Rhiannon Hendricks
A wedding is a joyous occasion, but it can also be an emotional time when you're missing a parent who has passed away. There are many ways to honour a deceased parent during your wedding, from adding a simple note in the program to creating a memorial table. Here are some ideas to consider when deciding how to include your deceased parent in your wedding program.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Where to place the deceased parent's name | Most people choose to place mentions of deceased relatives at the end of the program, to separate the melancholy portion from the celebratory section. |
| Format | Choose between a paragraph or a list. If choosing a list, divide it into two columns: one with names and one explaining their relationship to the couple. |
| How to list the deceased parent | List the living parent first, followed by the deceased parent. For example: "Parents of the Bride: Mr. and Mrs. John William Doe and the Late Mr. Roger Smith". |
| Honoring the deceased parent | Include a heartfelt message, such as "On this joyous day, we remember those who could not be with us". You can also include a recipe, light a candle, or reserve a seat for them. |
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What You'll Learn
Where to list the deceased parent in the program
There are several ways to list a deceased parent in a wedding program. Here are some options:
As Part of the Wedding Party
List the parents of the bride or groom, with the living parent's name first, followed by the deceased parent's name and "The Late" as a prefix. For example: "Parents of the Bride: Mr. and Mrs. John William Doe and the late Mr. Roger Smith". This option allows you to honour the deceased without adding an entire page to the program.
In a "Dedication" or "In Memoriam" Section
Create a dedicated section at the end of the program to list the deceased parent's name and include a short passage or heartfelt message. This option is suitable if you have multiple deceased relatives to honour.
In a Recipe Section
If your parent had a special recipe they loved to cook or bake, include it in your program with a message such as: "Although she cannot be here today, we honour the late [Name] by including her recipe in this program." This option allows you to share your parent's expertise and joy with your guests.
During the Ceremony or Reception
You can also choose to honour your deceased parent during the ceremony or reception, rather than in the printed program. For example, you can reserve a seat for them with a small sign or framed photograph, include a candle lighting in their honour, or lay a single flower from your bouquet on a chair. These options create a heartfelt way to preserve their presence during the wedding.
Ultimately, the decision on where to list a deceased parent in the program depends on personal preferences and the relationship with the departed. It is a personal choice and can be tailored to fit the specific circumstances and dynamics of the wedding.
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How to word the listing
There are several ways to word the listing of a deceased parent in a wedding program. Here are some options:
Listing the Deceased Parent in the Wedding Party Section
List the living parent first, followed by the deceased parent. For example:
Parents of the Bride: Mr. and Mrs. John William Doe and the Late Mr. Roger Smith
Creating a "Dedication" or "In Memoriam" Section
Create a separate section at the end of the program to honour the deceased parent. This can be titled "Dedication", "Thank You", or "In Memoriam". Here is an example:
"On this special day, we lovingly remember Mr. Roger Smith, Father of the Bride. Although he is not here with us, we know he is watching over us and celebrating this joyous occasion in spirit."
Including a Symbolic Quote or Tribute
Add a symbolic quote or a simple "In Loving Memory Of" tribute along with the rest of the ceremony details. Here is an example:
"In Loving Memory of Mr. Roger Smith, Father of the Bride. We are saddened by your absence on this cherished day, but we find peace in knowing that your love and guidance have helped us get to this moment."
Honouring the Deceased Parent with a Recipe
If the deceased parent had a special recipe, you can include it in the program with a heartfelt message:
"Although she cannot be with us today, we honour the late Isabella Perez by including her special donut recipe in this program. Please use it to spread love and joy in your own families, just as she did."
Holding a Candle Lighting or a Moment of Silence
Include your guests in honouring the deceased parent by holding a short candle lighting or a moment of silence during the ceremony. The wedding officiant can make a brief statement about the loved one before the lighting of the candle or the moment of silence.
Ultimately, the wording you choose should reflect your personal preferences and comfort level. You can decide how much or how little to include, depending on what feels right for you and your partner.
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Including a heartfelt message
There are many ways to include a heartfelt message honouring a deceased parent in a wedding program. Here are some ideas:
Symbolic Quotes or Tributes
Include a symbolic quote or a simple "In Loving Memory" tribute along with the rest of the ceremony details. For example, "On this special day in our lives, we lovingly remember [name of deceased parent], Father/Mother of the [bride/groom]." Alternatively, you could write a sentence or two, such as "We remember with love those who are no longer with us" or "We remember those who raised us, including [name of deceased parent]."
List of Names
Create a list of the deceased relatives you want to mention, usually limited to immediate family members such as parents, siblings, and possibly grandparents. Decide on a format, such as a paragraph or a two-column list with names and their relationship to the couple. This can be placed at the end of the program to separate the melancholy portion from the celebratory section.
Dedication
Include a dedication page at the end of the program with a heading such as "In Memory Of" or "We Remember." Here, you can list the names of the deceased parents and other family members.
Lighting a Candle
If there is a special portion of the ceremony dedicated to the deceased parent, such as lighting a candle, include this in the program with a note such as "Lighting of a candle in memory of [name of deceased parent], mother/father of the [bride/groom]."
Songs or Dances
Create a playlist of the deceased parent's favourite songs to be played during the reception. You can also choose a special song to be played during a dance or at a specific moment during the ceremony as a tribute.
