Bridesmaids' Wedding Gift: How Much To Give?

Being a bridesmaid is an honour, but it can also be a financial burden. Aside from the cost of the bridesmaid's dress, shoes, jewellery, hair, makeup, manicures, bachelorette/bridal party, and travel expenses, it is customary for bridesmaids to give the couple a wedding gift. But how much should a bridesmaid spend on a wedding gift?

According to wedding etiquette, bridesmaids should plan on gifting the couple between $100 and $150 if they are showing up solo. However, if the bridesmaid is bringing a plus one, it is appropriate to spend between $100 and $200, or more, depending on their budget. If the bridesmaid is on a tight budget, a handwritten card or a group gift with the other bridesmaids is also acceptable. Ultimately, the most important thing is to express gratitude and congratulations to the couple.

How much should a bridesmaid spend on a wedding gift?

Being a bridesmaid is a big financial commitment. Aside from the costs of attire, travel, and accommodation, it is customary for bridesmaids to give the couple a wedding gift. But how much should a bridesmaid spend?

There is no hard and fast rule, and the amount you spend will depend on your budget and circumstances. If you are bringing a plus-one, it is common to spend a little more—around $100 per person is considered appropriate. However, this is by no means obligatory, and you should only spend what you can afford. It is also worth considering the costs you have already incurred as a member of the bridal party. If you are paying for your dress, hair, makeup, and accommodation, you may not have a large budget left for a gift. In this case, a lower-cost gift or a thoughtful card would be appreciated.

If you are struggling to decide on an amount, it may be helpful to allocate a portion of your budget specifically for gifts early on in the wedding planning process. This will ensure you don't spend beyond your means. It is also worth noting that you are not expected to give a gift at every pre-wedding event. For example, if you are hosting or contributing to the cost of the bridal shower, you are not required to spend a lot on a gift. Similarly, if you are travelling to an engagement party, there is less pressure to bring an expensive gift.

Ultimately, the decision of how much to spend on a wedding gift as a bridesmaid is a personal one and will depend on your unique circumstances.

Do bridesmaids give a bridal shower gift?

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it can also be a major financial commitment. There are many expenses to consider, from the bridesmaid dress and accessories to hair and makeup, travel, and accommodation. On top of that, there is the expectation of giving gifts at various pre-wedding events, including the bridal shower. So, what is the etiquette when it comes to bridal shower gifts for bridesmaids?

The Short Answer

Yes, it is customary for bridesmaids to give a gift at the bridal shower. However, this is not a hard and fast rule, and there may be circumstances where a gift is not required or expected.

The Long Answer

Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette

The bridal shower is typically a gift-giving event, and guests are usually expected to bring a gift for the bride. This gift is meant to be something exclusive to the bride, helping her prepare for her new life with her partner. These gifts can include household items, wedding luxuries, or travel essentials for the honeymoon.

How Much to Spend

It is recommended that guests, including bridesmaids, spend between $50 and $75 on a bridal shower gift. This amount is based on the 20-20-60 rule, which suggests that 60% of your total gift budget should go towards a wedding present, and the remaining 40% is split between pre-wedding events. However, if you are only invited to the bridal shower and wedding, it is suggested to divide your budget by 30-70.

Group Gifts

If budgeting is a concern, bridesmaids can consider dividing their expenses between the bridal shower gift and the wedding gift. They can also opt to go in on a group gift with the other bridesmaids, which can help reduce the individual financial burden.

When a Gift May Not Be Necessary

While gift-giving is customary at bridal showers, there may be instances where a gift is not required or expected. For example, if a bridesmaid has already contributed significantly to the bridal shower costs, such as food or decor, they may not be expected to spend money on an additional gift. In this case, they can choose to put that money towards a wedding gift or contribute to a group gift.

While the expectation to give a bridal shower gift may add to the financial burden of being a bridesmaid, it is important to remember that the amount spent on a gift is not a reflection of your relationship with the couple. It is always better to give what you can comfortably afford, and there are many thoughtful and affordable gift options available. Ultimately, the decision to give a bridal shower gift is a personal one, and bridesmaids should feel free to discuss any concerns or budget constraints with the bride or other members of the bridal party.

Do bridesmaids have to give gifts at pre-wedding events?

Being a bridesmaid is a big financial commitment. Aside from the wedding itself, there are several pre-wedding events that a bridesmaid is expected to attend and pay for. So, do bridesmaids have to give gifts at these pre-wedding events?

