Wedding Invitation Etiquette: Double Envelope Ins And Outs

Wedding invitations with two envelopes are called double envelopes. The outer envelope is addressed, sealed, and stamped, while the inner envelope is unsealed and ungummed, containing the invitation card. The use of double envelopes dates back to when mail was delivered by horse and carriage, and served the purpose of keeping the invitation clean and undamaged. While it is no longer necessary, some couples still choose to use two envelopes for practical and visual reasons, such as protecting the invitation from damage during delivery, adding an element of elegance, and providing an opportunity to include envelope liners. Additionally, double envelopes can help clarify who is invited to the wedding, with the outer envelope addressed to the heads of the household and the inner envelope listing the names of each invited individual.

The history of double envelopes

The use of double envelopes for wedding invitations dates back to the Industrial Revolution (circa 1800) and the invention of lithography. Lithography was a cheap printing technique that allowed wedding invitation producers to market their products to the burgeoning middle class. However, the postal service at the time was unreliable, so two envelopes were used: an inner one, unsealed, and an outer one, addressed and used to protect the inner envelope from damage during transit.

The outer envelope was addressed and sealed, while the inner envelope was left unsealed for courtesy and contained the invitation, keeping it clean and free from any marks from mailing. The outer envelope was often damaged or dirty by the time it arrived at its destination, so the clean inner envelope was removed and delivered to the recipient.

In addition to providing protection for the invitation, the double envelope system also served a practical purpose in clarifying who was invited to the wedding. The outer envelope was traditionally addressed using titles, first and last names, while the inner envelope included the names of each individual invited, such as children or plus ones. This helped to avoid any confusion or awkward misunderstandings on the day of the wedding.

Today, the tradition of double envelopes in wedding invitations is not as common, and some couples choose to use other methods to keep the invitation materials together, such as pocketfolds or ribbons. However, double envelopes can still add a touch of elegance and class to a wedding invitation suite, and they remain a popular choice for formal weddings.

Practical reasons for using two envelopes

When planning a wedding, one of the many decisions to make is how to present your wedding invitations. While it may seem unnecessary, there are several practical reasons why couples might choose to use two envelopes for their wedding invitations.

The first and most obvious reason is protection. An additional outer envelope provides an extra layer of protection for the invitation suite, ensuring that it arrives in pristine condition. This is especially important if you have chosen to invest in high-quality, luxurious invitations or have included delicate extras such as ribbon or wax seals. The outer envelope acts as a shield, protecting the inner contents from potential damage during transit. It also keeps the inner envelope and invitation clean, free from dirt, or marks that could occur during the mailing process.

Secondly, using two envelopes can help ensure that your invitations arrive safely and directly into the hands of your intended guests. The outer envelope can be addressed to a specific individual or family, while the inner envelope can be more personalized with the names of each invited guest. This is especially useful if you are inviting families with children, as you can include their names on the inner envelope, making them feel included and excited to attend. This method also helps to clarify who exactly is invited, avoiding any confusion or misinterpretation.

Another practical advantage of the two-envelope system is that it provides an opportunity to include additional information or inserts with your invitation. For instance, you may want to enclose a map or directions to the wedding venue, accommodation suggestions for guests traveling from out of town, or even a small card with your wedding website details. The outer envelope offers a neat and discreet way to package this information, ensuring that it doesn't get separated from the main invitation and providing a cohesive and organized package for your guests.

Finally, from a purely aesthetic standpoint, using two envelopes can elevate the overall presentation of your wedding invitations. The outer envelope sets the tone and creates a sense of anticipation for what's inside. When your guests open the outer envelope, they are greeted with a beautifully intact and pristine invitation, creating a positive first impression. This approach also allows for more flexibility in terms of design and color choices, as you can coordinate or contrast the colors of the envelopes to create a stylish and memorable impact.

While it may add a slight increase in cost and assembly time, the practical benefits of using two envelopes for your wedding invitations are significant. It ensures that your carefully chosen and crafted invitations arrive safely, directly, and in style, setting the right tone for your special day.

Visual reasons for using two envelopes

Wedding invitations with two envelopes are a great way to add a visual flourish to your stationery. The inner envelope provides a crucial place to have fun with colour and pattern. For example, an olive green inner envelope can add energy and life to a mostly neutral invitation suite.

The inner envelope is also a great way to showcase your envelope liners. Since the outer envelope needs to be sealed for mailing, guests will need to tear the top to open it. This means that if your envelope liner is on the outer envelope, they may not be able to see it. The inner envelope does not need to be sealed, so guests can simply lift the flap and see the envelope liner in all its glory.