Photos
Display photos of the deceased parent at the reception or incorporate them into your attire. For example, you could wear a locket with their photo or attach a photo charm to your bouquet.
Remember to personalise the tribute to reflect the relationship and the vibe of the deceased parent. It is also a good idea to consider the preferences of other family members and send a draft of the program to your closest living relatives for their approval.
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Honouring the deceased parent during the ceremony
Honouring a deceased parent during a wedding ceremony can be challenging, but it can also be a way to feel their presence on your special day. Here are some ideas to include a tribute to a deceased parent in your wedding program:
List the Deceased Parent in the Wedding Party Section
When listing the parents of the bride or groom, include your living parent first, followed by the deceased parent. For example, "Parents of the Bride: Mr. and Mrs. John William Doe and the Late Mr. Roger Smith". This simple approach honours the deceased without adding an entire page to the program.
Create a "Dedication" or "In Memoriam" Page
If you want to include a longer tribute or have multiple deceased relatives to honour, consider adding a "Dedication" or "In Memoriam" page at the end of the program. This page can include a symbolic quote, a heartfelt message, or a short passage about the deceased parent. For example, "On this joyous day, we remember those who could not be with us, especially my father, Mr. Roger Smith, whose love and guidance helped make this day possible."
Include a Recipe or Symbolic Item
If your parent had a special recipe they loved to cook or bake, include it in the program with a note such as, "Although she cannot be here today, we honour the late Isabella Perez by including her recipe. Please use it to spread love and joy in your own families." Alternatively, use a piece of fabric that reminds you of your loved one, such as a heart-shaped patch from the bride's father's shirt, or add a photo charm to your bouquet.
Hold a Candle Lighting or Moment of Silence
If you want to include your guests in honouring the deceased parent, hold a short candle lighting or a moment of silence during the ceremony. Ask your wedding officiant to include a brief statement about your loved one, and light a candle or pause for a moment of reflection to feel their presence.
Reserve a Special Place at the Ceremony or Reception
Honour your late loved one by reserving a front-row seat at the ceremony or a special table at the reception. You can use one of their jackets, place a bouquet of their favourite flowers on the chair, or frame photos of them to display. These simple gestures can make you feel like your deceased parent is included in the celebration.
Remember, the key is to choose a tribute that feels meaningful and comfortable for you. Whether it's a simple mention in the wedding party list or a more elaborate memorial, honouring a deceased parent during the ceremony can be a special way to remember and celebrate their love and impact on your life.
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Memorialising the deceased parent at the reception
Memorialising a deceased parent at a wedding reception is a thoughtful way to keep their memory alive and feel their presence on your special day. Here are some ideas to incorporate their memory into the reception:
Memorial Table
A memorial or memory table is a beautiful and meaningful way to honour your loved one. It serves as a space for you and your guests to reflect, reminisce and feel connected to your deceased parent. You can include framed photos, their name and dates of birth and passing, and even sentimental mementoes like their favourite piece of jewellery, a letter, or an object that holds special meaning. You could also feature framed quotes, such as a line from their favourite song, poetry, or a quote about love. If your parent loved to cook, you could include their special recipe along with a heartfelt message, such as, "Although she cannot be here today, we honour the late Isabella Perez by including her recipe in this program. Please use it to spread love and joy in your own families."
Reserved Seat
Honour your deceased parent with a reserved seat at the reception. You can decorate the chair with a piece of fabric that reminds you of them, such as a heart-shaped patch made from their clothing. You can also place a floral arrangement or a simple photo and candle on the chair.
Wedding Speech
Incorporate your parent's memory into your wedding speech through a prayer, a quote, or a memorial poem. You can share a brief toast to acknowledge all those who couldn't be with you or give an extended speech about your parent specifically. It's okay to lean into your emotions and acknowledge your loss—your guests will understand. If you need help finding the right words, your wedding officiant or planner can assist with choosing a symbolic reading or tribute.
Music
Play a special song at the reception as a sweet way to honour your parent. Pick a tune that holds meaning, like a song you always sang together or danced to. You can make the moment even more meaningful by incorporating a personal item, such as wearing a memento they gave you or carrying their cufflinks or handkerchief with your bouquet.
Memory Box
Set up a memory box at the reception, where guests can write down and share their favourite memories of your late parent. This can be a lovely way to involve your guests in honouring your loved one and create a collection of heartfelt messages to cherish.
Remember, there is no right or wrong way to memorialise a deceased parent at your wedding. Do what feels right and appropriate, whether it's a public tribute or a subtle, private acknowledgment. These suggestions can be adapted to fit your vision and comfort level, ensuring your parent's memory is honoured in a way that brings you comfort and joy.
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Frequently asked questions
You can include a simple message such as "On this joyous day, we remember those who could not be with us" or "We know you'd be here today if heaven wasn't so far away." You can also list the deceased parent as part of the wedding party, with a note such as "The Late Mr. Arthur Den."
The content can be determined by the relationship you had with your parent and how long you want the passage to be. You can include a heartfelt message, a recipe, a symbolic quote, or a simple "In Loving Memory Of" tribute.
Most people choose to place mentions of deceased relatives at the end of the program to separate the melancholy portion from the celebratory section. You can also include a dedication page at the end with a short passage about your parent.
