Responding To A Wedding Invite: What To Say And Do

Being invited to a wedding is an honour, and it's important to respond promptly to the invitation to let the happy couple know whether you will be able to celebrate with them. It is courteous to check your schedule and confirm with any other guests included in your invitation before responding. The way you respond will depend on your relationship with the couple, the nature of the wedding, and the character of the invitation. For example, a formal wedding invitation will usually include an RSVP card and a pre-stamped envelope, whereas an informal invitation may be sent via WhatsApp. In both cases, it's important to respond enthusiastically and to include key information, such as whether you are bringing a plus one and any dietary restrictions.

Respond promptly

It is important to respond promptly to a wedding invitation, as this is a courteous thing to do for the couple. It is also a way to show appreciation for being invited. By responding quickly, you can let the couple know whether you will be celebrating with them and allow them to make any necessary adjustments to their plans. Here are some tips to ensure a prompt response:

Check Your Schedule

As soon as you receive the invitation, take note of the date and time of the wedding. Check your calendar or schedule to see if you have any prior commitments or events that may clash with the wedding. This will help you make an informed decision about your attendance.

Consult with Others

If you have been invited with a plus one or as part of a group, it is important to consult with those individuals and get their confirmation before responding. This ensures that everyone included in the invitation is on the same page and avoids any confusion or last-minute changes.

Respond as Soon as Possible

Don't delay in sending your response. The couple will appreciate a timely reply, as it helps them with their planning. If you are unable to attend, a prompt decline will give them the opportunity to invite someone else in your place if they wish. Responding promptly is considerate and respectful of the couple's time and efforts in organising their special day.

Choose an Appropriate Response Method

The method of response may depend on the nature of the invitation and your relationship with the couple. Formal invitations often include an RSVP card and a pre-stamped envelope for a written response. Informal invitations may be sent via email, text, or messaging apps, and a reply in the same format is usually acceptable.

Include Necessary Information

When responding, be sure to include all the necessary information. Indicate whether you will be attending, specify if you are bringing a plus one, and provide any other requested details such as meal choices or dietary restrictions. Don't forget to add a personal touch, such as a congratulatory note or well wishes for the couple.

Sample Responses

• "Dear [Couple's Names], we are so thrilled to receive your wedding invitation. We would be delighted to attend and celebrate your special day with you. Kind regards, [Your Names]."
• "Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! We are excited to be a part of your celebration and look forward to seeing you on [date]. Best wishes, [Your Names]."
• "Thank you for inviting us to your wedding. Unfortunately, we regret to inform you that we won't be able to attend due to prior commitments. We wish you both all the best. Sincerely, [Your Names]."

Check your schedule

When you receive a wedding invitation, it's important to check your schedule and confirm with any other guests included in the invitation whether you can attend. This is a courtesy to the couple, who are likely stressed from wedding planning. The sooner you can respond, the better, as this will allow them to make any necessary adjustments to their plans.

If you have been sent a formal wedding invitation, it will likely include an RSVP card and a pre-stamped envelope for you to send it back in. Fill out the card as soon as you receive it, providing all the necessary information, such as your full name, whether you are coming, and any dietary restrictions. You can also add a personal touch, such as a cute congratulatory note.

If you are unable to attend the wedding, it is still important to respond promptly. This will allow the couple to invite someone else in your place if they wish. You can politely decline the invitation by providing a brief reason for your absence and sending your well wishes. For example, you could say:

> "Thank you both so much for including us in your wedding. Sadly, we won't be able to attend, as we have prior commitments. We wish you all the best on your special day."

If you are able to attend, it is important to confirm your attendance as soon as possible. This will help the couple finalise details such as catering. You can confirm your attendance by responding to the invitation in a thoughtful and enthusiastic manner. For example:

> "Hi! We're so excited for your special day and we can't wait to celebrate with you. We'll definitely be there. See you soon!"

Consult with others on the invitation

When you receive a wedding invitation, it is important to respond promptly, and one of the first steps is to consult with anyone else who is included in the invitation. This could be your spouse, family members, or friends, and it is courteous to confirm with them whether they are able to attend before responding to the couple. This is especially important if you have been invited as a "plus one" of someone else—you wouldn't want to accept enthusiastically only to find out that the person who brought you is unable to make it.

