Rhiannon Hendricks
Planning a wedding can be an expensive affair, with the average wedding in the US costing around $35,000. Traditionally, the bride's family foots most of the bill, but modern couples often adopt their own approach, with some paying for the wedding themselves. There is no one-size-fits-all solution, and various factors, such as location and guest count, can significantly impact the overall cost. To ensure a stress-free planning process, it is crucial for couples to have an open conversation about their budget, saving plans, and payment options early on.
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What You'll Learn
Traditionally, the bride's family pays for most things
Traditionally, the financial responsibility for a wedding fell mostly on the bride's family. This included the wedding planner, invitations, the bride's dress, the cake, the photographer, the venue, flowers, music, and the reception. The groom's family would cover the costs of the rehearsal dinner, the honeymoon, wedding day transportation, the officiant, and the marriage license. The groom would also pay for the bride's engagement and wedding rings, as well as gifts for the groomsmen. It was also common for the groom's family to pay for the alcohol at the reception.
In modern times, however, these traditions are not set in stone, and there is no official rule dictating how couples should divide wedding expenses. Couples may choose to pay for the wedding themselves, or both sets of families may split the costs evenly. Some couples may also prefer to contribute their own money to cover the costs. LGBTQ+ couples, in particular, may opt for alternatives to the traditional breakdown.
Regardless of who pays, it is essential to have budget conversations early on in the planning process. This involves estimating the total bill and understanding how much each party is willing and able to contribute. Couples can also consider setting up a cash registry, where guests can contribute money to help achieve financial goals, such as a honeymoon or a down payment on a house. However, this money may not be available until close to or on the wedding day, so it should not be relied upon to pay for wedding-related expenses.
The average wedding cost in the US is around $35,000, but this can vary widely depending on factors such as location and the number of guests. It is important to be mindful of this when creating a wedding budget and deciding how to allocate funds.
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Couples often pay for weddings themselves
While there is no right or wrong way to split wedding costs, it is becoming increasingly common for couples to pay for their weddings themselves. This is often because couples are getting married later in life and are therefore more financially independent. By paying for their weddings themselves, couples can claim their independence and invest more in the areas of their wedding that are most important to them.
If you are planning to pay for your wedding yourself, it is important to first create a budget and understand how much you can spend. Wedding costs can quickly add up, with venue and catering bills often amounting to more than expected. A budget will help you keep track of your spending and ensure you don't overspend. It is also important to start saving early, as you will likely need to pay for wedding-related products and services upfront.
There are many ways to save for a wedding, and financial experts can offer guidance in this area. Some strategies include sacrificing big things and saving on small things, or setting up a cash registry, where guests can contribute money to help you reach your financial goals. However, it is important to note that you shouldn't rely solely on cash gifts from guests, as you likely won't receive them until close to or on your wedding day.
When creating your budget, consider the various costs associated with weddings, such as the venue, catering, dress, invitations, cake, photographer, and music. You can also discuss with your family members whether they would like to contribute to the wedding financially. It is best to approach this topic delicately and emphasize that you are not expecting anything.
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Saving and budgeting are key
To save effectively, you can set up a separate high-yield savings account dedicated to your wedding fund. You can also benefit from rewards and cash backs by using a credit card for certain wedding expenses, but it is important to pay on time and avoid overspending to steer clear of penalties and debt. If you have a large budget goal, divide it into smaller, more manageable monthly chunks. For instance, if you are aiming to save $20,000 in a year, you would need to save about $1,700 each month.
Additionally, consider the timing of your wedding. Getting married during the off-season or "shoulder season" can save you thousands. Vendors often hike their prices during popular wedding seasons, so moving your wedding date by a week or two could result in significant savings. You can also cut costs by reducing your guest list, as some venues specialize in intimate weddings and offer more affordable packages.
Finally, remember that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to paying for a wedding. While traditionally, the bride's family covers most of the wedding expenses, modern couples often adopt their own approach based on their unique circumstances. Some couples split the costs with their families, contribute their own money, or pay for the wedding themselves.
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Wedding loans are an option
When considering a wedding loan, it's essential to shop around for the best interest rates and terms. Some lenders may offer discounts if you add a co-borrower to the loan, but be aware that some companies charge high origination fees and annual percentage rates (APRs). For example, Upstart charges an APR of up to 35.99% and doesn't allow for co-borrowers. On the other hand, LendingTree offers a discount on interest rates if you add a co-borrower and has a free mobile app to help you manage your loan.
To qualify for a wedding loan, you'll typically need to have a good credit score, a valid Visa or Mastercard credit card, and meet specific income requirements. Some lenders may also require you to have a U.S. address, a personal banking account, an email address, and a Social Security number. It's important to remember that wedding loans are unsecured, meaning you don't have to put up any collateral, but you'll still want to borrow wisely and only take on as much debt as you can comfortably repay.
While a wedding loan can help cover the cost of your big day, it's not the only option. Some couples choose to save up and pay for the wedding themselves, ensuring they start their married life with healthy finances. Others may rely on family contributions, following traditional customs where the bride's family pays for most expenses, or split the costs evenly between both families. Ultimately, there is no right or wrong way to fund your wedding, and you can choose the option that best suits your financial situation and relationship dynamics.
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Families may contribute or split costs
Traditionally, the bride's family is expected to cover most of the wedding expenses, including the wedding planner, invitations, dress, ceremony, reception, flowers, photography, music, and venue. The groom's family usually pays for the rehearsal dinner, alcohol at the reception, wedding day transportation, officiant fees, and the honeymoon. However, in modern times, there is no official rule dictating how couples should split wedding costs.
Today, there are three common scenarios for splitting wedding expenses: the couple's respective families evenly split the bill, both partners contribute their own money, or the couple pays for everything themselves. LGBTQ+ couples, in particular, often choose alternatives to the traditional breakdown as it may not reflect their unique relationship.
When deciding how to divide costs, it is essential to have open conversations about budget and priorities early in the planning process. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, and the distribution of funds should be tailored to each couple's circumstances and relationships with their families.
Couples can also consider other options to help with costs, such as setting up a cash registry for guests to contribute to honeymoon funds or savings for a house. Additionally, some couples may choose to allocate more money to specific aspects of the wedding that are important to them.
While there is no longer a standard approach to splitting wedding costs, it is crucial to navigate this topic with consideration and respect for all parties involved.
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Frequently asked questions
There is no right or wrong way to split wedding costs. Traditionally, the bride's family pays for most of the wedding, including the wedding planner, invitations, dress, ceremony, reception, flowers, photography, and music. The groom's family pays for the alcohol at the reception, the rehearsal dinner, honeymoon, wedding day transportation, and the officiant. Nowadays, it is common for couples to pay for their weddings themselves, or for both families to split the cost.
The first step is to have a conversation with your partner and your families about how much everyone is willing and able to contribute. Then, use a wedding budget tool to explore pricing in your area and see how much you should expect to spend based on your location, guest count, etc. You can also create an Excel document to keep track of your budget and when payments are due.
If you are paying for your wedding yourself, you can save by cutting down on small things like centrepieces or wedding party gifts. You can also save by making DIY decorations, and shopping around for the best prices on everything you need.
