Creating An Intimate Wedding: Tips For A Small, Cozy Affair

how to make intimate weddings

Planning a wedding can be stressful, especially when it comes to deciding on the guest list and choosing a venue. For couples who want a more intimate wedding, the idea of a big wedding can be unappealing, stressful, and expensive. A small wedding allows couples to focus on creating a unique and personalised experience, emphasising meaningful connections with their closest friends and family.

When planning an intimate wedding, it's essential to set expectations early and be intentional with the guest list. Consider creating a tiered list, starting with immediate family, followed by extended family and close friends, and finally, acquaintances. It's also important to set boundaries and be firm with your decisions, as you may encounter resistance or pressure to invite more guests.

For the venue, think outside the box and consider unconventional spaces such as restaurants, backyards, national parks, or even a friend's backyard. Be creative with your seating arrangements and embrace alternative options like hay bales or rug cushions.

By keeping the guest list small, couples can also splurge on details that will make their day memorable, such as personalised decorations, unique cocktails, or a live artist to capture the moment.

Intimate weddings offer a special opportunity to celebrate love in a meaningful and personalised way, allowing couples to focus on what truly matters to them.

Characteristics Values
Guest list Keep it small and intimate, with only close friends and family.
Venue Choose a unique, remote, or outdoor venue, such as a restaurant, backyard, national park, or beach.
Seating Use alternative seating arrangements, such as hay bales or bean bags.
Layout Experiment with different layouts, such as a U-shaped or curved seating arrangement.
Decorations Go bold with florals and other decorations, or opt for a more minimalist approach.
Food and drinks Serve simple food, such as pizza or a BBQ, or get creative with a themed menu or interactive drink display.
Entertainment Hire acoustic musicians, have lawn games, or create a bonfire for marshmallow roasting.
Photography Invest in a talented photographer to capture the intimate moments.
Guest involvement Include guests in the ceremony, e.g., by having them stand during the ceremony or participate in a ring warming.
Personal touches Add personalised touches, such as handwritten invitations or a dress code.

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Venue Options: From restaurants to backyards, national parks to beaches, there are many venue options for an intimate wedding

When it comes to venues for an intimate wedding, the world is your oyster. From restaurants to backyards, national parks to beaches, there are endless options to choose from. Here are some ideas to get you started:

Restaurants

Restaurants are a fantastic option for an intimate wedding, offering unique spaces with everything you need under one roof. Opt for a spot that you and your partner love, so you can share the ambiance and cuisine with your guests. Just be sure to choose a restaurant with decor that resonates with you, as they often have restrictions on decorations.

Backyards

For a cozy and low-maintenance setting, consider hosting your wedding in the backyard of your house, your childhood home, or a family member's property. This option allows you to create a sentimental and intimate atmosphere, and with a small guest list, everyone will fit comfortably. If your guest list is on the larger side, you may want to consider renting bathrooms.

Airbnb Venues

Private homes on the rental market, such as Airbnbs, can be a cost-efficient option for an intimate wedding. They offer flexibility to move between spaces and often provide a unique and memorable setting. However, be sure to check with the host beforehand, as some properties do not allow gatherings or weddings.

Small Spaces in Large Venues

If you're opting for a more traditional venue like a ballroom or industrial loft, consider utilizing smaller spaces within the venue. Think outside the box and explore areas like libraries, courtyards, theaters, or smaller galleries. These spaces are often overlooked but can be perfect for an intimate celebration.

National Parks and Beaches

For a truly unique and scenic option, consider exchanging your vows in nature. Whether it's a secluded beach or a picturesque national park, these venues offer a breathtaking backdrop for your special day. This option is especially well-suited for smaller weddings, as it creates an intimate atmosphere and ensures unobstructed views for all your guests.

Remember, when choosing a venue for your intimate wedding, don't be afraid to think outside the box. By selecting a venue that reflects your style and personality, you'll create a memorable and meaningful celebration for you and your guests.

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Guest List: Keep it small and meaningful, with only those closest to you

Keeping your guest list small and meaningful is a great way to ensure your wedding is intimate and special. Here are some tips to help you create a guest list that feels right for you:

Be Selective

When creating your guest list, be intentional and selective. Consider who you cannot imagine having your wedding day without. Just because you get on well with someone doesn't necessarily mean they are a must-have guest. Reflect on your relationships and think about who you absolutely want to witness this significant and personal moment.

Set Clear Criteria

To help you decide on your guest list, set clear criteria. For example, you could limit your guest list to immediate family and close friends only. Another approach is to only invite people who have played a direct role in your relationship, such as the person who set you up on a blind date or those who helped with your proposal.

Manage Family Dynamics

If you have a large family, managing expectations can be tricky. Be transparent about your plans for an intimate wedding early on, so that family members are aware they may not receive an invitation. This can help to avoid hurt feelings and manage any potential backlash. It's also a good idea to set boundaries and be firm with your decisions. Remember, your wedding is about celebrating your love and connection with your partner, so focus on creating a guest list that reflects that.

