Attending An Indian Wedding: Getting An Invite

Indian weddings are known for their vibrant colours, delicious food, and intricate rituals. They are steeped in rich tradition, with many customs and practices that have been passed down for generations. Attending an Indian wedding is an exciting and joyful experience, but it can also be overwhelming for first-timers. If you're wondering how to get invited to one, it's likely that you already know someone who is Indian and you could express your interest in attending an Indian wedding to them. However, keep in mind that Indian weddings are usually intimate affairs with a limited guest list, so there is no guarantee that you will receive an invitation.

Dressing appropriately: Wear modest, bright, colourful attire, avoiding black and white and red

If you've been invited to an Indian wedding, you're in for a treat! These celebrations are known for their extravagance and rich traditions. As a guest, you'll get to immerse yourself in the culture, and choosing what to wear is an important part of this. Here are some tips for dressing appropriately and making the most of this special occasion:

Avoid Black, White, and Red

It is considered inappropriate to wear black, white, or red to an Indian wedding. White is associated with mourning, black is considered inauspicious, and red is the colour traditionally worn by the bride. It is also important to avoid matching the bridal party, so if you know the colours they will be wearing, steer clear of those too.

Wear Modest, Colourful Attire

Indian weddings are known for their vibrant colours, so feel free to embrace bright, festive hues. "The most essential part of the dress code for an Indian wedding is to definitely wear colour," says Shawna Gohel, editor-in-chief of Maharani Weddings. "Bright, festive colour is always in style for an Indian wedding no matter what the season or venue."

You can opt for colourful outfits that you would typically wear to a Western wedding, or you can embrace the opportunity to wear traditional Indian clothing. Lehengas and sarees are common choices for women, while men often wear sherwanis or kurtas. If you're unsure about what to wear, don't be afraid to ask someone in the bridal party for advice.

Dress for the Occasion

Indian weddings often include multiple events across several days, and each event may have its own dress code. For example, the Mehendi ceremony is usually held during the day, so bright colours are often suggested, with a theme of green to match the colour of the henna. The Sangeet is a more formal, dance-centric event, so women typically wear Indian occasionwear, and men wear suits or tuxedos.

For religious ceremonies, it is important to dress modestly and conservatively, especially if the ceremony is taking place in a temple or mosque. Some ceremonies may require covered shoulders or heads, so it's a good idea to research the specific traditions of the wedding you're attending.

Accessorise Appropriately

When it comes to accessories, Indian weddings are a great opportunity to embrace bold, statement pieces. Large earrings, necklaces, and bangles are all great choices. Gold tones are often recommended, and you can add a fun, cultural touch with an Indian bag, such as a pouch or a small basket. For shoes, comfort is key since you'll likely be doing a lot of walking and dancing. Wedges or comfortable heels are a great choice.

Renting vs Buying

Finally, if you're considering wearing traditional Indian clothing, you may want to look into renting your outfit. There are rental services that allow you to borrow authentic Indian ensembles, which can be a more cost-effective and environmentally-friendly option than buying a new outfit.

Remember, Indian weddings are a celebration, so have fun with your fashion choices and be respectful of the culture and traditions. Enjoy the experience and make memories to cherish!

Gifts: Money in an envelope is traditional, with an amount ending in 1

If you've been lucky enough to receive an invitation to an Indian wedding, you're in for a treat! These weddings are steeped in rich tradition and culture, and you can expect a vibrant, colourful, and joyous celebration.

Now, when it comes to gifts, money in an envelope is a common and traditional choice. This practice is known as Sagan or Shagun in Northern Indian cultures and is highly regarded. The envelope, known as a "Paiso Ka Lifafa", is usually customised or ornate. It is believed that giving money is a symbol of good fortune and blessings for the couple in Indian culture.

The amount of money given varies and is a personal decision for each guest. However, there is one important thing to keep in mind: in Indian culture, gift amounts typically end with a "1". So, instead of nice round numbers like $50, $70, or $100, you would give $51, $71, or $101. The extra $1 is a way of wishing the couple prosperity and the start of accumulating their next $50 or $100. It's a unique and meaningful way of blessing the newlyweds.

The amount you choose to give can also depend on your relationship with the couple and the dynamics of the wedding. For example, if the couple is covering your stay and food, you might consider a higher amount to cover those expenses and offer a thoughtful gift.

Remember, the gift of money is just one way to celebrate the couple. Your presence, participation, and well-wishes are also invaluable parts of the celebration. So, enjoy the festivities, immerse yourself in the culture, and congratulate the happy couple!

