Junior Rasmussen
Music is an integral part of any wedding, and the songs chosen for your big day can have a significant impact on the overall vibe and your guests' experience. Whether you opt for a band or a DJ, selecting the right songs for your wedding can be a daunting task. From the first dance as newlyweds to the father-daughter and mother-son dances, each song should be thoughtfully chosen to reflect your relationship and create lasting memories. In addition to these special dances, the music played throughout the reception should be carefully curated to keep your guests entertained and engaged. Striking a balance between high-energy and slower songs is essential to keeping your guests on the dance floor without burning them out.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Number of songs | 150 songs is a good number to aim for |
| Song choice | Choose songs that are meaningful to you and your partner, and that you both enjoy |
| Variety | Include a mix of genres and song tempos to keep guests engaged |
| Song dedications | Song dedications to family members and friends can be a nice touch |
| First dance | Choose a song that reflects your relationship and joy |
| Last dance | Choose a celebratory song to end the night on a high |
| Band vs. DJ | A band can be more expensive but provides a focal point, whereas a DJ plays songs as you'd hear them on the radio |
| Dance floor fillers | Motown, funk, and Beyoncé are sure to get people dancing |
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What You'll Learn
Choosing a band or DJ
When it comes to choosing between a band and a DJ for your wedding, there are several factors to consider. One of the most important considerations is your budget. Generally, DJs are a more affordable option than live bands. The cost of a DJ can vary, but on average, they are significantly cheaper than hiring a band. For example, in 2022, the average cost of a live band was $3,900, while a wedding DJ cost $1,500.
Location is another factor that can drive the price up. In some markets, a DJ can cost around $3,000, while a 10-plus piece band can range from $12,000 to $20,000. In New Orleans, a good DJ can cost between $10,000 and $15,000, and a great band can cost between $40,000 and $50,000. If you have a varied music taste, a DJ may be a better option, as they can play a wider range of music and cater to a diverse crowd.
If you're looking for a unique and eclectic atmosphere, a live band can offer something different from pre-recorded songs. Live bands can bring extra charm and energy to your wedding, and there's something thrilling about watching musicians perform live. However, if you want to hear songs exactly as you remember them, a DJ is the way to go. They can also easily accommodate requests and remix songs to make them more relaxed or up-tempo.
Before making a decision, it's important to consider the acoustics of your venue. Reception venues with a lot of windows, mirrors, high ceilings, and smooth flooring can cause an echo-chamber effect. Venues with a mix of heavy curtains, wood floors, and carpet typically have better acoustics for live music.
Ultimately, the choice between a band and a DJ depends on your personal preferences and budget. You can also combine the two by having a DJ play during the band's breaks or for a wedding after-party.
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Selecting the first dance song
First, think about the kind of moment you want to create. Do you want to stick with a traditional, romantic, slow first dance, or would you rather surprise your guests with an upbeat tune? You could also pair two songs together, with a slow song transitioning to an up-tempo bop to get your guests energised and eager to join you on the dance floor.
Next, consider the length of the song. A song that is too long may bore your guests, but you don't want it to be too short either, as you'll want to give your photographer enough time to capture this special moment. The ideal length for a first dance song is around three minutes, but it should be longer than a minute and less than four.
The tempo of the song is another important factor. If you want to choreograph your first dance, you might want to choose a song with a faster tempo. However, keep in mind that a very slow number may cause your guests to get antsy. Consider choosing a song with a tempo that is somewhere in between, or opt for a classic first dance style like "The Sway", the Waltz, or the Foxtrot.
The lyrics of the song should also be considered carefully. Choose a song with lyrics that resonate with you as a couple and convey the love and commitment you share. Make sure the lyrics are appropriate for the occasion, as you don't want any surprises or awkward moments during your first dance.
Finally, consider choosing a song that holds a special meaning for you as a couple. It could be a song that was playing on your first date, or one that you both love and feel captures your feelings for each other. You could also think about books or movies that you and your partner love and hire a band to create an elegant, instrumental version of a song from that source material.
Remember, there are no rules when picking your first dance song. Feel free to think outside the box and choose a song that makes you happy and reflects your unique relationship.
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Mother-son and father-daughter dances
Music is a key part of the wedding planning process, and choosing the songs for the mother-son and father-daughter dances is a special moment to highlight the unique bond between parent and child. The dance can be a fun, intimate, emotional, choreographed, or silly experience.
The song chosen for the mother-son and father-daughter dances should be heartfelt and speak to the relationship between parent and child. It can be a song that is unique to them, or one that they both love. It could be a song they listened to together when the child was little, or a tune by their favourite artist or band. It is a good idea to check the lyrics to ensure the song is wedding-appropriate, and if there are any iffy lines, these can be cut out.