Consider a Child Policy

Decide whether you want children at your wedding. This can be a tricky area, especially if you have lots of nieces and nephews. Consider whether you want to include them in your small wedding or not, and be consistent with your approach to avoid any family politics.

Include the Uninvited

If you feel guilty about not inviting certain people, there are ways to include them after the event. You could host a backyard barbecue or send wedding announcements with a link to an online gallery of images. Alternatively, you could livestream the ceremony or record a video to share later.

Be Prepared for Pushback

Not everyone will understand your decision to have an intimate wedding. Some people may question your choices or try to persuade you to expand your guest list. Stay firm and remind yourself that their persistence is about them, not you. Be honest and explain that you are keeping the wedding small, and you would love to celebrate with them at another time.

Creating a small guest list for your intimate wedding can be challenging, but it's important to remember that this is your day. By being selective and setting clear criteria, you can ensure that your wedding is filled with people who are closest to you and who will make the day even more meaningful.

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Budget: With fewer guests, you can splurge on details like decor or a live band

Budget: Splurging on Decor and a Live Band

With a smaller guest list, you can allocate more of your budget to decor and entertainment, creating a memorable experience for your guests. Here are some ideas to help you splurge on these details while still keeping the intimate feel of your wedding:

Decor

  • Opt for a statement overhead installation at the reception, such as a string light backdrop or hanging floral arrangements.
  • Create a luxurious tablescape with items like silk napkins, crystal glassware, and vintage china. You can also use table linens to create a cozier, more anchored feel.
  • Invest in custom stationery, such as handwritten invitations and place cards with calligraphy.
  • Enhance the ambiance with innovative lighting, such as a canopy of string lights over a banquet table or fairy lights behind the altar or head table.
  • Choose unique table linens, colorful candles, or a floral arch at the venue entrance to make a lasting impression.
  • Incorporate family heirlooms, such as antique candelabras or vintage china, to add a sentimental touch.
  • Design elaborate escort card displays with handwritten touches or items that double as favors, like engraved objects with your initials and wedding date.
  • Opt for an abundance of low, ultra-lush floral arrangements paired with candles for a vibrant and intimate atmosphere.

Live Band

  • When choosing a live band, consider the number of band members relative to your guest count. A smaller group of musicians will create a more intimate feel without overpowering your guests.
  • Look for bands that can provide a range of services, such as background music during cocktails or a DJ set during breaks to keep the energy going.
  • If your venue has space constraints, consider an acoustic duo with a loop pedal or a solo singer with backing tracks to create a full sound without taking up too much space.
  • To keep the focus on your guests and avoid a rave-like atmosphere, opt for a smaller band that can still facilitate special dances without a crowded stage.
  • Prioritize bands that allow you to customize their performance to match your wedding theme, such as including a illustration on their bar sign or learning a special song for your first dance.
  • If you're open to a unique twist, consider a roaming band that can mingle with your guests and create a lively atmosphere without being confined to a stage.

By splurging on these details, you can elevate your intimate wedding and create lasting memories for you and your guests.

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Food & Drink: Get creative with food and drink options, from potlucks to personalised cocktails

Food and drink are integral parts of any wedding, and with a smaller guest list, you have more freedom to get creative with your menu and presentation. Here are some ideas to make your intimate wedding a delicious and memorable experience:

Potlucks and Personalised Menus

If you're planning a more casual affair, a potluck-style dinner can be a fun and interactive way to involve your guests. Ask each guest to bring a dish that holds a special meaning for them, or that represents their cultural heritage. This approach adds a personal touch and creates a diverse and exciting spread.

On the other hand, if you want to treat your guests to a special meal, consider creating a personalised menu that reflects your favourite foods and flavours. This could be a recreation of your first date dinner, a selection of dishes from your favourite restaurant, or a custom ramen bar. Involve your caterers to help you design a menu that will wow your guests.

Interactive Food Stations and Displays

Interactive food stations and displays are a great way to engage your guests and offer a variety of options. Here are some ideas to get you started:

  • Charcuterie cones: Offer pre-made cones filled with meats, cheeses, crackers, and fruits.
  • Oyster shucking: Have travelling seafood servers shuck oysters for your guests during cocktail hour.
  • Cheese station: A cheese lover's dream! Offer a variety of cheeses, crackers, breads, fruits, and accompaniments.
  • Antipasti spread: Olives, bread, dipping sauces, sliced meats, and cheeses will kickstart the cocktail hour in style.
  • Taco bar: Set up a build-your-own taco bar with classic toppings and unique additions like mushrooms and mango.
  • Bagel bar: From lox to peanut butter, your guests can create their perfect bagel combination.
  • Waffle bar: Waffles are versatile! Offer both sweet and savoury toppings to cater to all tastes.
  • Pizza: Create a pizza pie celebration with classic and vegan options.
  • Ice cream sundae bar: Let your guests build their own ice cream sundaes with fun toppings.

