Rsvp Etiquette: Inviting Guests To Your Wedding

Wedding RSVPs can be a confusing affair for guests, especially with the variety of response methods available today. From printed cards to online websites and emails, it's important to follow the couple's instructions to ensure your seat at the wedding. Here's a quick guide to help you navigate the wedding RSVP process and be a thoughtful guest.

Firstly, respond as soon as possible. Wedding planning is a complex task, and your timely response helps the couple finalise their catering count, create a seating chart, and manage their guest list. Even if you can't attend, it's polite to decline the invitation formally and send your regrets.

When filling out the RSVP, always include your full name and the total number of guests attending. If there is a esordio M, follow it with your proper title (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) and your full name. Indicate your response clearly by writing out the number of guests attending or not attending, instead of using checkmarks. If you have been offered a plus-one, provide the full name of your guest.

Some couples may request additional information, such as entrée selection or dietary restrictions. Be sure to provide this information accurately so the couple can accommodate your choices or restrictions. You may also include a short personal note or well wishes for the couple.

Lastly, use the provided stamped envelope if a paper response card is included. Respect the RSVP deadline, and if you need to cancel after accepting, inform the couple as soon as possible. Remember, wedding planning is a challenging task, and your timely and thoughtful response will be greatly appreciated!

What does RSVP stand for?

The acronym RSVP stands for the French phrase "répondez, s'il vous plaît", which translates literally to "respond if you please". When you receive a wedding invitation, the small RSVP card included in the envelope is one of the most important pieces of stationery in the suite. It is the key to the couple's wedding planning process, helping them to nail down their number of attendees, confirm an accurate headcount for their caterer, and make sure their guest count aligns with their original plans.

RSVP cards are usually sent out along with the official wedding invitation, six to eight weeks before the wedding. The deadline for responses is typically two to three weeks before the wedding, giving the couple enough time to provide final headcounts to vendors. It is important to respond to the RSVP as soon as possible and to follow the couple's instructions to ensure your seat at the wedding.

The RSVP card will often include the following:

• A place for your name(s)
• A place to check off or write your response (whether you are attending or not)
• A place to choose your meal (if applicable)
• A place to provide the total number of guests attending
• A place to answer a fun question from the couple
• A place to share a note with the couple

When filling out the name line, it is important to use your full name and the correct title (Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss). If you have been invited with a plus-one, include their full name as well.

When to send out wedding RSVP cards

Timing is Key

It is customary to send out wedding invitations six to eight weeks before the wedding date. This gives guests enough time to clear their schedules and make travel arrangements if needed. Therefore, the best time to send out your RSVP cards is when you send out your wedding invitations. Assemble them together and mail them out simultaneously. This ensures guests receive all the necessary information in one go and can plan accordingly.

Setting a Deadline

It is essential to set an RSVP deadline for your guests, usually about two to four weeks before the wedding. This allows you, your vendors, and your caterers enough time to finalise details such as the seating chart and food requirements. It is a good idea to feature this deadline prominently on the RSVP card, making it clear and hard to miss.

Reminders are Helpful

Even with a deadline, some guests may forget to respond. It is a good idea to send out reminders about a week before your RSVP deadline. You can do this in person, over the phone, or online. A gentle reminder will help ensure you receive responses from all your guests and finalise your plans.

Early Responses are Encouraged

Encourage your guests to respond to your RSVP as soon as possible. This helps you get a head start on your planning and makes it easier to chase up any missing responses closer to the deadline. It is considerate for guests to respond promptly, and it also shows their enthusiasm for your big day.

Late Responses

Sometimes, guests may miss the RSVP deadline. If you have guests who plan on attending but missed the deadline, instruct them to send the card back and also call you personally. This way, you can confirm their attendance and make the necessary adjustments to your plans. It is proper etiquette for guests to connect and confirm in this situation.

No Response

If you have guests who have not responded at all, it is advisable to wait about a week after the RSVP deadline before contacting them for a response. Most people are enthusiastic about your wedding but may simply forget to respond. A friendly call or message will help you get an accurate headcount and keep everyone happy.

Digital RSVPs

Many couples now opt for digital RSVPs through their wedding website or via email. It is still important to set a deadline for these responses and send out reminders. Digital RSVPs can make it easier for guests to respond promptly, but it is always a good idea to offer a paper RSVP option for less tech-savvy guests.

In conclusion, sending out your wedding RSVP cards alongside your invitations, setting clear deadlines, and sending friendly reminders will help ensure a smooth planning process for your special day.