If you are the one extending the invitation to a "plus one", it is important to confirm with them that they are happy for you to do so. It is also worth checking with them that they are aware of any expectations or responsibilities that may come with the invitation. For example, if the couple has requested that each guest gives a short speech, it is important that your guest is comfortable with this.

If you are inviting a group of people, such as your family, it is a good idea to check with each individual that they are able to attend before responding. This is especially important if the wedding has a strict guest list, and it prevents you from accepting on someone's behalf only to find out they are unable to make it. It is also courteous to the couple, as it prevents them from preparing for guests who will not be attending.

When consulting with others on the invitation, it is a good idea to be mindful of the nature of the wedding. For example, if it is a formal event, it may be more appropriate to invite a long-term partner rather than a casual date. Similarly, if the wedding is taking place overseas, it is worth checking that your guest is happy to travel and has the necessary documentation to do so.

Remember, it is important to respond to a wedding invitation promptly, so be sure to consult with others in a timely manner to avoid delaying your response.

Reply by post, email, or phone

Reply by Post

When replying by post, it is important to respond promptly. Check your schedule and consult with anyone else included in the invitation before responding. If you are unable to attend, a prompt response will give the couple time to invite someone else in your place.

Your response should be formal and brief. It should also be written in the third person. For example:

> Mr. and Mrs. Harold McGowan accept with pleasure (or regret that they are unable to accept) your kind invitation for Saturday, the nineteenth of June.

If you know the hosts well, a personal note is also appropriate. This should be brief but sincere. For example:

> Dear Ann and John, Rob and I are delighted to accept your invitation to attend Margaret and Tom’s wedding on June nineteenth. Yours sincerely, Brittany

Reply by Email

When replying by email, it is important to respond promptly and courteously, using appropriate spelling and grammar. Even if you are unable to attend, send a quick response. Your message should be concise, polite, and express gratitude. For example:

> Dear [Host],

> Thank you so much for the invitation. I would love to come to [name]'s wedding on [date].

> Best wishes,

> [Your name]

If you are unable to attend, you could say:

> I appreciate you inviting me to your wedding, and I am so sorry that I can’t be there to celebrate your big day. I have to be in Chicago on business, but you two will be first in my thoughts on your special day.

> Love to you both,

> [Your name]

Reply by Phone

If you are unable to attend after accepting the invitation, call the hosts immediately. It is courteous to let them know as soon as possible so that they can inform the caterers or invite someone else.

RSVP with a formal or informal tone

When responding to a wedding invitation, it is important to do so promptly and respectfully. Here are some examples of how to RSVP with a formal or informal tone:

Formal Tone

A formal RSVP response typically follows a set structure and uses formal language. Here is an example:

> Mr. and Mrs. Harold McGowan accept with pleasure your kind invitation for Saturday, the nineteenth of June. We are honoured to be a part of your special day and look forward to celebrating with you.

In this response, the guests have indicated their titles and last name, accepted the invitation politely, and expressed their well-wishes for the wedding.

If you need to decline the invitation, you can use similar wording:

> Mr. and Mrs. Harold McGowan regret that they are unable to accept your kind invitation for Saturday, the nineteenth of June. We wish you all the best on your special day and hope to celebrate with you in the future.

Informal Tone

An informal RSVP response can be more relaxed and personalised. Here is an example:

> Hi Ann and John, Rob and I are so excited to accept your invitation to Margaret and Tom's wedding on June 19th! It's going to be such a special day, and we can't wait to celebrate with you. See you soon!

In this response, the guests have used a friendly tone, expressed their excitement, and added a warm closing remark.

For an informal decline, you can still maintain a cheerful tone:

> Hi Ann and John, thank you so much for inviting Rob and me to Margaret and Tom's wedding. Unfortunately, we have a prior commitment and won't be able to make it. We're so sorry to miss it, and we send our love and congratulations to the happy couple!

General Tips

• Respond promptly and by the deadline indicated on the invitation.
• Always thank the hosts for the invitation, showing your appreciation for being included.
• If you are unable to attend, provide a brief explanation if possible, and send your well-wishes.
• Specify the number of guests you will bring, especially if you plan to bring a "+1".
• If you need to change or cancel your RSVP, do so as soon as possible to avoid inconveniencing the hosts.
• Consider including a small gift for the hosts to express your gratitude.

Frequently asked questions