Planning A Wedding: Maid Of Honor's Guide To Success

Being a maid of honour is a big responsibility, and it's important to know what to expect. You'll be the bride's supportive soundboard and best friend, helping to maintain peace among the bridal party and offering a second opinion on the wedding dress. You'll also be in charge of planning the bridal shower and bachelorette party, and you may be asked to give a speech at the reception. To stay organised, it's a good idea to create a planning timeline with key milestones, deadlines, and tasks, and to enlist the help of other bridesmaids or close friends to share some of the responsibilities.

Planning the bridal shower and bachelorette party

As the maid of honour, you'll be in charge of planning the bridal shower and bachelorette party. First, reach out to family members and bridesmaids to get an idea of their budgets and availability. You can then start to plan the nitty-gritty details of the events, keeping everyone's budgets in mind.

You should also initiate a conversation with the bride to discuss how best to support her throughout the wedding planning process. Be open about personalities and decide if the bride will delegate tasks and ask for help, or if you should periodically check in and offer support without being prompted. Discuss the level of involvement and support upfront, and be mindful of relationships the bride may need to navigate with family.

You can also help the bride by addressing wedding invitations, making centrepieces or favours, and choosing her wedding dress. When booking or helping to book a bridal appointment, keep the guest list minimal. They don’t need to invite every aunt, cousin, and friend-of-a-friend.

Helping the bride choose her wedding dress

As the maid of honour, you'll be expected to help the bride choose her wedding dress. This is a big moment in the wedding-planning process, and the bride will be counting on you for a second opinion. When booking a bridal appointment, help the bride keep her guest list minimal. They don't need to invite every aunt, cousin and friend-of-a-friend.

On the day, you'll be expected to help the bride get into her dress, and add accessories like jewellery, a veil and shoes. You'll also be expected to pose for the bride's getting-dressed photos.

Before the wedding, you'll be in charge of maintaining peace among the bridal party, and answering any questions the bridesmaids may have. You'll also be expected to lead the charge when it comes to planning the bridal shower and bachelorette party.

Managing the bridal party's arrivals

As the maid of honour, you will be responsible for coordinating the bridal party's arrivals. This will involve arriving at the venue at a set time to get ready, and managing the bridesmaids' dress and hair and makeup appointments. You should also communicate with the bride about their on-site beauty items and help them get into their wedding dress.

Before the wedding, you should connect the bridal party by email or text so that everyone can get to know each other before the wedding activities begin. You should also be open about personalities and decide with the bride how much support she would like from you. For example, will she delegate tasks to you, or would she prefer you to check in and offer support without being prompted?

On the day, you will be in charge of maintaining peace among the bridal party and answering any questions they may have about the wedding-day itinerary. You should let everyone know that they can come to you with any questions, comments, or concerns, and only involve the bride if you don't have a solution to their requests.

Giving a speech at the reception

As the maid of honour, you'll likely be asked to give a speech at the reception. It's your job to not embarrass the couple, so make sure you start jotting down ideas months before the wedding. Spend a few weeks before the big day finessing your speech and putting everything together.

Your speech should be a celebration of the couple and their relationship. Start by introducing yourself and explaining your relationship with the couple, especially the bride. You could include a funny anecdote about the bride, but make sure it's appropriate and won't embarrass her.

Talk about the couple's relationship and what makes them perfect for each other. Share a story about how they met or a special moment they shared. You could also talk about the proposal and how happy the bride was when she told you about it.

Include some words of wisdom or advice for the couple. This could be about love, marriage, or simply navigating life together. You could also include a quote or two about love and marriage.

End your speech by wishing the couple a happy future together and proposing a toast to their happiness. Remember to keep your speech positive and light-hearted, and avoid any topics that might be controversial or embarrassing.

Planning a wedding craft night

On the night, make sure the bride's favourite bubbly is on hand, and you could even suggest a getting-ready checklist for the wedding day. This could include the time everyone will arrive at the venue to get ready, coordinating the bridal party's arrivals, and managing dress, hair and makeup appointments.

As the maid of honour, you can also use the craft night to connect with the other bridesmaids and family members. You can let them know that they can come to you with any questions, comments or concerns, and only involve the bride if you don't have a solution. You can also use the night to start planning the bridal shower and bachelorette party, keeping everyone's budgets in mind.

Frequently asked questions