The Engagement Party

If the couple is throwing an engagement party, it is thoughtful to bring a gift as a way to congratulate the bride. However, this is not a requirement, especially if you are travelling to the party and already spending money on a plane ticket and accommodations. A nice bottle of champagne is always a good option, or you could get a personalised gift like a coffee mug or an engagement photo frame.

The Bridal Shower

The purpose of a bridal shower is to "shower" the bride with gifts, so it is customary to bring a gift. If you are hosting the event or contributing to the costs, you are not expected to spend a lot of money on an additional gift. You could opt for a group gift with the other bridesmaids or choose something from the couple's registry.

The Bachelorette Party

Planning and paying for the bachelorette party is one of the biggest responsibilities of a bridesmaid. Since you are already investing a lot of money into this event, you are not expected to give an additional gift. However, if the bachelorette party includes a lingerie shower, you would typically bring intimates or sleepwear for the bride.

The Rehearsal Dinner

You do not need to give a gift at the rehearsal dinner, as you will likely have already purchased a wedding gift for the couple by this point. Instead, you can share fond memories or give a speech to celebrate the couple.

While it is customary for bridesmaids to give gifts at some pre-wedding events, it is important to note that these gifts do not have to be expensive or extravagant. It is more important to show your support and celebrate the couple.

What are good bridesmaid gift ideas?

When it comes to bridesmaid gift ideas, it's a good idea to make each present as personal as possible. Take the time to pick out something that shows just how well you know your crew. For example, a personalised thermos for someone who loves the outdoors, or a luxe skincare set for a beauty-guru bridesmaid. If you're putting together gift baskets, you can include a few items that are the same for everyone, such as mini bottles of bubbly, cute hair ties, or personalised dress hangers.

It's also acceptable to buy all your bridesmaids a gift from the same category, such as jewellery. However, you should still choose something slightly different for each person. A necklace or bracelet featuring their birth flower or stone will feel personal no matter what.

• A personalised bracelet and necklace—spending $50-$75 on these can be a great gift, and will also ensure that your bridesmaids' accessories are coordinated.
• Matching bridal robes—these can be used on the day of the wedding and will make for great photos.
• Stylish clutches—these are another great gift that can be utilised on your wedding day, as your bridesmaids will need somewhere to keep their makeup and accessories. Having matching monogrammed clutches will ensure that there are no eyesores popping up in your wedding photos.
• Unique or personalised wedding favours—these can be gifts for your guests as well as your bridesmaids.

If you're on a tighter budget, small tokens like an affordable pair of earrings or personalised drinkware will go a long way.

When do you give bridesmaids their gifts?

There are a few different approaches to when you should give your bridesmaids their gifts. Here are some options:

At the Rehearsal Dinner

The rehearsal dinner is a traditional and popular time to give your bridesmaids their gifts. All of your bridesmaids will be in attendance, and it saves you from worrying about gifting on the wedding day. It also gives you the opportunity to thank your bridesmaids in front of close family and friends. However, if you are giving a gift that you would like your bridesmaids to use or wear on the wedding day, you may want to opt for an earlier time.

A Few Days Before the Wedding

If your wedding is a large event, with attendees travelling from out of town, you may want to give your bridesmaids their gifts a few days before the ceremony. This is especially relevant if you want your bridesmaids to wear or use the gift on the day of the wedding.

While Getting Ready for the Wedding

Giving your bridesmaids their gifts on the morning of the wedding is becoming an increasingly popular choice. This option allows you to have a close, heartfelt moment with each bridesmaid as you give them their gift. However, it is important to consider the practicality of this option, especially if the gift is something that cannot be worn, and your bridesmaids will need to find a place to store it during the day.

During the Wedding Speeches

Giving gifts during the speeches at the wedding reception is a traditional option. The groom will thank the wedding attendants during his speech, and then gifts will be presented. This option may be less intimate than some of the others, but it is a good choice for those who love tradition or are uncomfortable with emotional moments.

Just Before the Evening Reception

If you want to give an intimate gift but don't have time in the morning, you can plan to give your gifts half an hour before the evening reception starts. This timing will mean that you can thank your bridesmaids for everything they have done during the day, as well as in the lead-up to the wedding. It also means that your bridesmaids won't have to carry their gifts around all day.

Remember, there is no definitive 'right' way to give your bridesmaids their gifts. The most important thing is to show your appreciation and that you have thought of them.

Frequently asked questions