The use of two envelopes also adds a sense of formality and elegance to your wedding invitations. When your guests receive an invitation carefully packaged inside two envelopes, it signals that this piece of mail is important and that your wedding will be traditional and formal.

Etiquette and addressing envelopes

The use of two envelopes for wedding invitations dates back to the days when mail was delivered by horse and carriage, and the outer envelope would become dirty and damaged by the time it arrived. The inner envelope would remain clean and undamaged, and the invitation would be delivered to the master of the house by the household butler.

Today, the tradition of using two envelopes is no longer necessary, but some couples choose to include them for practical and visual reasons. The outer envelope is addressed, sealed, stamped, and mailed, while the inner envelope houses the invitation and remains unsealed. The inner envelope is also used to address each invited guest by name, including or excluding children and plus ones. This helps to clarify who is invited to the wedding, especially if it is an adults-only event.

When addressing envelopes, there are specific etiquette rules to follow, although these are not strict requirements. The outer envelope is usually more formal, including the recipient's full name and personal title, such as Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Mx. The inner envelope is more informal, allowing for a more casual vibe with first names only or a combination of personal titles and last names.

For married couples with the same last name, the traditional format is "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's full name. For same-sex couples, either name can go first. If the couple prefers a less traditional approach, both first names can be included, such as "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren".

For unmarried couples living at the same address, both names are included on one line, with the person you are closest to listed first. For example, "Mr. Stanley Kim and Ms. Amanda Rhee".

When inviting a single person, the appropriate prefix is used based on their age and gender, such as "Mr." for males, "Ms." for females over 18, and "Miss" for females under 18. If a plus one is offered, it is not necessary to indicate this on the outer envelope; instead, "and guest" can be added to the inner envelope.

For married couples with different last names, their full names are written on the same line, with the woman's name listed first. If the names are too long, they can be listed separately. For example, "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez".

When inviting a family, the outer envelope can be addressed to the whole family or just the parents, while the inner envelope lists the names of the children. If children's names are not included, it implies that they are not invited.

Assembling and mailing invitations

Assembling and mailing wedding invitations can be a confusing process, but it's not rocket science. Here's a step-by-step guide to help you get started:

Step 1: Proofread Your Wedding Invitations

It's important to check for any spelling errors, incorrect dates or times, and the accuracy of venue details, parents' and partners' names, and other important information. Ask a member of your wedding party or your significant other to be a second pair of eyes to catch any mistakes.

Step 2: Confirm the Spelling of Guests' Names

Check that your guests' names and addresses are spelled correctly, whether you've used calligraphy or had them printed. If you're unsure, verify with a family member who knows the guest well. Leave some buffer time in case there are errors and you need to make corrections.

Step 3: Place Them in the Right Order

The wedding invitation etiquette dictates a specific order for placing the cards in the envelope. Typically, each card goes face up in size order, with the largest card on the bottom. Start with the invitation card, followed by the reception card, response card, and any enclosure cards such as a map, direction card, or accommodation card.

Step 4: Add Tissue Paper or a Belly Band (Optional)

You can add a layer of tissue paper on top of the enclosure cards for a traditional touch. Alternatively, use a belly band, ribbon, or vellum wrap to keep the stack of cards together.

Step 5: Insert the Suite into the Inner Envelope (If Using)

If you're using an inner envelope, place the assembled invitation suite inside with the text face up. The inner envelope is usually left unsealed and includes the names of the invited guests, including children if they are invited.

Step 6: Insert into the Outer Envelope

Place the inner envelope or the assembled invitation suite into the outer envelope, with the text facing up. The outer envelope includes the address, postage, and formal names of the guests.

Step 7: Seal the Envelope

Use an envelope moistener or bottled adhesive to seal the outer envelopes. Be careful not to use too much liquid, as it can cause the envelopes to become soggy and puckered. Place a heavy book on top of the sealed envelopes to ensure a secure seal.

Step 8: Add Return Address

Include address labels or rubber stamps with your return address on the envelope's back flap. You can also use calligraphy or print the addresses directly on the envelopes.

Step 9: Calculate Postage and Mail

Bring a fully assembled invitation to the post office to have it weighed, as wedding invitations with multiple enclosure cards may require more than a standard stamp. Purchase the correct amount of postage and mail your invitations. Consider requesting hand-canceling to prevent damage caused by sorting machines.

Frequently asked questions