What to include on a wedding RSVP card

Wedding RSVP cards are an important part of the wedding invitation suite. They give your guests a first taste of your wedding theme and allow you to gather essential information for your wedding planning. Here is what to include on a wedding RSVP card:

A Clear RSVP Deadline

It is important to give your guests a deadline for their response, usually about one month before the wedding date. This will help you finalise the details of your wedding, such as the number of meals required and seating arrangements. The deadline can be indicated with formal wording such as "The favour of a reply is requested by" or more casual phrasing like "Please respond by".

Space for Guest Names

Traditionally, this is a long blank line that begins with a printed "M", where guests will write their names and titles (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss). A more modern alternative is to simply print "Name:" before the blank line. This information will be useful for creating a final guest list and place cards.

Accept or Decline Options

The primary purpose of an RSVP card is to find out who will be attending the wedding. You can include checkboxes, circles, or fill-in-the-blank lines for guests to indicate their response. To prevent guests from adding extra names, you can indicate the exact number of guests invited, for example, "_ out of _ attending".

Dietary Requirements

If you are serving a sit-down dinner, it is helpful to include a section for guests to indicate their meal preferences, especially if you are offering multiple entrée options. It is also a good idea to include a line for guests to mention any food allergies or dietary restrictions, which can be crucial for the venue's chef to accommodate.

Additional Information

You can include other details on the RSVP card, such as the dress code, your contact information, or a reminder of your wedding website URL. You may also want to leave some blank space for guests to share their excitement or any special accommodation requests.

Creative Touches

While the above information is essential, you can also add creative and unique touches to your RSVP cards. For example, you can ask guests for song requests, date ideas, or advice for the newlyweds. This is a great way to inject your personality and wedding theme into the cards and make them more engaging for your guests.

How to address wedding RSVP cards

The RSVP card is an important part of your wedding stationery suite. It is a way for your guests to reply to your wedding invitation and it helps you to keep track of your headcount and your guests' dietary needs. Here are some tips on how to address wedding RSVP cards:

Set a Clear Deadline

It is recommended that you set an RSVP deadline that is around four weeks before your wedding date. This will give you and your vendors enough time to finalise any last-minute details that depend on the total guest count, such as the amount of food and drinks needed and the seating chart.

Include the Essentials

The card itself should include:

• A clear RSVP deadline
• A way for guests to indicate whether they will be attending or not
• Space for guests to enter their names and any plus-ones
• Any dietary requirements or meal choices, if applicable

Add Extra Information

You may also want to include:

• Your contact details
• The dress code
• A song request or advice for the newlyweds

Be Creative

Your RSVP cards are a great way to inject your personality and style and embrace your wedding theme or aesthetic. You can be as creative as you like with the wording, as long as it matches the tone and style of your wedding invitation in terms of spelling and grammar.

Provide Options for Responding

It is a good idea to provide your guests with options for responding to your wedding invitation, such as by mail, email, or through a wedding website. This will ensure that guests of all ages and comfort levels with technology are able to respond easily.

The RSVP Envelope

The response card envelope should be addressed to the person in charge of the guest list, whether that is you, your family member, or your wedding planner. Don't forget to include a stamp in the envelope!

What to do if you can't attend a wedding after RSVPing yes

When it comes to wedding RSVP invitations, it's important to understand the proper etiquette to avoid any mishaps. Here are some guidelines on what to do if you can't attend a wedding after RSVPing yes:

• Inform the Couple as Soon as Possible: It is essential to let the couple know about your change of plans as soon as possible. This is because an accurate headcount is crucial for various wedding arrangements, such as catering and seating. The sooner you inform them, the easier it will be for them to make alternative arrangements.
• Provide a Legitimate Reason: Ensure that your reason for cancelling is valid and unavoidable. Circumstances such as illness, family emergencies, or unexpected travel constraints are generally considered acceptable reasons for not attending. Be respectful and refrain from cancelling due to less compelling reasons, such as attending another event or not knowing anyone at the wedding.
• Suggest a Meaningful Alternative: Although your presence is valuable, you can suggest a meaningful alternative to show your support. Offer to take the couple out for a celebratory dinner after the wedding or send them a thoughtful gift. This gesture will convey your well-wishes and commitment to their special day.
• Contact the Right People: If you need to cancel at the last minute, it is advisable to reach out to someone close to the bride or groom, such as a family member or a member of the wedding party. They can help convey the message and make any necessary adjustments without burdening the couple on their big day.
• Follow Up with a Personal Note: After informing the couple or their representatives about your absence, it is considerate to follow up with a heartfelt note or phone call. Express your apologies and avoid providing a lengthy list of excuses. This will allow you to maintain a positive relationship with the couple and show that you value their special occasion.

Remember, while it is understandable to feel bad about cancelling, unexpected circumstances can arise. By handling the situation respectfully and promptly, the couple is more likely to understand and appreciate your honesty.

Frequently asked questions