands are traditionally exchanged during the wedding ceremony as a symbol of unity and marriage. Therefore, it may be more appropriate to wait until the wedding day to exchange bands with your partner. Additionally, it's worth considering your partner's preferences and the financial implications of purchasing a wedding band. Discussing wedding expenses openly and deciding on a budget that works for both of you is essential.

Who should buy the wedding band?

Wedding ring traditions have evolved over the years, and while there are no set rules, there are some conventions that have guided couples in the past. Traditionally, the bride (and/or her family) buys the groom's wedding ring, and the groom (and/or his family) pays for the bride's. This tradition assumes a binary couple and can be adapted to fit any couple, with each half of the couple expected to pay for their other half's wedding band.

In modern times, wedding bands are often purchased by the couple together, with some couples choosing to split the cost. This is a common approach, especially if the couple has already combined their finances or is paying for the wedding together. It is not necessary for each partner to contribute an equal amount, and costs can be divided proportionally according to income. Some couples may also opt to buy their own rings, with each partner covering a different wedding expense.

For those who want to stick to a more traditional approach, there are a few options. The bride's family could purchase the groom's ring, or the groom could buy both rings. Alternatively, the groom could purchase the engagement ring, and the bride could buy the wedding bands.

The most important thing is to communicate and decide together what works best for the couple. Discussing finances can be challenging, but it is essential to have open and honest conversations about money before the wedding.

What's the difference between an engagement ring and a wedding band?

There are several differences between an engagement ring and a wedding band. Firstly, an engagement ring is usually given when proposing or at an early point in the engagement, while a wedding band is traditionally exchanged during the wedding ceremony. Engagement rings typically feature a dominant stone, either on its own or surrounded by smaller stones, whereas wedding bands are usually simpler, often just a plain metal band or a diamond-encrusted eternity band.

Engagement rings are often more expensive than wedding bands due to the larger central stone and higher carat weight. The wedding band usually has a smaller carat weight, even if it is encrusted with gemstones, and is therefore more affordable.

Traditionally, the engagement ring and wedding band are worn together on the fourth finger of the left hand, with the wedding band on the inside, closer to the heart. However, some people choose to wear the rings separately or stack them with additional rings. Ultimately, the decision of how to wear the rings comes down to personal preference.

What are some wedding band traditions?

Wedding bands are steeped in tradition, with the exchanging of rings being one of the most traditional exercises in marriage. The following are some of the traditions associated with wedding bands:

The History of the Wedding Band

The tradition of exchanging wedding bands dates back to ancient times, with ancient Egyptian scrolls depicting couples exchanging braided rings made from hemp or reeds. As these materials were not durable, they were eventually replaced by rings made from leather, bone, or ivory. The ancient Romans, who used iron rings, are believed to be the originators of today's metal wedding bands. The Romans also started the practice of engraving rings, and they, along with the Greeks, placed the ring on the fourth finger of the left hand because they believed that the finger contained the 'vena amoris' or 'vein of love'.

The Double-Ring Ceremony

In several European nations, such as the Nordic countries, it is common to exchange plain engagement rings, and during the wedding ceremony, the bride is given an additional, more precious, bejeweled wedding ring. In some cultures, the groom's ring becomes a wedding ring during the nuptials and is bestowed upon him by the bride.

The Gimmel Ring

During the 16th and 17th centuries, gimmel rings, which consisted of two interlocking bands, were popular. After their engagement, both the bride and groom would wear one of these bands, and the two bands would be reunited and placed on the bride's finger during the wedding ceremony.

The Poesy Ring

The poesy ring was a style of ring that was popular during the Renaissance era. It was a band of sterling silver inscribed with a poem or 'poesy'.

The Fede Ring

The fede ring, a band consisting of two hands clasped in betrothal, is another historical custom of Europe that dates back to ancient times.

The Puzzle Ring

According to popular legend, in the Middle East, a puzzle ring consisting of several bands that interlock to create a finished ring, would be given by the husband. If the wife removed it, the bands would fall apart, and she would be unable to reassemble it.

What are some tips for shopping for a wedding band?

Shopping for a wedding band can be a fun and romantic experience for you and your partner. Here are some tips to help guide you through the process:

Start Early

It is recommended to start wedding ring shopping about three months before the wedding to give yourself plenty of time to find the perfect band without feeling rushed. If you want a custom-made ring, you should allow even more time.

Do Your Research

Before you start shopping, it is important to have a budget in mind and to do some browsing online to get a sense of the different styles and collections available. It is also a good idea to get your fingers professionally sized before you begin.

Think About Personalization and Matching

Consider whether you want to personalize your rings, for example, by engraving a date or adding a hidden birthstone. You will also need to decide if you want your ring to match your partner's.

Consider Your Lifestyle

It is important to choose a ring that fits your lifestyle. If you have an active lifestyle, you may want to choose a ring that is practical and comfortable for everyday wear. Contemporary metals such as titanium, palladium, or tungsten are good options for men, while women may prefer plain metals with few or no diamonds.

Complement Your Favourite Jewellery

Think about the jewellery you already wear, such as your engagement ring, and choose a wedding band that complements it. For example, most brides tend to choose a diamond band in the same metal as their engagement ring.

Be Careful with Your Budget

It is easy to overspend when shopping for a wedding band, as the style, thickness, and size can all affect the price. However, as long as you don't go overboard, it may be worth splurging a bit on a ring that you'll wear every day.

What are some alternatives to a traditional wedding band?

There are many alternatives to a traditional wedding band for those who are less inclined to wear rings or are unable to due to work or health conditions. Here are some options for those seeking a non-traditional way to seal their vows:

Tattoos

A tattoo on the ring finger is a popular alternative, symbolising the union in a permanent way. Couples may also opt for a tattoo of their partner's name, the wedding date, or a phrase from their vows. Other popular locations for wedding tattoos include the chest and back.

Framed Wedding Certificate

For those who prefer not to wear a symbol of their love, displaying their wedding certificate in their home can be a meaningful alternative. Couples can choose from a wide variety of custom frames and even add creative touches such as their favourite photos from their wedding.

Matching Necklaces or Bracelets

Matching necklaces or bracelets are a great option for those who still wish to wear something that connects them to their partner. These can be customised with engravings or personalised pendants featuring the wedding date or partner's name. Materials can range from simple leather to more classic options like gold or sterling silver.

Gemstone or Crystal

For those who are spiritual, exchanging gemstones or crystals that represent their partner's characteristics or their own can be a meaningful alternative. This alternative strengthens the marriage bond on a spiritual level rather than a material one.

Silicone Wedding Bands

Silicone wedding bands are a modern, affordable, and flexible option for those who are not fans of flashy jewellery. These bands are simple, youthful, and can be worn in a wide variety of situations. They are also a safer option for those with concerns about wearing traditional wedding bands at work or during athletic activities.

Ultimately, what matters most is what you and your spouse are interested in. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to wedding bands, and couples can choose to opt for an alternative from the start or explore alternatives like tattoos or puzzle rings later on.

Frequently asked questions