Signature Cocktails and Creative Drinks

Add a unique twist to your wedding with signature cocktails or creative drink options. Here are some ideas to inspire you:

  • Personalise your drinks: Name your cocktails after your pets, last name, hometown sports team, or wedding theme. You can even add illustrations to your bar sign.
  • Interactive cocktail moment: Wow your guests with an interactive cocktail display, like a bartender smoking glasses over an open flame.
  • Spritz: Bartenders say the spritz is the signature wedding cocktail of Summer 2024.
  • Gin-based cocktails: If you're looking for a classic with a twist, try a signature cocktail made with gin.
  • Mocktails: If you're hosting a sober wedding, create a fun and delicious mocktail menu for your guests.
  • Coffee bar: Set up an interactive Turkish coffee station, or complement your dessert station with a coffee bar.
  • Drunken charcuterie: This unique concept involves dipping cheese in liquor and spices before pairing it with cured meats.

With a smaller guest list, you have the opportunity to be more adventurous and intimate with your food and drink choices. Whether it's a potluck or a personalised five-course meal, your guests are sure to appreciate the thought and creativity that goes into your special day.

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Activities: From games to bonfires, there are many ways to keep guests entertained

Activities are a great way to keep guests entertained and create a memorable wedding experience. From games to bonfires, there are numerous options to choose from, especially for intimate weddings. Here are some ideas to consider:

Outdoor Activities

If your wedding venue has a lawn or outdoor space, consider setting up some lawn games for your guests to enjoy. Some popular options include:

  • Corn hole
  • Croquet
  • Badminton
  • Bocce ball
  • Giant Jenga
  • Ring toss
  • Horseshoes
  • Outdoor scavenger hunt

For a more relaxed and intimate setting, you could also have a bonfire. This creates a cosy atmosphere, especially for evening gatherings. Provide ingredients for s'mores, and perhaps some instruments for a sing-along.

Indoor Activities

For indoor weddings, there are plenty of options to keep guests entertained:

  • Board games
  • Video games
  • Drinking games
  • Karaoke
  • Temporary tattoo station
  • Tarot card reader
  • Live painter
  • Photo booth
  • Dance-off
  • Celebrity impersonator
  • Magician
  • Caricaturist

Interactive Activities

Encourage your guests to interact and socialise with each other through activities such as:

  • The Shoe Game: A game where the newlyweds answer questions by holding up their own shoe or their partner's shoe.
  • Custom wheel of activities: Create a wheel with various activities, such as "Pick a Couple to Kiss" or "Show Us Your Best Dance Moves".
  • Themed photo booth: Encourage guests to dress up and take fun photos.
  • Snapchat geofilter: Create a custom geofilter for your wedding reception, allowing guests to snap and share memories.
  • Poker station: Set up a poker table and hire a dealer for the night.
  • Dart art station: Set up a canvas with paint-filled water balloons, and let guests throw darts to create a unique art piece.

Kid-Friendly Activities

If children are attending your wedding, here are some ideas to keep them entertained:

  • Coloring station: Provide coloring books and crayons, or cover a table with butcher paper for them to draw on.
  • Lego centerpieces: Have Lego sets as centerpieces that kids can play with.
  • Giant tic-tac-toe: A simple yet fun twist on the classic game.
  • Outdoor games: Set up a play area with hula hoops, jump ropes, and hopscotch.
  • Piñata: Get a themed piñata, such as a wedding cake or heart shape, for the kids to take turns hitting.

Frequently asked questions

A small wedding typically consists of 50 people or fewer, with the guest list ranging from 10 to 40 guests. However, the definition of a small wedding ultimately depends on the couple's preferences.

Include your closest family members, such as parents, grandparents, and siblings, along with your nearest friends. You can also extend the invitation to other significant people you can't imagine not having at your wedding.

With a limited guest list, you have more venue options. Consider non-traditional venues like a lakeside ceremony followed by a reception at a restaurant. You can also look for smaller spaces within larger venues, such as a library in a historic estate or a courtyard.

With a smaller guest list, you can allocate more of your budget to upgrading décor, food, and other details that reflect your and your partner's personalities. Consider unique touches like personalised favours, handwritten notes for each guest, or Lego buttonholes.

Here are some unique ideas:

- Go remote or choose a city venue that's easier to manage with a smaller group.

- Use alternative seating, like hay bales or rug cushions, for your ceremony.

- Change up the traditional ceremony layout with curved rows surrounding the altar.

- Involve your pets or other animals in the celebration.

- Create a personalised cocktail station or pimp-your-drink experience for guests.

- Sneak away for a private picnic with your partner during the celebration.

- Make your entrance or exit memorable, like hiring a bagpiper to walk you in.

- Elongate your wedding meal by incorporating a tasting menu for your guests.

- Scent your venue with candles to create a romantic and memorable ambiance.

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