Planning A Wedding: Is The Stress Worthwhile?

Planning a wedding can be a stressful and daunting task. It is often the largest event that a person has ever had to organise, and there are many aspects to consider, from the budget to the venue, the guest list, the date, the dress, the food, the entertainment, and more. It can be difficult to know where to start, and many couples feel overwhelmed. Wedding planning guides and checklists can be very helpful, and some couples opt to hire a wedding planner to assist with the process. However, planning a wedding can also be fun and exciting, and it is an opportunity for the couple to work together towards a common goal, which can strengthen their relationship.

Budgeting and costs

Firstly, decide who will be contributing financially to the wedding. Traditionally, the bride's parents covered the expenses, but this is no longer the norm. Discuss with your family members what they are comfortable spending. If you are self-funding, assess your finances and prepare for any necessary changes.

Next, determine your budget. Tools like The Knot Wedding Budget Tool can help estimate costs based on your location and the average spending of other couples. Wedding budgets should be tailored to your priorities and circumstances. Consider the following categories and how they apply to your wedding:

• Venue: The venue is typically the largest expense. If you have a separate ceremony and reception venue, you will need to budget for both.
• Rentals: This includes tables, chairs, dishes, silverware, and glassware. Sometimes these are included in the venue cost, but not always.
• Catering: Catering is another significant expense, contributing to around 24% of the average wedding budget. This includes food and cocktail hour, as well as service costs for staff.
• Alcohol and Bartending: Alcohol, custom cocktails, and bartending services are additional costs to consider.
• Photography and Videography: Great wedding photos are a must and often get a large chunk of the budget. Photography costs include a photographer, a second shooter, travel costs, and an engagement photoshoot. Some couples opt out of videography to save money.
• Beauty Treatments: Manicures, haircuts, coloring, facials, and skincare are expenses to consider leading up to the wedding.
• Wedding Bands and Insurance: Don't forget to budget for your wedding rings and insurance for them.
• Wedding Cake and Desserts: The cost of the cake and any cake-cutting fees should be included in your budget. Many couples are now opting for dessert bars instead of a traditional wedding cake.
• Wedding Favors and Gifts: Small gifts for guests and wedding party members are a nice touch.
• Taxes, Tips, and Gratuities: These are often forgotten expenses. While some gratuities are built into vendor contracts, others are not. Be prepared to tip musicians, hairstylists, and other vendors.
• Wedding Planner or Coordinator: Hiring a wedding planner can cost around $2,000 on average, but it can help you save money in the long run. They can leverage relationships with vendors to get you better prices and help you avoid overspending.

Remember to keep a cushion of around 10-15% for unforeseen fees and last-minute changes. It is also important to do your research and be mindful of hidden costs, such as vendor meals, overtime fees, and travel expenses for planning trips.

Wedding planners

Wedding planning can be a stressful and time-consuming process. Couples may find it challenging to know where to start, from dress shopping to touring venues and booking entertainment. This is where wedding planners can step in and provide invaluable assistance in organising and coordinating the nuptials.

However, for couples who desire a stress-free experience, a wedding planner can be a worthwhile investment. They can provide guidance and support throughout the planning process, ensuring that no detail is overlooked. Wedding planners can also serve as a point of contact for vendors, confirming logistics and ensuring a seamless flow on the big day.

To find a reputable wedding planner, couples should look for professionals who are members of established wedding planner organisations. It is also essential to determine the level of involvement desired, as some planners offer full-service planning, while others specialise in day-of coordination.

In conclusion, hiring a wedding planner can be a valuable decision for couples seeking a well-organised and stress-free wedding. By delegating tasks and utilising the planner's expertise, couples can focus on enjoying their special day rather than managing logistics.

Timing and deadlines

Next, it's recommended to wait at least a few weeks after getting engaged before diving into wedding preparations. This allows you to enjoy the "just engaged" phase and share the news with loved ones without feeling pressured to immediately discuss wedding plans. However, if you have a tight schedule or want to get married within a year, it's crucial to start planning sooner rather than later to secure your preferred vendors and venues.