For a traditional, classic, or vintage feel, some song options include:
- "Respect" by Aretha Franklin
- "Dancing Queen" by ABBA
- "Kiss" by Prince
- "Sweet Caroline" by Neil Diamond
- "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell
- "Unforgettable" by Nat King Cole
- "You Are So Beautiful" by Joe Cocker
- "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong
- "In My Life" by The Beatles
- "You've Got a Friend" by Carole King
- "You Raise Me Up" by Josh Groban
- "How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved by You)" by Marvin Gaye
For a modern twist, some song options include:
- "Espresso" by Sabrina Carpenter
- "You Are the Best Thing" by Ray LaMontagne
- "That's How Strong My Love Is" by Otis Redding
- "You Are My Sunshine" by Jimmie Davis and Charles Mitchell
- "Hold My Hand" by Jess Glynne
- "My Wish" by Rascal Flatts
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Songs for other parts of the day
Music is an integral part of a wedding, and it is important to choose songs that will create lasting memories. Here are some tips for choosing songs for the different parts of your wedding day:
For the wedding party's entrance, choose fun and exciting songs to energize your guests and get them in the mood for a celebration. During cocktail hour, play some upbeat tunes to keep the energy high, but not so upbeat that people are pulled onto the dance floor just yet. You want to save that for later!
For dinner, select low-key music that allows your guests to chat and mingle. You don't want the music to be too loud or distracting during this time. When it's time to cut the cake, consider a "sugar" or "sweet" themed song to match the moment.
If you're having a DJ, they will likely ask for a list of songs you want to be played and songs you don't want to be played. This will help them gauge your music taste and ensure you hear the songs you love. It's a good idea to provide a mix of genres and include some slower songs to give your guests a break from dancing.
When choosing songs for the mother-son and father-daughter dances, consider a song that holds a special meaning. It could be a song the parent has always loved or a tune that holds a cherished memory. You can also include song dedications to show appreciation for other family members and friends.
Finally, for the last dance, select a celebratory song to thank your guests for being a part of your special day.
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Must-play and do-not-play lists
When it comes to "must-play" and "do-not-play" lists for your wedding dance songs, there are a few key considerations to keep in mind. These lists are an essential part of the wedding music selection process, ensuring that you hear the songs you love and avoid the ones you dislike. Here are some detailed guidelines for crafting these lists:
Must-Play List:
- Reflect on your relationship: Choose songs that hold special meaning for you and your partner. This could include tunes from significant moments in your relationship, such as the first time you said "I love you."
- Consider your favourite genres and artists: If you and your partner have a shared love for a particular genre, such as country, Motown, or 70s disco, incorporate those styles into your must-play list. You can also include songs by artists you both enjoy, like Beyoncé.
- Think about the vibe you want to create: Select songs that set the desired tone for your wedding. For instance, you may want upbeat and celebratory music for your recessional or fun and energetic songs for your wedding party's entrance.
- Include dedications: Dedicate songs to your loved ones, such as your parents, as a special tribute. These songs can be announced by the DJ or played as a surprise for your family members.
- Choose a variety of songs: Ensure your must-play list has a mix of high-energy and slower songs to create a well-rounded playlist. You can also include a variety of genres to appeal to different groups of guests.
Do-Not-Play List:
- Avoid negative associations: If a song holds a negative memory or association, add it to your do-not-play list. You don't want any songs that may bring down the mood or remind you of heartbreak.
- Steer clear of controversial choices: Opt out of songs that may upset certain guests or contain excessive profanity. You may also want to avoid songs by artists whose personal choices conflict with your values.
- Leave out overplayed songs: If you're tired of hearing certain songs like "Party Rock Anthem" or "Gold Digger" at every wedding, feel free to exclude them from your special day.
- Consider your own tastes: Ultimately, this is your wedding, and you should fill your do-not-play list with any songs that you and your partner don't enjoy. Don't feel obligated to include traditional wedding songs like the "chicken dance" if they don't suit your tastes.
Remember, while creating these lists, aim for a balance. Provide your band or DJ with enough guidance, but don't overwhelm them with overly long lists that restrict their ability to read the room and use their expertise.
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Frequently asked questions
It's important to choose songs that you and your partner enjoy. You can also think about songs that hold a special meaning for you as a couple, such as a song that was playing when you first met. You can provide a list of songs you love and hate to your band or DJ, who will use their expertise to make adjustments based on how the crowd reacts.
The first dance song should reflect your relationship, joy, accomplishments, and excitement for your future together. It could be a tune from when you first said "I love you" or a cover of a special song by one of your favourite artists.
These dances can be an opportunity to pay tribute to family members. A common trend is for the groom to surprise his mother with a song choice that holds a special meaning for them.
It's a good idea to vary the pace of your playlist with a mix of high-energy and slower songs. You should also avoid songs with negative lyrics about love or heartbreak.