Traditions: Learn the customs and rituals, like the Mehndi ceremony

Indian weddings are known for their vibrant colours, lavish festivities, and deep-rooted traditions. One of the most important aspects of an Indian wedding is its customs and rituals, which vary depending on the region and religion of the couple. As a guest, understanding these traditions is crucial to showing your respect and fully immersing yourself in the celebration.

One of the most popular and recognisable traditions is the Mehndi ceremony. This ritual is usually held one or two days before the wedding and involves applying henna paste to the hands and feet of the bride and sometimes the groom. The intricate designs, often featuring symbolic elements, are believed to bring good luck and fortune to the couple. As a guest, you may be invited to join in the festivities and have your own Mehndi design applied. It's considered a blessing to have dark Mehndi stains, so be sure to carefully follow the artist's instructions for achieving this.

Another important tradition is the exchange of wedding garlands, known as jaimala. This ritual takes place during the wedding ceremony and symbolizes the couple's acceptance of each other and their commitment to the marriage. The bride and groom exchange floral garlands, typically made of fresh flowers, three times, representing their love, respect, and honour for each other. As a guest, you may witness this ritual and the accompanying festivities, which often include lively music and dancing.

Indian weddings often include a ritual called the Haldi ceremony, which usually takes place the morning of the wedding. This ritual involves applying a paste made of turmeric, oil, and water to the bride and groom's skin. Turmeric is considered a sacred herb in Indian culture and is believed to purify and bless the couple before their marriage. The ceremony is often filled with laughter and playful teasing as family and friends lovingly apply the paste to the couple. As a guest, you may be invited to participate in this ritual, applying a small amount of the paste to the couple or offering your blessings.

The wedding ceremony itself is filled with meaningful rituals. One of the most important moments is the Saat Phere, or the seven steps, where the bride and groom circumambulate a sacred fire seven times, each step representing a specific vow they make to each other. These vows include promises to care for each other, to remain lifelong partners, and to support each other's families. Guests witness this sacred ritual, which is considered the heart of the wedding ceremony.

Lastly, it's important to familiarise yourself with the dress code expectations for Indian weddings, which are often elaborate and colourful. As a guest, you may be expected to wear traditional Indian attire or at least incorporate vibrant colours and intricate details into your outfit. Understanding these traditions and rituals will not only enhance your experience but also demonstrate your respect for the couple and their cultural heritage.

Food: Eat what you're given and don't criticise the food

Indian weddings are known for their delicious food, and it's important to come to the celebration with an open mind and an empty stomach! Here are some tips to keep in mind when it comes to the food at an Indian wedding:

Be prepared for a feast: Indian weddings are known for their hospitality and generous spreads of food. The meals are meticulously planned, reflecting the rich and diverse nature of Indian cuisine. Expect a variety of flavours, colours, and textures that will tantalize your taste buds.

Embrace the unknown: Indian weddings usually offer a buffet-style dinner with a wide array of options. Be adventurous and open to trying new dishes. You might be surprised by how much you enjoy the unfamiliar flavours and spices.

Respect the cultural norms: Indian food is often spicy, and vegan or gluten-free options are less common. Respect the cultural norms and traditions of the wedding and avoid criticising the food. If you have strict dietary restrictions, it's a good idea to plan your meals in advance.

Enjoy the experience: Eating at an Indian wedding is not just about satisfying hunger; it's an integral part of the celebration. Savour the flavours, indulge in the richness of the dishes, and appreciate the effort that has gone into preparing the feast. Remember that food plays a pivotal role in Indian culture and is an expression of hospitality.

Show your appreciation: Don't forget to express your gratitude to the hosts for the wonderful spread. Complimenting the food and showing your enjoyment is a great way to connect with the couple and their families. Your appreciation will surely be well-received and make the celebration even more memorable.

Guest etiquette: Don't bring uninvited +1s and don't overdo photos

Indian weddings are a vibrant and colourful affair, steeped in rich tradition and rituals. If you've been lucky enough to receive an invitation, there are some important guest etiquette points to keep in mind.

Don't Bring Uninvited +1s

It is considered rude to bring an uninvited guest to an Indian wedding. The hosts have likely put in a lot of effort and planning, and bringing an unexpected guest can put them in a challenging position. So, unless your invitation explicitly states that you can bring a plus-one, it is best to attend solo.

Don't Overdo Photos

While you may want to capture every moment of the beautiful ceremony, it is important to be mindful of when to put your camera away. The flashing and clicking of cameras can be disruptive and take away from the sanctity of the religious rites. During the more solemn parts of the ceremony, refrain from taking photos, and always look around to see if others are taking photos before you do.

Indian weddings are a unique and wonderful experience, but it is crucial to be mindful of the traditions and customs. By following these simple etiquette tips, you can ensure you are a respectful and considerate guest.

Frequently asked questions