Once you begin planning, it's essential to stay organized and create a timeline and checklist to keep track of tasks and deadlines. This can be done through traditional planning tools like binders or, as suggested by wedding planner Alyssa Meeks, by using digital tools like Google Drive or iCloud to store important documents. Wedding planning guides and checklists are readily available online and in books, and some couples opt to hire a professional wedding planner to handle the logistics and timelines.

As you get closer to the wedding date, there will be several deadlines to keep in mind. These include sending out invitations and save-the-dates, setting an RSVP deadline, and creating a table plan once you have your final guest count. Additionally, marriage licenses typically need to be obtained within a specific time frame before the wedding, and there may be legal considerations to address, such as name changes and financial arrangements.

Finally, it's worth considering your honeymoon plans and whether you want to take a "minimoon" immediately after the wedding and save for a bigger trip later, or if you prefer to go all out on your honeymoon directly after the ceremony.

Venue and vendors

If you decide to hire a wedding planner, it's best to do so before booking your venue. This way, they can help you create a shortlist of venues based on your budget, guest list, desired theme, and location. Wedding planners often know of venues that you can't find online, and they can take the stress out of site visits and negotiating with vendors.

When choosing a venue, there are several factors to consider. Firstly, the venue should be able to accommodate your guest list. You'll also want to think about the catering options, as some venues include catering in their packages, while others have an in-house caterer or a preferred vendors list. Other things to consider include lighting and sound equipment, parking availability, and the level of experience and professionalism of the venue staff.

The cost of the venue will likely be a significant part of your budget, with averages ranging from a few thousand to tens of thousands of dollars, depending on location, type of venue, and season. It's recommended to allocate around 30-40% of your total budget to the venue. If you're working with a tight budget, there are ways to save money. For example, you could choose a venue that allows you to bring your own alcohol or opt for a less traditional venue, such as a public park or a beach.

In addition to the venue, you'll also need to consider other vendors for your wedding. According to the 2019 WeddingWire Newlywed Report, couples hire an average of 14 vendors for their wedding day. These can include caterers, photographers, videographers, hair stylists, makeup artists, stationers, and officiants. Each of these vendors plays an important role in ensuring your big day runs smoothly and creates lasting memories.

Legalities and logistics

Planning a wedding can be a stressful and time-consuming process. It is often the largest event that a person has ever had a role in organizing, and as a result, it can be difficult to know where to start.

One of the first steps in wedding planning is determining the overall budget for the event. This includes figuring out how much of your income can be contributed towards the wedding and whether you will receive financial contributions from family members. It is important to prioritize your spending and identify areas where you can cut costs. Creating a guest list is also crucial, as the cost tiers and venue selection will depend on the number of expected guests.

Another important aspect is obtaining a marriage license within the required time frame. The validity period of a marriage license varies by location, so it is essential to check the regulations in your area. For example, in New York, a marriage license is only valid for 60 calendar days, and the wedding ceremony cannot take place within 24 hours of issuing the license. In contrast, some counties in California allow obtaining the license up to 30 days before the wedding.

Additionally, you should discuss other legal matters, such as name changes and how you will handle finances as a married couple. It is also worth considering wedding insurance to provide peace of mind for you and your partner.

Transportation logistics, including hotel room blocks or shuttle services for guests, should be arranged and communicated through a wedding website or other means. If you are planning an unusual wedding car choice, it is a good idea to research transport links and parking availability at your venue in advance.

To stay organized, it is beneficial to use digital tools to store important documents, such as contracts and invoices, in cloud storage. This allows easy access from your smartphone whenever needed.

Finally, if you feel overwhelmed by the planning process, you can consider hiring a wedding planner or coordinator. They can assist with various tasks, from setting a budget to confirming logistics and arranging timetables. However, it is important to note that their services come at an additional cost, with average prices ranging from $1,055 to $2,300.

Frequently asked questions